Chapter 3 Part 9 Up(Jan 22nd)/Background Series Part 4 · 11:36pm Jan 23rd, 2021
If you have not seen it already, Chapter Three Part Nine was posted Friday afternoon. Forgot to post a blog about it, whoops. That marks the end of Chapter Three, so if you were waiting on that to read it, you should be good.
So since I did I thought I would combine this with my next bit of background information on the story. Spoilers ahead for the entirety of Chapter Three. If you have not read it yet, viewer discretion is advised.
So, planning this case was… difficult, to say the least. I’ve mentioned before I had to reorganize the story back after the end of Chapter Two, because something I intended to set up did not go according to plan at the time. That, specifically, was Rarity and Applejack. I had intended for them to be at each other’s throats. They were to spend the whole chapter becoming more and more outraged with each other, with Rarity especially losing control over her temper and acting out until finally they would both be found dead in the morning.
Initially they would appear to have killed each other, Applejack perishing from a blunt impact to the head, and Rarity from a stab wound to the heart. The room would be a massive mess, appearing as if a huge struggle occurred. But then the clues would start to emerge. Rarity’s stab wound would’ve been with something made of lead, because the Monoponi file would indicate lead in her system. Then it would turn out she’d actually died of lead poisoning, from lead sugar being added to her tea. Applejack would’ve also been poisoned, albeit in some other way. (I think I was considering a protein drink, as a blatant THH reference.)
In reality, the two of them would’ve both been killed by the same person: Twilight Sparkle, who was supposed to be watching Sunset in the first two investigations, and then deliberately trying to mislead Sunset in the third. She was to be far less apologetic and a bit less sane, far closer to Lesson Zero snapping than she ever came in the actual story, where she snapped more out of desperation and shame. She was supposed to have broken in some way, becoming close to a monster. She’d say she did it all for Flash, and Flash was supposed to be horrified beyond belief.
But while this could’ve been an interesting alternate case, in retrospect I’m glad it didn’t work. Not only did Rarity and Applejack get together (for a little bit) but I would’ve effectively committed a form of character assassination against Twilight. I liked the idea of someone killing two other people and blaming it on each other, but I couldn’t cotton it being Twilight.
So then with my rearranged case, I started working out details. I wanted an angry crime of passion death, but I also I wanted someone to die “on accident” from someone like Pinkie doing something. I had many ideas here, with a lot of them focused on the library, something as simple as bumping into her and she shrieks in pain, and breaks the library rule. Then later Pinkie would admit her guilt and Rainbow would kill her. This would’ve seen Fluttershy not be considered a victim for the case, leaving us with only one victim for Chapter Three.
But I didn’t like that either. I wanted to honor the Chapter Three trend of multiple victims whilst still getting both kinds of deaths I wanted. So I ended up settling on the ring plan because of a secondary aspect to this case.
You see, Twilight’s whole argument against Diamond Tiara was how this was going to go down. While writing my rough drafts, I actually got as far as halfway through part three still intending for this to be the case. Tiara was going to be behind both murders, by misleading Pinkie Pie (originally in a conversation where she claimed Rainbow Dash asked her to ask PInkie) and then fooling Dash into trying to murder Pinkie only for her to cause death in some way, which went more or less the way it did with Trixie, just with Tiara doing it on purpose, intentionally.
Warning: potential future spoilers:
In fact, the secret Diamond Tiara shared with Sunset? This was supposed to be a setup not just to explain why she reacts to the word bitch, but as foreshadowing her execution. My husband and I worked out this whole execution where Tiara would be saddled with gold-brick heels and rags, and forced to run down a long, looong corridor to get to something that looked like it was freedom to the outside, while being chased by three dogs. She’d get to the room, it’d be revealed to be fake, and she’d be mauled to death, torn apart alive until she would finally have one tear out her throat. We even had an amazing name for this execution:
Diamond in the Ruff.
So now you know what to expect for her if she turns out to be the culprit of Chapter Four or Five.
End of future spoilers.
But as I continued writing… I realized several things. I was losing the intended connection with Twilight, Diamond Tiara was proving to be nicer than I expected (and not at all like a genius able to mislead everyone like that) and… it felt too obvious. Far too obvious, in fact, to the point that I hated it. So I had to figure out what to do. I’d already written two and a half parts. I’d set everything up. Not only that, I had almost all the clues already put together in my planning document for the investigation. So unless I wanted to throw out everything and start over, I had to adapt what I already had.
So the plan changed mid-chapter. I brought back in Twilight Sparkle and a note, rather than a conversation. I expanded the exchange she had with Pinkie to foreshadow things better. I then added in the aspect of her possessing Adagio’s secret to give her a reason to distrust Sunset. The secrets weren’t supposed to be available to all this early; that wasn’t supposed to happen till Chapter Four.
Incidentally this is the real world reason they haven’t shared their secrets with each other yet: because they weren’t supposed to be able to yet. In universe, however, it’s because they’re a bit dim.
Then I had to decide who was going to kill Pinkie. For a little while, I returned it to Rainbow Dash, so she’d actually be guilty. But that felt too problematic, not to mention obvious. It presented the same problem as Tiara did. So I needed someone else to act, to do the dirty deed.
Enter Trixie. I’d already been expanding her character, with her conversation re her sexual/romance orientation with Sunset as a way of showing they were becoming closer as friends. She was overly attached to Sunset, and it let me use the motive.
See the motive was another problem. By introducing a motive that allows you to take a plus one, that gives the couples an obvious incentive. That would’ve also made things too obvious.
Thus I built upon layer after layer of deception. Rainbow thinks she killed Pinkie, so she lays false trails that Rarity and Applejack did it. Trixie lays further false trails on Adagio. Rainbow Dash inadvertently makes Trixie’s job easier by losing her mind with her magic, causing Adagio to act more suspicious through the investigation, hurrying things along as if she’s trying to cover things up. The separation to sleep by herself was another layer, to give her the chance of having an opportunity to kill, with a perfectly logical, believable innocent reason for her to go sleep on her own, leaving it in doubt. Meanwhile, sprinkle two tiny clues that link to Trixie--the shower clue, and the legerdemain that JCarp pointed out in the investigation--and the case was made.
The end result produced a far stronger, more compelling, and more fascinating case, with everyone acting much more believably in character, whether it was Pinkie and Rainbow’s interactions, Twilight embarking on a completely stupid plan that naturally blows up in her face, Fluttershy becoming an innocent victim rather than a blackened like I once had planned, and so on and so forth. Not only that, so many things are set up for Chapter Four and Five that they fell into place once I’d made my decision.
So why did Trixie get to live, and why did Twilight die? Many reasons. Most of them were explained in-story. Beyond that however, Monoponi wanted her dead. He wanted her dead. He was never, ever going to let her get out of this game alive. Did he have anything, ultimately, to do with what she did that got her executed? No. If this hadn’t happened, would he have intervened in some way to arrange a motive that tempted her enough to kill? Yes, he would have. Had she survived this chapter, she would’ve been the Chapter Four or Five blackened. I never wanted her to be a victim, because it would’ve been a disservice to her character.
And I’m ultimately glad the story went the direction it did. It’s a change from what I intended, but it’s a change for the better. It sets up so many things for the future that I ended up with a far, far better Chapter Five than I ever would’ve had with my original plan.
Feel free to ask questions on any specific details you’re curious to know more about. I’m sure there’s several things I didn’t elaborate on that could be of interest.
Interesting how the only one that Monoponi was going to make sure would be a killer was Twilight, while everyone else was fair game
Hmm~ well honestly I’m curious on what plans you have for Trixie? Though.. that would give be giving out potential spoilers as I’m now really really curious on her character for the rest of the story because I have a BIG theory with her. And it all depends on how the Case 4 trail goes (though I’ll wait until that comes close to the investigation part)
5441032
Well, he's targeted others too. Sweetie Belle was deliberately targeted with the motive. So was Timber. The difference is that he would've taken extra steps.
5441035
I can tell you, but only over PM. I'd like to hear your theory over PM as well, if you're willing. All I'm willing to say publicly is that she's still important.
5441037
Sure I’m willing to talk in pm about it
5441037
Yeah, that what I mean.
Even if the others weren't the blackened for their trials, he probably wouldn't have cared either way.
And I kind of also want to know Trixie's fate in PM's now too
I’m not sure if you’ve answered this in any of the other blog posts, but what do you plan out first? The actual murder or who dies/is blackened. I’m not sure if that makes sense. I’ve just been wondering. All of your chapters are very well thought out. You’re an excellent writer!
5441071
Gosh, thank you. I don't know if I'd say excellent, but I try.
To answer the question: I usually decide who dies and who kills first, and then go from there. Chapter Three was the only exception to that rule, and only because I waffled so often in my decision making process. But, as they say, a writing problem is just an opportunity you haven't figured out yet.
I prefer to select the blackened and victim first because that allows me to customize the murder properly. Setting is also crucial. I determine settings long before murders. One of the very first things I did after deciding upon the cruise ship was figure out what sort of amenities it would feature, and thus, what's available for a crime.
I'm glad Applejack and Rarity didn't die in this chapter. Though, now that they're at each other's throats, I suspect that's going to play a role in a future case. Call it a hunch.
5441414
Maybe.