Morning Dreams · 3:23am Jan 25th, 2020
Dreams are a strange place sometimes...
I snuck into a private movie screening for an tall, lanky Egyptian dictator who had survived a assignation attempt that had cost him his leg. The movie was being screened in honor of his receiving a transplant to replace his old prosthetic after an surgery abroad. I was an accomplice to the main character who was leading our foray. He got us in by copying an old Peter Sellers film called The Mummy (presumably about stealing a mummy while disguised as a Egyptian leader). There was a Sellers look alike, who was sneaking through a row of amphora displayed on pedestals. The two played cat and mouse through them rows, using the trick where the person holds up a mirror framed as a portrait to confirm their identity. This apparently fooled the lookalike, who bore a resemblance to my partner, thinking he saw his own reflection in the mirror. Strangely, it also fooled security since they saw my partners reflection in the picture cum mirror, and decided he matched the face of the dictator. All this, in spite of the mirror facing away from my accomplice's face!
Ian McKellen, voiced by Patrick Stewart, joined our team once we were inside the towering glass skyscraper for the journey. We also bumped into Tom Kane, voice of Wulf Yularen and the announcer from The Clone Wars, but didn't remember his name. We traveled together on an glass elevator, then split from Tom and boarded a glass futuristic people mover that moved at an alarmingly high speed in an ever ascending spiral to the top of the skyscraper. It scared me, as I don't like heights. Around us, people were being to titter, becoming suspicious. Was this guy really the dictator and his guards?
Finally, we arrived at the top floor of the skyscraper where the movie theater was. There was a large, crowded exhibit on the dictators recent reconstructive surgery on the same floor we'd have to navigate through to reach the theater. The dictator been wounded in a failed bomb attack, infographic informed us. A small video screen played a clip that showed it had cost him his entire leg, which was then replaced by a sophisticated prostesis on which he hopped about. We suddenly realized the the main character’s crude metal leg brace was an terribly an inaccurate depiction of a supposedly already healed injury. We removed it, discretely, and had him carry it but increasingly felt the jig was up. We were certain to be spotted now. At last, we entered the theater...
~~~
The First Orders new female leader, a Sith Witch, gloated over capturing Yavin 4. It was a great blow to the morale of the Resistance, to take the very site of their first great victory against the old Empire. The formerly lush jungle moon is stark and barren, it's surface rocky grey and muddy brown. Two great caves are beneath her, their entrances closed by great metal blast doors. They are hangers, the smaller one the original Rebel hanger and the second a newly constructed First Order hanger. Both buzz with industrial activity, and TiE fighters buzz overhead.
But more impressive is the yawning chasm, swirling with mystic energy and filled with a green swamp like liquid. It is the Exact Center of the Force! Two hideous blob-like creatures, with little form other than folds of fat and two elephantine legs, serve the Witch as her lackies. They look over the pool and gloat with her. One suggest destroying the force now, once and for all. This enrages her, and she throws him into the eye of the whirlpool. She then pushes his brother in, who swims after him and retrieves his melting corpse. He is even more morbidly obese than his brother and wearing purple. He is Sith ladies husband, which is apparently why he hasn’t melted. Sopping wet and dejected, he slinks off into the depths of the massive black castle that looms over the center of the force, their new home and fortress.
~~~
I am the female protagonist, living in my lovely ultra modern house with our three bengal cats. Recently we have gotten three new kittens, and are trying to rearrange things to get more space. My parents have forgotten about the existence of the central spiral staircase that leads from our down stairs to the second and third floors. They have forgotten about it but the cats haven’t. I probe it’s depths (I’m upstairs) and shew one of our beautiful bengals out of it. My hen-pecked father is reminded by my mother that they bought this house cheaply from a “pawn broker”, as they watch incredulously from downstairs. Where I am now, somewhere on the staircase between the second and first floor, there is a multipart cat tree that overlooks the living room. The staircase is well camouflaged by some flowers in a vase. Everything is white and pristine, because it is the future. I remove the cat tree from the stairwell and split up the three parts to encourage the cats to sleep elsewhere from now on, and to give the three bengals and three kittens an equal chance to find a sleep spot. Hopefully, this will give us more breathing room in spite of doubling the cat population. Mission accomplished?
The Sith lady is reprimanded in the middle of the night by the Emperor's Force Ghost. Somehow, the loss of a single lackey and the interior redecoration of a modern home to accommodate increased cats has dealt the forces of evil a great defeat.
It is a year later, now. I’m forcibly force linked with the Sith Witch now. She's called me up as I prepare breakfast in the kitchen, while doing much the same, to complain about her defeat and the resulting depression. Her obese husband then emerges from the shadows and vows to get revenge for his beloved wife and cure her depression! He bypasses the elevators that link their penthouse suite with the rest of the castle's tallest spire.
I am him, and instantly regret the choice to take the stairs. He had actually intended to use the elevator, but first to convince his guards or his wife to follow his cause, and suggest to their new leader they all go down as a group. I barely make it down the first two flights of stairs, breathing heavily at first theatrically and then genuinely. I can barely make it to the glass waiting lounge station on the next floor. It should have elevators. The stations are a regular feature of the building (Brother was fat enough to occasionally use the stairs to get to them, but now the stairs are only used by staff). I collapse before I reach the door.
~~~
I am the girl again. I am at a crazy teen lesbian sex party in a skyscraper, to sell a movie idea. I enter and meet with the man who runs the party, known as “Big Red” to it's patrons, who is a debauched version of Santa Claus. He dosen’t listen to my idea, but picks me to replace his main whore, who is kinda a bitch. I hate this initially, as he disgusts me, but over the next few weeks I grow to like my position and feud with the whore to protect it. She publicly threatens to kill me, and regain her place beside Big Red. I then humiliate her into submission with a verbal smack down in front of Big Red and the party, which brings the festivities to an end. I leave with Big Red on an elevator. I am so done with this night. I use my magic to turn into a version of Amethyst from Steven Universe. The elevator doors slam shut, obscuring us from view, but on the way down I tell Big Red my tragic, insane backstory. By the time we reach the lobby, and the doors open once again, I have scarred him for life. He has been reduced to a blubbering, reformed Santa Claus. I walk off throughly done with this shit, and breaks the fourth wall to say to the camera I’m feeling so Garnet (which inexplicably is the name of my current form in this universe) right now.
It's a week later, at the next iteration of this never-ending party.
I am waiting in line as "Garnet", with my older, prettier sister and her hot friend. Sister talks about how this party mostly isn’t usually their scene (they are 20 somethings), but if you can get some exposure for your singles (she's the musician of the family) through the party and maybe some sex too it’s a pretty win win situation. I already know all about this place, I think (they don't know I'm a hero, apparently). The wait in line is long, and Sister's friend breaks away from us briefly. When we finally start moving, she's already paired off and is making out with another girl who was ahead of us in line. We wave and congratulate her as we walk past. The head of the line, nearest the door, is where the most desperate girls hang out, making passes at everyone in line. Velma tries to go with us, but Sister and I reject her and make fun of her weight. We walk into the party, laughing.
~~~
I wake up. It's 7:00, Friday morning. My blood sugar is low, and the cat is downstairs running about and yowling for his food. I silently curse OGM, for being able to dream logical snd coherent stories.
No, I'm not on drugs, I swear. Also, no Rise of Skywalker spoilers, please.
I wrote this insanity down as a reaction to one of the people at my diabetic support group saying that he writes down his dreams that he gets with late night lows. I read it to OGM, and after much hysterics he suggested I turn it into a blog. So blame him, I guess?
I think most of the dreams were inspired by watching adorable cat videos, and American Dad before going to bed. And I really am afraid of heights.
I was at first very confused, before realizing part of the way through the first paragraph that the blog title was in fact a description of what this was. :D
Definitely some interesting scenes in these dreams, Blue! I have to admit I was just a bit worried after a little reading, until I realized you had been dreaming.
Ha! Yes, dear readers, fear not ... twas but a passing dream, nothing more. Though the constant head hopping, plot holes, and mistakes might have made for a convincing facsimile of a bad fanfic. My apologies if I alarmed you, I only intended to amuse.
What drugs have you been taking, and may I have some?
Better than the last movie I watched.