And I'm right back to being miserable. · 4:43am Sep 1st, 2023
So yeah, work's getting me down. AGAIN.
Between it being a holiday weekend and us being generally understaffed, I've been asked to come in tomorrow. On my day off. Second week in a row that I've only gotten one day off, and it's getting to me. And this is coupled with today having been super busy and one of the co-managers deciding to talk with me at length at the end of my shift, thus preventing me from getting all the necessary end-of-the-evening stuff done.
Now, before anyone starts worrying, I'm not in serious danger of losing my job. Said co-manager, in fact, seems to see potential in me, and claims that he wants to see me move up and become a supervisor. I myself am hesitant to do something like this, partly because I don't want that much responsibility and partly because I'm convinced that I don't have the capacity to be an effective leader. He thinks that I simply need to believe in myself a little more, and maybe that's true, but when I ask someone to do something and they fail to do so despite having a more than fair chance ahead of them to do it, I can't help but wonder.
In any case, not only was he talking with me about how I could be a supervisor and how he thought I could be great at it, and how things could be better in my department, and all sorts of other stuff, but this was going on for over an hour and a half. And in the process, not only was I prevented from getting the little nitty-gritty stuff done that makes things easier for people when they come in the next morning, but I was also kept late...by forty-five minutes. And this is the same co-manager who's complained about me taking too much overtime.
And, of course, the matter of my emotional control issues was brought up. I'm not gonna deny, I get angry, but are the reasons for this anger brought up or discussed? Is any effort made to address this issue, for me to explain exactly why I get angry? Nope. I'm just expected to deal with it.
So yeah, not in the happiest of moods. I feel like I'm not allowed to get anything done, mostly because I'm not allowed to get anything done. At home or at work.
Yay me.
"gives you the biggest hug I can manage"
If you ever need to talk, I'm right here.
5744843
I appreciate that, thank you. Right now, I'm just hoping that we can hire more people and my presence won't be nearly as required as it currently is.
Well... while I am relieved you're not in serious danger of losing your job, I am sorry things are being so difficult for you again.
For whatever it's worth, I don't fault you for your anger, as I understand that being in an environment where our buttons are constantly pushed and having to continuously shove down the reaction caused is difficult. I hope that at the very least things will go so that you start having a more tranquil work environment, and ideally also a bit more tranquility at home. You've more than earned both, I'd say.
Fingers crossed that the hope you mentioned of them hiring more people checks out, and that you manage to catch a very well-deserved break.
As always, wishing you the best on all fronts. :)
Take care.
5744984
Thank you. Right now, I'm just hoping that I can survive this next week.