Pinkie's Guide to Greater Equestria

by GrangeDisplay

Prologue: Adult Fear

The following is an account of events as it could have happened.

This is a story born of a split-second decision that reverberates throughout the lives of many. Perhaps it is bold to say that this ‘shift’ could cause such catastrophic change. Especially when choices tend to accumulate, supersede, and beget each other. After a certain point, things get so entangled that it is difficult to cite which choice was truly the most monumental.

But this is one of the downfalls of a limited point of view, the inability to know all of the choices that preceded yours and all those that follow. The best anyone can do is pick their preferred path and do their best.

The history leading to this choice, as it has happened, is well known. The leaders of the three pony tribes choose to set aside their differences, creating the unified nation of Equestria. The survivors of the Windigoes' winter dispersed throughout the young nation, developing into unique communities and cultures. The Bearers of the Sun and Moon ascend the throne through ill-explored means.

Fast forward a great sum of time when a pegasus foal is bullied at Flight camp. The sky briefly erupts in an explosive array of colors, and several fillies discover their purpose. One of these foals finds herself radically displaced from her peers, so much so that her family decides to set her free.

And so, now Cloudy Quartz lays awake in her bed on a cool summer night on the eve of her daughter's departure.

She too, like all things, is the product of choices. The descendant of those who survived the long winter and inheritor of the way of the Plain. To be Plain is to be ascribed to a lifestyle as flat, austere, and gray as the lands they tended. A legacy shared by those who lived in the southwestern regions of Equestria just above the treacherous Arimasti Territory and next to the arid San Palomino desert.

Cloudy knew that it was ill-advised to stay up, especially when the day brought on so much work, but she could not ease her restlessness. By the sound of it, nopony could. She never thought she would miss the noise of snoring, but it gave the house a strange late-night heartbeat that would be much more irritating if it were not so familiar and comforting.

Now, as everypony lay awake, the house was disturbingly quiet. Cloudy’s covers rustled as she turned over in her bed and stared into the endless darkness of her room. The fragile silence within the house was utterly suffocating as she grappled with every worst-case scenario that her astute mind could imagine.

On any other night, she would march into her daughters’ room ready to scold and coerce them back to sleep. But on this night, she didn’t have the heart to do it. By morning, they would all be facing a great change. Cloudy huffed and turned over again onto her side as her stomach churned at the thought.

In the silence, she heard the tell-tale creaking of Igneous Pie’s bed as he arose slowly and carefully. It was apparent that he was trying to minimize the noise of his late-night departure, yet he still took the time to meticulously find his black hat before leaving.

Cloudy readjusted to lay on her back. She listened to his hoofsteps grow fainter as he went downstairs. She propped her head on her pillow and weighed her options. It was against her better judgment to leave her children alone in the house late at night, but she could definitely benefit from a few minutes of fresh air.

Following Igneous’ example, she navigated her way outside vigilantly, only taking a moment to retrieve her glasses. Her muscles flinched as she felt the cool breeze of the summer’s night air.

She immediately spotted her husband when she noticed sparks of light bursting from the huddled mass not far from the house. Igneous didn’t seem too surprised when she placed a hoof on his shoulder and whispered amicably.

“I think it ill-advised to engage in such activities close to the homestead, lest our daughters realize that we art less than perfect.”

The moonlight allowed her to see Igneous’ unconcerned expression as he turned to face her. In his hooves, he held a fire striker, while a full bent tobacco pipe hung loosely in his mouth. He wordlessly rose to his hooves before they relocated further from their home. Igneous sighed as he returned to trying to light his pipe.

“They art of the age to know the truth, Cloudy, plenty of folk smoke around town,” he muttered around the pipe.

“Perhaps. However, none of those folk art their parents. I have lectured them on the dangers of this vice for years.”

Igneous dutifully continued his work, creating a clicking sound each time the items in his hooves met.

“One could indulge in worse vices. Gambling, drinking, or…” The ghost of a smile tugged at the corners of Igneous' muzzle, “maternal hypocrisy.”

Cloudy scoffed and rolled her eyes. “It is a nasty habit. Enough dust enters our lungs during our work, why invite more in? They do not have any troubles to cope with; they should never even consider starting. ‘Tis equally as dangerous as gambling, drinking, or being smart with thy wife.”

The fruitless clacking of the twisted steel on flint continued until Igneous gave up with a grunt, he offered the tools to Cloudy.

“Care to give it a try, Cloudy?”

Cloudy accepted them gingerly, giving them a quick study to ensure nothing was defective. She gave the flint a few strikes, feeling the heated sparks tickle at her hooves. She opted to change the angle and speed while gesturing for Igneous to come closer.

“I will not deny that there is merit in indulging in vices here and there, even if it offers a momentary reprieve from the burdens of this life.”

Igneous hummed in agreement, shifting his head closer to Cloudy as he cupped the pipe with his hoof to usher a few stray sparks in.

“Hold it steady,” he instructed. “I will pull the flame in.”

Smoke filled the air as Igneous puffed steadily, then used a small stone to tamp the tobacco down. Cloudy watched patiently as her husband meticulously prepped the pipe, before silently offering it to her. As soon as she could feel the hot smoke tickling her nostrils, she heard the somber sound of Igneous’ voice.

“Their sister is leaving,” he stated listlessly. Cloudy looked at him curiously, prompting him to continue his thought. “Thou said they had no troubles to cope with, but they do. Pinkamena is leaving, and I do not know how they…how we will function without her.”

All the warmth provided by the pipe seemed to seep away as the weight of reality came crashing down once again. Cloudy shivered and studied the constellations above. Smoke escaped her mouth as she considered his words carefully. After a moment to collect her thoughts, she finally spoke.

“‘Twas…inevitable. One of them was going to leave one day.”

Cloudy already knew what Igneous wanted to say. He tended to raise the same concerns every time they shared this conversation. She passed him the pipe and adjusted her glasses, not waiting for him to reply.

“It is in her best interest to leave this place. As a youth, ‘tis easier to readjust and assimilate,” she insisted, as she always did.

“I…I do fear that there is still much about this world that eludes her.”

“Of course. I am fully grown and there art still aspects of this world that elude me. As parents, we have taught her all we can,” Cloudy explained, trying to keep her tone sympathetic yet definitive.

An exchange of looks between the two revealed a rare breach in their usual stoicism, as they both tried to find comfort in Cloudy’s words. Igneous was the first to look away, gazing at the starry sky. He used one hoof to scratch his sideburns and the other to pass the pipe back to Cloudy.

“I understand… but our teaching could never prepare her for the real world. She hath lived among Plain Ponies her entire life. She only knows our ways and customs. The ponies beyond our land, the Equish, art completely different. They may see her naivety and take advantage of her.”

“Without a doubt, our daughter will struggle. Her innocence, though endearing, may lead to harsh life lessons. But, I assure thee our differences art surface level at best. She hath encountered no less ill behavior here among the Plain than she will among the Equish. Ponies art ponies no matter where they live or what they proclaim to believe in.”

Cloudy’s expression hardened as she stared at her husband, her brows furrowed, and her gaze remained unwavering despite the smoke that burned them.

“Thou art certain our daughter is prepared?” he asked sincerely.

“Aye, as I have insisted many times,” Cloudy confirmed with a puff of smoke.

Igneous’ eyebrows rose as he held his hoof for the pipe. “Does that explain thy recent compulsion to pray for half an hour every night?”

Cloudy huffed as she handed the pipe back to her husband. “Dear Igneous, I hope thee do not intend to imply something unsavory of my character. Is praying not what we Plain folk art called to do? Pray unto Providence for the sake of ourselves and our family. Is praying not what we have done for generations?”

“Aye… but it is not what Cloudy hath done for the few decades that I have known her,” Igneous answered with a smirk.

Cloudy scowled at him, but he kept a faint grin on his face. Many years of marriage taught Cloudy that Igneous only ever broke face at the most annoying times possible. If it were any other pony, she might have taken greater offense. But Igneous wasn’t any other pony, and he knew it.

She sighed. “Rest well knowing that Pinkamena will not go far. I have ensured that she will travel with a small caravan North to Ponyville first.”

Igneous gave her a skeptical look. “Thou believe she will stay there?”

“I know my child and all of her quirks. Pinkamena hath a proclivity for…tangentially following the rules, but she will find her way."

“And what of grander locations?” he asked.

“Our daughter is naive; she hath no reference for the grandness of Equestria. She will be satisfied upon arrival. Ponyville might as well be Manehattan or even Canterlot when compared to Rockville. The instructions art simple, meaning there is little room for error,” Cloudy explained, rolling her hoof for emphasis.

Igneous nodded his head solemnly before passing the pipe to his wife. He let the smoke rise into the atmosphere. “Understood, Pinkamena will learn and grow once she leaves. I have faith that she will find her way, ‘tis comforting to hear that thee feel the same, Cloudy…Cloudy?”

Igneous looked to his wife for confirmation, only to find her staring blankly into the distance. The occasional twitch of her eye was the only movement that she made. She wasn't even breathing, allowing the pipe to hang loosely in her jaw as the smoke filled the air. Her unblinking eyes glistened with years' worth of toil and hardship.

Igneous wrapped his hooves around her shoulders and gave her a firm shake, watching as the pipe bobbed out of her mouth and landed clumsily in her hooves. She broke her typical stoicism as she coughed and sputtered; Igneous gently removed the pipe from her hooves as she strained to catch her breath.

She held a hoof to her chest and spoke breathlessly, “Apologies, dear. Might thee repeat thy previous statement?”

Igneous gaped for a second but opted to follow Cloudy’s lead and ignored her peculiar behavior.

He spoke again with more intensity, “I said that I have faith that Pinkamena will find her way. She does seem excited, and thy confidence in her capability provides great comfort to me. Thou art the most competent mare I have ever met; I trust thy judgment.”

Cloudy nodded her head slowly, humbly taking in her husband’s kind words. “I do value thy trust Igneous. Thou may be uncertain of our daughter’s ability, but I know she is capable because she is equally as comprised of thee as she is of me. We must believe in her…because if we do not, then who will?”

“Aye,” Igneous agreed with a nod.

“Aye,” Cloudy confirmed with her own nod.

“She will be fine.”

“Of course.”

“...”

“...”

“The plan is too simple to fail.”

“Exactly, she will arrive in Ponyville safe and sound.”

“Certainly.”

“...Perhaps…we could pray to Providence one more time.”

“It… would not hurt to do so.”