My B-Day, Apologise and loneliness

Hello follows and friends, it's been some time.

It's midnight here and it just became my birthday, so I decided to get a few things off my chest and put some thoughts out here for anyone who is listening.

I would like to apologise to all of you out there for my absence and complete lack of progress, you have all patiently waited for content from me, yet I have given nothing. You've have all shown what I consider a kindness by liking, following or even just commenting on one of my stories, yet I have given nothing, I apologise for letting you all down. I'd like to say things will be better and I'll be writing more, but to make such a promise and probably break it would just make me feel like I let you down further, so I'll refrain from doing so.

It occurs to that it's 1 year since I last spoke to any of my friends off this site, probably months since I spoke to anyone on the site. I can't even remember the last I actually spoke to someone who wasn't close family or a shopkeeper scanning my groceries. I've been pretty lonely but, what is there to do? Do try and contact my friends who haven't bothered to talk to me in a year or even so much as reply to a message I send them? Do I try and raise my self confidence and try to make something of myself despite feeling like a talentless piece of shit from the moment I wake up to the moment I fall asleep? What is there to do?

And for those of you who were wondering what the 'important message' was I was talking about sometime ago, you can ask SonicMlpGamerandArtist if you really want to know.

Good night and Good day, people of the world.

Comments

[KelloggsKookieKrisp]

*hugs*

[LightningBass94]

Lol. It's cool, man. Shit happens.

[Lime Overtime]

Hi there
I just found u by accident, and I don't know literally ANYTHING about you (yet), but lemme assure you - u r not talentless. U have 5 stories already and more than 100 followers. That means that you have enough imagination and words in your mind to make stories, enough will power to write them, and that your art is liked by others. If that doesn't mean that you have it, than IDK what does!
Don't worry, things will clear out and they will get better !
P.S. I'd love to meetya and become palls

[Garnet Shield]

I've been waiting on you to reply

[crowscrowcrow]

Good to see you're alive.

You sound like you need something adorable, have this:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2015/7/19/939505__safe_rainbow+dash_animated_upvotes+galore_cute_scootaloo_adorable_snuggling_dashabetes_cute+as+fuck.gif

[UnlicensedBrony]

Happy (belated) birthday, mate! Sorry to hear you're not doing well What you described is all too familiar to me. I suffer from depression too (severely), so I know it's next to impossible to believe that there's anything you could do to make it better. Speaking from experience, it gets better, but you've got to be the one to do something about it.

Do try and contact my friends who haven't bothered to talk to me in a year or even so much as reply to a message I send them? Do I try and raise my self confidence and try to make something of myself despite feeling like a talentless piece of shit from the moment I wake up to the moment I fall asleep?

Those are both good ideas. Depression is different for everyone, but for me, human contact was one of the most important things in my recovery. Things got a little better when I started talking to a doctor about it, better again when I got a job and started hanging out with colleagues, and they were at their best when I started making friends in the local area and spending time with them regularly.

If there was one piece of advice I'd give you, it would be to start small, by spending more time around those close family members. Then maybe try and reach out to your old friends, or even better, look for ways that you might be able to meet new people (brony meetups are an easy choice). Talk to people, do anything remotely enjoyable with them. And don't stress about your writing, that'll come back on its own, once you start making a change.

Or, if all else fails, you can talk to me? I know I'm not particularly interesting, but I like talking to people, and we're mates, aren't we? Hit me up, even if it's just to say "Hey, what's new?" - it'd be cool to hear from you.

Also, and I could be totally wrong here, are you British? (I've literally only just noticed that you say 'mate' and spell 'favourite' correctly) You wouldn't happen to live anywhere in the vicinity of Swindon, would you? Apologies if I've said that before and forgotten, but I just thought it'd be awesome if you did - we could hang out some time!

[fimfic4ever]

Hey everyone, I'd like to thank you all for your comment, apologies for taking a while to reply, but I felt I needed a bit of time before coming back online

3282252
*hugs back* btw nice profile pic, very DBZ

3282272
Hey Bassie, good to see ya again, how have you been since I was away?

3282356
Thanks for the kind words, it's always nice to hear such things, and I'm always up for making new friends

[fimfic4ever]

3282548
Sorry for keeping you waiting, What have you been waiting for me to reply to? I don't recall getting any messages beside this one

3282666
I'm always alive just a little bit some where and it's always nice to have some cute pony pics for the collection

3293967
belated birthdays are fine in my book, and thank you

Thanks for the words of wisdom, I know people say 'things will get better' and sometimes I believe it, but other times it really feels like it's not true.

I know it would probably be good for me to get out more, make new friends and meet up with old ones, but it just seems so hard to put myself out there at times, plus I don't of any brony meet-ups in my area, so I don't even know if that's an option but I guess it worth a try.

I'm very thankful to have you to talk to, I find you interesting and we are of course friends

I'm actually Australian but my parents are British, so there is some cultural influence there, btw I liked how you said I spell them 'correctly' seeing as we both know Americans spell them very 'incorrectly'

I might be traveling to Europe sometime next year, so perhaps we could meet up then

[Garnet Shield]

3316984 I asked you what happened to the blog you were going o post and you never replied

[LightningBass94]

My mom died, and I've been coping with that, so not very well. Let's not talk about that, though. How have you been?

[fimfic4ever]

3317090 Sorry, that was around the time when I was drifting away a lot, even when I was on here I wasn't all here, so I probably meant to reply but got mixed up in things and forgot but anyway, I don't really want to get into the specifics of that here, as I said in the blog you can talk to SonicMlpGamerandArtist about it, or check out a blog she posted around the same time I posted my last blog.

[fimfic4ever]

3317860 Yeah I've read your blogs about it, I was sorry to hear it, and sorry I haven't been there as much as I could have been

As for myself, as you can tell from the blog things aren't going well, still pretty distant from social interactions, or a job of any kind or a girlfriend, but I'm holding on, trying to look forward to the future and hoping to make things better

[Garnet Shield]

3318949 Well about your loneliness you could have talked to me because I'm still here and I still wuv you

[LightningBass94]

3318954 Hey, if you need someone to talk to, you know I'm only a button away. I don't know your situation, but I do know how to be a good listener. Chin up, buddy. Love ya'. *hugs*

[UnlicensedBrony]

3316984 Ah, that explains it then. I was close... sort of Oh awesome! Well if you do end up coming here definitely hit me up and I'll see whether you're anywhere I can get to.