Fic Reviews II · 6:04pm Mar 6th, 2014
So, I'm continuing this little project. Here's another stack of stories I've read recently.
Twilight, what’s it like to teleport? (Everyone)
by TheExhaustedBrony
So, Ditzy is curious about magic, and poses the titular question. Twilight frets over answering because this is apparently a huge thing that all unicorns are sworn to secrecy about. It’s such a big deal that the conspiracy to keep this knowledge from the other tribes was established by the princesses and Star Swirl the Bearded. And then Twilight avoids the question. And… that’s it.
There isn’t a big reveal.
There isn’t even the avoidance of a big reveal.
The story just… stops.
Seriously. Twilight skirts around the answer, Ditzy does some silly things, then thanks her for trying to explain and leaves. Then Twilight worries briefly about what she’ll say if Ditzy comes back for further explanation, then decides to read a book to keep her mind off of it. The end.
I don’t even know what to say about this.
The Tragedy of Pinkie (Everyone)
by Kajio
One day, Pinkie wakes up to find herself alone. Completely alone. Everypony in the world has vanished.
She copes about as well as she could be expected to.
This is one of the best one-shot Sad fics I’ve seen. Don’t expect a happy ending here.
Wonderful (Everyone)
by Bootsy Slickmane
Derpy thinks about the wonderful day she’s going to have, someday.
This is joining The Tragedy of Pinkie among the best Sad stories or One-Shots I’ve found here.
Last Night Pinkie Pie Exploded (Teen, Gore)
by Selbi
...I don’t get it. I know it’s supposed to be random humor, but this might be too random. Rarity seems to be sitting at the level of crazy that Pinkie usually occupies, while Pinkie herself has escalated to the Discord tier. And an all-dialogue story is easier to handle when some of that dialogue actually makes sense.
Trixie gets Kool-Laid (Mature, Sex)
by The Nightingale
Exactly what it sounds like, but still a surprisingly entertaining random comedy.
So long as you accept its terrifying premise.
Regrets of a Princess (Everyone)
by thejboy88
A pretty standard Momlestia story (gave Twilight up at birth, etc), but still a well-written short on the topic. Unlike some, it focuses on Celestia’s guilt over giving her up and not telling her rather than Twilight finding out.
Everypony Dies (Deserves to be Teen/Gore, but tagged Mature)
by Syeekoh
A hilarious one-shot where Twilight witnesses all of her friends dying in increasingly-absurd ways, only to discover that it was all a dream. And then she wakes up and it all really happened except she’s actually still dreaming, because Luna is fucking with her.
Unfortunately, the hilarity seems to be unintentional, because in place of the Dark and Comedy tags it deserves, the author decided to go with Random and Tragedy.
To Be His Mare (Mature, Sex)
by Kamikakushi
Ugh. Couldn’t finish this one.
I wanted to like it. I really, really did. Dusk/Blitz dom/sub clopfic. That’s a string of wonderful right there.
Except Dusk is behaving nothing like Twilight, who he’s supposed to be a mirror of. He acts more like a particularly vile depiction of Blueblood.
Honestly. I have the feeling that what he does isn’t technically rape, but I couldn’t tell you what technicality saves it.
And in regards to the title, to paraphrase Macintosh in one of biologic orthodoxy's stories: "If I wanted you to be my mare, I'd go fuck a mare."
I’m tempted to right some R63 TwiDash of my own just to get the taste of this one out of my mouth. Is that a terrible turn of phrase when talking about male/male slashfic? Yes it is!
The Pinkie Pie Massacre (Mature, Gore)
by kalash93
A humanized alternative to “Too Many Pinkie Pies” where Twilight’s banishment spell fails, so the girls resort to Plan B - a good old-fashioned bullet to the head.
Half the time, the story is funny, mostly thanks to how ridiculously nonchalant Twilight, Dash, and Applejack are about shooting 30-some people in the head. Like Applejack, here: “The one on your left’s still movin’, Twi. Hit ‘er again.”
And then half the time it’s disturbing, as Pinkie realizes to her ever-growing horror that each and every clone is just as real as she is. But she doesn’t want to die, so she has to sit quietly and ignore the ones that cry or beg for their lives around her.
If the idea of mood whiplash between Dark and Comedy seems appealing to you, give this one a look.
