Putting my story on hiatus · 1:40am Nov 16th, 2012
Okay... I am putting this story on hiatus and here is why. After a lot of thinking, and some feedback from two of my fav authors on this site, plus a couple of other things, I have come to realize that while my story is liked and good, it is badly in need of revision. Two of the most successful authors on this site both have said the same thing; My story has a lot of potential, but they pointed out a laundry list of things that subtracted from my story I had no idea were even there. This being the case, and I have to say that I agree with them, I am going to put this story on hiatus. I am going to go back with a fine tooth comb, and I am going to rewrite the chapters I have already written. I have no idea how long this process is going to take, but I know that it will not be a quick one. I ask for your patience. When this story is done being rewritten, I promise you that it will be much, MUCH better. I thank all of you for the support that you have shown me, and I will do my very best to come back a better, and more humble writer.
pinkie.ponychan.net/chan/files/src/132096412149.jpg
I am sad, but I can understand..
If there is anything I could do to help get this story going, please ask! I am not claiming to be a great author or a great help, but I want to try if I am able to...
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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
507247 Besides your patience, I would greatly appreciate any tips to how to write in a Show rather than Tell way. Those were the two biggest things that I was told about.
507248 Sorry, but it had to be done. My story will be much better off by me doing this. Please, just be patient with me?
Please?
507254 BAH, fine. Quality over quantity. A good story taking forever to update is better than a shitty story generating chunks of bullshit.
Note: I am not calling your story shitty. o_o
here have an octy plot
//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia_plot.png
507261 Thanks. I am surprised that me doing this is getting this kind of reaction. It still amazes me that people like my story, so thank you for your support. I promise that this will be EXTREMLEY better once it is done, no matter how long it takes.
507247 You beat me to posting that image Racko, you beat me to it
507270 I'm surprised that your story has this reaction too. It's your first story, but I'm being butthurt.
Good luck with the edits, and whatnot. If you need a prereader, I'm available. And stuff.
havearowofOctyplots
//dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia_plot.png //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia_plot.png //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia_plot.png //dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia_plot.png
507276 Patience...
507280 Yeah I know, I can agree with your choice as far, and like any other of your fans would offer, if any help is needed just ask
507278 The two authors that I referred two are SaddlesoapOpera and Japanese Teeth. The both pretty much had the same things to say. When two authors, who have had a great amount of success with thier own stories are telling you the same thing.... You know that you need to listen.
As far as you being a pre reader, thanks for the offer. I will take you up on that when I get to that point.
507289 Thanks.
507251
Well, I honestly don't know, I'm not even sure how much I am showing, not telling. I just write how I would imagine being there.
I *was* told I did a great job at showing, not telling.
All I do is try to imagine myself in the scene and describe how it would be like, so best I can say is to be very, very descriptive, add details during dialogue to show what everypony, or at least whomever is speaking, is doing while they talk.
I need to learn how to be more descriptive, myself, I believe...
507276 Hahaha
507278 Good stories usually get good reactions, even if they start off needing a little polishing.
507270 I am with Arby Works, if you need a pre-reader, I am here and willing to do my best.. And to bounce ideas off of if you want to.
507291 None of my favourite authors watch my stories. 'cept for one. Ol' Path_of_Cloud. He's a bit of a dear... but yeah, if your favourite authors (who also have immense success) tell you to rewrite, probably a good idea to listen (unless their stories revolve around HiE and are riddled with bad grammar).
507299 My writing style either consists of what Racko does, or I tell it from the point that I actually imagine myself as the main character. p.s. Darkwing Duck is the best cartoon ever XD, I remember it t this day
507303 Path_of_Cloud was one of the very first to read my story and comment on it. I have learned a lot from his feedback.
As far as the two authors I mentioned, If you have not read any of thier stories, WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! GO NAO, AND READ SOME OF THEM! Seriously, both of them are superb authors, and it is SaddlesoapOpera who inspired me to start writing in the first place.
507310 Darkwing Duck is a very good cartoon.
507321 Indeed
507330 So was Duck Tales but that wasn't as good, Disney used to be amazing
507333 And then they stopped making stuff with Anthropomorphic animal people DX
507299 Thank you. All I can say is thank you. I will defitnetley want you as a pre-reader.
507303 So I'm not one of your favorites? I see how it is...
Ah well, I still need to read Spectrum, still haven't gotten around to it... Maybe I will get a chance to after I finish my next chapter, I have almost all week off cause my boss is a jerk and cutting my hours in half after giving a small raise...
507317 SaddlesoapOpera's most popular fic I'm not a fan of, sadly. I've never heard of the other one. I will check him out, but no guarantees.
507340
Squeee!
I might try to get The Dragon Warlock to look into your story and see if he likes it/would want to help pre-read. He is one of my pre-readers and is one of my biggest helps for looking at situations from a different angle. I will also ask TheMyth to look into it.
While I was writing this, I got 2 watches, what the hay?
507350 I highly recommend that you do. Here is a link to his user page.
507355 Okay, I might regret asking this, but just how much do you like my story?
507355 Oh, go right ahead and ask anyone you think would have good criticism to give. I welcome all of it.
507360 Story's seem okay. As long as he doesn't murder my Sparity boner, I'll read.
507382
507370
Before or after you smacked it a few times?
Before, it was about 4/10, based on the first 2 chapters. It had great potential, but seriously needed some work to be great.
Now, if I go and reread it, on the same reasons I fave'd it, I would give it a 6/10 because it isn't horrible, but does need looked into still, and has that potential. It would serve as a decent story, but I agree that a rewrite would help it tremendously
Question, do you use Google Docs?
507395 No I do not. Can't. Any work I get done is on library computers, and I cannot use it on them.
507397
Why can't you use it on them? Sounds kinda odd to me, to be honest.
Would you even be able to open it up on them?
As saddening as this is, I will wait with revered patience until the revised chapters of your story come out
Writing is an enormous thing to undertake. And it can be very overwhelming at times. Hiatus for revision is really your decision, but I would advise against it. The key to improving is, in my experience, not revision, but rather taking what you learn and trying to implement it in new chapters. Your worst enemy as a writer is your inner editor, a demon from the fires of hell whose soul purpose is to say that you aren't good enough. I know I've given my share of feedback, but I never meant it to be anywhere near overwhelming. I'd say take it one step at a time.
507251
Ouch. Sorry if we took the wind outta your sails...
Believe me, I know it can sting to get a lot of feedback, even if it's helpful. But I promise my only goal is to help everyone I comment to be their very best. Maybe I can put my money where my mouth is by offering some assistance with that question above.
The best way to imagine Showing vs. Telling is to picture a Narrator speaking over a play or TV show or movie.
If you're Showing with your writing, the characters say and do things, and the Narrator is silent. If you're Telling, the Narrator speaks to the audience and directly explains or states or describes things while the characters on "stage" do nothing. A little Telling now and then saves time and makes for fast and easy exposition, but too much can make a story feel flat. Of course, Show TOO much and you get bogged down in details or risk Purple Prose. It's a balance you'll learn to strike as you write more and more.
For example:
SHOWING
Twilight Sparkle paced back and forth in the library's main room with short, tense strides, pausing every third pass to peer up at the cuckoo clock hung up on the wall. When the mechanical bird sprang out and cooed out three o'clock, she skidded to a halt and growled through clenched teeth.
"Two HOURS, Rainbow Dash!" she shouted at the empty room, stomping a hoof for emphasis. "UHHGH! You said you'd be right back!"
TELLING
Twilight Sparkle felt annoyed and impatient because Rainbow Dash was extremely late coming back to the library from running a brief errand. She was getting angrier and angrier with her.
Hope that helps!
If writing is something you enjoy doing, never ever stop!
507848 No, neither of you took the wind out of my sails. In fact, both of you gave a much needed heatlthy breeze. I am not discouraged by what you told me, rather, it encourages me. Both of you had pretty much the same things to say. I take what feedback I recieve, and use it a cannon to propel me forward. I will come back, and this will be much better for it.
That does help a lot. The only way I improve in anything is to do it. I learn by doing. So, this means a LOT pratice writing like this is in my future.
Y'know, its funny. Before I started this story, not only did I not have any writing experience, I hated writing. I DESPISED it! Now, I love writing! I have no plans on ever stopping.
507480 Thank you. Your patience will be rewarded, with a much better written story.
507592 I have been doing exactly that. I have been taking what I have learned, and using it. However, before I go on and write future chapters, I want to master a new writing style. My choice to put my story on hiatus was not an easy one for me to make. I thought about it long and hard. I came to the conclusion that if I want my story to be as good as it possibly can be, I need to master a few things, before I do anything more. I know I have potential, it is just a matter of getting that potential in me polished, rahter than rough around the edges. I sometimes have the tedency to be a perfectionist, and this is kinda of one of those times.
508381 I totally understand. I've got a few stories that I've put on hiatus so long that they've been abandoned.
Sounds fair; I myself have had to do that with one of my stories. I'll keep an eye out for the updated version!
508577 Thanks!
I would appreciate it if you would still read the chapters as they are now, so I can hear what you think of them. If you have time, that is.
508579 Sounds good!
507403 Because of the fact that I have to downlaod Drive to use it, I cannot. Library computers do not allow anything to be downloaded, so that is why I cannot use it.
518257
I don't have Drive downloaded...
518280 When I tried to use Google Docs, it said that I had to have it downloaded.
518283
Maybe it could be because I use chrome? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/shrug_Derpy_Hooves.png
Hmm, maybe not, I can use it on my phone without the app....
When was the last time you tried?
518292 Trying it right now.
I CAN use it. Just did not understand what to do.
Sometimes, the most obvious of things escape me...
518294
Well, issue resolved? dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Octavia.png
518297 I think/hope so. When I get it more figured out, you will be the first person I share it with.
518301
Sounds good! If you have a question, ask. I am still learning more about it, but I know enough to use it pretty well.