The Usual Suspects

by Visharo

Suspect 002

"Stating for the record, Suspect 002 is a skinny malnourished cyan pegasus stallion. Eyes have been replaced with purple augments, records say it enhances eyesight and has thermal sights. Wings and barrel are intact, no markings nor augments. Mane and tail are a light purple, looks natural. Cutie mark looks to be a red equine eye with a target in the iris. The only other thing if interest is the scar above the right eye. Bringing him in."

*door opens*

"Ugh, what's this Greaser want. What do you want, Greaser, I've got biz to attend to."

*door closes*

"Take a seat and please refrain from using Greaser, or is 'refrain' too big a word for you?"

"Watch it, Greaser, this is a free city, I can do whatever I want! So I think I'll stand, thank you very much."

"Very well. If you could state your name for the record."

"What if I don't wanna? You can't force me, Greaser."

"I could ask the unicorns outside to zap you. Would that make you talk? Or perhaps, should I ask for your augments to be deactivated?"

"Alright, alright, Greaser. I'll talk. My name?"

"If you please."

"Sky High."

"What were you doing on April 20th? Don't worry, everything you say is confidential and nothing will allow me to arrest you, unless you are the one who robbed the Manesco Bank."

"Parley, eh? I can work with that. So, this whole thing is because somepony finally robbed the Manesco Bank?"

*raspy laughter*

"Yes, Mister High. What did you do on April 20th?"

"Hehe, I do like it when Greasers like you call me that. April 20th? Why I was chilling with my homies down in the Crackshed, getting up to no good, like you do. I believe it was a dig from Jaunt, collect the Bush at Highport and then deliver to Skiv, why, it was so easy, there was no chance we could fuck it up! Then everything went tits up."

"What do you mean?"

"Right before we had everything, the Spats, the Putes, and the crew, this big ol' fucker just ruined everything! Literally jumped onto our whole operation, killed at least seven of us before I got bailed. Now, Jaunt don't like an unfinished job, but they has nothing on me, so I'm safe like a bird. That want you wanted, Greaser?"

"Almost, when was this?"

"Dunno, around ten-ish in the morning? Can I go?"

"You can go when i say you can go. What did the 'big ol' fucker' look like? Can you describe him?"

"Sheesh, Greaser, you folks mighty helpless if yous askin' me what he looks like."

"Sounds like yous getting comfortable, we don't want that. Remember, I've got unicorns on stand by. Now, describe him."

"Alriiight, hold your Dregs! Now, I couldn't see what he looked like cuz I was checkin' if the Putes were workin' good. Can't have 'em break down in the middle, now can we? But what I did see, made my augments boil, lemme tell ya. That brute looked like he was fully tin, ya know? Completely augmented, not a trace of fur anywhere. Anyhoos, he was a pegasus and had eyes like a predator, he definitely was a he, no doubt about it. Right, so after he dropped in, his legs popped open and out came cylinders. That's when I left, I knew deep in my bones, they was Sparklers and Sparklers they were. Am I done here, Greaser?"

"Did anything else happen that day, after the attack?"

"Nope, hid in my bunker, there ain't no way I was getting out after what I saw. Greaser, I told you everything now, can I go!?"

"Yes, yes."

"Good. See ya never, Greaser."

*rapid hoofsteps*

*door opens*

*door closes*