A moment of self-clarity... · 2:47am Sep 12th, 2014
... which should've happened a long time ago, but I guess I was too thick to see it. Yesterday I was taking a walk in the morning through the woods, a lot of fog that morning, pretty damp. Anyway, during this walk I tried to think and really focus on what it is that's keeping me from writing. I mean, whatever it is, I need to deal with it. It's not that I don't want to write, I love to write and you guys know that, but when it's time I just can't get anything done. Which is kind of ironic since I'm writing this blog right now.
Either way, I tried to find an answer. What happened? No answer, just more inspiration for what to write. I got this idea for Black Dawn of how to lengthen the story arc of one particular character, and got some really good ideas of what to do. Said character was actually meant to die before the end of Black Dawn, but with the recent death of Duskshine, and another planned as well, it didn't fit right with the story. Sure, everything is fucked and hopeless, but if too many characters die too often, it makes it less dramatic and the characters themselves less memorable(most of the time, anyway). So instead of killing off this character in the first story, it will be part of every story of the entire trilogy, until the end of all things.
So, I got back home, sat down to write aanndd... nothing. Two hours later, only 300 words written. And that was when I realized why. The reason why I'm stuck, why I can't write properly and why it's so slow; dialogue. I've always had problems with dialogue and conversations in stories, but it never occurred to me that it could cripple me completely, but that's what it's done. Black Dawn specifically probably has more dialogue than most of my other stories, where a lot of things has to be said in just the right way(not giving away too much or too little, keeping everypony in character and constant questions) at the right time and not a moment earlier. Everything has to be just so to at least keep a semblance of story.
All this time, I've been looking for a reason why, and found that the answer has been right in front of me all the time. I guess I've been focusing too hard on actually finding the answer, rather than looking at it rationally, and in doing so it went completely over my head. It's the same thing with most of my stories; Black Dawn, I get stuck at dialogue. Crow in Shining Armor, same thing; trouble with the encounters that has to happen between the characters. Even the stories I haven't published yet, it's the same thing; stuck at dialogue. I struggle to make conversations feel realistic and fluid, but I don't know if I've succeeded in that or not, because I don't know!
At least now I know what's wrong, and I know what I need to work on to get better. I have lines that sound great pop up in my head, but it's so hard to make them work in proper dialogue.. I know I may seem like a whiny little bitch at times, but now I at least know where the fault lays. Look at my highest rated stories; The Edge, very little dialogue, only basic lines. Silence; No spoken dialogue whatsoever.
So.. yeah, obligatory blog-ending music;
(For the record, I didn't like the FFXIII-trilogy. But this song is too good to not enjoy.)
Well now you know, and knowing is half the battle! Yo Joe!
The problem is it's hard to write a novel without dialogue, never mind a novel...Is there a way to practice dialogue? I don't know about you but when the dialogue in a book or other form of written entertainment like fimfiction gets too casual it seems odd to me, and ironically unrealistic. Not sure why....