Something I want to show you.

It's an old (probably late 80s or early 90s) humorous song about tourists having a holiday in Malta. Descriptions are exaggerated for humour. And yes, I recognise the place in the photos taken, Marsalforn and its surroundings.

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Lyrics:

Malta, we love Malta!
These are the things we'd alter.
Malta, we love Malta,
These are the things we'd alter.

Now you've not been in Malta for very long,
Before you notice some things seem wrong
So before we go on with the show,
This is our very own Maltese calypso: (refrain)

Now the Maltese people are very nice,
If you hire a car, you better think twice.
Oh the Maltese people are very nice,
If you hire a car, you better think twice.

I hired one the first day I got here
With no brakes, no clutch, and I can't change gear.
I went around to get my money back,
But the man says, don't worry 'cause they're all like that. (refrain)

Now I took a taxi, had a terrible fright.
He drove on the left, he drove on the right.
Oh I took a taxi, had a terrible fright.
He drove on the left, he drove on the right.

I asked the driver, can this be true?
Does everyone in Malta drive like you?
He turned around, and said we got it made,
In Malta, everybody drives in the shade. (refrain)

Now the Maltese girls are very fine,
With dark skin and eyes that shine.
Oh, the Maltese girls are very fine,
With dark skin and eyes that shine.

I asked a girl to come out with me till late,
So I picked her up about a half past eight,
Her mother said, now have a real good time,
But she better be home by half past nine! (refrain)

Now the first thing that made me very cross,
Was everybody drives like Stirling Moss.
Oh the first thing that made me very cross,
Was everybody drives like Stirling Moss.

The buses here are a bit of a joke,
Old and green, and make a lot of smoke.
The smallest book in the world, we're told,
That's the Maltese highway code. (refrain)

Now when you leave Malta, you'll be very sad -
'Cause things over here aren't really that bad.
Oh When you leave Malta, you'll be very sad -
'Cause Things over here aren't really that bad.

We got the sunshine, we got the sea,
And not long ago we got the colour TV.
And when you come back, well you never know -
Someone might have filled up all the holes in the roads.

Malta, we love Malta,
These are the things we'd alter.
Malta, we love Malta,
There's nothing that we'd alter!

Comments

[Celestias Paladin]

Guess the question is, which are exaggeration?

Funny enough... off Wikipedia I found a copy of the Malta Highway Code

[La Vallett1]

4211008 Until recently, Malta was a bit rugged. There are still bits here and there that need fixing, but overall I say that things are really improving. Though I may be a bit biased because the party I support is in the government.

[Celestias Paladin]

4211030
Rugged is a matter of prospective though I have been on some rather piss-poor roads out in the boondocks of Bastrop County