Peek of sneak · 3:23am Sep 17th, 2017
An excerpt from a coming short story, Aggro-Culture: The Story of the Brave Little Bug. Jitterbug, daughter of Junebug, goes off on an adventure of awesome epicness. But first, she has to gather supplies, because she read that adventurers do that sort of thing first.
No matter what her mother said, Jitterbug wasn’t about to go digging in the garden. Of all the chores she had to do, the working in the garden was the worst. The dirt was dirty, there were slugs and other gross, icky things lurking under every leaf, and there was a smell. Something about the smell of the garden on a hot summer day was just unpleasant and nasty. The smell of hot vegetation wasn’t too bad, but when combined with the stench of dung and hot earth—blech!
Moving with as much stealth as possible, the little pigtailed filly crept into the kitchen, her pigtails bobbing, and her face was scrunched into an intense scowl of concentration as she planned her clever heist. Tilting her head back, she looked up, hoping to catch a glimpse of what she was after. Atop the tallest tower of the gleaming white mighty fortress of the Might Land of Kitchen, there was a priceless treasure: a cookie jar in the shape of a crowing rooster was up on top of the fridge, kept out of her reach.
It just wasn’t fair!
But today she was going to be triumphant, because she had something that her mother, Junebug, didn’t have. Jitterbug had magic, if only she could just coax a little bit out of her stubby horn. Getting the cookie jar down was quite a challenge, but getting it down without shattering it on the floor was the Epic Quest of Epicness of Epic Proportions. Or something. A devious smile appeared upon the pigtailed filly’s face when she realised that she was thinking comic-book thoughts again.
Forgetting that she was supposed to be stealthy, she began humming to herself, and then burst out into song, singing the sort of music that her mother had forbade her to listen to. The good kind of music, awesome music, the most awesomest of awesomosity—music that was made of Rainbow Dash grades of awesomeness.
“When I see what I want, I'm going to take it… if it's against some law you can bet I'll break it! My need to feed gives me the will to survive… I gotta find it fast… to keep me alive!”
The sudden burst of good mood proved beneficial, and the magic came easy. She felt it, welling up inside of her, a great and wonderful sensation of ticklish glee. A shower of glittery sparks burst from the tip of her stubby, chubby horn and dazzled her eyes, making it difficult to see. But this didn’t stop her, no, she persisted and maintained her concentration, even going as far as sticking out her tongue to aid her in her task.
Summoning a bubble of magic, she willed it to float up to the very top of the shiny white tower where her much-wanted treasure was stored. The glittery blobby bubble of light paused for a moment, not wanting to go higher, and Jitterbug was forced to wonder if it was afraid of heights. Well, if it was, it was just going to have to get over it, because she needed rations to go on her adventure. Straining, she willed it to go higher, but her magic was strongest when it was closest.
Standard disclaimer. Of course it needs editing, it is in a raw form, duh! Other than any obvious errors or typos, tell me what you think!
Adorable Filly Alert! Steel your hearts, lads!
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I'm trying cap'n!
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Yeah, very wonderful kid-centered. Might want to strike one of those two 'pigtail' references that you have right next to each other.
Come to think of it, I need to give you a little inspiration credit for Drifting Down the Lazy River. You write those epic tales of kids doing what we adults have forgotten are epic adventure. (hug)
I forget was junebug in a previous story?
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Actually, I am following the established rule of repetition in children's literature, as established by Lewis Carroll, Astrid Lindgren, William Steig, Roald Dahl, and many others. Certain details get over mentioned because it establishes a value of whimsy in the reader. It feels a bit clumsy at times, but there are moments when it does come off as being quite endearing.
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Nope! This is her debut!
She's not shy.