Ace Swift Wasn't Evil

by Misty Shadow

Derpy's Testimony

In the unknown regions of the Everfree Forest, precedented time being 8:00 PM...

“I think it’s about time to end this little game, guys...” said Derpy Hooves after she had teleported them all to the destination. “I shall tell you everything...”

Derpy began her cross-eyed examination with a testimony.

How Did It All Happen?

-Ace Swift’s accomplice was not Sonata like you have been led to believe...it was actually ME!

-Sonata was actually Ace Swift’s master...with her knowledge of the dark arts, she made Ace Swift a slave of them. But Ace didn’t mind being a dark magician, for his goal was to be number one. Besides...he and Sonata just so happened to be BFF’s, Best Friends Forever!

-There was just one problem with their friendship...Sonata didn’t want any children. This was bad for Ace, because to truly be number one for generations to come, he needed to have kids to pass down his legacy of the dark arts of blackmail to. Even though he was a love addict, none of the mares he offered to love agreed to help him. And that’s where I came in...

-He arranged a secret meeting with me, his sister and a Celestial official secretly granted magical powers disguised as Ponyville’s #1 Mail Courier, and discussed his plan...His plan for me to help him conceive his children and become a mother and father...

-He had written ten letters addressed to the ten mares who had previously refused his offer, this time planning to use a bit of force...

-He knew I was a whitemailer, the antithesis of a blackmailer. Unlike a blackmailer who sends evil letters to ponies threatening to expose their secrets, a whitemailer sends nice letters promising good fortunes to their receivers, which with the power of TRUE MAGIC come true when the sender reads them, creating secrets that will ironically destroy that receiver’s life forever...

-He gave me the letters to lace with TRUE MAGIC and send to the ten mares. Inside each letter, this message was written.....

“Dear “Mare’s” Name,

Greetings, Mia More. I have come to humbly accept your opinion. Even though you don’t like children, that’s your own personal opinion to have about your own personal offspring. Instantaneously after reading this, you will give birth to an adult named “Child’s Name”. “Nominative Gender” will be a “Nominative Gender”, and “Nominative Gender” will also be an adult when “Nominative Gender” is formed inside of you because I am not good at parenting. When “Nominative Gender” comes out of you, have “Objective Gender” read this part that says “Nominative Gender” must come to meet Ace Swift in Canterlot at once for “Personal Gender”’s destiny to be decided. Thank you.

Love,

Ace Swift

-When the mares read the letters, the magic of the whitemail worked at one cost...their bellies were ruptured. After the TRUE MAGIC from the letter backfired and turned them into zombies, they lost all conscience of what had happened. Thankfully, I gained control of them and turned them into my servants, as Ace did with his children when Sonata found out about him being a whitemailing cheater...

-He was in big trouble...so much trouble that Sonata forced him to punish his children by making him have them be an active part of the blackmailing scheme with the Equestrian 500. Maybe that’s why Cruise Control hates Ace so much, especially with his mother being a young girl who didn’t have enough mental strength to lose her conscience and become a zombie, but that’s a different story!

-One different story I’d like to bring up is when Trixie did her research on this and found out about me being an evil mother who tried to “steal” her brother’s legacy upon his death. When she confronted me about it, I warned her to throw the case and the trial or there would be consequences...

-But she didn’t listen, and so I was forced to dispose of her! Oh, what a tragedy the Ugly and Stupid Trixie has to suffer now, all because of her foolish lust for power!

-Fortunately for me, my dream for power will come true, for I have you guys here to revive my friend, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me and him from ruling the word as black and white magician siblings! MWA DAH HA HA HA!

Upon hearing this long testimony, Twilight and Phoenix just laughed.

“Ha ha...?” Derpy said sheepishly. “What’s so funny? What’s with that positive reaction?! STOP SNICKERING!”

“”Derpy”, you’re pitiful...” Phoenix and Twilight said confidently as they wagged their pointers. “You’ve shocked us enough to get us to believe a story that is the definition of a contradiction, but if you think you can get us to believe a tale with not one, but TWO statements containing TWO glaring inconsistencies, you’re sadly mistaken...”

“What?” Derpy replied nervously. “H-How?!”

“We don’t think we need to tell you...” the heroes both chuckled. “We think it would be better to SHOW you!”

That moment was when Twilight and Phoenix presented the statements that proved who the real villain in all this was.....and that’s the end of this story! Unless...you want more. If you want to be the kind of hero who stays with the heroes until the end, watch the two inconsistent statements be revealed! Please do not stop now, a true bad ending is in sight!

The Ending of Bad Ending With Story.