The Crescent Pact

by Chromentazol

Bonus Chapter 1 - The Voice

Author's Note:

In this extra, Aphelion has a moment to reflect on himself.

This is something a bit more experimental I wanted to try. This chapter is an extra, and you're safe to skip it. Continuity-wise, it takes place between chapter 5 and chapter 6.

Everywhere around Aphelion, there was only darkness. As the unicorn fell into a dreamless sleep, he was able to feel himself stop existing for a moment, his mind slowly becoming one with the void around him. He felt neither warm or cold, neither happy nor sad. There was just a great emptiness comforting Aphelion as he drifted into the realm of his subconscious. For how long had he been there? Hours, days, weeks? He was unable to tell, nor did he want to know. And yet, something was pushing him away from the sweet embrace of the void surrounding him. Aphelion tried to ignore this force, his body shifting on its own, but it was in vain. A voice pierced the darkness, echoing through the emptiness. It was his own voice.

"Wow... You've really screwed that one up, didn't you?" it said to him, growling as it copied his voice.

"I don't care. I don't want to speak. I don't want to think. I just want to..." Aphelion answered, his eyes still closed. It felt as if he was talking to himself. Or rather, to another part of himself.

"You want to do what? Sleep? Run away from the consequences?" the voice barked, mocking him.

"And what if I want to, huh? In this place, I am feeling good."

"That's a lie, and you know it. You don't feel good, but you don't want to feel worse."

"Isn't that what everypony wants? To not feel worse than they feel?"

"And yet, you're still trying to wake up. You're not even aware of that, are you?"

Aphelion took a moment before answering. "...Why would I do that to myself?"

The voice shifted its tone, going from mocking to pitying Aphelion. "Because you still hope. Because you want to live. But you're afraid of what will come."

"I really screwed everything up, didn't I?" his question was rhetorical. "I am going to disappoint my father even more, as well as Lord Comet. I'll probably be jailed for breaking in the castle. I'm losing my faith in those who raised me. And I was betrayed by those I thought would become my friends."

The voice didn't answer, leaving Aphelion to simmer with his thoughts. It knew what the young unicorn needed. Finally, after what felt like a silent eternity, Aphelion spoke again. "...Why do I feel happy despite screwing up?"

"You're happy because you screwed up. When was the last time you allowed yourself to fail?"

"I... I don't understand."

"I think you do understand, subconsciously. Think about it. When was the last time you failed at a task?"

Another long, drawn-out silence. "I don't remember."

"Exactly. Day in and day out, you refuse to act if there's any risk of failure. Every single one of the missions you've been given before yesterday were tasks you could only succeed at. Using machines built by other ponies, testing spells created by other unicorns, spying on a princess for no other reason because your leaders wanted a passive eye on her. You were not allowed to do anything, and so, you weren't allowed to fail. But now, you actually did something on your own volition. You could have gone back home and said you couldn't retrieve the package. Since that was beyond your control, you wouldn't have failed this task. But by going off script, you gave yourself the ability to fail. And you took it, and now you're happy."

"But why?"

The voice's tone shifts once again, this time becoming angry. "Because you were free for one, beautiful afternoon, you moron! Now that you've tasted this forbidden fruit, you won't be able to resist its temptation in the future. Deep down, you know it. It scares you, but it makes you hopeful. It makes you want to live. It makes you want to wake. Up. Tell me why you want to do these things."

"Because I'm free. Because I can finally be my own pony. I don't have to be a tool for others to use anymore."

"Now you get it", it answered. It softened as it spoke.

Slowly, far above Aphelion, a light pierced through the darkness, illuminating the void in a warm yellow glow. As it pushed the darkness away, Aphelion could feel an increasing pressure in his head. Pain. "I'm waking up," he said calmly.

"You are indeed."

"Will I remember this conversation?"

"You never do."

"Will I see you again?"

"Every night."

"Who are you?"

"I am whoever you need me to be. Some nights, I am a mere fantasy. Some others, I am a guiding voice. During the day, I am your instincts. Your empathy. Your self-confidence."

"So, you're my subconscious, basically."

"That's one way to put it."

Aphelion chuckled. "Am I crazy? Why is my mind talking to me as if it were a different pony?"

"You're not. Everypony has something like me in their head. They just have different ways to connect with themselves."

"I'm still taking this as me being crazy."

"So be it. Good luck, Aphelion."

The pain in Aphelion's head became too much to ignore. He suddenly jolted awake.