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With the season finale, we had a glimpse of Tartarus, the supposed maximum security prison of Equestria. Now picture this, imagine if Tartarus is so much more, maybe an underground city hundreds of miles beneath the surface where Equestria houses all its criminals. The depth varies on the crime you committed (obviously the lowest level is reserved for the most dangerous of the lot like Tirek). Picture in your head Dante's Inferno if you will.

So how does our story begin, our protag, a HIE, framed for a crime he did not commit (I'm just going to say murder) and Princess Celestia sentences him to life in depths of Tartarus. He spends the next 10 years orchestrating a plan to escape and prove his innocence. I imagine the story will be written as a journal, recording his entire experience. I also imagine he might run into all the villains in FiM like Flim & Flam, Sombra, Chrysalis, Gilda, Trixie maybe even Tirek, perhaps gain allies along the way. Does he make it out? Well, depends on the writer.

Thoughts?

3272016
ooh gives me a Dante's Inferno kind of feel. :pinkiehappy:

Or the idea could be that he did commit the crime, but has started to actually feel bad for it and wants to do right. Problem is its hard to prove your sincerity and that you truly want to repent when youre stuck with all these maniacs who all say the same thing. :eeyup:

:pinkiegasp: Sounds like an Awesome story!

Would definitely read it:twilightsmile:

3272365 Yes.

Would be interesting too if in his redemption he ended up helping some of the other prisoners (ones whose crimes aren't that bad like Gilda and Trixie and the Diamond Dogs) to better themselves and eventually go free.

3272742 :pinkiegasp:

I would definatly read that story. :pinkiehappy:

3272925 Trust in your skills. also it seemed your character just made his first nemesis. And I can guess already that the Griffon got a taste of injail justice due to how messed up his face was.

(Auntwas a jail guard) Prisoners sometimes have their own moral code and do not tolerate those who killed/raped children. :eeyup:

3272959 A marriage of convenience. or more simply. You help me, I help you. :eeyup:

3273048 Again. Id be interested to read it if you ever did write it. :pinkiesmile:

3273106 Im with John on this. That last part really came out of left field. :rainbowderp:

Dropbear
Group Admin

3273128
3273055
Um...

If you get sent to prison for property damage and lying, then I must be in the top ten most wanted. Why would Celly have control over this by the way, she's not god so it's really not up to her who gets sent to Hell.

I mean, the idea is good, it's just some points make no sense. At all.

Dropbear
Group Admin

3273141

Yeah...

No. That logic system is so flawed that soon everyone would be locked up. Luna, Rainbow Dash... actually all of the Main Six, Derpy, Celestia herself, Discord, every person who ever fought with another, etc.

Rapists and Murderers I can understand, but crimes that would normally fetch you community service at most? Nope.

Dropbear
Group Admin

3273170

Gehen Unzucht treiben mit einem faulen Wassermelone. Schnell!

Dropbear
Group Admin

3273197

Prinzessin Diana hat bereits verführt worden. Holen Sie sich auf meiner Ebene, die Sie Bauer, filth, dass kaum fit, um die Erde zu gehen. Whores schreien deinen Namen, deine Mutter anrufen, um Sie zu ihr wreched Bosum zurückzukehren. Schlegel rund wie das Tier Sie sind, Grunzen und Stöhnen wie ein Schwein im Schlachthof.

SIEG HEIL

Dropbear
Group Admin

3273227

You keep out of this!


3273225

Ihre Mutter war am siebten Tag des siebten Monats des siebten Jahres geboren. Durch den Teufel hervorgebracht, teilte sie Unternehmen mit Dämonen und Elenden, eine Gewerkschaft Foul mit allen Kreaturen groß und klein.

So war ihre Ausschweifungen, dass es für alle Zeiten in der Bibel, ein Rekord ihrer Missetaten und unheilig Kupplungen aufgezeichnet. Zahlreiche waren die Monster, die ihr Leben in ihre Tiefen Samen verschüttet, deine Mutter ruft immer wieder nach mehr, als ihre Lust war endlos.

Bald wurde ein Foul Kreatur aus ihrem Schoß, ein Wesen, das nur durch seine Mutter in horribleness wetteifern wurde hervorgebracht. Geboren, um die Welt für immer vereiteln mit seinen abscheulichen Gegenwart, bis heute existieren Sie mit nichts als üble Gerüche und verfilzt Körperbehaarung eigene nennen.

3273250
JUDEN WERFEN FLAMMEN
TOASTER STRUDEL

3272742 Wow, that was awesome stuff. You can have this idea if you'd like. :twilightsmile:

3273055
Flim & Flam - Other than fraud? Maybe their con finally went south and somepony died. Granny Smith would have been their first victim if Applejack hadn't stopped her.

Gilda - Bar brawl went bad and she accidentally killed somepony? I'd assume after the fallout with Dashie.

Trixie - Ursa Major, no Twilight Sparkle... nuff said.

I'd imagine Flim & Flam would actually run contraband down there so our Protag actually gets some of the equipment he needs to escape.

3272445 That's a really good idea too.

I also cooked up the idea that he discovered some kind of artifact down there, a weapon of some kind to help him fight his way out. That and his trusty notebook with 10 years worth of plotting.

3273407 And don't forget the most important tool anyone needs in the pits of hell. A source of light. :pinkiehappy:

If you ever write it and need a proofreader id be glad to help out.

3273096 I doubt Tartarus is pony Hell. it's just a name for a prison like Alcatraz.

3272016 I always thought of Tartarus as some hell spawn filled with monsters and fire. And if the protag survived he would be some scarred armored guy that wants his revenge on the sisters for putting him there.

3273601

Based on the realistic depiction of the Greek Tartarus. But I'd like to believe that in the FiM world, it won't be all fire and brimstone, rather just a huge city of convicts underground, Tartarus is just a fancy name for it. And let us develop a headcanon that the crime of 'murder' in Equestria is the most severe and those convicted are sent to the second lowest level (lowest reserved for villains like Tirek, Sombra and Chrysalis).

Sides, the whole, banished to Tartarus, clawed his way out wanting revenge trope is way to mainstream. I imagine our protag is just looking for a way out to clear his name.


3273599

And I agree with you there. Unless you broke one of the royal windowpanes :rainbowlaugh: Btw, if you follow Dante's Inferno, fraud is worse than murder. I think it's the 11th circle. Murder comes under Violence, that's the 9th circle.

3273666 Or he'd just escape, the whole main story being that escape, and at the end he just leaves.

Dropbear
Group Admin

3273683

*A stallion walks into a cell, the demon guards escorting him locking the door as soon as he gets through*.

"Hello new cellmate!"

*Stallion looks up, finds a male deer smiling down at him from the top bunk. The deer gets down, so short that he only comes up to the stallion's chest*

"Uh, hello," the stallion greets. "I'm Timeturner."

"Bambi!" the deer replies with a grin. "What did you get done for?"

*Timeturner looks to the ground and scuffs his hoof.*

"I stole a loaf of bread to feed my starving family. I got given ten years." *Bambi nods and pats him on the back.*

"Tough luck," *Bambi comforts, Timeturner smiling and looking at his new friend.*

"Thanks, what did you do?" *bambi's grin widens*

"Oh, I raped, killed, gutted, cooked and killed thirty-seven children and then posted the remains to their parents." *Timeturner is frozen, Bambi shrugs*. "Eh, I only got fifty years, you shoudl see what they gave the guy who tried to drown the world in lava."

*Timeturner lunges for the bars*.

"Why am I here!?"

3273683 That's why they have different levels. Imagine there be 20 levels underground, the ones who commit smaller to petty crimes end up on one level. Those whose crimes carry more weight, end up deeper and so on and so fourth. The criminals are often segregated from one another so the hardcore don't end up mingling with the small time criminals. Tirek and company end up at the lowest level. Btw, a Sheriff's office do not house criminals for long periods of time, they're just holding cells.


3273694 :rainbowlaugh: Why do I have the feeling there'll be a group created just for Tartarus related stories now?

Dropbear
Group Admin

3273710

So this is an Equestrian Prison then? Who the hell is staffing it? The main reason we have maximun security prisons is because of the tightened levels of security.

The prison I need to work at occasionally has a high-security section sure, but all of the serial killers get sent interstate.

3273680 That was the initial idea and he writes his entire experiences in his journal.

3273724 Just like:

The princesses hear of a murder that happened with the same intent and pattern, but they catch the true guy this time. They, and the mane six, go to tartarus to free and apologize to the protag, only to find out he escaped years ago.

3273719 I'd assume it'll be the Bat Ponies of the Hollow Shades, maybe some Minotaurs and Gryphons.

3273737 Heeyyyyyy, you maybe onto something here! That's probably how Twilight finds his journal!

3272016
I once heard some get thrown into a triple max slam and walk out of it after slitting some throats.

3274104 I did have Riddick in mind thinking over the idea. Though, I think it'll be better writing about half a bad ass who's also an intellect. If you're familiar with this show and this guy here:

3274143
It would be a grave mistake to think that Richard B. Riddick is only muscles and no brains. :ajsmug: Riddick's intellect is just more subtle and overshadowed by the grim methods he's using. His cunning is masked by the instincts he's putting on display. And you know what they say: If knowledge is power, then to be unknown is to be allpowerful.

3273745
3273756
And after they read the journal, they know where he escaped to...

Only to find out that he just recently died, and his final will and testament is along the lines of:

"I forgive you for what you've done to me, sorry we couldn't be friends."

3274231 He probably would have fled to some nation without extradition laws. Maybe the Gryphon or Dragon kingdoms.

I don't think it'll be THAT far back or in the future since he'll be running into Gilda, Trixie and the rest. My idea might also include Discord being the one who helps him escape, or maybe Discord is a fellow inmate he strikes a deal with.

3274227 Oh, I didn't say Riddick is a full fledged jock. I meant to say it'll be a good change from badass characters being thrown behind bars. :ajsmug:

3274629 Idea still up for the taking if you're interested. :pinkiehappy:

3274624
2 questions: Is Cerberus a guard? What about the warden? :twilightoops:

3274694 Cerberus might be considered a 'guard'. Probably the last line of defense against those trying to escape. The warden is probably an OC :twilightsheepish:

3274886 Can't wait to read it :twilightsmile:

3274674 Had the idea to have Gilda as his partner in crime. Thought she'd just be recently convicted of murder, had her wings clipped and tossed down to level 9 where all the hardcore criminals reside. Perhaps he finds a soft spot for her (he's been there 12 years, he was convicted when he was 16 so he knows the ropes) and perhaps he recruits more of them along the escape.

I'd assume without the use of the central elevator, it'll take them months to get to the surface.

3272016

Sorry, but I can't think Tartarus more different from the actual Greek Tartarus.

Thus, the only way to get in would be piss off Princess Celestia/Luna, and/or be a threat to the nation. Oh, and your punishment may vary from pushing a rock up an hill, only for said rock to roll back to start, to begin tied in a pot full of water that you can't drink because it lowers whenever you try, and under a tree with fruits you can't eat because the branches retract.

3276277 Or... he gets tempted by Tirek, because for some reason, Cerberus can't seem to detect him due to his otherworldly nature.

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