Koprulu Sector Characters · 7:58am Jul 9th, 2013
So which characters from the story do you guys like so far? I would hope all of them, but that's an impossibility. This is a way for me to get feed back for what I'm doing right and wrong. So please tell me who you do like and why, and who you don't like and why. I'm also open to suggestions, though no guarantee I'll act on them. Also if you bring up a character, please by all means let me know, how would you react to this story if that character died? Yes... people will die. Plot proof armor has to come off eventually.
Personally my favorite is Twilight. She's brilliant and always ahead of everyone else. Never directly hurts anyone, yet the cause of so much sorrow for everyone. That's the kind of mare I have to respect.
Sovereign is an enigma to me. I've gotten letters telling me they like this character, and frankly I don't know where I went right. To me he kind of seems like... an incompetent buffoon who is always getting himself into trouble. As a preserver, he has more knowledge than most ponies alive. Yet as a shut in growing up, he has next to zero life experience to temper it with. He just struck me as someone where I imagined people would be saying, "when is this guy going to die?"
Sovereign is bit pathetic yes, but that doesn't make him a bad character. Ron Weasley from Harry Potter is the same way. Sovereign is a comedy-relief in some aspects, such as being laid with mares he never wanted to do.
The CMC are great. Very canonical personalities when they grow up. Sweetie reminds me of Rarity. Scoots has the aggressive nature of RD which she is likely to take when she grows older. Bloom hasn't been in the story that much. So I can't say anything about her, only that she is loyal.
One guy that I will be sad if he dies is Starsong. He by far has the most Protoss personality in him. I really, really like how the Protoss hold themselves.
I kind of expect RD to die because it seems just reasonable......idk and well, when any of the Mane 6 die, (except Twilight in this case) I would be sad.
But the story must unfold and this is a Starcraft crossover so it won't be too happy and fun.
I think you are doing a pretty good job so far with the story. It has a good mix of characters with diffrent personalitys, the phaseing of the story works well in the way that it dose not feel rushed (I hate that in stories). I dont really have a favorite character but I whould love to see more from the zerg since I only play as zerg in starcraft
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That is so good to hear about the phasing. I am genuinely worried a lot of these chapters don't really move the story forward enough. They all do to a degree in at least a small way, but I know that many of them are simply dedicated to conversation, character background and world building, often at the cost of any action being taken. I'm trying to developed world and characters in those sections, but sometimes I do worry that it could leave people bored and saying, "I don't care about that stuff, just show me what happens next?!"
Granted I do want people to want to know what happens next, but as said, I do take a lot of chapter time away from story progress to world building and character development.
I know a lot of stories do rush it simply by using a paragraph where the writer just describes a characters personality, by saying, "this character is a brave and loyal person" or, "a selfish coward" but I hate doing that. Except for a quick description of physical appearance, I would prefer to leave all characters a blank slate during discriptions. I know it takes A LOT longer, but I would rather show it in actions and let the reader find out for him or her self. I could be wrong, but I don't think I've ever once described a characters personality in story through narrative. I never once said through narrative that Apple Bloom dedication to her friends well being sometimes clouds her judgment, or that Sovereign is inexperienced shut in, or that Twilight puts mission accomplishment above all sense of morality. I instead hoped to show it, and hoped that the reader eventually comes to those conclusions on their own.
I read through all the lore you had written up. I didn't even browse it, I read it... Which I consider quite the feat. Normally I just glance at background stuff to get a gist of what is going on, but what you had written fascinated me. Basically: I've really been enjoying any world building you have been putting into the story...
I like how you've taken such "general" lore and just thrown us into such a personal story in this world... By reading the lore sections, I pick up on a lot of references and implied remarks you make... Normally I would have attributed some of the vague sayings of the characters to just poor writing (the author getting the reference but not the reader) ... But in this case it is just brilliant, intentional or not.
About the characters:
I don't like Karn (er, Rain Sight's dad)... there isn't enough written with him to get a good read on his character and from what I've seen... meh... However, I feel he has a good setup to make a large impact on the Rain Sight/ Sovereign arc if something drastic happens to/with him.
I'm waiting for Sovereign to... have his moment, so to speak. With all the knowledge and Sweetie's tutoring, he could quickly become very dangerous if he would get his act together... but as he is now I kind of agree with your comments on him... but I kinda like the buffoon personality as it adds a bit of needed lightness/comedy to the story.
the CMC, Twilight are really good, keep it up... RD is alright, She's never been a big fan of mine but I feel like you are characterizing her well.
I like RD's sister though and would like to see more of her in action.
Rain Sight: I think she should stick around quite a while longer... I'd love to see her having to struggle with her zerg side a little... it would also be cool if she and sweetie become friends somehow, maybe because of Twilight... But I like how she has been portrayed and her character.
Lyra needs to go... I don't like her and how she's been set up... She's too crazy and it seems like we got kind of a bonnie and clyde thing going with her and bon bon.
Pinkie Pie is exactly how I imagined her, although I would be really careful about how far you take the "super powers" thing with her... I feel like if she gets out of her little bubble on the bridge of her ship things could get messy and hard to write.
I agree with Rametep and want to see more zerg in action... I'm waiting for the signature zerg explosion/invasion and everypony end up having to band together and fight them traditional Starcraft style... Zerg as pets doesn't seem like it will end well.
... That's my two cents on characters. I could probably go into more details but this is already a big comment and I would have to go back into chapters for more in depth stuff.
Either way, this story is great... FOR THE SWA-- I mean, All Hail the Starcraft!
Character wise my favorite one is Karn. True the fact that Dark Templar are the single greatest bad asses in the game lore for me acts a great role, despite not being fully backstoried, Karn has a lot of potential in the connections between most of the main characters. And for some unknown to me reason, he just feels bad ass to me(not counting the fact that he is a DT).
Honest to say, I think you pretty much got the reversed effect. Twilight has some great qualities, but she has become that one character people love to hate, and Sovereign...well...he is like Owen from TDI for example. That naive, gullable guy people just adore.
I really like the fact that you let character description do itself through the course of the story. Rushing stuff has it's moments, but it's not always a good thing. But to be honset, with your upload time taking the longer route is not a problem!