Jun
25th
2015
Review: Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie (1997) · 7:38am Jun 25th, 2015
God is dead and Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie killed him.
I mean, WOW the sheer amount of failure contained in this cinematic atrocity is beyond human comprehension, and can only be viewed while completely and utterly stoned out of one's mind.
The sets look like literal toys, the acting is more wooden then the entire Petrified Forest, and the story is a mind bogglingly incomprehensible mess of...something.
I just...there are no words to properly describe how awful and incomprehensible this film was.
0.5 out of 5
Which do you prefer? This or Age of Ultron?
At least 'Mighty Morphin' Power Ranger The movie' is actually better (For the most part, it still has some problems that you can't over easily. Still, it has a better plot and writing [at least compared to the show at the time], Acting, well since at least most of the main actors appear in turbo, you'll most likely hate the acting as it's actually sub par at best. It may only get a 2* from you if you like it at only, if not, I foresee it being a 1* in your eyes).
What allowed this mess to even garner a 0.5 in the first place? The sheer absurdity of the movie itself or the sheer fact that people actually put money into this flaming mess to allow it to break even.
3180503 at least this had Divatox
3180570 because I reverse a non rating for films that simply can't be given a proper rating.
Since I upload these for the website Letterboxd, and it has a five point scale, I try to actively use it, since if you don't use the star rating, it doesn't show up at all and can imply anything.
So far, I've only left two films unrrated: Federico Fellini's 81/2 and Terry Gilliam's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, both because they were films so wildly different from anything I'd seen that I couldn't farely rate them, hence me leaving the rating slot blank.
Everything else gets actual ratings.
Age of Ultron has a 0.5 while Guardians of the Galaxy has a 5
3180776 the mere fact that it exists, and the simple fact that the website Letterboxd (where I upload all my reviews), doesn't have a 'zero star' rating. If you put zero stars, it simply doesn't show any stars, meaning you can't properly rank the film in comparison to others
So, like Batman and Robin?
Also, if you have to watch a Power Rangers, I'd recommend RPM. It's the one with the best acting and character arcs. At least that I've seen.
0,5!?
Are you insane!?
Give it a big Fat 0!
I have NOT ONCE found a SINGLE POWER RANGERS FAN that LIKED Turbo!
Ironically, it's Japanese Counterpart SAVED Super Sentai, by replacing the Srs Bsns seasons it was doing with a Cartoony, Goofy season about cars, as a breath of fresh air...
The show then tried to make this Season Serious.
....IRONICALLY AGAIN, Much later, the Also-Cars-themed "POwer Rangers RPM" Basically did the exact same thing.... and became one of the memorably BEST Seasons i've ever watched.
AND THOSE CAR-ZORDS HAD GOOGLY EYES.
And it was better then Turbo.
So Fuck Turbo, Fuck writing out Rocky, Fuck that 10 year old, and Fuck throwing away the "Always growing powerful forever" Zeo Powers for "Cool Cars Guys!" ~_~