Story Review - "The Times of Good-bye." · 10:20pm Mar 10th, 2018
I'd like to leave a review of this very thought provoking tale, "The Times of Good-bye" by KaranDash.
Broadly, the tale takes a look at what Princess Twilight Sparkle goes through as one of the unpleasant aspects of her alicorn nature exposes itself: immortality, and the passage of time reflected in those she cares for, as one by one, they slip away due to accident, disease and time itself. Much as in real life, the various nature of the losses strikes Twilight unprepared, and her struggles to come to grips with the feelings and emotions that arise each time.
Life does not come with an owner's manual. It is the most brutal "on the job training" any of us ever get, and many times there are no optimal solutions. We learn as we go, and sometimes the lessons don't always help. This is reflected very well as Twilight faces down a gamut of responses, and her conversations with Celestia and Discord stand out as diametric opposites in both their imparting of knowledge to her, and her receipt of it. One very understated encounter, and for my part the most emotional, is the quiet discussion between Twilight and Shining Armor on her birthday. Shining's very real love for his sister comes out clearly, and I think on how underused this depth of his character in both the show and fiction really is. It's done extremely well here, and I recommend the reader pay close attention to it when it comes about.
The story's overall lesson is one brought about by great maturity of mind, and would do well to be remembered. Sir Patrick Stewart in his role as Star Trek's Captain Jean-Luc Picard perhaps summed it up best:
"Someone once told me that time was a predator that stalked us all our lives, but I rather believe that time is a companion who goes with us on the journey, and reminds us to cherish every moment... because they'll never come again."
Technically this was a well written tale, with almost no mistakes. My only gripe (and it's a small one) is that sometimes the characters sounded slightly out of character on occasion, but not very often. As little as it occurred here, it's a quite forgivable offense.
Overall rating: 10/10. A hearty well done!
Sorry for taking so long to comment. I've been busy. It's 2 AM but I wrote replying to this review as the last item of my "to do" list for today and I just have to complete that list everyday.
First of all, thank you for reading my fanfic and for reviewing.
I'll address your criticism first. That's a criticism that I've received from a few readers. I haven't watched the show in a long time. I left at season 4. Also, some of the characters (like glimmer) are completely unknown and I had to do a bit of research. Maybe that's why they may come across to some readers as out of character. My excuse is that the story begins about 14 years after the show, which justifies any changes in personality. I'm very aware it's an excuse.
It's interesting. Shining Armor's part was just a way to close the family aspect of Twilight and I decided to write it when the story was very advanced, yet many people found that it was the best part of the fic. It has made some readers cry. I honestly didn't know how to include him and the whole thing was made up as I wrote it. Yet it seemed to work very well.
It's interesting that you point out the differences between Celestia and Discord without mentioning which one you prefer. Most people choose. Celestia in particular is seen as the villain by many, even though I didn't intend for her to be that way.
You did get the message I wanted to convey. I'm not surprised since I know your real age and I guess, like myself, you must have witnessed the loss of loved ones in your or other families and what the experience is like. I like the quote you posted a lot. Having been through a recent loss myself as well as having a yuge earthquake recently, it's a refreshing message.
Thank you again for your review and thank you for giving my story such a high grade. I know it's a fanfic, but I tried to do my best and I learned a lot about writing in the process.