The whole 'strip poker' setup is based entirely - obliquely - on a half-remembered television ad from years ago where a young woman very deliberately loses such a game to her manfriend and makes eyes at the bed only to have her clothes thrown back at her so they can keep playing.

Think it might have been a Playstation ad. Playstation 2? Could be wrong, was years ago.

Either way it apparently stuck with me, and now I've somehow turned it into more horse words. What have I become?

Meanwhile! Breaking news!

People continue to be very nice and turn my ridiculous bollocks into very swish out-loud versions of my ridiculous bollocks!

This one has gravitas. My mind went to 'That chap who used to tell you where you were about to mess up in Dungeon Keeper'* but that might just be me. Either way, delightful!

*_{He voices Peppa Pig's dad now, apparently?}

Aha! Got there!

1,000!

Uh, I'll - fuck...

I'll do something at some point! Probably. People do things, right? On the internet? When milestones are reached?

How very uplifting!

Also, belatedly, I notice that I'm creeping towards 1,000 followers or...watchers or...whatever they're called on here. Huh.

Most people I've ever had vaguely paying attention to me. Am I meant to do something when it gets there? Is there a process?

Do I buy the cake?

I'm new at this.

I'm so tired...

I wrote a (non-pony) thingy for a laugh and sent it to my mother (because I have no audience for anything non-fanfiction related) and she said it was good but worried about the "anxiety" and "sense of invasion" in it and asked if I was okay.

I wrote it for a laugh, damnit!

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Also, thinking back, it amuses me greatly to think that one of the main reasons for the bloated, meandering length of Bedbound is that, at the time, I was all "Ah, I want a dude hugging Celestia but I really gots to lay the groundwork first" and nowadays I'm just stumbling in with "Ah I dunno they're just there fuckit."

That's either a sign of personal growth (or regression, maybe) or a sign that I am mercurial and inconsistent.

The flagrant Clutch reference in "I don't care how you get them" was all a ruse to distract from the more oblique Use Of Weapons reference! Muwhahaha! I win again!

Blaow! Back once again with the renegade master. Ahem.

I do like these. Seems kind of masturbatory to listen back to something that I wrote, but hell, who's going to stop me? You? You're not allowed within two meters! You can't get close enough to stop me!

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Seems like a strange story to read but fuck, man, I ain't complaining.

Also, I know I'm the dickhead who wrote the thing but, hearing it read, I can't help but crack up because it's just such a dumb fucking story.

Does rather amuse me that the responses to My Wall are broadly divided between people feeling they've missed something and people make jokes about digging. Both are delightful.

Though, honestly, you haven't missed anything. It is about exactly what it looks like it's about.

Honest.