Punkbabii!

by HelloPussy

Anymore!

She’s on her knees with her hands grasp tightly together. I see she’s bowing, I hear her whispering, and though she has her back to me I know her eyes are shut. There’s this statue in front of her. It’s Mother Marey cradling a foal, and I’m just staring at her dead stone eyes, and I’m just wondering how her robes don’t get all dirty from muddy hooves. The foal is pure as a lamb, clean with an obsidian coat almost as dark as Ms. Luna. There’s a celestial halo around the statue's head. The stained glass windows have the sun and moon, two horned mares around it. They practically glow.

Maybe I’m licking the blood from my nose wound. Maybe I’m just folding my arms and huffing, and wondering why I’m here and not with the school nurse. Maybe I’m hoping she’d get off her knees and stop chanting so she’d pay some attention to me. They aren’t real anyway, the statues. I don’t want a lecture on God or anything, I just kinda want her to acknowledge me.

I wait for Mother Celestia to finish her prayer.

It’s a minute later. I found a spot in the back of the pews. There’s a Prench textbook in one of the little shelves. I pick it up and flip through the pages to give myself something to do. There’s doodles of the Power Ponies—or I assume they are Power Ponies. The art is shit—next to a worksheet. Whoever Time Turner is, he's pretty good at this whole school thing. I know I wouldn’t get anything more than 60% on a test, let alone a perfect score.

There’s suddenly a white handkerchief in front of my nose. It spooks me enough to get me to jump. “I didn’t intend to startle you.” I look up to see the kind eyes of Mother Celestia. She dabs at my cut, and I sorta let her. “You know, you accomplish more with words than fists.” She has a crucifix over her long dress. I watched it dangle from her neck as she cleans the blood from my face.

“Maybe.” I would tell her I didn’t start that fight, but that would throw Applejack under the bus, and I could never do that. I should’ve watched my mouth anyway.

We sit there in silence for a moment as she finishes up. I oddly feel very calm, like the sort of tingling feeling you get when someone gently runs their fingers through your hair. “What’s on your mind?” She asks, and I realize I have my eyes shut.

Now I’m pulling away like she’s Windy, and I already told that woman that I didn’t want to talk about it. I’ll tell her too if I have to. I don’t care if she’s a fucking nun.

“Nothings ever on my mind.” I have my arms folded. “Why else am I pregnant at 15.” I know how people view me, and yeah maybe not every stranger knows I’m pregnant yet, but most of the school does just because of the special class. A couple of weeks ago people were all over Rarity’s Ponygram calling her a slut, a single mother, washed up before she even got started, and I mean, if Bow didn’t delete my social media I imagine I’d receive the same sort of shit. That stuff hurts, it hurts a lot.

“You’re a child,” Mother Celestia is sitting next to me now. “You’re expected to make mistakes. There is no shame in your situation.” Her voice is so soothing. I don’t know if she’s doing it on purpose or not. “Especially if it was not your fault.”

My heart drops. I already know Ms. Luna snitched to my parents about yesterday, but would she really go ratting to her sister!? And would she even know about Mac? And Mac is so not responsible for this, like, at all. I told Windy this already!

“My BD goes to a public school in Cloudsdale, and he’s, like, also 15.” I lie.

She raises a brow. “BD?”

“Baby daddy.” I sound just like Rarity. “So don’t you worry about it. I know I’m 100% at fault.” Now I’m sitting up straight. “We didn’t practice safe sex,” she still has her brows raised. I remember what they taught in Sex Ed. I know the right thing to say to make an adult give a sigh of relief. “Or abstinence. Anyway, just suspend me already.” Or expel me. I already have a feeling she doesn’t like me much with all the rules she forces me to follow and not anyone else. “I know it’s coming.”

“Luna used to be a troubled girl, and I used to claim to never know until it was too late.” Mother Celestia moves the only hair I have left out of my face. “All the signs were there, her behavior was screaming for help, and yet I ignored it for my own political career.” She’s looking at the statue again. I look at it too. The sun's still shining through the windows. “I was so swamped with work that when she called me the night before her…” She stops herself. I want her to tell me more, but I don’t say anything, and she keeps going anyway. “Before I knew it, I’m sending my own sister to jail and wondering how such a sweet, lovable girl could commit such a crime, but I knew, Rainbow Dash. I knew she was suffering by the look in her eyes.” She’s staring at me now, and I’m staring back at her. “You share that look.”

I don’t like the way she’s seeing through me, reading my thoughts, reaching my soul. I clear my throat then try to think of something to get out of the impending conversation. “I didn’t know the rumors were true. I never took Ms. Luna as a jailbird.”

She doesn’t acknowledge my comment. Instead she rests a comforting hand on my back. “Are you ready to start your journey towards healing?”

No. No, because I don’t need healing. I’m okay. I’m fine, and neither her, nor Windy, nor Bow know a thing about what I’m going through.

“I don’t need your help.” I growl like I’m some rabid dog. She still has this gentle demeanor. She’s still not yelling at me when she should be. “There’s nothing wrong with me! I did it to myself!” I’m screaming through gritted teeth. I’m barking, frothing at the mouth. I’m just waiting for her to kick me out of school like she wants to, and I’m waiting for my parents to come get me with that same disappointed look on their face, and I’m waiting to bark at them too, and they bark at me like a couple of wild animals.

She doesn’t do any of that. She rubs my back now, and I don’t mind it despite being so angry. I’m just so angry, I’m just so tired, and frustrated, and mad. And I think I’m also afraid, but I don’t want to be, and I don’t want to show it.

“I spoke to your parents last night, Rainbow Dash.” I’m not surprised. I knew they were saying something to someone I just wasn’t sure if it was the cops or not. “They want to help you, and so do I.” I’m about to repeat myself, when she cuts me off before I can. “Whether you want it or not. I’d rather you not fall prey to the same destruction that consumed my Luna.”

She has a Bible in her hands. She opens it to pull a photo out and hand it to me. There’s a large cozy cottage behind Ms. Luna and a group of smiling girls gathered around her. “This is what she’s been up to since her freedom. Your parents and I agreed that you should stay for a while to learn how to raise your unborn child, and maybe receive proper guidance back towards the light.” I’m staring at the picture like it just flashed me the bird. “And maybe you’ll begin to be honest with yourself too.”

“This is a group home?” I ask and I can see that some of the girls have bellies. So now it’s just not the special class, but a whole house full of dumb stupid pregnant idiots? “My parents are throwing me away!?”

“Of course not…“ she tells me but I’m not listening anymore. No, I’m screaming now. I’m screaming into my palms like an absolute maniac straight out of the looney bin, and I don’t care how crazy I look. I’m screaming at the top of my lungs. I’m screaming until my throat burns and my jaw along with it, and even when it burns, even despite that, I keep screaming. I swear I’ll shatter the glass, I swear I’ll break it along with everything in this room. I swear I won’t ever stop screaming.

But Mother Celestia only sits there and continues to rub my back.