Three Left Turns Postmortem · 3:24am Sep 23rd, 2014
Picture books are cool. With ordinary books, each time your turn the page you get your choice of white or black. It has gotten so ingrained that to do anything but will get you toasted to a crisp in the comments section. Not so with picture books. Each page of a picture book can be whatever colors it needs. Of course, the text is generally still black, or perhaps white if contrast demands it, but the rest is allowed all the pretty colors it could wish for. The post-elementary world needs more picture books. Therefore, on a cold day in March, it struck my fancy to do something about it. I cannot not paint with colors; however, so I settled for painting with words instead. The result was Three Left Turns.
The Core Idea
In writing Three Left Turns, I was chasing strong, fantastical, impressions. There was not much of a plan. I simply started writing with the idea that everything should have its own personality and presence. I even played with the idea that as Miyazaki was to breathtaking visuals, this story would be to the reader's mental picture.
The Writing
I opened with the idea of picture books because writing this felt more like painting. The only difference is that where an artist has colors, I was mixing impressions around. I started with whatever feeling or idea struck my fancy: a burned out city, a refreshingly ancient place, or a cute beanie cap. Then I would expand and explore the idea by adding details or letting Twilight interact with whatever it was. This was bolstered by my desire to avoid thinking too much into things. When I wrote this, I had just over-thought myself into canceling yet another draft before it was really begun, so I was more concerned with letting the ideas out: when I tried to corral them, the story died.
However, I was also coming off of Waiting for Her Wings, which had taught me that writing what I felt like without regard for the reader was going to lead to confusion and a bad reading experience. For this reason, I made sure to include very strong central action that anyone can more or less follow. We may not know how the weird world fits together, but at the very least we know bad things are happening, and Twilight is trying to buy enough supplies to save the day. I also took a page from fairy tales in that I made the rules clear and absolute where they were established. Money is universally worthless. To get anything, you must give up part of yourself. The world does not have to give Twilight any slack whatsoever. In doing so, it becomes easier for the person who just wants a quick read to skim through and feel like they had read a legitimate story, even if the details were wonky.
With my focus on the visuals and rolling with whatever came along, I found my narration growing dryer and dryer, eventually settling into a stark voice. It got so dry that even dialog became distantly narrated, though not without respect for how the characters might chose to speak. I do not think I have seen anything quite like it on the site. It was neither good nor bad. It simply was.
However, with this distant narration came my recurring problem: how was I to market... whatever this was? I wanted the reader to experience the story as it was with as little outside context as possible, and I was not very sure of what it was in the first place. I suppose it was a romp of the imagination, but it was rather dark in places, and as much fun as I had writing it, there was not very much humor to be found. I settled on the bare minimum content label.
The Reception
This story opened quietly to around 180 views if memory serves. It is my only story to fall below the 1 thumb:10 views threshold, but not by much. In August, it somehow gained a resurgence in popularity on the order of another ~150 views for reasons that still elude me to this day. I see no referrals, and I never plugged the story at that time, so why everyone suddenly decided to read it is a mystery. Whatever happened, it brought a comment from the one and only Bad Horse, which made my day.
Audience reactions were mixed. Fantasia Archsage gave me a glowing review that spoke to how much this odd little world of mine had given them to think about. Definitely proud of that. On the other hand, quite a few people were confused. The story is written in a very odd style, and as someone pointed out to me, I had gone so dry that I had not exactly made a point. There was action, but the action was unresolved. There was impression, but nothing that melded together into any clear parting message or meaning. People were left feeling more or less empty at the end.
It also did not help that after I had kicked this story out, I was riding a blazing afterglow. I sent it to EqD and TRG without consulting a pre-reader for an honest second opinion or even reading it through a second time. No one really knew what to do with it. EqD thought it had been written in google translate of all things. I feel silly in hindsight, though the google translate comment still has me scratching my head. I inquired farther, but no reply. Oh well. TRG was more helpful: the story did not have a strong enough main thread to leave an comprehensible impression, the style was bizarre, and while the setting was surreal, it was too sensical to be anything but what it was, which was confusing. The first two were both fair points in hindsight, though I am not sure about the third.
Props and Slops
Props to Harry the bear. Bear + beanie cap = pure genius. The visuals in general are something I am proud of. In addition to being very fun to write, I think they also served as an excellent example of how to write evocative description.
Slops to my release attitude. When I put this story up, I felt like it was this marble statue shined to perfection and unimprovable. If I had gone and gotten a few more opinions, it probably would have become apparent that I had meandered through a story, threw out a few pretty scenes, but never sat down to be brave and hammer out a point. It is a portmanteau with a weak finish. Interesting, but it could have been stronger, I think.
Dear Princess Celestia...
Once again, by erring on the dry side, I put out a story that gives the reader a lot of leeway to ask why things are the way they are and draw their own conclusions. The people who enjoyed the story most seemed to have gotten lost in putting the pieces together for themselves, and I am happy to have given them the opportunity. I do not see this kind of thing on FimFic often, so viva variety!
On the other hand, I went so dry that I ended up losing people. Even Bad Horse felt justified in asking for an explanation. Fewer downvotes this time, so I think the strong core action helped, but I need to work on building a complete experience from beginning to end. Strong impressions are nothing without a common tie.
Editors or at least pre-readers are going on my must have list for next time. Also, I need to sit down and write the description out before I start writing. Writing by discovery is all good and well, but twice now I have been left with something that is interesting but not necessarily broadly compelling. I hardly even knew what to do with this story when it came time to advertize. Next time, I need to sit down, come up with a strong reader experince, and deliver on it. No more wibbly-wobbly arthouse experiments.
Lastly, there is a big difference between what things look like and what they are. Anyone can list off adjectives, metaphors, and other descriptions, but this is not enough to give an impression of what the thing is. More lively description can be written with the attitude not of listing how something appears, but rather evoking how a beholder should feel about the object.
So at last I have come to an end of my stories to discuss. Kumberbuzzles Over Canterlot would be next, but I have still not quite decided what I want to do with it. Perhaps if I ever get around to finishing it, the postmortem will follow. Until that happy time, it is back to my usual weekly writing advice blogs. See everyone next week for Character-Centric Plotting 101.
You... You didn't see?
2476845
What?
...
That's twice now that I have been plugged on site blogs without realizing it
Thanks for the heads up
2478325
You silly pone.