So I have adult human stuff going on. · 10:05pm Jun 13th, 2014
Well, It's been an interesting week for me. It was my step dads birthday yesterday so I spent some time with my family and had fun like I always do. I don't know why I tend to avoid going to my parent's place, possibly because it's a nearly hour drive. Anyway, that's not the big news that is even as I type creating internal turmoil within me. The big news is, I decided I love my boyfriend enough to consider marriage. Mind you this was all my idea, I brought it up first. Anyway, as I am an adult and can't really afford to be impulsive, I've decided I'm going to take a few months to collect my thoughts and go to a live in technical school called Job Corps. Though I feel in my heart I already know the answer buck fuck my heart, last time I jumped the gun on a big choice I ended up homeless and being alienated and shunned by half my family. So here's part two of my problem; Kentucky, where I live, wont allow me and my boyfriend to get married and they won't accept and out of state marriage licence those ignorant backwards fucks! Anyway so yeah, if any of you were wondering about my gender, now you know. That's also the reason for my aforementioned alienation and homelessness. Normally I disdain things like this, I don't understand the big deal about marriage and I really don't get relationships but that's how I feel and that's what it's about right? Feelings?
Welcome to America, where the ignorant, bigoted, and rich control the country. Land of the free my ass.
Anyway, I feel for ya; really I do, but unfortunately there's not much I can say that'll make anything any better and we both know that. So... good luck with whatever life throws at you, and I hope it goes well eventually.
Oh, and if anyone gives you trouble, give 'em a good kick in the balls for me. Whether they're male or female.
Trust me on this, rushing into a marriage because your heart tells you it's right is a bad idea. I've been there. I'm still getting out of there. You're making the right decision by putting it off until the initial thoughts of, "Oh my god, I actually want to marry this person!" go away. Job Corps is a wonderful program. Just about all my high school friends went into it.
As for your predicament, I suggest Oregon? I know for a fact that Job Corps has a large presence there, and if I'm not mistaken, they've legalized gay marriage. I know it's way far away from Kentucky, but if this is really something you want to do, then it's something to think about.
As for your gender and sexuality, is it weird that I never wondered. I just felt like I knew, and I was ok without wondering. I was right, which is cool, but I still think it might be odd that I came to that decision without actually making a conscious one, and with little evidence, yet I was confident enough to never speculate. Maybe I've just had so many gay friends that I can tell through the internet.
2204749 Thanks, being able to articulate my thoughts and feeling in type helps my process better, I wasn't necessarily expecting sage wisdom that would solve my problems (though I certainly wouldn't mind getting me some of that). Yeah, fuck this place! I sent an Email to the governor about how dumb it is but I know how far that'll go. Anyway, yea, I think I can get down with some good old fashioned balls kicking
I can't really advise you what to do, as I've never been in a relationship before. If I were you, from your previous experience, I would definitely collect my thoughts, but if you feel you are ready, then go for it! Regarding the law, you could enter into a civil partnership (I don't know if that applies in Kentucky, I only know of the UK), but you could always hold an informal gathering and say your own vows. I don't know if there are any legal implications against this (such as accommodation, name changes and bank stuff) , but it may get past the lawful marriage issue.
Like I say, I've never been in a relationship before so i have no experience in this field and I'm only good with UK and EU and International laws.
This being said, I wish you and your boyfriend the best of luck, my congratulation, a small bottle of champagne and a box of Twinnings Earl Grey (you can't live without it)
Best of luck!
-Twilight_Scratch
And that's why I don't live in murica. Too many laws against gay rights (and they call themselves the land of the free) that I despise. I support gay rights 1000000% and I don't believe anywhere is truly free until we are all equal in law and in society. As for the marriage stuff, you're making the right decision by putting it off. Rushing into it is a good way to end up alone, but I feel happy for you and wish you the best of luck in the future. Just promise me this; make sure that you are absolutely 100% positive that this man is the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. Because I promise you that if that isn't the case and you're just rushing into things blindly, they will not work out. As was said in the movie "Baggage Claim", the magic isn't in getting married, it's in staying married. (No, I did not want to watch it, mom put it on when we were going to sleep in the hotel and it kept me up half the night).
Anyway, best of luck and I hope everything works out for you!
-Devs
my cousin is having the same problem but thats the people of kentucky for you most of us are just a bunch of straight up red neck assholes but i support you 100% and i wish you good luck with the whole marriage thing
Oh. That puts our conversation in a different light. It's awesome that you can have a civil conversation with someone who believes so differently than you. That shows an unusual amount of maturity (I don't know how unusual it is; I just have seen very little of it).
I hope that whatever happens that you and your loved one will be happy!
I am a little worried about getting married. I tend to read into things the wrong way and I seem to be awkward with relationships. It gets so confusing in my head at times, spinning in circles. I will get married, of course. I really want someone I can love and trust, and feel the same about me. And I want to follow in my dad's footsteps. It's just the process that makes me a little anxious.
Anyway, Bassie was correct. Oregon legalized homosexual marriage about a month ago. I still remember the day. Almost every guy at school was bitching about it. I for one am cully supportive of the gay rights movement. You can't choose to be gay or straight, you can only choose to be yourself. Just so you know, if you do move to Oregon, for some reason, let me know. As you've probably gathered, I live there. Good luck, both of you.