I'm sorry. It's actually mostly done, but it takes me HOURS to proofread this stuff. I have this really bad habit of getting into the protagonist's head, and then I start writing in present tense, and the only way I can fix it is by reading my own writing 100 times over.
You seem to have found a way to take all the fun out of sex with the mane 6... which is an impressive feat. I don't really want to keep reading, but I'd be lying if I didn't say I was morbidly curious about how the rest are going to destroy the experience for the poor brony.
Oh, excellent! If you wouldn't mind going into the future, downloading the finished story, and bringing the files back to me, it'd save me a bunch of time, and wouldn't be a reckless misuse of the TARDIS.
Aww... I hope I'm not taking all the fun out of it. Then again, this scenario is set up to be fun for them, not for him; it's six girls trying to entertain themselves, rather than a brothel.
1571620 ^this I´m not sure what to think about your clopfic. Ok it is a Clopfic, so the Story should make no difference, but.... I don´t know... - its almost rape - "hahaha look at the stupid Human, he´s so weird and stupid and pathetically" - she bit him? risk to ripped off his member? possibly ass rape in next cpt? now pain is permits?
don´t get me wrong! Your writing is good ! But why I feel bad when I read it ? And why can I not stop?
I hope he wokes up in the last cpt and everything was a dream.
1572129 Perhaps not all the fun, but you're venturing into some pretty squicky territory. Rarity's chapter started making me feel pretty uneasy and if you're going into ass rape as it appears you might be.....
I'm a firm believer in the idea of sex being enjoyable for all that are involved, and while the ponies at least seem to be enjoying it, your protagonist seems to be getting the shaft, currently metaphorically, and quite possibly literally in the future.
At the end, have him make a monologue that he may have not made the best example for humans. Then, give a window of opportunity for a follow-up story. If you know what I mean.
I suspect things might get a little better after Fluttershy. Just a little. And he's still yet to actually say 'no' to anything. Twi's an ethical pony, and I'm sure she'd let him quit and send him home if he asked.
Oh, the story is always important. I don't know why I went in this direction, but it honestly seems more realistic than the usual 'human appears in Equestria, ponies aim to please him, human goes home.' Rarity is probably the only one bordering on the crazy/sadistic side.
(I'm an ass. Starts reading and chapter five is up. I don't have much suspense.) SHOVE IT UP HIS ASS FLUTTERSHY! Okay, I am being told by a "certain" pony to say a few words and use and emoticon. Here it is.
THIS. IS. SPARTA! Happy now? Luna can be such a jerk sometimes... Whoops, said something I shouldn't.
THE SUSPENCE
1569369
I'm sorry. It's actually mostly done, but it takes me HOURS to proofread this stuff. I have this really bad habit of getting into the protagonist's head, and then I start writing in present tense, and the only way I can fix it is by reading my own writing 100 times over.
Give his dick a break..... but not his ass....
1569422
...
...
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
She gonna make you squeal like a pig, boy.
1569682
Fluttershy would never do such things. She's just preparing her vuvuzela for a fifteen-minute long solo.
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT
ohhhhh you sly dog
1569951
Riiiiiight, and I'm the King of Spain.
I am the king of my world. And I approve this story.
1570179
1570524
I'm glad to hear that my fic is getting so much support from royalty. It means a lot!
1570529
That too...
Well I'm the lord of time and I say this fic should have MOAR CHAPTERZ! :D
You seem to have found a way to take all the fun out of sex with the mane 6... which is an impressive feat. I don't really want to keep reading, but I'd be lying if I didn't say I was morbidly curious about how the rest are going to destroy the experience for the poor brony.
1571613
Oh, excellent! If you wouldn't mind going into the future, downloading the finished story, and bringing the files back to me, it'd save me a bunch of time, and wouldn't be a reckless misuse of the TARDIS.
1571620
Aww... I hope I'm not taking all the fun out of it. Then again, this scenario is set up to be fun for them, not for him; it's six girls trying to entertain themselves, rather than a brothel.
1570529 I try to think otherwise ;(
its called trying to have hope in humanity
its a very hard thing to do
1572129
I cooouuuld, but where's the fun in that? ;)
1571620
^this
I´m not sure what to think about your clopfic. Ok it is a Clopfic, so the Story should make no difference, but.... I don´t know...
- its almost rape
- "hahaha look at the stupid Human, he´s so weird and stupid and pathetically"
- she bit him? risk to ripped off his member? possibly ass rape in next cpt? now pain is permits?
don´t get me wrong! Your writing is good !
But why I feel bad when I read it ? And why can I not stop?
I hope he wokes up in the last cpt and everything was a dream.
1572129
Perhaps not all the fun, but you're venturing into some pretty squicky territory. Rarity's chapter started making me feel pretty uneasy and if you're going into ass rape as it appears you might be.....
I'm a firm believer in the idea of sex being enjoyable for all that are involved, and while the ponies at least seem to be enjoying it, your protagonist seems to be getting the shaft, currently metaphorically, and quite possibly literally in the future.
In the words of Princess Molestia: Prepare your anus!
Well some one is getting raped up the ass ... .. Poor brony doesnt know what hell he is in ...
At the end, have him make a monologue that he may have not made the best example for humans. Then, give a window of opportunity for a follow-up story. If you know what I mean.
1572956
I suspect things might get a little better after Fluttershy. Just a little. And he's still yet to actually say 'no' to anything. Twi's an ethical pony, and I'm sure she'd let him quit and send him home if he asked.
1572792
Oh, the story is always important. I don't know why I went in this direction, but it honestly seems more realistic than the usual 'human appears in Equestria, ponies aim to please him, human goes home.' Rarity is probably the only one bordering on the crazy/sadistic side.
1573478
Relevant avatar as well. Good show.
1574637
Fluttershy is incapable of rape. No may mean no, but you just try saying no to this face:
1575601
An encore? I could try...
(I'm an ass. Starts reading and chapter five is up. I don't have much suspense.) SHOVE IT UP HIS ASS FLUTTERSHY! Okay, I am being told by a "certain" pony to say a few words and use and emoticon. Here it is.
THIS. IS. SPARTA! Happy now? Luna can be such a jerk sometimes... Whoops, said something I shouldn't.