6:40 AM ~ The Beat Goes On... · 1:27pm Jan 9th, 2021
I'm up sitting in my living room at 6:40 AM.
I've been up since 2:00 AM mind you.
Been a long while since I've blogged , so why not?
How is the RNG that is life been treating you?
I've rolled several Critical Fails myself recently.
One trusting that people can change.
You invite somebody into your home thinking that you'll be treated with respect, but I can say from experience that you'll only end up sleeping on your cold as hell couch for a good long while, my knees and back are still killing me.
Only for that person you invited in out of the cold to flick you off before leaving basically, I'm not talking just the classic flick either.
We're going full metaphorical on this one, they eat your fridge dry, borrow money and like a fart on the wind they dash out over the horizon, with the balls to block you from thier phone.
Only a half assed letter left behind to explain, why you're a dumbass for trusting someone.
If this person sounds like a horrible friend.
Then don't worry it's just my sister.
Second Fail comes from my Stimulus.
Everybody State Side get yours?
I wasted most of mine.
Buying groceries for a packed apartment and loaning out $200 to my sister left me just about $100, I doubt I'm getting paid back because if the whole blocking my number thing.
So don't loan out monies kids.
I've started to learn that overextending yourself to help others isn't too smart, thinking with your heart leads you down some really lackadaisical life paths. You need to use your head more often, everybody out there is looking after themselves.
They're searching for people like myself, idiots that are easy to manipulate.
So just cut out the embaresment and simply don't trust anyone.
Trust me, I wouldn't lie to you.
But then again I just said don't trust anyone.
Soooo, be manipulated who knows it might just work out for you.
Anyways that's my rant for now, I'm going to enjoy myself with what little I have left.
I've earned that much.
See You Around, F.
I feel sorry for you.
I may not have been in this same situation that you have been through, but as far as family goes mine has had it's share of bad seeds. I've had an uncle who's had it out against my own father, and he was the black sheep of the family (Even as his own brother I might add). At first I made nothing of it as a kid, how would I know? Now I don't want to say anything that's deeply personal, but let's just say my uncle ended up doing 'terrible' things to himself and now he's pretty much out of our lives. Doesn't help with this one confrontation at the 'old' Hard Rock Casino... I'll never even forget that look on his face.
Same with one of my aunts, whom used to be special (Least to me). I'd visit her at her apartment at the time when mom and dad would go out or if my sister and I needed a place to stay or at least someone to look out for us. She'd make dinner, we'd watch movies, and we'd talk. At the time, she 'was' good to the family... 'was'. But then the same thing happened to her and all of a sudden... she just changed for the worst. And I haven't spoken to her or even that uncle aforementioned since.
You can't always trust 'anyone', not even your own family (This lesson I know for a fact). But just because you cannot trust 'anyone', that does not mean for a fact you can't trust 'all'. You go on saying about how 'everyone' is manipulative and cannot be trusted, but in doing so it also shuns the 'good' people in the world who 'do' care for one's well being and everything you say is out of anger and frustration. You have every right to be angry, it's a normal emotional response for things beyond all control. But don't think for a moment there aren't people who do care about you, who appreciate your contributions, and would sacrifice a time of their day to look out for you. When family cannot be trusted during these trying times (Not 'all' families, but most), you do have 'friends' who do care and even if they cannot do 'anything' to redeem you of what happened they still have hearts in the right places.
If you need a moment to fume and let the anger release itself, I for one humbly respect your wishes. I can only hope with upmost certainty that what goes around eventually comes around. If you're so called 'family' or at least your own father or sister wish to shut you out after everything you've done (Mostly for your own sister) then just leave them... to seal themselves to their own fate. If they don't need you, you don't need them either.
You are not a child, you're an adult. You're better off showing the world what you can do and you never needed them from the start.
I'm so sorry to hear that!
I would never treat you that way, ever.
It just pisses me off that someone would just do that to someone that's shown nothing but kindness and generosity. Best we could do is just wait for some light karma to strike on 'em, I guess.
But don't worry, love. I still trust you with all my heart, my life even, and I hope you still trust me just as much. I want to pull you away from selfish people like that. ❤
Dang, Dramamaster said it better than I ever could...
I dunno, man, I trust you. But I get what you mean.
Been there done that in the trusting people I shouldn't department. Then again, I was dumb enough to trust people I shouldn't, so I deserve every bit of pain, suffering & misery that comes my way as result of it.
#iamtoostupidtobeallowedtolive
#myparentshouldhaveabortedme