• Member Since 20th Sep, 2018
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The Blue EM2

Happy to be here at last.

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Yet another stellar example of how not to write a story... · 7:29am June 5th

[Unpublished stories cannot be embedded]

The fact this has comments disabled says a lot, really...

Report The Blue EM2 · 137 views ·
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Comments ( 39 )

...Looks like we got another Critical Critique on our hooves. Maybe.

Also what the buck is up with the “Porn” tag????

This one will be exceptionally hard to read.

Bad English, a nonsensical plot, and it really should be an M with the porn tag...

I’ve actually seen a bunch of T-rated stories with the “Porn” tag... but they’re just not supposed to feature things like explicit sex.

Oh. I didn't know that.

I couldn’t even finish the first chapter. It is simply that poorly written.

I'll summarise the rest;

Wind Rider has sex with RD whilst she's drunk (thereby making it rape under English law, as a drunk person legally cannot give consent), and she ends up pregnant with his foal.

Why was I expecting anything less?

At the very least it makes me more confident in my own writing.

:facehoof: I don't know which is going to be worse, this or Across the universe. Just reading Bez's Critical Critique on Across the universe made me want to puke. Guess I'll have to see if I actually puke when Bez uploads his new episode of Critical Critique.

Speaking of which, 5277307, I commend you on that. You have summarized a story that makes you puke regardless of what you want into a blog where you can somewhat control your gag reflexes.

He (or she, I'm not assuming genders here) did one of a LonelyFanboy48 story recently that was absolute garbage.

Oh, you mean Rainbow Rocks (Partial) Rewrite? I read that review as well, and it was bearable compared to the previous review. Like, of all the badly written stories I've seen on this site, Across the universe takes the cake.

Also, I just read Chapter 1 of The revenge of wind rider. I don't know why I expected this to be something that I could endure. I mean, based on what you said, the story isn't so bad plotwise: there are plenty of stories like that out there, even here on Fimfiction. What truly screws it up is the way the author wrote it. There are typos galore, the grammar is all off, dialogues look nothing like they should, etc.

Okay... let's see what sorts of clusterpunk this guy wrote...
*One glance at the like/dislike ratio* Holy f— :pinkiegasp::twilightoops::rainbowhuh::rainbowlaugh::pinkiecrazy::twilightangry2:

Ring Rider gets his revenge on Rainbow Dash

.........RING Rider?
I'm scared.

Yeah. Stay away from televisions.

It's been unpublished.

Thank Oculus. He reported it.

Reminds me of when I reported a story that blatantly plagiarized “Daughter of Discord.”

Oof. I once wrote a story that accidentally resembled another.

Reach for the Sky is unintentionally similar to Wedding Problems.

Thankfully, there was no issue. Unintentional similarities occur in media all the time.

As long as it ain’t deliberate plagiarism.

As long as it ain't.

Looks like it was unpublished

In summary;

Wind Rider gets RD drunk and has sex with her. Fast forward 3 months and RD's pregnant.

My thoughts exactly.

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