I wrote this because why not?

Step number 1- Read.

See, it's scientifically proven that if you don't know how to read, you don't know how to write. Consequently, if you don't know how to read well, your writing's gonna be shit. Read a bunch. Make sure it's good literature.

Step 2- Write

Just like walking, riding a bike, or playing the token bard class in any RPG, becoming good at writing takes practice. Lots and lots of practice. Write a bunch. Eventually you'll become good. Pick an idea after a while and flesh it out. If it works, congrats! Move on to step three! If not, go directly to step 1. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.

Step 3- Editing

Get a bunch of people who can make your incoherent chickenscratch into artistic prose of the gods, and make them look at whatever crap you cobbled together. If they like it, they'll fix it, and you can go to step four. Or, if they hate it, go back to step 2.

Step 4- Posting

You'll want to write a great description for your story, something that makes readers want to know more, but doesn't tell them everything. Suspense is key! Then post your shit to the site.

Step 5- Wait

They'll come to you. Just wait. If they don't, though, you can continue your story and hope for the best, or start from the top. Your choice.

Step 6- Power

People love your stories! Now, just have nervous breakdowns, strange events, and lack of updates!

And that's how you get to success.

I prefer my steps.

1. Mash keyboard until barely coherent words form.
2. Send it off to an editor who subsequently cries at my destruction of the english language.
3. Post.
4. Profit (if the fanfiction gods are generous that week)

519971

1. Mash keyboard until barely coherent words form.
2. Send it off to an editor who subsequently cries at my destruction of the english language.

519980
Oh wait, let me try this again.

1. Create HiE story with worst cliche's and horrible plot.
2. Make editor want to bleach his eyes.

519982

Oh wait, let me try this again.

1. Create HiE story with worst cliche's and horrible plot.
2. Make editor want to bleach his eyes.

519971 519980

1. Mash keyboard until barely coherent words form.
2. Send it off to an editor who subsequently cries at my destruction of the english language.

Pretty sure most of the people I edit for use these two steps.

520133
I totally "lol'd" at that picture.

I can picture that being your face at some of the shit I send you.

519980

Azu. Commas.

520176

520193

Looks like I just... crashed Azu.

/shades

Or really just the simplest formula of them all:
1. Write erotic fiction, chock-full ridiculous euphemisms for genitalia.
2. Post your fic.
3. Watch as horny teens flock to your fic to jerk off. Instant feature box.

520244 The scary thing is now I want to test this and see just how well it works...?