Aug
1st
2012
Chapter 2 Teaser · 3:19pm Aug 1st, 2012
Okay, so I decided I'm going to give a teaser for chapter 2. There is one spot highlighted red, and that needs to be changed.
Please, no comments on how to change stuff. Radon18 is actually my editor now, though if another of you wants to volunteer, I might take the offer. Just depends, really.
If you want, watch these videos from me:
My channel
I'll leave you all with that.
EDIT: Okay, so it seems I wasn't clear. Comments on how to change things for making the story flow better is what I mean. If you spot grammar, point it out. If you think you have a color to fix that one spot, I'd like to hear it.
Not allowed to comment there? Okay. I'll do it here.
By standard practice, contractions are not to be used in narration, but only in dialogue.
263280
Find me the spot, and I can change it.
And I swore I had that set to comment.
263291
What do you mean? I could comment, but I didn't because you said so... ?
Anyways, the first couple of paragraphs have that instance.
263297
Oh, I meant on stuff saying how to change the story to make it flow better, etc. Grammar is fine.
263736
Oh. I could do grammar checks?
263744
I might take you up on that. Radon isn't very good with it, according to him.