a gildaxoc story I've been waiting for one of these

Ok. I think I know the sources of the thumb downs (hear me out.)

Seems a bit choppy, could use some smoothing over, some details added, some spaces between paragraphs. Mainly the choppy/abruptness is disconcerting at some points. Maybe a proof-reader/editor? (nothing major, just smoothing out sentence structure,) Adding details would really help too.

Also, some people don't like Gilda with anyone.

That being said....I look forward to seeing where this story goes!

2266913 Really? It doesn't seem anymore patchy than my first story to me. I'll look into that, though, so thanks for the input.
2266403 I'm happy to appeal to your fantasies. ...I guess...

2268143
No problem! Not so much patchy, as choppy (doesn't seem smooth at points....)