Some OCs Review Hearthbreakers · 10:43pm Oct 25th, 2015
What is that supposed to mean?
You tend to get a bit… intense when you want to investigate a mystery concerning this show. Thank god we started these reviews after Season 4… the damn box would have had you awake for hours!
I don’t get THAT intense…
Quick! Have a Snickers! You aren’t you when you’re hungry! Is that how that works? Did I do it right?
I do NOT get intense! I DON’T!
Flicker, the war god is telling you that you are being too loud. That is a sign you are being too loud.
But… I… I can’t help it! This show’s calendar makes no sense! First we get the Summer Sun Celebration, which seems to be their 4th of July and New Years rolled into one. Then after spending time in Summer we move right into Winter… no stories about Winter though, as we see it wrapped up into Spring. Then, two episodes later, we are in Fall! But the next episode we are back into Spring. But no Summer Sun Celebration… instead it is time for the Gala! And apparently a few weeks after that we are back into Fall and it is Nightmare Night which is then followed by the Sisterhooves Social, which is clearly Spring as well. Spring sticks around and then we skip Fall again and it is time for Winter and Hearth’s Warming Eve! Winter stays for about 5 minutes and we get Spring again with Hearts and Hooves Day and the annual Dragon Migration. Spring lasts FOREVER (or the length of a season) and we are back to the Summer Sun Celebration. That means in one year we got one Summer, two Winter, four Springs, and two Falls. It makes no sense!
Unless Equestria has a 9 Season year.
We are getting nine seasons of the show!?!?
No Mary… well, we could if the bronies keep the show going, but that isn’t what I meant. I mean that Equestria might have multiple seasons. We know that the sun and the moon have no real control over the seasons themselves, just the length of the days. The Weather Ponies make it their job to control the weather and seasons have to be wrapped up by the ponies themselves. The sun doesn’t melt the snow, the leaves don’t fall on their own, so on. Thus you can’t think of the seasons like they do in the human world. Instead, we must think of them based on what the ponies can do and that leads me to my Multi-Season theory. Now then, let me put on my Flicker Flame hat… there we go… and I will begin.
Basically, seasons in Equestria operate like the seasons in ‘Game of Thrones’: They have no set length of time and can last very long or very short. Thus we can get multiple winters with one lasting only a week and another lasting maybe a month. Summer is the sole season that only comes once and thus is celebrated by the ponies as being special.
But the math still doesn’t work! Fluttershy says clearly in ‘Tanks for the Memories’ that Winter lasts months.
It made Rainbow Dash cry! And Applejack cry on the inside!
. And in the second year we get Summer, Winter, Spring, but now the Gala is in this Spring instead of second Spring, head into second Winter, and next week it is Fall!
Well, ScareMaster was suppose to come before second Winter…
Maybe we see the episodes out of order?
But the show is so careful with references and continuity! How could they-
Pegasus Doctor Whooves.
…okay, so the writers just do whatever they want. Got it. I’m better now.
Can we talk about the episode now? Please????
Yeah, about that... I really didn't like this episode.
But... but... it's Christmas! Or Hearth's Warming Eve! You can't be a Grinch about this, Tydal!
Well, he is a green grumpy creature that tends to look down at the colorful beings that live near him.
Hey! I'm half green! I am also half gray.
How can you not love this episode?
Well, I suppose 'hate' is a strong word. Let me put it like this: I think this episode should have aired sooner.
In the season?
In the SERIES. It feels like a Season 1 story in a lot of places.
But there is so much good in it! So much new information that fleshes out the universe! You love that.
Of course I do. You love the cute stuff, Flicker likes to theorize, and I'm into world building. That's our bit. But I also care about the plot and I think this one is sorely lacking.
Okay, why don't we tell you what we liked, you tell us what bugged you, and then we'll see where we go from there.
Sounds fair.
Alright, so first off let's talk about Twilight's castle. Can it PLEASE be Hearth's Warming Eve every day? The castle just looks so much better when decorated. It was so cold and empty in earlier episodes but here it just seemed more inviting.
That is my problem with Twilight's castle: for a place that is supposed to be the home of the 'alicorn of friendship' it isn't very personable. Silver Quill mentioned in his review that the castle feels like the lair of a villain rather than a hero and I have to agree. What they did here was a really nice touch but I think more could be done. Twilight was Ponyville's librarian so I think they should have continued her role of being a figure in the community and had her open her castle up as basically a rec center. She'd have a library and places to play games and a pool, things like that. Make it that the Castle of Friendship is a place the ponies of Ponyville can come and just have fun.
And they could have a juice bar where the Power Rangers hang out.
And practice our martial arts!
I also love all the new details they gave us about Hearth's Warming Eve. When it was first introduced it was pretty much a Christmas rip off but now we are seeing it become it's own holiday. Special treats, dolls of those that live in the house, the raising of the flag... it's all so cool! Really gives a lot for fan fic writers to play around with! And I so want to see what dolls the others made! I imagine Rarity's is very elegant, like one of those Precious Moment figurines you'll see in a curio cabinet, while Rainbow Dash's must have all these cool features like Kung Fu Hoof Grip!
I do want to know the story behind those dolls. I mean, what started it? You get the sense that there are different traditions when it comes to them; Twilight and Spike act like they made their own dolls but Applejack made it sound like an elder makes them for a child and passes it down to them. And the Pies make new ones every year. Do they have to be hoof made or can you go to a store and getting a starter kit like those make-it-yourself stockings? Is there a certain size they need to be? Are there families where they make each others dolls or do you make your own? Can dolls be reused, as in Applejack might be using a doll her great great grandma used but with different accessories?
I'm still stuck wondering if that gaudy train is the only one in Equestia.
Actually there is a law on the books stating that all our trains need to look like a foal's drawings.
Seriously?
We use pies as weapons... you're still shocked that ponies are a bit eccentric?
Point taken. That said, the train is where my biggest grip with the episode comes in: the predictability. Is there anyone who didn't see what was coming with the Pies and Apples?
I didn't
You don't count!
Okay... yeah, I guessed right away that the Pies would do things differently than the Apples. But that isn't too bad... I mean, you guessed who the villain was in 'Rarity Investigates' and you rank that one of your favorite episodes
Because that episode had enough strong jokes to carry it! It had a different feel than most episodes and felt fresh and new.
What about "The One Where Pinkie Knows"? We all knew the big reveal and that was a good episode.
In that case they were able to put enough twists in to make the story entertaining. 'Hearthbreakers' doesn't'; it falls the 'According To Jim Test'.
The... what now?
According to Jim was a long running sitcom on ABC. It was also incredibly trite. It was like every bad sitcom trope had been distilled, all 'impurities' (aka things that might be original) burned away, until we were left with 100% Proof Cliche. The 'According To Jim Test' is where you remove the names of the main characters' names, replace them with characters from a banal sitcom, and it would feel like that was an episode from that series. Allow me to demonstrate: In 'Hearthbreakers' Chandler Bing and his family go to visit Joey's family for the holidays only to find they celebrate things differently. Chandler feels his way is best and when he tries to force his traditions into their celebration is causes a major disaster and the family leaves. On the train ride back Chandler realizes how big of a jerk he was and how important those traditions are to his friends and the family returns to make things right. In the end Chandler celebrates as they do but his friends also add a few of his traditions to the mix.
Okay, admittedly the plot was a bit… predictable.
It’s more than that! Okay, listen to this summary and tell me what you think: Pinkie is excited to introduce one of her friends to one of her family members only to find out that their interests aren’t the same.
A good summary of this episode
I was referring to the episode “Maud Pie”. That’s the other problem with this episode: we already got this story in that much superior story. The moment Pinkie and Applejack began to excitedly talk about how their families were similar and would get along so well I knew we were getting a retread of ‘Maud Pie’.
Okay, I'm willing to admit that there were some echos to Maud Pie. But speaking of Maud...am I the only one that wants someone to do a story where Maud solves crimes using her rock-observing powers?
Ooooh! And she has a whole team that helps her out! A snarky bug and slime pony, an eccentric artist best friend, and her partner/love interest Steely Booth!
Would be better than this episode.
Okay, okay, Mr. Grumpy Goat-Fish. Let’s focus on non-story elements, okay? Like our re-introduction to the Pie family. I have to say… I really liked them!
Me too. Igneous and Cloudy Pie are both great characters and I can totally see them as Pinkie’s parents. I’m sure some think that Pinkie’s folks should have been partyers like her but I think it makes more sense for her to have stern old-fashion parents. Who else better to control Pinkie than Igneous and Cloudy? And I really like that while they seem old fashion they weren’t rude to the Pies or look down their noses at them. I got the sense that they were much like Granny Smith was: confused at first by the new ideas but accepting of them.
Oh, I just loved them blushing when Granny suggested using their stone to find a special somepony and then totally agreeing with the idea. They could have easily treated her with scorn, getting upset with her using the stone like a dating service, but instead they are completely understanding.
I also think it speaks well on Granny’s part. She could have been shocked that the two of them were ‘forced together by some magic stone’ but instead of assuming that means they have a loveless marriage she pays them a wonderful compliment by showing her own interest in trying it.
And then there is Pinkie's twin sister Marble! Oh, she is just so cute! And I totally ship her with Big Mac now!
Do… ponies get a choice when it comes to their love interests?
N-ope.
Nuh-uh
And finally there is Limestone, the brash member of the Pie family.
And here is where I bring up my final point. I personally think this episode would have been much stronger if they had set Limestone up to be against Applejack and her ideas. I’m not saying they’d be at each other’s throats… I think it would have been interesting to make it more like the Rainbow Dash/Applejack competitive streak, with the two of them constantly trying to prove to the other that their traditions are better and the rest of the two families caught in the middle. Have Limestone preach the Pie was is best, Applejack her way, and have them trying to outdo each other, getting more elaborate and crazy while forgetting what the holiday truly means: family. You could still have Holder’s Boulder fall but have it where both AJ and Limestone try to move it but it takes BOTH families to get it back up. The moral could be the same, that traditions take time and just because one family does something different doesn’t mean that they are wrong.
Well, maybe, but I think the episode was okay as is.
So I guess that, in the end of the day, we are split. Flicker and I enjoyed the episode, you didn’t like it, but we all loved the world building.
I’d say that is fair.
Good! Now I can set about shipping YOU with someone, Tydal! Maybe Gertrude or Gilda… perhaps Limestone? Nah, you need someone sweet and kind! Maybe Fluttershy?
Uh… I have a wife.
That he does!
Sweetheart, you really need to update your avatar pic.
HEY KIDS, WHO WOULD YOU SHIP TYDAL WITH IF HE WEREN’T ALREADY MARRIED? LET US KNOW IN THE COMMENTS!
(Special Thanks to Fieryjoker for letting me use Commander Firebrand and the creator of Flufflepuff for giving me permission a LONG time ago to let me use her)
Pinkie Pie.
she'd be like, "We can hang out!" And he's cool with it, and then three weeks later he suddenly realizes they've been dating the entire time and panic.
I think he and the Chimera from Somepony to watch over me would get along...if it wasn't for the foal eating thing.
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Yeah, that would be an instant trip to Tydal's fanblade.
I swear, NO ONE seems to have noticed that Pinkie and Marble are twins! Pinkie says Marbles is only a few minutes younger than her when introducing her.
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See... I didn't mention it because I'm not sure if Limestone is a few years older or if Pinkie, Lime, and Marble are Triplets (also, could Limestone's first name be Key and thus she is Key Lime Pie?)
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Headcanon accepted.
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I suppose Flicker is like Wario? You won't see him in adventures or fighting stories, but if it's about games and stuff he's all for it?
Let's blame the seasons and stuff to timey wimey ball matters. It seems the season finale will involve comrade Starlight Glimmer playing with time travel. We can blame her for having the Running of the Leaves two episodes after Winter Wrap-Up, and having Twist make an appareance without a cutie mark after her introduction.
Cue fanfics of arranged marriages for Pinkie Pie.
Can I comment on the shipping tease in this episode? I have no problem with the fact that Mac and Marble could be cousins. The problem is that the ship is just so cute and it, along with Fluttershy+Bulk Biceps, make my devotion to my OTP FlutterMac waver.
The fact that at least one of Pinkie's sisters is from her same litter reduces the possibility that my headcanon (that is not serious but I want to use in a silly story) of all of Pie daughters, except Pinkie are fruit of infidelity. But at least the confirmation that the marriage was arranged makes it so infidelity is more believable. But as I said, it's a silly headcanon for a future silly story.
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Flicker Flame is right now a review exclusive character. When I was coming up with the idea for these reviews I knew Tydal was going to be in them 100% (I even toyed with the idea of doing a Tydal exclusive review with me voicing him for videos but decided against that due to my limited knowledge of video recording) but then I began to think of how I could make reviews different and the idea of several characters riffing off each other came to me. Mary Sue was my next choice as she just fit with Tydal so well (and she serves as the ILoveKimPossibleAlot stand-in) and Flicker was created to serve as the Dr. Wolf/Silver Quill/Firebrand stand-in.
Mary is probably the hardest to right because she is the fan girl which is the side of my personality least developed (mostly because I am, well, a man), Flicker next because while he is my theorist side I haven't written him as much, and Tydal tends to just be my opinions with all restraints on anger and emotion removed.