Null-Magic Pegasus

by Scors

Chapter 1 - Meet the Doc

"I apologize for the wait. Normally the doctors are very punctual," the receptionist softly stated over a curved redwood desk, her magenta eyes darting between the two ponies in the room. Her voice felt like soft, frayed velvet to the ears of the young filly on the couch.

Yeah, good comparison, the small silver pegasus internally chided as she nodded to the purple mare, noting the tall, noble-esque purple and pink mane. Maybe next time you could compare a voice to being flattened by a steamroller.

--No... Wait... I've done that. The filly smiled inwardly, holding her bored expression on the outside. Being a member of the Silver family she was conditioned to separate internal emotion from external expression. That made it harder for anypony to "read" the Silvers.

The filly's eyes wandered about lazily, landing on her hooves and eyeing the feathering around them. The thin hairs were neat and trimmed, flowing from just above her fetlocks to the base of her horseshoes. While feathering was rare within her family, Silver had been taught to trim it every day to avoid picking up mud and dirt as she walked. It was one of the few things Silver couldn't change about herself... not that she'd tried very hard to.

Faint silver-blue strands of mane fell over the filly's eyes as she was looking over her feathering so she tried puffing at them to move the strands, but could not get them to move. Silver's mane was a faint blue, complimented by another blue that was just two shades darker. Most ponies couldn't discern the faint coloring of her mane from her coat, so they mistook her as a pure silver-grey pony. The filly kept trying to quietly move her mane, but eventually gave up and let it be. Usually her mane was not this difficult to manage, reaching halfway down her neck in the back and just long enough to cover her eyes in the front. The bangs were normally swept up behind her left ear and stayed there, but the rainy weather that day had made the entire mass rebellious. Admitting defeat only to herself the filly looked around the small square room she occupied, trying her best to ignore the fidgeting brown stallion across from her.

The waiting room for the clinic matched the size of Silver's apartment, with enough room to seat a dozen ponies comfortably, not including the receptionist. Modern art adorned the walls, swirling in vibrant pastel colors that had no apparent pattern. The furniture was all built of redwood, like most aspects of the clinic's unique decor, and was complimented with white cushions for ponies to rest and wait. Silver had taken the couch to the left of the royal oak entrance doors, furthest from the receptionist's desk. Another set of doors leading to the rest of the clinic sat across the small square room, mirroring their partners perfectly. The receptionist's convex redwood desk was inset into the wall on the far side of them, its slight curve the only intrusion into the waiting room's rectangular shape.

Silver caught the receptionist quickly looking down at her desk again, shuffling papers with her hooves in an effort to appear busy. The filly knew better though, as the receptionist wasn't the first to be curious about her eyes. Most ponies weren't used to seeing silver-grey irises on ponies; not naturally, anyway. Silver hid a smile, picturing what the mare would do if she saw Silver's true eyes, which were, as her sister had once said, "pools of liquid mercury reflecting the light of a silver cloud." Without the contacts Silver had in, many ponies immediately assumed she was blind and usually steered clear of the filly.

The clinic, like many in the large cities of Equestria, was very well-funded, evidenced by the Celestia Era mural that adorned its domed ceiling, surrounded by pure white squinches to support it. The mural depicted Celestia herself standing upon a blue and green orb, representing Equestria, with the sun and moon above her spread wings and the stars twinkling in the dark sky around her. Earth ponies stood at the monarch's hooves while a golden band denoted the edge of the dome, carved pegasi and unicorns encircling the magnificent work. Silver imagined that the mural was going to be changed sometime soon, given Princess Luna's return within the past year and the events since.

The ceiling was the first thing that Silver had noticed upon entering the clinic, the golden band catching her eye. The second was of Princess Celestia's cutie mark upon the otherwise pristine white carpet, stretching from one side of the small room to the other. If only she could do some redecorating with some fire then a coat of paint, the filly could learn to like the place. Sadly Silver could not share these thoughts with anypony else; apparently normal ponies didn't really think that way.

"I hope she gets here soon," the stallion muttered, breaking into Silver's thoughts. She glanced over in time to see him run his hoof through his short, gray mane. The stallion had been there since Silver arrived, but she was trying her best to ignore him. It wasn't working.

"As do I," the receptionist replied. Silver noted a subtle tone of fear and apprehension in the response, but only the filly noticed. Silver also knew the receptionist had nothing to worry about. The earth stallion was obviously strong, but he wasn't trained. Not like Silver. And she had at least a quarter-second reaction time on him in her relaxed state; more than enough to avoid anything he tried.

"I wonder what's keeping them," Silver asked the floor. This was her first visit to a psychologist since she had left home abruptly and already it wasn't going well.

The doctor was already thirty minutes late for their scheduled appointment. Add on top of that this stallion whose constant muttering and obvious addiction to some substance or another made it difficult for the filly to remain passive. She could catch every word along with every heartbeat from that stallion, no matter how hard she tried to block them out. Silver could feel her patience waning, though not quite enough to be irritated.

After a few more minutes of mumbling to himself about needing this or that, Silver really didn't care, the stallion got up and almost ran the small length of the room to the receptionist's desk, firmly planting his forehooves on it. Silver's ears perked as her body's muscles tensed. Battle reflexes, second nature for the filly of a war-buff father.

"Look, maybe you can help me here. I really need my prescription. Like now. I'm feeling myself slip away, I need those meds, man! I need them!" The stallion slammed his hoof on the desk.

The receptionist leaned away from the stallion, just out of reach of his forelegs. "I am sorry but I cannot prescribe or distribute any medications. Only your doctor can do that, and she assured me she wanted to evaluate your progress first," the purple pony stated plainly. She hid her concern well, Silver gave her props for that, but her posture literally screamed 'Crazy pony is totally going to attack me!'

Wow, Silver, talking about simplifying things, Silver thought to herself with a smile as she slid off the couch, moving silently along the wall next to the desk. The stallion didn't notice either detail.

"Don't lie to me. I know you can give me the prescription. Just hand it over and you can tell Doctor Foxxe I am fine."

Well that's obvious, right? He's totally fine and yet he's in a cold sweat, I can literally hear his bones rattling, and his heartbeat has jumped by at least forty beats per minute. Totally fine, right? Silver mused in her head, silently standing beside the brown stallion. He hadn't noticed the filly's move, and that worked just fine.

"Look, I'm sorry, but I can't do that," the receptionist said more sternly, still leaning away from the pony in front of her.

This is where the brown stallion in front of Silver finally lost it, letting out two yells in quick succession, one of rage as he started to reach for the receptionist over the desk followed by one of surprise as Silver bucked him against the wall before his hooves moved an inch.

"Tranquilizers, now," Silver firmly said as the stallion got back up, holding his head in one hoof. The receptionist nodded immediately, disappearing quickly.

Despite having just bucked a pony over half again her weight, and him now being a complete ball of unstable and uncontrolled rage, Silver was remarkably calm. She had made the first move, and now the rest was this stallion's. Silver already knew he was going to do something stupid, assuming he didn't waste the moment.

"Why you rotten little runt," the stallion screamed at Silver, who was sitting on her haunches, appearing totally relaxed on the surface. Underneath, her well-trained muscles were prepared for anything this stallion might try.

"Yeah, I haven't heard that one before," Silver retorted, rolling her eyes as she counted the seconds it took for the receptionist to get the sedative. "Can we just save the short jokes, please? I'm not in the mood." The stallion huffed, his brown, bloodshot eyes glaring at Silver with a powerful rage. The filly returned the glare with a bored expression. She really, really wanted this guy to try something fast.

"You're not in the mood?" He asked in a low, angry voice. "YOU'RE NOT IN THE MOOD?!" That time it was loud enough to make Silver's sensitive ears twitch.

The filly tilted her head down and shook it, hiding the smile she had from knowing she'd gotten to him. His attention was devoted solely to her.

Perfect.

The stallion took a step forward, then dropped to the floor as he passed out. Silver watched as his head fell the small distance to the carpet and his eyes close, a dumb grin on his face from being dosed with a powerful sedative. Above his rump a syringe floated in a bright pink aura. Ah, so she's a unicorn, Silver thought to herself. Her horn must be under the ridiculous mane.

"Are you alright?" the receptionist asked over the desk, eyeing the filly for any apparent injuries. Silver noticed how her gaze lingered on the filly’s eyes for a second longer than she should have.

Silver nodded, deciding to stay polite rather than asking 'What took you so long?! Was the bathroom occupied or something?'. In her mind Silver knew the receptionist had done nothing wrong, but even so she was still ready and searching for a fight. Taking a deep, quiet breath the pegasus managed to restrain herself, letting her body relax while her outward demeanor remained polite and friendly.

"I am terribly--" The receptionist began to apologize, but stopped when Silver raised her hoof.

"It's no problem," the silver pony said quietly, "I got myself involved." And with that, Silver cantered over to the white couch again and hopped onto it, laying her forelegs off the edge and her head on top of them once again.

A couple minutes later a pair of white unicorn stallions in matching white coats came in and magically levitated the unconscious brown stallion away, leaving Silver to finally enjoy the peace of the waiting room. She closed her eyes and let her mind fade, only listening to the sounds around her. Silver heard the receptionist magically typing on her keys, the clicking erratic as well as rapid. A phonograph playing from within the clinic reached the filly's ears, a sense of rhythm coming with it, but it was muffled by the walls and the distance. The light pitter-patter of the rain outside began once again, accompanied by hooves splashing as ponies moved quickly to find shelter from the fresh sprinkle.

The ticking of the clock behind the receptionist's desk slowly filled Silver's mind, its sound repetitive, consistent and predictable. Slowly, the other noises of the room began to fade as her mind focused in on the ticking, finally able to drift into the small void in her mind reserved for the deepest of thoughts. Stories were buried around it, and as she arrived began taking shape within that empty space. The worlds she'd read about as a filly formed around her, blending into one another almost seamlessly. The filly remembered the stories of tiny creatures gathering pollen for their home. The mighty knights of old, before the peace of Equestria, fighting for lovely maidens and their honor against the evils of distant lands. Silver felt herself begin to smile as she wandered the worlds within her mind, filling her own ideas into where the stories had felt empty.

A loud bang from the front doors jolted Silver from her trance, her entire body moving in one massive twitch that nearly threw the filly onto the floor. Her eyes sprang open, turning quickly to the now-open door that led to the outside. Silver forced herself to relax as she watched two ponies walk into the room, chatting quietly with one another.

The mare was a brilliant orange, the kind one would see on a prairie fox. Her deep red mane curled up in front and flowed down her back, ending in thin strands on her shoulder. Her tail matched in color and was almost twice as long. Her cutie mark was of a baby fox curled around a small, empty syringe. This mare should've been a vet if her cutie mark was the only thing to go by. She was very tidy and clean, not to mention dry; something Silver could admire considering the damp weather outside. The mare's amber eyes did not stray from her coworker as he held the door open for her.

The stallion was another story. He was impressive, sporting a flame-red coat that was damp from the rain outside, making it seem a shade darker than it was. Muscles were evident underneath the surface as he bowed respectfully to the mare before him. His dark blue mane was drenched, though being short it held no shape upon his head to begin with. His cutie mark was a chaise in the same color scheme as its bearer: a deep blue cushion sitting upon a sturdy redwood frame. When the stallion opened his eyes from the small bow he'd given his fellow doctor, Silver was slightly taken aback by how vibrant his sapphire blue eyes were. They seemed to glow from within, emanating a warm, safe feeling. It wasn't something Silver was used to seeing in sapphire eyes that vibrant.

"Thank you, Doc. My mane appreciates your walking me to work," the mare said in a light, cheerful tone. Silver could compare it to silk or velvet (again), being smooth to even her overly-sensitive ears. "I owe you one," the mare added with a sly wink.

The stallion merely smiled as he stepped into the small waiting room from the light rain outside, letting the door close behind him as he did so. He spoke in a strong but soft voice, the kind that sent young fillies to sleep with nothing but sugar cubes in their dreams. Silver could feel her mind drifting as he spoke, and had to force herself back to reality. "Any time Doctor Foxxe, I am always happy to help out a friend." The stallion glanced around the room before continuing on a less soothing note. "Though I think you might need more than just me to find your patient."

The mare, 'Foxxe', looked around as well, her eyes catching the pony on the couch for a split second before turning back to her coworker. "Oh, dear. He's probably sedated in the back. I do apologize, but I must tend to him. I hope we can talk after work, Doc?"

"Certainly," the stallion named Doc, replied. "Go see to your patient."

The mare ran off quickly, her red tail disappearing through the door to the rest of the clinic. Silver suppressed a minor spike of anger towards her. Despite being a unicorn, the receptionist probably couldn't have handled the obvious addict; especially not with him being that out of control. The fact that Foxxe decided to be late just for a stallion and risking not only her receptionist but any other patient that could have been in the waiting room didn't score any points with Silver.

"Great mare, sadly she can't take a small hint," Doc said quietly into Silver's ear. The filly kept her composure despite the soothing voice, its effects losing potency with every word.

"You weren't giving her any hint, you know," Silver replied in a low voice.

"Well pardon me for being polite. You must be Quick Silver."

The filly visibly flinched at the use of her full name. "Silver is fine," the filly stated.

"Alright," Doc said with a small nod, "I'm Doc. A pleasure to meet you, Silver." The filly nodded in reply. "Shall we get started, then? My office is in the back."

The silver filly slid off the couch again as Doc walked towards the door that led to the rest of the clinic. Silver noted the receptionist's typewriting falter a little as Doc passed, like she just realized he was there. The filly didn't give it another thought, though, given that the purple unicorn had been busy typing the entire time.

The hallway beyond reminded Silver of those that a hospital would usually have: White tile flooring, blank white walls, and matching doors spaced perfectly apart from one another. The ceiling was the most exciting part, playing host to a single blue line that ran down the center of its length. A light was inset into the ceiling along this line every few hoof-lengths to keep the hallway brightly lit. Silver was glad that the lights in the clinic were electrical; opposed to the firefly alternative most of the city still ferociously clung to.

"I'm assuming your parents are coming, or have at least been informed," Doc said over his shoulder.

"No, no, and I would prefer they not find out I'm here. Or anywhere, for that matter," Silver replied coolly. She could hear the cold hatred in her own voice as her mind turned towards them. The mere thought of what they meant to her filled the filly with an anger that no other pony could get out of her. "I'm only a few more months away from freedom. I'm not about to give that up."

"You know, legally--"

Silver wasn't about to hear it. She jumped over the stallion, giving her wings a quick beat before landing in front of Doc, her gaze as steely cold as the filly could muster. "I. Don't. Care." Silver stated, emphasizing each word. She was ready to buck the unimpressed psychologist straight through a wall, which would be extremely satisfying, and easy, for the young filly.

Immediately realizing what she was doing, the filly closed her eyes and took in a deep breath, trying to reign in her uncultured side before it was fully released. Silver didn't feel any regret about her outburst. If anything it would hammer home the point that she wasn't about to let her parents find her, even at the risk of running from yet another city. Even at the risk of losing almost everything she'd gained.

Silver took in a second breath, forcing herself to remember what she would really be losing, realizing that it wasn't worth the risk. Before she'd come to Manehattan running had been easy. She didn't need material objects and bits weren't exactly plentiful for her so they were easy to move around. But now she had something more to lose, and that got Silver thinking about whether she could leave again if she had to. The filly had no idea whether running or staying scared her more.

Silver took in a third breath, letting the calm and quiet of the clinic fill her mind, driving out her speeding thoughts. She forced her body to relax by folding her wings, feeling the expected stinging from her wing tips. She sat on her haunches, opening her eyes a bit to look at the floor. "Sorry," Silver said in a small whisper, "things have been..." The filly tried to find the right words to explain the past two years.

"It's alright. I'm guessing an earth pony?"

"Unicorns," Silver replied simply, knowing Doc was referring to her parents.

"Both of them?" Not an iota of surprise from the stallion.

A small nod from the filly as she backed against one of the side walls, giving Doc room to pass. He didn't move a step; instead he kept his focus on Silver, his eyes showing a mix of understanding and tenacity. The small filly realized Doc wasn't going to let this go. Not just yet.

"If it helps, I understand. My father was a unicorn as well. We didn't have the best of relationships, either. Look, if your parents by some chance ask me about you, I have to tell them or I risk losing my license. But unless they can prove without a doubt they're your parents I can promise you anything you say here will be kept in confidence."

Silver nodded, feeling a little ashamed about her outburst now. "I understand," the filly whispered, "I'm sorry."

The corner of Doc's mouth slid into a half-smile. "Quite alright," he said, "but I must admit you have quite a bit of control over your temper. Especially for a pegasus."

Silver's turn to smile, albeit weakly, as she looked at Doc once again. Even as she sat, he was still a good half a hoof taller than her, though the filly had gotten used to it. "Thank you, though it isn't enough. I still can't-- Wait, what do you mean by 'especially for a pegasus'?" Silver raised her hoof, pointing at the psychologist in front of her as she was processing what he'd actually said.

"Pegasi are a warrior race, you're more prone to outbursts than any other," Doc replied simply. After a moment he added, "Obvious that's a very generalized statement, but we have to know these things."

Silver shook her head, half-smiling at the Doc. She knew he was right, but it was kind of nice to find somepony in Equestria actually had the guts to say it out loud then stand behind his words. That scored a few points there, which brought Doc up to "somewhat-likable" status.

"Perhaps we can discuss this in my office, and out of the middle of the clinic's hallway," Doc said with a small smile. "I don't think the nurses would be overly happy if we had our session out here. It's just down there," he said with a slight nod down the way, indicating the dark red door at the end of the clinic's brightly lit hallway. "Not too far, right?"

Silver looked down the hallway again, seeing the door standing there and decided it was best to save her thoughts for the chaise. The filly began walking down the hallway again, Doc right beside her, keeping pace. She had so many thoughts swimming through her head. What was she going to tell him? What was she not going to tell him? Should anything in one category be moved to the other? So much had happened the past two years that Silver decided not to drag Doc through all of it. She'd just share the last couple of days, and almost everything associated. Some things had to be left out, though.

Doc pressed down on the brass handle of the redwood door and pushed it open, moving aside to let the pegasus through first. Silver nodded in thanks as she took the offer, sliding past him with her mind finally made up.

The office beyond was about what Silver had expected. It was small yet cozy. The window across from the door took up a majority of its wall, giving the room a more open feeling and a good view over the city of Manehatten. The other walls were covered by books along shelves, unseen behind the dark red and black bindings. Despite the darker colors, Silver couldn't help but feel slightly elated at the sight of them.

In front of the window across from Silver sat a well-polished redwood desk, glistening in the faint rays of morning sun that broke through the gloomy cover of gray in the sky. In the middle of the room sat a beautiful redwood coffee table, its legs carved with intricate patterns that Silver couldn't quite make out. The top was as smooth as glass, and reflected the white ceiling like a mirror.

On one side of the coffee table, a few hooves between itself and its neighbor bookcase, was the classic chaise. This one looked just like Doc's cutie mark, its legs and frame built of redwood. The deep blue cushions were flawless, and seemed to be made of silk to allow the patient ample comfort. The carvings that Silver could see on the legs seemed to tell stories of ponies wielding strange objects; swords according to her father's books, and faced off against dragons and other ponies. Where and how Doc could have gotten the chaise, Silver wasn't sure, but the stories upon it were definitely not Equestrian.

Across the coffee table, sitting at a slight angle towards both the window and the chaise, was the traditional, over-elegant psychiatrist's chair. This one complemented the chaise splendidly with its soft, pristine blue-silk cushions and the deep, redwood frame. The chair did not appear to have any carvings on it anywhere, so it was not quite a perfect match to its partner.

The filly took a step into the room, still admiring the bookcases around her and was surprised to find a plush carpet beneath her hooves. She looked down at its small form beneath her hooves, not much bigger than a doormat. The gentle fibers brushing at her hooves felt different from the tile floor: warm and inviting. The same could be said of the design, lines of reds and yellows, all diving their way down the woven hole in the center, disappearing into a small black void.

"I wouldn't stare into that," Doc stated from behind Silver, "I've had patients completely lose themselves in there. Most came back, though." The filly turned her head to the side, a look of query asking the question for her. "If they're prepared, this carpet can be very helpful. Unprepared, however, and more drastic measures may be needed. Rewards outweighing risks, so to speak. Also really useful for the less stable ones," he added under his breath, thinking Silver wouldn't hear. She had to suppress a smile as she looked into the center of the carpet one last time.

Silver walked over to the chaise, her eyes looking over the carvings on the legs and wooden frame. The scenes depicted seemed to be of two different stories, one starting from the left side and one from the right, both reading towards the center of the chaise. The pony of the left wielded blades strapped to their hooves, not swords as the filly had first thought, against a large creature, similar to a Scylla, if Silver's memory was accurate, but with only one head instead of multiple. The other pony was more interesting, however, as it seemed to be a hooded figure wielding a farmer's scythe. It held the scythe across its front, standing on its back hooves and facing what appeared to be a dragon, only it seemed more like a decayed corpse than a real threat. The two stories depicted scenes from their respective battles, with both ending with the enemies of the ponies standing back-to-back in the center and the ponies staring their foes down from either side. Something seemed odd about the pony with the blades, however; like Silver knew her. Somehow.

"I hope it's comfortable enough for you. I recently had it restored, and after my last trip a cardboard box would seem comfortable," Doc said from his own chair, pulling a pad and pen from beneath the cushion.

Silver climbed onto the chaise, being careful to keep her hooves off the edge as she lay on it. "It's wonderful," the filly said as she laid her head onto the cushions above, closing her eyes and enjoying the softest seat she'd been in for over two years. Silver expected the stallion to press a little for her story, but he seemed to be waiting patiently for her to settle in. Another point in this guy's favor, she thought to herself. Maybe this won't be so bad.

Opening her eyes, Silver looked out the window over the city, admiring the buildings as she started. At first she began like any other story, setting up the scene and her background, but it slowly became a rambling; she just began sharing her thoughts as her mind sank deeper into memory, getting lost in the dark corners of her mind. Eventually she lost herself in those small areas, buried behind the secrets within and just rambling away.