FOE: Hooves of Fate Chapter 1 review.

Alright, Fallout Equestria: Hooves of Fate. Time to see what this story is all about. The basic premise set up by the description is that a pony from pre-war Equestria somehow gets visions of The Wastes in her sleep. Spends her nights dreaming of living in them. While during the day, struggles to find a way to stop it from happening.

Alright right off just from that description, I really like the idea and am interested. First, because it gives something new to the FOE story. Seeing how a pony from pre-war Equestria will respond to what will happen. Sure there are a few of those around, Ditzy, Lionheart, Spike. But all of them lived through it, they saw things deteriorate, saw what brought the world to that point. This is somepony jumping over that, not being able to adjust as it happens. But rather seeing the whole thing. Just that perspective is something I'm eager to see.

But the other reason is because that set up reminds me a lot of TerryBrooks' WordAndVoid series. The basic premise, spending their nights dreaming of a post-apocalyptic future, and then the day using those visions to try and prevent it, is the same thing that happens to the Knights of the Word. So that might be coloring how I see this playing out.

Right now, just from the premise I see this playing out in three possible ways.

1. She does somehow alter the future and prevent The End. Prevent the Wastes, and this is really an AU to FOE. Showing how, like with Littlepip, sometimes one little pony CAN change the world. Great theme, and could make for a great uplifting story. But honestly, I don't really feel like that's how it will go.

2. DownerEnding. All of it is for nothing, she has to watch it all happening without anyway to stop it, and it ends in failure. The End can not be stopped. Really hope this isn't the case. The core theme, and what I loved most about FOE was that it was, at it's core, about hope. So to go that route.. no thanks. But again don't think it's likely, just possible.

3. The one I both think is most likely of the options I can think of right away, and the one I kind of hope is the case. It is that it works out like it does in WordAndVoid. Though you don't find this out in the initial trilogy, but rather a sequel series, The Knights fail. Everything they did failed to stop the apocalypse. The Demons won. The dark future they spent their nights living through and days trying to prevent was unstoppable.

Now yeah this may seem like nothing more then option 2. But it's not, because yeah, while they failed to stop The End. Failed to prevent the massive world ending apocalypse. That, was never really the point of their dreams, or their work. It wasn't about that big, large scale 'winning' it was about the smaller victories. The Knights used what they learned in those glimpses of the future to have a positive effect on the present. Find horrors and travesties that had happened and stop them before they caused as much destruction as they might. Save, not the world, but just a few people. They were acting on a much smaller, but no less important scale. And yet it was thought the actions of one Knight that things were set in motion that led to people surviving the final Apocalypse, and making the whole thing a large prequel to his main work, {{Shannara}}.

So yeah, those are the possible ways I can see this going, and hoping it is something like number 3. Though maybe it will surprise me. Anyway, on with the actual story.

We start with a prologue which is short enough to just directly quote

There's always the bomb - the megaspell that's destined to obliterate Equestria. When I first saw the Wasteland in my dreams, I thought it was my job to stop it. To stop the war, to stop the megaspells, to stop us ponies from becoming the monsters I saw in visions of our dark future.

The trouble is: I can't stop it. Nopony can. You can change the future; you can change the present. Rumor has it that, with the right spells, you can even change the past, but some things simply won't budge. The apocalypse, sad to say, is one of them. It is going to happen. No matter what you do, the doomsday clock just keeps on ticking.

There's always the bomb.

So, looks like option 1 is off the table, and making it look more like option 3 is right, or there is something else in store. (Yeah yeah 2 is still there but, really hope that's not the case.) But then again, this could be a fake out. Could just be her thinking it when she's writing, before finding some way to change it. But, yeah looking like the End will come, but how will our main character affect it? (Also, insert DoctorWho 'fixed point in time' comment here.)

The actual first chapter starts off with a TSEliot quote from The Waste Land ''"I will show you fear in a handful of dust."'' rather appropriate.

The actual narrative starts out in first person, another case of the main character looking back and telling her story. Saying it all started, where so many ponies stories start, with getting her cutie mark. And how unlike most ponies, it was not one of the best days of her life, but one of the worst.

First off, she still doesn't know what the buck it means. Second she talks about how much she wanted to be like every other kid, but that it just couldn't happen, because she had found the Wastes (Or it had found her). And it had let her a changed pony, though not necessarily a better one.

Okay, a small bit but we already get a few things. First we're dealing with a foal, which should make the Wastes... far far more dangerous for her and also just, make the impact that much worse. Second, a few hints that, even while writing this she isn't exactly that much more grown then when she got her cutie mark.

I still don't know what the bucking* thing means *(Sssh! My sister says I'm not supposed to use that word).

...

I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really just wanted to be like every other kid.

And yes the * is written in, which makes me wonder if this was meant to be her writing it out. Not something more like a transcription of a audio recording like Littlepip's was.

But again nice set up, giving us information to start sinking our teeth into, while setting up any number of questions to be answered. How did she 'find' the Wastes? How long ago was that? Just the whole thing has me rather hooked right from the start and wanting to find out more, so great job with that.

Next is her describing how she had a plan for getting her Cutie Mark.

Have you ever noticed that a lot of ponies' names are pretty much just descriptions of their cutie marks? Well, I did, but nopony believed me,

Somepony actually noticing the whole MeaningfulName deal? Okay this is new. And everypony else just acting like she's crazy. So it's something ponies just, don't want to see, hmmm, time travel (of a sorts), fixed points in time, and now hints at some kind of perception filter, even if one self applied by ponies. More and more I'm expecting a blue box to show up at some point.

And after that, we get her actual name, Rose Petal. As well as her saying her older sister is Roseluck, and a brief description of herself, using her sister as a contrast. Same basic color scheme, except with with white, yellow and pink streaks in her mane. Between the name, and the fact that her mane was all the more common color of roses, she figures her special talent must have something to do with them. Roseluck... seems to not quite agree with her for some reason.

"Sis," I said. "Can you teach me to garden?"

She spit out her tea at the mention of it.

So, more questions. Why did Roseluck react like that? She then asks if she's sure, and if she wants to give it 'another try'. So guessing something bad happened last time Rose Petal tried it.

Also we get this.

I just grinned widely and nodded. My grin was cute enough to make a squeaky sound, so I knew I had her wrapped around my hoof.

Okay so. First the MeaningfulName bit, now this. I could see this being a bit off putting for people. A bit to 'meta' being able to notice these things that nopony ever really seems to. I am okay with it though, as long as it's not to overdone. But I'm also left wondering if maybe this actually has a meaning to it. Was it just done for the meta jokes about these things? The story did make clear that even when she tried to share her little bit about the names, they just looked at her like she was crazy or something. So what if it's actually important to the story? What if whatever it is about her that lets her notice these things, is also part of why she ends up in The Wastes in the first place?

Now so far, and going by what all I have seen, this seems to be written much more like an MLP story then a Fallout one. Looking at things more heavily from that side then the other, or the blending of the two the original was. But, since it IS an FOE one, some things can be said. Like so far I'm figuring that when it comes to SPECIAL Rose Petal has extremely high Perception. So lets see how this plays out. Quick, one off meta jokes, or actual plot points?

We then move on to Roseluck's garden, and, gotta say I really like the rather poetic description of the place, and a few little touches. Like Rose Petal noting how the two bushes at the entrance remind her of the stone statues of 'big kitties' she's seen in photos guarding the entrance to the Manehatten library. (Though this being Equestria, find myself wondering if they aren't statues of manticores.) Even naming one of the bushes Larry. Then after mentioning how Roseluck says her garden shines brighter then Princess Celestia's stained glass windows, but they shouldn't ever say that to anypony, especially not the Princess, we get this.

So far, I have not been given the opportunity, but if it ever does come up, I feel ready to be civil about the whole window thing.

This, is the start of one of my.. not quite issues, but flaws I guess... in the work so far. I'll get more into it later, but for now, it's basically that a lot of times, Rose Petal.. the one doing the writing, doesn't feel as young as she's supposed to be. Oh there are plenty of times she does, and the what feels very childlike. But just certain word choices, phrases here and there just, don't feel like something any foal would be using that way. But more later on that. Aside from that I do really like the description, and even her little asides.

"Rose Petal, no!"

Before I knew it, the giant shears that I'd picked up were snatched right out of my hooves.

"But-but," I started to whine. A stern look zipped my lip pretty fast and told me that that line of complaining wasn't going to get me anywhere. My poor sister looked exhausted. She tried to hide it, but she never was very good at that sort of thing.

"Why don't we start you out with…" Roseluck looked around at all of the various gardening tools, desperate for something she could give me that I wouldn't hurt myself with.

So, is it that Rose Petal has a habit of 'accidents' or something that makes Roseluck so nervous? Or is she simply paranoid and over protective? Given this is one of the Flower Trio, being paranoid and overly excitable is something I could totally see. But in the end she settles on giving Rose Petal a bag of soil to beat the clumps out of.

"Dirt?"

This time it was her turn to give the adorable squeaky smile. Older sisters shouldn't be able to do that! It’s not fair.

Okay even if the whole being able to notice those things ends up NOT being in any way an actual plot point. It would be worth adding it just for that. So cute!

Roseluck leaves Rose Petal to get to work. And we find out just why she was so worried about her younger sister.

Desperate as I was, I really didn't want to end up with a cutie mark in dirt. Luckily, as it turned out, I was in no danger of that. No sooner had Big Sis disappeared into the shed to get some supplies than I found myself face first in a pile of dirt, and covered with thorn scratches from head to hoof. I'm not exactly sure how it happened, but it started with a garden hose I tripped on, a rake to the face, a whirlwind of I don't even remember what, and, well, let's just say it escalated from there. I am not a graceful pony.

Gardening was out. Check.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!! That was good. Also, so we can add an atrociously low Agility score to her SPECIAL.

So with that out of the question she then spends months helping out with any gardening or farming related task she can think of. Mentioning her friend Blueberry Milkshake who tagged along now and then. And who eventually found her own cutie mark. Surprisingly, it was a Blueberry Milkshake, who'd have guessed. Rose Petal giving everything she had to help out in activities on town. Except for those involved with school.

I like Miss Cheerilee and all, but I wasn't about to spend any more time in that big red house than I had to. I'm not crazy! At least I wasn't crazy yet. I didn't start losing my mind until the dreams started happening.

And a reminder of just what is in store for the little filly. The story so far has done a great job of quickly setting her up as just a regular filly. And yeah, I'm already getting attached to her. But, a reminder of how bad things are about to get. Now, as to 'losing her mind' it raises even more questions. Are we being somewhat literal? As in she really is being effected that badly? Or is it more of a deal where she feels like she is, but is still as perfectly sane as anypony is? More mystery, more questions. Which is great this early on.

Right after that little reminder, we get a bigger one, as we find out the story is about to get to that point. Rose getting to the night she earned her Cutie Mark. Getting tucked in by her older sister to her annoyance. But saying she wasn't afraid of nightmares, not yet anyway. That the worst she'd ever had involved the normal embarrassing things. being late for school, doing something for Diamond Tiara to tease her about etc... which gives up this bit.

something to do with that bitch* Diamond Tiara.

(Okay, I’m really, really, really not supposed to use that word, but since neither Diamond Tiara nor Roseluck are ever going to read this, I might as well get it out of my system now. Diamond Tiara is the bitchiest bitch who ever bitched in from Bitch Street down by the Bitch District of midtown Bitchville. Why? Because she’s just that big of a bitch, and even her cutie mark indicates that her special talent is being a spoiled bitch. I bet she will die alone. She will die alone of being a bitch. There, I said it.)

Well, a whole lot to go on in there. First, so it IS being written out. Called it! Second, why would DT or Roseluck never read this? Diamond Tiara I can see, but why would her sister never read this writing? Who is it being made for? Why? When? Next, yeah that's a pretty good description of her. And finally, that last line.... and knowing just what Diamond Tiara's ultimate fate is in the verse..... pretty well done mood whiplash there.

But for now, she's still just a regular happy foal. Trying to get a bedtime snack from her sister before she goes to sleep and getting denied. But pressing the issue. If she can't have a sandwich before bed, how about a bedtime story about sandwiches?

“You can’t have a sandwich so you want me to tell you a story about sandwiches.”

“Can the story have pickles on it? And mayonnaise?”

Roseluck didn’t bat an eye. She’s just that used to me. “Sure,” she said, on condition of my going to sleep afterward.

I don’t remember what the story was about. I just know it started with “Once upon a time there was a sandwich named Ryelight Sparkle, who journeyed to Sandwichville to oversee the planning for the Summer Sandwich Celebration” and then I fell asleep.

Really liking the little bits of humor so far. And that right there, is a big sister who has dealt with this far to often is just done. Not even trying anymore to hide the fact she knows it's just Rose Petal messing with her. But, this also raises another question. What's the deal with their parents? Where are they?

But, now that she's asleep, we get our first trip to the Wasteland. (And I swear my youtube playlist is possessed or something. It always picks the most oddly appropriate or inappropriate songs for what I'm writing about. Just as we get to the Wasteland portion, "Wasteland Soul" pops up.)

At first it was black. Black as black blackitty black black. Then I saw a blinding green flash, and heard the screams of millions of ponies. It was like having a chalkboard inside your brain with countless razors scraping against it, only worse because every scratch was actually somepony crying.

I think I screamed. Yes, I must’ve. But I couldn’t hear my own voice…At all.

Damn, that, that is just. Good start to a nightmare.

She comes to in a broken chimney. Wriggling out to look at the devastation around her. Nothing recognizable to her, and nothing giving her any clue where she is. The thick clouds overhead blocking any sign of the sky.

So yeah we're in the Wastes, but the question is, how far into it? How long after the War? And just where is she? We know Ponyville would be intact enough to be recognizable, but this is just rubble around her. So where is she?

“Hello?” I called out with a cough. The dust in my throat probably saved my life. Everypony in the Wasteland knows you don’t just call out blindly like that. You’re a whole lot safer if whoever is out there doesn’t find you. But I didn’t know that. I wasn’t from the Wasteland, was I?

Okay, yes a nice bit of truth about the Wastes. And leads one to wonder just how much time she HAS spent there at this point. How well she's figured things out.
Stumbling out of the ruins she falls down a small cliff, skinning her knees up and only prevented from crying by looking up and seeing something that shocks her out of the pain. A billboard. One of the Ministries' propaganda things.

A sign bigger than a cottage loomed over me, at least the parts of it that were in tact. There was a zebra depicted in the center unlike any zebra I’d ever seen. Okay, so I’d only ever seen one zebra back in Ponyville, but she was nothing like this. The zebra in the picture had features so exaggerated that she was hardly recognizable as pony at all! Giant white teeth and eyes, more rings on her ears and neck than any actual zebra could fit on her whole body, and a bone driven straight through her muzzle. She leant maliciously in the back room of a bookstore, cackling over a cauldron full of skulls. An entire battalion of strangely dressed royal guards seized her, and reached into her satchel, but even then, she didn’t seem to want to take her attention off of that skull pot. It was as though it would take a dozen of Equestria’s Finest just to take out a single zebra by the sheer malice of her personality, and Terrifying Evil of her intent. Standing in the corner was a concerned citizen, smiling like a dope, hoof pointed nobly at the zebra’s direction, and a crowd of proud onlookers patting him on the back. The caption on the poster, in gigantic yellow letters, read “IF YOU SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING.”

Well, that is definitely a tad overdone. And yet, sadly, yeah I could definitely see this as something the MOI would put out.

We get two rather telling bits from her right after that.

There was a lot about that picture I didn’t understand at the time, and still don’t understand today. All I know is that it was clearly designed for grown-ups. I mean, look at it! It would have to be. Sitting there in the middle of a wasteland, staring slack-jawed at this crazy image, I was reminded of how stupid adults are. No matter how hard I try, I just can’t understand them, and hope I never have to

You see, I don’t know who drew that ridiculous thing, but you’re supposed to look at that Concerned Citizen, and it’s really, really painfully obvious that you’re supposed to think he’s a swell guy – a bucking hero. I couldn’t. All I saw in him was the worst thing anypony in the whole wide world could ever possibly hope to be – a tattletale. Any kid in the world could look at that poster and tell you that, but grown-ups, a lot of them anyway, just aren’t too bright.

Now, this leads me to think of one what one of the themes for the story might be. Looking at the actions, the events of the War, the Ministries. From the much simpler view of a foal. How easy some of the mistakes should have been to see. Even a foal can see how wrong it was. And yet with the second bit, it's also showing that, yeah it might SEEM simpler to her, but it isn't. She's a foal, a child. A much simpler, more innocent view. Yeah it's clear how stupid that poster is. Overdone to the point that it's ridiculous if you actually think about it. And yet too many adults wouldn't. Something like that yeah it's nice to have somepony, especially a child just look at it and point out how stupid it is.

But the tattletale bit shows the other side of that coin. Sometimes things really are more complicated then a foal would understand or think of. It makes it seem to me that, yeah the story will look at things from a view of how clearly stupid some of the things were, how even a foal could see the mistakes. While also making clear that, she isn't always right in that. Yeah sometimes it is just tattletelling. Being a snitch, whatever. But there ARE times when you learn something that needs to be told. Where you do need to step up and alert someone in authority about a threat.

Like many other things Equestria did. Yeah looking at it from outside, you can see how stupid they are. But, at the time, they did make sense. Hindsight is 20/20 after all. And just because Rose might look at things ore simply, more innocently. Can see how obviously flawed and stupid somethings are. Doesn't mean she's always right. Sometimes there are complexities you have to account for. What on first glance may seem like the obvious 'right' answer, isn't when you really stop and think about it.

Not sure if this WILL be a running theme, but I could certainly see it being, and kind of hope it will be. Or if not a theme, then at least something that pops up fairly often. Looking at thinks from the simplified POV, while still keeping in mind that, sometimes yeah it is better to simplify things and see how stupid they are. But others things just can't be made that simple, life is complex sometimes.

But all of this leads her to one conclusion

I didn’t know where I was, or how I would ever manage to get home, but one thing was absolutely certain – this place was some new kind of hell, and I wasn’t in Equestria anymore.

In which she is completely correct, but not in the way she thinks.

She starts to realize that she has no idea where she actually is, or how to get home. Dubbing this new place she is in 'Jerkland'. Rather appropriate.

She hears some hoof steps. Or rather the rattle of stones dislodged by them, and already scared by what she's seen, wisely decides she's rather not meet any of the jerk pony from Jerkland and hides under a pile of rubble, to scared to cry of even sneeze at the dust. Barely even breathing as two raiders go by. (No it doesn't call them raiders, but the description is pretty clear what they are.) Two raiders, and the colt one of them has tied up and is carrying on his back...

Seeing this, and worse the colt seeing her and silently begging for help... Its.. all I can say is it's a well done scene. Rose wanting to help, knowing something bad would be happening, but not sure exactly what. But at the same time, knowing she couldn't actually DO anything.

I opened my eyes again just in time to watch the strange boy’s head sink. I’d let him down. I’d done nothing. Nopony had ever looked at me like that before. I mean, sure Roseluck had been disappointed in me from time time to time, but this was not that “we are mad at you for stealing from the cookie jar and knocking over the cookie jar, and trying to cover it up by pasting the cookie jar back together and sweet Celestia, look at you, how did you even manage to get entire cookies pasted into your mane?” kinda disappointment. No. I gave that strange little boy a glimpse of hope for a tiny moment – maybe even the last feeling of hope he would ever know before they locked him up in a dungeon with no toys and no books and no friends (or whatever it was they were planning to do to him). I gave him hope. Then I broke his heart.

Just, really really well done bit. And do like the little bit of levity in there. Yeah WE know just how ''bad'' things are, but Rose.. she knows they are bad, but not HOW bad, so being a bit less grim makes sense. Plus, it does fit how she would think, and gives the reader a nice little bit of levity, without being to out of place or mood-whiplashy.

This is followed by a voice telling her to follow them. A voice that she hears inside her head, and that sounds exactly like her own. And which she begins to argue with since, you know, there isn't anything she can do to help, and trying would be stupid. And for a bit, it's rather up for debate if this is just her subconscious trying to deal with the guilt of not being able to help, or something else. Then we get this.

“For the last time,” I shouted inside my head as I broke into a silent gallop. “There’s nothing I can do to save him.” A few more steps and I would reach the top of the hill.

Then the voice replied quietly and calmly. “He’s not the one you have to save.”

Wait, what!? So odds of it being just her subconscious are rapidly dropping, but raising so many questions. Who or what is it? Who IS she supposed to save? Questions we don't get any answer to as the voice stops responding. Rose still arguing internally about it. How there was nothing she could do. And, Jerkland may be horrible, and hateful. But even here ponies couldn't be bad enough to kill children, right? Though this is done in a way that's it's clear she's trying to convince herself of it. Not that she truly doesn't believe it's possible. And somehow, she gets a little flash of insight, just a little self mention to how it's been 190 years since things had gone wrong. Immediately questioning herself on how she knew that it had been that long.

So we have a time frame. About a decade or so before Littlepip more or less. So most of the Waste could be recognizable, but she won't be interacting to much with the main stories cast. Second, that question of how she knows this. Is it tied in with that voice? Or is this really just all a dream. Cause everyone's had that happen in dreams, where they just, know, something they shouldn't logically know. More mystery.

This whole time she had been climbing the cliff the raiders had come down, figuring that if they came from there, then it must be clear of other ponies now. At the top she gets two more shocks. First is seeing a nearby village in flames. No ponies rushing around trying to put out the fire. instead a line of ponies walking away. Many towing things behind them.

And second, looking up in the distance, she sees a mountain. And sticking out of the side of that mountain, the unmistakable silhouette of Canterlot.

The dirt in my hooves, the ash in my face – it was us. Not a bunch of jerks from some far away land where jerkiness was somehow more possible than in Equestria. The dust was Equestria. I was home, and somehow, the jerks had been us all along.

[Insert required Planet of the Apes reference here]

But really, that realization, just on it's own, that this WAS Equestria, that something horrible had happened, that reveal. While yeah not anything shocking or odd for the readers, unless they'd never heard of FOE, very well done for the character.

Well this is a big enough shock that she slips and begins to fall back down the cliff, tumbling endlessly...

... Until she wakes up on her bedroom floor and begins screaming in terror. Roseluck rushing in to try and comfort her.

“Rose Petal, Rose Petal, answer me.” She said, gripping me by the shoulders. It was the first real terror I’d heard in her voice since Dad left. “Rose Petal!”

So, their dad left them? Why? And what about their mother? But, it's also a nice moment showing that despite how exasperated Roseluck my have seemed earlier, she does really care for her sister. As she holds the little filly, letting her cry. Just trying to comfort her as the chapter ends.

Thoughts- Well overall, pretty damn good start. I really liked it. It got me involved, made me question what was going on in a good way. A way that made me eager to know what was going on, without making me feel lost. I already like Rose Petal as a character. So yeah this was overall a pretty good start to the story. Though a few issues.

First, is something I alluded to a few times. About how odd some of what Rose was saying sounded coming from what is meant to be a foal. Like this line.

''Like she wasn’t a real pony at all – just a caricature - a thing.''

Just, have a hard time seeing any foal talking like that. Now, the odd thing is, a lot of the time it DOES feel like how a foal would think. But others, not so much. It's mostly just a question of the word choices, phrasing. Not so much the what is being said, as the how. (Again with a few odd word choices for a foal to use.) Rose herself does feel very good as a foal character. And the story as a whole, does a good job of that, of feeling like a story ''about'' a foal. Just, not so much at feeling like one being told ''by'' a foal. Many times, it feels like, well what it is. A story by an adult trying to write like a foal.

But, it's not THAT bad. A tad off putting yeah, but nothing major compared to the story. And on the whole it does work well. So might just be some growing pains. Something that the author will adjust for and get better at as the story goes on. I really have no issue with Rose Petal the narrator. The older one telling the story, being far more mature and experienced then a regular foal should be, given what she's been through. So maybe as we go we'll see that change, see her growing to be more like the pony telling the story as well.

Overall I really really loved the first half, the set up, it just felt so good, really helped me get attached to Rose Petal early, before sending her to The Wastes. The Wastes part, honestly.. I liked, but not as much as the first half. It was where the feeling of it not being a foal writing this really kicked in. Plus I did find her reactions to this.. a tad muted. Finding herself in some strange land, lost, not knowing where home even is. Yeah a lot of it was shock, but still. She was terrified of what might happen, of the raiders, of stuff like that. But not really of what was going on.

Granted that could be explainable. Shock, not really having time to dwell on this. Dream logic. Cause far as we know, this really is just a dream right now. And going to be interesting seeing how she comes to realize this is true, not just a dream. Or is it? How much is going on? Is she really IN the Wastelands when she's there, or just seeing a vision of it? What would happen to her back in Ponyville if something happened in the dream? So many questions, but all done well enough to make me want to keep reading and find the answers.

But yeah overall a pretty good premise, an already likeable character, hints of a few really good possibility for what the story might be about, and a large dose of mystery, without overloading it and leaving the reader totally lost. A really good, though not flawless set up for what looks to be a really great story. Eager to read more.