Rage Thought: Six Shades of Rainbow · 3:59am Aug 9th, 2014
Okay, I will outright say I hate this fic. So without further ado, let's talk about the horrible monster known as Six Shades of Rainbow.
Concept:
I love this concept. I love it in every iteration in every medium I see it in. Which is part of the problem. He does the same as every other thing where it is random Mcguffin that causes a character to change to their base emotions ramped to the max. Don't actually mind that until I realized that Twilight is just learning a spell for no reason. Great way to spend your time princess. That and to get RD there, Pinkie literally rips off Griffin the Brush Off. Just because people hated that episode doesn't mean you can take the flying bike from it and call it new. So the way it happens is predictable and played for very poor laughs.
However, he straight up lies to us in the summary of the idea. Why do I have the audacity to say this? I will admit that he does do some of the insanity he promises, but that doesn't seem to be the main point of the fic. The main point of the fic, is vengeance. Anger wants to see the Mane 5 burn for transgressions done upon Rainbow. Namely, hoding her back. I understand anger can be interpreted like this, especially if ego were a part of it, but ego is another Rainbow Dash. This makes no sense for an angry Rainbow Dash.
Finally t=is the bullshit at the end of the second chapter. Just as you might be getting better from your severe case of whiplash, you are thrown into havig to swallow that these emotions have always been sentient, and knew that one day they would be divided. Wait, let me get that straight. Twilight's accidental long range firing of a spell at an apple that hit Rainbow Dash only because of stupid Pinkie being stupid, WAS FATE!? And don't try to say it wasn'y fate because Sad Dash talks about having told the others she wasn't going with them. So yeah, good base concept, but it is tripe, clichè, and then needlessly complicated and going back on itself.
Comedy:
Says its a comedy, lets have a look. *Sits for a moment* Fuck.
ALL OF THE COMEDY IS IMMATURE FEATURE BOX BAIT! All of it. From basic character traits being laughed at to having to point out a titties joke, it is all for cheap laughs and stupidity. None of it is clever, none of it is new. I would simply say it isn't my type of comedy as I have admitted in the past, except for times like the forced meme of 10 seconds flat! And the even more forced joke of Anger trying to stop Ego from saying it. Why? She doesn't know its a meme. From what she knows, RD has said it once in her lifetime. Anyways, enough about pandering comedy, let's talk about the other tag.
Romance:
Ahh, couldn't you just feel the love between two mares who have been hiding their feelings from one another? Good for you, because I sure didn't. On my first reading of this the scene went by so fast I didn't remember AJ talking. In fact, I thought if she said no she was gonna be raped because it felt like it's just, "Let's bang!" And then AJ can't say anything back. So yeah, AppleDash for the sake of AppleDash though they state it's a crush so why wouldn't AJ say something back about the suddenness? And don't say it's because they both loved each other. These are the two most up front vharacters in the show, so one of them would have said something. Moving on.
Characters:
Reduced to their base traits including Spike being nothing more then an assistant and a push over, However, my complaint doesn't end there. The copies for the most part do feel like RD. It was somewhat well done on that point, except Joy and Mischief. Mischief literally wants to see the world burn and led to one of the most forced sexual jokes and confusing bits of dialogue in the story, and Joy isn't RD at all. She's Pinkie. And in a fic where you already have one poorly done Pinkie, a second isn't necessary.
Second complaint goes to reactions. AJ barely questions the change in color past thinking it makes her hotter which muddles the romance further. And again, AJ is strong willed and up front. One of her friends starts acting all wierd, she will ask questions. Same goes for Rarity, though I can't entirely blame her. She is simply a victim to
Execution:
Regardless of all these other flaws, this is one of the worst. If you want to tell an intriguing story, go ahead. If you want a romance and randomness involved as well, go ahead. Don't try to cram scenes that are stupid, pointless, and just feature box bait like AJ and Rarity's into three-five hundred word segments. The whole story feels rushed, and everything is the sake of a joke when it could be done so much better and should be handled better seeing as he seams to want an actual plot in it!
Final thoughts:
I wouldn't recommend this to anyone. From the rampant amount of grammar errors, all of it teasing just to make sure you'll stick around and favorite it, the rushed pacing, the unoriginality and memes, it is bad. There is no reason to to read this, seeing as this is just his attempt at making the featured box with as ludicrous and stupidity as he could come up with. It is simply done poorly, and has dug itself a ditch that I can't see a way out of.
I get that the purpose of a rage style review is to have some cathartic entertainment along with the actual points, and with that in mind I certainly had a laugh here. Especially the comedic pause right when you were going to look for comedy, perfect timing!
That said. While you do bring up some good points that can be improved upon, and some that most certainly should be improved upon... there are a few things I'd point out.
It is entirely possible that I missed it, but was it ever explained why Twilight was learning party favor spells during Boast Busters?
Through out the show we see Twi learning spells that do not appear to have any practical purpose, like turning frogs into oranges. (Hey both spells misfired, its what I thought of first.)
It is mentioned that Twi saw the spell in action before, and given her nature it is natural she simply wanted to learn how to do it for knowledge-sake, or as she would describe it, fun.
Pinkie is shown as owning such a flying contraption during that episode, yes.
She uses said flying contraption here.
So using something that has continuity with the show is a ripoff now?
I think that is a misunderstanding, they are talking about what they said/thought to each other while Twilight's spell was splitting them apart.
So it's not that they knew it in advance, merely that in the moment Twi's spell gave them sentience they had time to agree on something. (Namely: Run!)
Though all we know so far is that they had a moment, we don't quite know how long that moment was to them, relatively.
I saved this one for last, because everything else I understand is dealing with the fic and the problems you see with it, and that's fine, welcome even if I know Fimfic4ever.
But this is different, here you are attacking not the fic, but the actual writer's motivations, and accusing him of only writing it for the sake of hitting the feature box.
As though that was his intent, rather than just to write a story he was honestly excited about writing and sharing with others.
Which I think is taking it a step too far.
In my experience Fimfic4ever has a lot of problems that he needs to work on, and that I know will improve with experience and feedback(such as this), but he is one of the most genuinely passionate writers I have ever spoken to, that does what he does because he loves it, not for attention.
)
He just happened to explode overnight with this one. (Goodness knows I'm a little bit jealous.
That's all I've got. Keep up the good work.
2355462 I will agree to a point. First, you've got me on Twilight, but it still seems like a copout, especially since she is now a princess. Two, Pinkie may still have that contraption, but why is she using it here. We know her normal method to talk to Rainbow in the skies is screaming at her. Also, that even when chasing her down, she normally pops up once she stops.
As for the emotions, no. I agree that they seem to have agreed to run when they got out, but Anger has a legit plan. A plan that he has figured out apparently five minutes into life. This doesn't happen, especially to Rainbow, especially when you know what could foil it, and then still allow members of your group to get away and possibly never come back. (Why would Lust ever leave AJ's side?) As well, Sad calls it the great dividing. Seeing as this happened at best a few hours ago, seems a little early for the depressed one to be adding titles to it.
As for the motivation, honestly, it wasn't actually at the author. It's just that so much of the comedy, so much of the plot, and even the quick sexual romance, is all things you hear as feature box bait, and none of it is clever, none of it's original, and none of it adds to the plot. I'm merely asking that instead of writing something that has been done fifteen thousand times but adding a nice hook from other medias, actually write something that feels inspired and imaginative.
I did not mean to offend you or the author, but that is how I feel the story and events were. However, I did not declare some nice things about that meme culture I can in the comments here. I admittedly liked the transition with Derpy, even if it still felt forced. I have a bitch of a time coming up with transitions, so I understand the pain, and it actually got me to chuckle because it felt clever. So not EVERYTHING was bad, but not worth the attention it has gotten,
2355499
Ah, my apologies. I misunderstood your intended meaning regarding the bait.
Thank you for clearing that up.
Regarding the princess and the use of the flying bike, I can't say anything that would not be just a convenient excuse on the level of trying to talk Star wars lore straight.
Yes, Anger appears to have some kind of actual plan, but has utterly failed to get any of the other Dashes to follow it any further than that it was convenient for their own agenda's. (Escaping.) Without knowing Angers plan, I can't comment on how believable I find it. It may be some long held grudge that RD has held, and thought about on occasion, Mysterious Mare-Do-Well comes to mind actually. Or it could be completely out of nowhere, which would be pretty odd.
The title for the event is something I stubbed my toe on too, though so far only Sad Dash referred to it as such, and I guess I am kind of okay with 'Emo Dash' talking like that. I'd be 'surprised' if anypony else refers to it like that independently though.
2355563 Honestly, i;m just annoyed that its mcguffins being used instead of creativity when it comes to Twi and Pinkie.
As for Anger, I meant to include this in the review. Anger is always one of those staples in these fics, but with his constant chant of being constantly dragged down, I would have understood the hate much better if it was Dash's ambition, not her anger. It would also be an interesting take in my opinion.