Mariusioannesp Reviews: "Hard to Say Anything"

WARNING!!! The following contains SPOILERS for the latest MLP episode “Hard to Say Anything”

Now, without further a-Big-Mac-and-Sugar-Belle-sitting-in-a-tree-K-I-S-S-I-N-G-do, here is my review of “Hard to Say Anything”.

The Cutie Mark Crusaders find it suspicious that Big McIntosh has been making an inordinate number of apple deliveries to Our Town. They follow him and learn from spying on him that he’s got a crush on Sugar Belle of all ponies. The CMC encourage Big Mac to be admit his feelings to her, but it looks like another colt named Feather Bangs might also be after Sugar Belle’s affections. The CMC once again try to help Big Mac in his love life, and expectedly there are disastrous results. Will the CMC learn what true love really means?

So what’s the verdict?

This was a pretty awkward episode but, it was still pretty fun. That's pretty much what romance is. Awkward butt fun... I mean, awkward, but fun.

So yeah, I liked it.

We begin with Apple Bloom at Sweet Apple Acres receiving a visit from Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo. This is the third episode now where the CMC are the center of attention or at least close to it. Anywho, Sweetie Belle wanted to show them a box of costumes from the talent show that Rarity found while cleaning up her boutique. Do they mean the talent show from “The Show Stoppers” way, way back in Season 1. I don’t recognize these as part of their costumes from that time though. Well, Scootaloo thinks they might be useful if they ever have to help a pony put on a play or need to make a quick escape. Then, Apple Bloom notices Big McIntosh preparing a rather large apple delivery. He’s making another delivery to Our Town, you know Starlight Glimmer’s old village. Apparently, Big Mac’s been making deliveries there a lot, and he’s rather guarded and blushy over it.

Sweetie and Scootaloo instantly sense that something is up. Though the best they can come up with is that Big Mac is training for a marathon, and Apple Bloom speculates he’s picking up broccoli and wants to get away from the smell. Scootaloo further speculates that Big Mac could be a spy on a mission to thwart a villain with an apple cannon. Sweetie suggests just asking him. However, Scootaloo notes how shifty he was acting before. He’s unlikely to tell them. Scootaloo instead suggest they put on these costumes and spy on him. Scootaloo puts on a rainbow afro and calls herself Agent Rainbowhead. Sweetie puts on Groucho glasses and calls herself Shimmering Spectacles, a librarian with a mysterious past. Apple Bloom puts on a pirate hat and calls herself a Spy-rate.

It’s like they’re Charlie’s Angels.

Charlie’s Angels. That’s a show I’ve never seen.

Anyway, Big Mac starts going off on his delivery, and the CMC sneak on board his apple cart. While hiding in the cart, Sweetie is reading a book that she suddenly has for some reason.

When they arrive at their destination, Apple Bloom tells them to act like apples, which doesn’t make any sense. They just huddle together barely covered in apples, but Big Mac is so lovestruck, he doesn’t even notice.

Lovestruck? With whom I ponder? Sweetie pulls out some binoculars they suddenly have with them and observes Big Mac talking to Sugar Belle. Of course, Sweetie doesn’t know who she is and neither does Scootaloo as they’ve never been to Our Town before. However, Apple Bloom recognizes her as Applejack told her about her bakery. She figures that’s the reason she keeps ordering apples. Sweetie figures that’s the end of it as well. Scootaloo though insists it can’t be that simple, and so they continue their reconnaissance.

They observe Big Mac talking to Sugar Belle. Sugar Belle appreciates seeing Big Mac again and all the apples he’s delivered for her. She likes the opportunity of making all kinds of apple-themed baked goods but laments the lack of room on her display shelves. There’s also quite a bit of googly eyes and a bit of touching.



Sweetie picks up on this and concludes that Big Mac has a crush on Sugar Belle.

Once Big Mac leaves Sugar Belle’s bakery, Apple Bloom and her fellow CMCs reveal themselves. After reminding her friends of Big Mac’s shyness, Apple Bloom asks him point blank if he has a crush on Sugar Belle. He responds “Eeyup.” Well, that was easier than they expected. Apple Bloom is rather excited that Big Mac’s got his first crush. Hold on a sec. This is Big Mac’s first crush. Isn’t rather old to never have crushed before? Scootaloo also wonders how this is his first crush given what happened the last time with Cheerilee. Sweetie notes that it probably doesn’t count when you’re tricked into drinking a love potion. Big Mac rather gruffly agrees. It seems Big Mac hasn’t quite gotten over that. But hey, you probably wouldn’t get over someone using a love potion on you to ship you with some random person. Anywho, Sugar Belle doesn’t know yet, and the CMC encourage Big Mac to tell her how he feels because it seems she likes him back. Big Mac decides to do so. I once told a girl I liked her, and it didn’t work out well at all. Big Mac picks a flower, fixes his mane, and is about to say it when suddenly he’s interrupted by this gentlecolt with a much more impressive bouquet and mane. See, admitting your feelings never works out.



Justin Bieber is that you? Why are you a pony?

No, it’s not quite Justin Bieber. This is Feather Bangs, and he is also pursuing Sugar Belle in a romantic fashion. With a name like Feather Bangs, I kind of expected him to be a Pegasus. Apparently, his Feather name is a reference to how feathery his bangs are. Fun fact. In case you forgot, Sugar Belle is portrayed by Rebecca Shoichet, Twilight Sparkle’s singing voice and the voice behind Equestria Girls’ Sunset Shimmer. Feather Bangs here is portrayed by Vincent Tong, the voice behind Equestria Girls’ Flash Sentry. It’s almost like Flash Sentry and Starlight Glimmer trying to get together again.

So, the CMC realize that Sugar Belle is also kind of into this Feather Bangs. Big Mac is left dejected by this and considers making his way home. He can’t compete with Feather Bangs because he can juggle and has cheesy lines. He’s even got his own groupies.

They’re like those hangers-on Gaston had in Beauty and the Beast.

For Feather Bangs is the Gaston of this episode.

No pony flips hair like Feather Bangs
Has got flair like Feather Bangs
No pony juggles these balls though the air like Feather Bangs

But enough of that. The CMC assure Big Mac that they’re going to help him win Sugar Belle’s heart. Big Mac insists on not involving any love potions. Thankfully, the CMC have learned their lesson from the whole “Heart and Hooves Day” incident. Instead, Sweetie suggests they go by the book of fairy tales she was reading on the way there.

If they do exactly as the book says, they’re guaranteed a happy ending. Applying Disney-esque fairy tales to real life. Yeah, that’ll definitely work.

First, they try rescuing a damsel-pony-in-distress. Unfortunately, there isn’t a dragon available for Big Mac to fight as Spike isn’t there, not that he’s particularly menacing anyway. Instead of waiting for Sugar Belle to find herself in a scary situation, the CMC decide to bring the danger to her. Scootaloo wearing the rainbow afro and the Groucho glasses is going to pretend to steal Sugar Belle’s bag, and Big Mac is going to swoop in and stop her. This almost works out until Scootaloo trips on a rock, causing her to drop the bag. Before Big Mac can catch it, Feather Bangs somehow catches it and returns it to Sugar Belle. So, that’s a bust.

Next, they dress up Big Mac like a prince so that he can wake Sugar Belle while she’s taking a nap in a hammock from “a sleeping curse with a magical kiss”. Then, they can ride off into the sunset. What is this, Once Upon A Time? Do the CMC realize there’s no sleeping curse here? It’s not like I see Regina around.

Look how uncomfortable Big Mac looks dressed like a prince.

Perhaps he’d be more comfortable as an alicorn princess.

Or as Orchard Blossom.

You know what? Let’s not make this more wrong than it already is. This is pretty wrong already. Let’s not add crossdressing to the non-consensual kissing. At least Big Mac seems to be aware that this is kind of wrong while the CMC are blissfully unaware of it. I hope they learn that from this escapade as they apparently did in “Heart and Hooves Day”.

Of course, this doesn’t work out either. Before Sugar Belle realizes what Big Mac was about to do, Feather Bangs rolls up and whisks her away in a pony-drawn carriage to ride off into their metaphorical sunset. So that’s a bust too.

Thirdly, they decide to have Big Mac write and sing a song for Sugar Belle because every great love story hinges on a romantic musical number. My question is how do love stories hinge on musical numbers when they’re in a book? Nonetheless, they get a song ready and practiced and surprise Sugar Belle in her bakery. Big Mac’s song is part of a greater song called “Battle for Sugar Belle”. Big Mac's part’s pretty good. It’s country-inspired, and I’m one of the rare few who rather like country music.


Big Mac’s singing is impressive, but this isn’t too surprising. Remember he did sing as a member of the Pony Tones way back in Season 4’s “Filli Vanilli” and as Orchard Blossom in Season 5’s “Brotherhooves Social”. Sugar Belle is confused by all this but she looks like she’s into it.


But of course, this song is a battle, and a battle requires an adversary. That adversary is Feather Bangs. Once again out of nowhere, Feather Bangs shows up with his own part of the song that’s more in that pop/hip-hop/EDM melange style that’s kind of popular these days with the youths.

I take it back. Feather Bangs is Justin Bieber.

He also has higher production values with his own back-up dancers and groupies and probably some keys somewhere.








Where did all these ponies even come from?!

This epic romantic song battle in pony history comes to a screeching halt when Big Mac and Feather Bangs end up destroying Sugar Belle’s display shelves.


Sugar Belle of course isn’t happy about this at all. She chides them for thinking she’d be into this kind of nonsense because clearly they don’t know her at all.

Everyone is forced to leave the bakery all dejected.

Soon afterwards, the CMC are looking around everywhere for Big Mac as he’s gone off to mope.

It looks like Party Favor and Night Glider have something going on too.

Anyway, they find Big Mac with the storybook under a tree. Apple Bloom apologizes for things not working out. Sweetie can’t understand it as grand romantic gestures work in the fairy tales. Big Mac though points out that Sugar Belle is a real pony and not a fairy tale princess, hitting the nail square on the head. Apple Bloom realizes that what they should have been thinking of is what would have meant a lot to Sugar Belle. She then throws the storybook away. That’s the first smart thing they’ve done today. Big Mac realizes exactly what he must do, but he’s going to need the CMC’s help to execute his plan.

Soon enough, Scootaloo is wearing the Groucho glasses and keeping Sugar Belle distracted by introducing herself as Shimmering Spectacles, a librarian with a mysterious past.

Hay, that’s Sweetie Belle’s alias Scootaloo! Sugar Belle seems to recognize her, but goes along with it anyway. Scootaloo tries everything she can to keep Sugar Belle distracted while Big Mac and Apple Bloom are hard at work in the bakery. Eventually, Scootaloo can keep her away no longer. Sugar Belle is not too happy to see Big Mac in her bakery, but then she sees that he built her a much larger set of display shelves. Now she has twice as much room for her baked goods!

She calls this gesture the sweetest thing anypony has ever done for her. Big Mac can’t even form a coherent response, but Sugar Belle understands that her likes her. And she likes him too. Awwa. Take note my fellow gentlebronies. Sometimes women just want to see that you’ve been listening to them. Though this is the rare occasion where that can be done by fixing something, which is what men are naturally inclined to do. Usually, women want you to share in burdens emotionally.

What?! This is obscene!

Ah yes, that’s better.

Movin’ right along. Apple Bloom calls this the most romantic thing ever as she should. Sugar Belle then recognizes the CMC and realizes they’ve been with Big Mac this whole time. Apple Bloom explains how she’s Big Mac’s sister and how she and her friends were the ones who made Big Mac to all that stuff in an attempt to impress her. They however have learned the lesson that romance isn’t about impressing someone, but doing something special for the one you love, or like a lot as the case may be. Well, that’s a lesson I can certainly stand behind. So, the CMC leave to give Big Mac and Sugar Belle some privacy, he he. That’s when they run into Feather Bangs again, trying to serenade Sugar Belle while holding a phonograph over his head.

Why does this look familiar?

Ah yes. It’s a visual reference to the film Say Anything…, which is also referenced by the episode’s title. Though it’s kind of surprising Feather Bangs is the one pulling the John Cusack here.

Say Anything… That’s another film I’ve never seen.

The CMC inform Feather Bangs that he’s too late and Sugar Belle has already made her choice. Though they inform him that he has three not-so-secret-admirers standing right behind him. However, Feather Bangs doesn’t even know what to say them and asks the CMC. Apparently, Feather Bangs can mane-flip, write poetry, and juggle, but can’t even bring himself to actually talk to pony. I see. He’s one of those guys we’ve seen before who’s all talk but can’t actually do anything. The CMC agree to help him out since they might be there for a while. That’s because Big Mac is a pony and his saddle is waiting for Sugar Belle to come and jump on it.

What is wrong with me?

This episode was written by Becky Wangberg, a new writer on MLP. She’s previously written for The Fairly Oddparents and Bunsen Is a Beast, which I believe is Butch Hartman’s latest televisual project. Interestingly enough, Ms. Wangberg isn’t the first new writer to have previously written for The Fairly Oddparents. Whitney Wetta, one of the writers for “A Flurry of Emotions”, had also written for The Fairly Oddparents. It’s interesting MLP has been picking up some of writers from The Fairly Oddparents. Rumor has it, the show has effectively been canceled since it’s been moved from Nickelodeon proper to Nicktoons TV. But Nickelodeon’s loss is Discovery Family’s gain. I know The Fairly Oddparents has been deteriorating drastically over the years, but that’s probably not completely the writers’ fault. Perhaps in a better environment provided by MLP, they could produce quality work. And certainly Ms. Wangberg and Ms. Wetta have both done a pretty good job in their respective episodes. Anyway, since this is Ms. Wangberg’s first episode, there’s no way to tell just yet how she stands out writing-wise. The romance angle might have something to do with it given it’s not a topic MLP delves into very often.

Speaking of romance, this episode marks the first time established characters have entered into a relationship. It doesn’t really count as a ship becoming canon as SugarMac wasn’t much of a ship. It was even pretty rare among crackships. It was as cracked a crackship you could ship before now but whatever. Romance has never a big focus before on MLP. Using Big Mac for this kind of episode avoids having to use any of the Mane 6 or any of the other primary characters. (Though I still would love to see an episode where two of the Mane 6 compete for some stallion’s affections. That’s almost what happens here, but Feather Bangs isn’t an established character yet.) I think this is also the first confirmed mixed-race canon couple, given that Big Mac is an Earth Pony and Sugar Belle’s a Unicorn. (Shining Armor and Cadance might not exactly count as Unicorns and Alicorns are close enough, but technically speaking Cadance was born a Pegasus.) I wonder if they’re going to keep going with this. Perhaps Big Mac and Sugar Belle will be the next wedding the series features.

What of Cheerilee and Marble Pie though? Many episodes following “Heart and Hooves Day” quietly toy with the idea that there were some genuine feelings between Big Mac and Cheerilee. “Hearthbreakers” seems to indicate there might have been something between Big Mac and the equally laconic Marble Pie. This thing with Sugar Belle comes as far out from left field as you could come. You know, the MLP comic “Zen and the Art of Gazebo Repair” depicts mares falling head over hooves in love with Big Mac and him not noticing at all on his quest for nails. Maybe there’s something to that in MLP proper itself. Perhaps mares feel an irresistible pull towards him.

Big Mac gets all the mares.

Big Mac has the kavorka!

Big Mac speaks quite a bit in this episode. He also spoke quite in his last romantic outing “Heart and Hooves Day” but most of it was nonsense. This is obviously necessary as he’s at the center of this episode’s plot. However, we have been seeing Big Mac speak more than his typical “Eeyup” and “Nope” over the past couple of seasons. Big Mac might just be growing himself and opening himself up more.

The beginning of this episode makes it clear that the CMC learned their lesson from “Heart and Hooves Day”. That is both continuity and development. Yet, the CMC still manage to be responsible for part of Big Mac’s romantic troubles in this episode. Some things never change.

Where did Feather Bangs come from? Was he always a denizen of Our Town or are there ponies now moving to Our Town?

This episode illustrates the hazards of a Disney fairy tale view of romance. Sweetie Belle’s storybook clearly illustrates many of the tropes present in Disney’s film adaptations rather than the original storybook fairy tales. The connection is also made given how Feather Bangs sort of parallels Gaston from Beauty and the Beast. This is something MLP has already done in the past, way back in Season 1’s finale “Best Night Ever”. Though their attempts to apply these tropes in real life still came off as kind of cringey though. And trust me when I say I don’t use the term “cringey” lightly.

As for what I didn’t like, I find it quite odd that Big Mac seems rather old, but this is his first crush. How does that work? It might say something about how introverted he is, but that doesn’t sound healthy if it’s to that extent. And what of that thing he had going on with Marble Pie in “Hearthbreakers”? How was that not a crush? Does it not count somehow? Surprisingly enough, the CMC are kind of more of the focus than Big Mac is. That seems odd since this is an episode about Big Mac’s love life. Also, their fairy tale approach is kind of bizarre for fillies who are supposed to be growing up. “Forever Filly” from a few weeks ago was all about how Sweetie Belle was growing up, but she’s the catalyst for their plan to do as this storybook says. Then again, that’s not to say you can’t be an adult who’s into fairy tales and Disney movies. (I myself went through a phase in college where I was into old school fairy tales. You know, Grimm Brothers, Hans Christian Anderson, Charles Perrault, stuff like that.) I guess you could say that the CMC learning that these romantic Disney fairy tale tropes don’t work in real life is part of growing up. It seems like something they should have outgrown by now to me.

Overall, “Hard to Say Anything” was all kinds of awkward butt fun. At least if that’s what you’re into. It’s nice to see romance explored once in awhile on MLP. It’s also nice to see Big Mac grow a little. And the CMC were great too.

What did you all think of “Hard to Say Anything”?

God bless you. God bless America. And God bless Equestria.

Comments

[Doctor Perseus]

Overall, I liked this episode as well. Awkward, but fun nonetheless.

The Feather Bangs/Gaston comparison is somewhat fitting. Though Feather Bangs isn’t really a jerk like Gaston was.

I also thought of Once Upon a Time when they mentioned the sleeping curse. Man, it’s weird how the sleeping curse is now more of a Once thing than a Sleeping Beauty thing. Probably because they had at least five of them.