A Short, Stupid Thought · 5:10pm Oct 7th, 2021

Another stupid short thing. It's not [mature], but is [mature] adjacent? Check behind the break if you want. Comic may give some sort of context. Or not. It was the inspiration.

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“Hey, Twilight!” Dash barged into the throne room without waiting to be announced. “Your mom’s mailing me porn spells again.” She proffered a scroll. "This one gives a mare a penis."

Metal shoes hurt slightly more than a uncovered hoof when impacting ones own face. “Ugh. Mom!” Twilight's ears folded back against her head and she felt her cheeks warm. She glanced away from Rainbow Dash, unable to meet her friends eyes. “Ever since Flurry Heart entered primary school, she’s been onto both of us about having grandfoals.”

When Rainbow spoke, Twilight imagined she could hear the frown on her face. “She knows that you’re like, ninety-seven percent gay, right? And that we’re not married? Or even dating?”

“I think she’s just trying to hedge her bets and is sending letters to any creature I’ve ever thought was cute.” Twilight nearly bit her tongue trying to stop those words, but it was too late. “Um, that is—“

Her gaze was drawn back to Rainbow. Who was smirking—, no, outright leering at her. “So you think I’m cute?”

Twilight made several sounds, but none of them were words.

With a toss of her head, Rainbow let the letter fall to the floor. “I’m still not looking to date, but if you need to help get tying your mom off of your back…” Rainbow drew out the last word, and waggled her eyebrows at Twilight for some reason. “I’d totally help out with that.”

Twilight snorted and rolled her eyes. “Mom once delivered a scathing lecture about punctuality and the importance of a regular bedtime to a Celestia when I was fifteen minutes late getting home. Marched right up to the castle, waited in the petitioners line, and just let Celestia have it in the throne room, in front of everypony. I doubt she’ll be much intimidated by a Wonderbolt, no matter how awesome she is.”

“Seriously, Twilight?” Dash fixed her with a pointed glare.

“What? I'd be intimidate, but mom is basically immune to fear.”

Rainbow just kicked the letter closer to Twilight. “Your mom sends me a dick spell, I offer to help with your lack of foals problem, and you think my plan is to go yell at your mom?"

“Oh.” Twilight blinked. It took her a moment to figure it out. She felt the temperature in her cheeks rise along with her wings. “Oh!”

“ 'Oh' is right." Dash shot Twilight her wing feather guns. How was she so calm? How were her cheeks not the red hot balls of fire that Twilight’s were?

“Um. Yes.” Twilight tried to hide behind her mane, but it just waved away from her face. A wing would have to do. But from behind the safety of that wing, she said. “Yes. let’s— let’s go do that.”

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