• Published 28th Jun 2021
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The Impact of Humans on Ponies - the koopanater



When a teenager wakes up in Equestria, he will learn how to live life with a problem every week

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Baby Cakes

True to Alex's word, he was tolerating Rarity. He still seems grumpy when he was in the same room as Rarity, but it doesn't ted to overwrite his jolliness, at most he just gives a glance at Rarity. Though, he would still tend to give her the cold shoulder, as he wouldn't answer her her most of the time. Still, progress was being made between the two. As of right now though, something important was happening at the hospital, and fortunately it was actually happy there. This is because Pinkie recently ran around town to her friends and told them that her employers Mr. and Mrs. Cake were going to have their baby soon. Many of the group were told of the news prior as they were told back when they were expecting, though the two most recent members were surprised at the revelation. Right now though, they were all looking into a room full of newborns, trying to guess which one was the Cake's.

"Can you believe the new baby is finally here?" Applejack asked, still amazed at the prospect.

"Cup Cake and Carrot Cake must be so proud!" Twilight smiled with glee.

"I wonder if it's a filly or a colt?" Rarity thought aloud.

"Ooh, I hope it's a girl." Jasmine cooed.

"Either way, it's great to hear that everything went well." Cali said with confidence.

"Though, ye have ta admit, it's weird that this news has evaded me an' Huston fer so long." Alex admitted, looking inside with less curiosity, but still interested.

"I'll have to agree with Alex. How did we miss this?"

"Probably because the author either didn't know how to implement it like the slumber party or just straight up forgot." Pinkie answered, getting confused and concerned looks from her friends (and me. Pinkie, what the actual he-) "But forget that! I wanna see the new baby pony! I wanna see!" She immediately rubbed her face on the glass window while saying "Which one is it?" While everyone was looking into the glass, they saw Mr. Cake walk in and stand next to a crib he looked up to look at everyone and smiled.

"Meet our son, Pound Cake." Mr. Cake lowered the blanket, revealing a light brown pegasus colt with a brown mane, sleeping away like nothing was wrong in the world. Upon seeing him, everyone cooed at him with affection, even Alex and Huston. That's when Mr. Cake smirked in happy pride. "...And our daughter, Pumpkin Cake." He then turned to the other crib nest to him and lowered it's blanket, revealing a filly with the same coat as Pound Cake but with an orange mane and was a unicorn. Upon seeing the two, the group looked in with more confusion than happiness. Well, other than Pinkie

"Wait...two new foals for me to play with?" Pinkie wondered aloud before letting out a loud gasp. "That's two, two, two times the fun! This is the greatest day ever!" She then slipped downwards and disappeared. Right before reappearing in the nursery with a party hat on. "We need to celebrate your birthday!" She cried happily. "Cause you are just born today! Woo-hoo!" Before she could use the noisemaker in her mouth however, a nurse cut her off by shushing her.

"The babies are trying to sleep!" the nurse said.

"But I was just-"

"Shh!"

"But-"

"Shh!"

Pinkie had no choice but to remain silent as the nurse took her leave. At least, until she left and she went over to the cribs silently. "Happy happy birthday, to you and you today-" She was cut off again by the nurse, who went and kicked Pinkie out of the room back to her friends. With Pinkie out of the way, everyone was left to question Mr. Cake.

"How in thunderation is one of them twins a Pegasus and the other one a unicorn?" Applejack asked.

"Easy." Mr. Cake began to answer. "My great-great-great-great-grandfather was a unicorn, and Cup Cake's great-aunt's second cousin twice removed was a Pegasus. That makes sense, right?"

"Erm, sorta?" Alex shrugged, along with Jasmine and Cali.

"Ah, yeah! Heh, just you wait! Once little Pound Cake there gets his wings going, he'll be all over the place!" Rainbow exclaimed.

"Talking from experience?" Alex smirked.

"Mm-hmm! You know it!" Rainbow nodded.

"And be careful around Pumpkin Cake." Twilight said.

"Baby unicorns get strange magic surges that come and go." Rarity added.

"Doesn't sound pleasant." Huston commented. He was about to continue, but-

"Quick! Make a wish and blow out your candles!" They all heard Pinkie whisper. Turns out, she managed to get back inside, this time with a cake. "Which is easy, 'cause there are zero candles! You are zero years old, after all!"

"Shh!" The nurse came back in, shushing her again. As everyone was fawning and questioning the newborn twins however, a certain human was in the back of the room, not looking in with as much excitement as everyone else. Oddly, he had a more pained expression, as he had a vision of a similar scene, but with humans instead.


A Month Later

As a month passed, nothing too interesting has happened since the Cake family grew by two. For some odd reason though, Xavier seemed to isolate himself a bit more than usual, which was odd to many. He was still going out and hanging with his friends, it was just strange. Everything changed however when one day, Xavier was home alone working on a new project though a welding mask. As he was working however, he heard a knock at the door, and it sounded quite frantic. Lifting his welding mask off him and hanging it, he answered the door to see the Cakes at the door, alongside their kids and an overly excited Pinkie. When Xavier got a better look at the Cakes however, he noticed how worried they looked.

"Erm, can I help you two?" Xavier asked both politely and confused.

"Xavier!" Mr. Cake said franticly, startling Xavier. "We need a favor!"

"Um, is everything okay?"

"I told you! Pick me!" Pinkie yelled out behind them, giving Xavier a few hints.

"Erm, do you want me to take care of Pinkie?"

"No. Listen, we have to deliver this enormously big catering order out of town! But we completely forgot about it and we don't have a foalsitter to babysit Pound and Pumpkin Cake!" Xavier looked at the two foals who were simply babbling. "So we came here to ask if you or one of the other humans could foalsit for us!"

"Erm, well there's a problem. Everyone here is busy." Xavier shrugged. "Everyone except for Huston is working. I would say look for him, but I don't know where he is and I think he's doing a painting, so I don't think disturbing him would be good. Did you already ask the girls?"

"Yes, and they are all busy." Mrs. Cake sighed.

"Which is why I can do it!" Pinkie offered, Xavier giving an unimpressed look. He then motioned to the two to get closer.

"Let me guess, you're trying to find anyone before you ask Pinkie."

"Well, yes." Mr. Cake admitted. "She's great with the kids, but that's when we're around. We're worried that-"

"She won't be able to handle the needs of a foal. Let alone two." Xavier finished, the Cakes looking away in both guilt and embarrassment. Xavier stood straight and rubbed the back of his head with uncertainty on his face and action. "Grrrmmm. I guess..." He paused for a time that was surprisingly long before finishing. "I can do it for you two. Just this once though." As the Cakes sighed in relief, but Pinkie seemed upset. Xavier noticed and after thinking for a bit, gave another sigh. "On one condition, Pinkie helps." The three looked at him confused. "I can't do this alone, so I'll need Pinkie's help." The parents looked at each other and sighed.

"If she's what you need, then she can help." Pinkie then smiled with glee and began to hop around excitedly. As The Cakes looked worried, Xavier's face held an emotionless face, as if he was steeling himself for something.


"Now, Xavier, are you sure you really understand the responsibility of watching over two babies?"

After hiring Xavier and to an extent Pinkie, the family brought them back to the shop to get ready for the delivery. As they were scrambling around, Xavier kept his emotionless face and Pinkie looked happy. Now Mr. Cake was questioning Xavier.

"Don't worry, Mr. and Mrs. Cake, I can take care of this." Xavier said with a calm tone. "I've taken care of my friends well, I can deal with this. Plus, I have Pinkie here as my assistant." Pinkie nodded happily, feeling good about being included.

"Sounds promising, so we'll take it." Mrs. Cake said as she reached for the counter and grabbed a list. She then unraveled it, revealing a list that was at least a few yards in length. "Here you are, dearie. All your responsibilities are on this list." When the two looked at it, they both had different reactions. As Xavier reached down to look at the list, Pinkie was shocked at the length.

"Whoa! That's a long list!" Pinkie exclaimed. "And this is for-"

"Your kids are well behaved for their age." She was cut off by Xavier, who was smiling softly as he read the list. "I was expecting this list to be three times the length."

"Wait, you were!?" Pinkie and the Cakes asked surprised, both from Xavier's statement and his relative calmness to the list.

"Well, I just assumed since you had twins, so... I kinda just did some math." Xavier shrugged. "In any case, don't worry about a thing you two. We've got this covered." Xavier's calm smile was enough to get through to the two as they relaxed, at least until they realized the situation again.

"Gah, no time! We'll frost it when we get there! C'mon, sugarplum, tick-tock!" Mr. Cake exclaimed, pushing a wrapped up cake through the door.

"Oh right! Take good care of our two precious little ginger snaps!" Mrs. Cake said. Xavier nodded in understanding as Pinkie walked them out.

"No problemo, Mr. and Mrs. Cake. Everything is under control." She said as she closed the door after the couple gave one last wave before leaving. When she did, she looked directly at the twins smiling. Unfortunately (or predictably for that matter) the two began to cry loudly, startling Pinkie.

"Gah, author! Why must you plague my life with incidental quotes?!" (Consider it revenge for calling me out. Now then...) As Pinkie looked at the two in fear, she began to stammer out pleas.

"Oh, don't cry, little friends! Look, look!" She then dashed over to the kitchen. Whin in, she took the doors and began to open and close them. "Where's Pinkie Pie...? Where's Pinkie Pie?" The babies weren't impressed or entertained however and continued to cry. "Oh no... I'm right here, see?" She then ran up to the foals and began making funny faces at them to try and make them laugh. It didn't work. Pinkie began to panic and began to think. "Oh, think think think... Aha!" She then ran upstairs to find something in the twin's room. As she was searching however, something stopped her. And that was the sudden quiet and lack of crying. Confused and concerned, she began to go back downstairs. As she was, she was confused to hear the tune of a music box. When she made it downstairs, she saw Xavier holding and winding a music box with the twins watching and listening in fascination. Once the tune ended, Pinkie approached. "Hey, what did you do?"

"All kids have something in common." Xavier began to explain calmly with a small, warm smile. "They always react to many situations similarly to one another. A hectic, loud environment or being away from their parents can cause them to cry since they have no other way of communicating. Meanwhile, a calmer environment or sound can help soothe them." Xavier put the music box down nest to the foals, the two looking at it curiously. "I knew they would end up crying sooner or later, so I packed that with me so I could calm them down." As Xavier watched the two foals observe the box, Pinkie looked at him with mixed emotions. She was in awe at how calm he was, but also jealous and a bit angry at how well he handled it. It was no matter to her however, as she would prove to everyone that she could be a good foalsitter.


After Xavier calmed the foals down, he decided to let Pinkie watch them for a while while he looked over both the kitchen and the kids' room. As he was checking the kids' room, Pinkie decided to look over the list for the next thing to do with the kids.

"Meal time. That's easy enough." She took the two kids into the kitchen and sat them into two kiddie seats before heating up some bowls of baby food. Once they were done, she placed the bowls onto the seats for the two. The two simply looked at the food in confusion, leaving Pinkie a bit conflicted. At least until she picked up a bowl for herself. "Eat up! Like this! Num-num-num, num-num-num-num! Ahh!" She then pretended to eat from the bowl messily, but before she could put the bowl down-

"No, not like that." She heard Xavier say behind her. Looking over at him, he came over and took both bowls from her and the seats.

"Hey! Why not?"

"One, you're demonstration would make a huge mess. Two, they can't understand you. And three, they can't eat this in the first place." Xavier explained as he put the bowls down. The last point confused Pinkie.

"Huh? Why can't they?"

"Because baby food is for when they are a bit older than a few weeks old." Xavier continued as he looked around the cabinets before he found some baby formula. "At their age, they can't digest solids yet, so they can only drink baby formula now." As he was prepping the formula, he turned to Pinkie. "Even if they could eat baby food, they can't eat it by themselves. They need someone to feed them since they can't exactly handle eating in the same way." Pinkie was getting a bit annoyed at how Xavier was showing her up, but before she could get too angry, he asked Pinkie something. "I have feeding them handled. If you could start a warm bath, that would be great. Not too hot though, we don't want to burn them." Pinkie bounced up happily.

"I sure can." She then hopped out of the kitchen, leaving Xavier to feed the twins. When she did, Xavier sighed.

"She's got the spirit, but she lacks the understanding." He commented to no one as he fed the foals their meals. After he finished feeding them (and burping them), Pinkie returned to the kitchen.

"Bath's ready!" Pinkie called excitedly, earning a nod from Xavier.

"Thank you Pinkie." He followed Pinkie up to the bathroom carrying the twins. When they got there he gave the two to Pinkie to hold before walking over and dipping his hand into the tub full of water and bubbles. "Hmm, yep. This is perfect." He then motioned to Pinkie to bring the twins over to the tub, to which she complied. When she was walking over however, the twins managed to squirm their way out of her grip and began to run around the bathroom happily. Even though Xavier didn't look too phased at their antics, Pinkie started chasing them around the bathroom irritated. Xavier simply watched as Pinkie played a strange game of hide and seek before she managed to grab them. When she did and tossed them into the tub, the two began to cry again. Even though Pinkie was panicking, Xavier was calm.

"Hey now, don't cry." He said with a calm smile. "Look here, bubbles." He then lightly splashed some foamy bubbles towards them, sending many into the air where they floated like stars. The babies were quickly taken over by the pretty and sparkly bubbles in the air and stopped crying. Pinkie sighed in relief as they looked, but one floated a bit too close to Pumpkin Cake and landed onto her horn, popping. This popped bubble upset them, causing them to cry. Like always, Pinkie was panicking, but Xavier simply looked a bit confused. "Huh, normally that's enough..." He whispered, but Pinkie didn't here as she dashed off somewhere. When she returned, she was holding a rubber duck.

"Look, look, uh, floating thing!" She said as she showed the duck. She then put the duck into the water, the kids stopped crying and smiled.

"Ooh, nice call Pinkie." Xavier approved. Pinkie, taking the appreciation as encouragement, dashed off again. When she returned, she was carrying a large amount of toys and was aiming to dump them into the tub. At least, until Xavier stopped her. "Woah woah woah! What are you doing?"

"You said that toys were a good call."

"Well yes, but only two or three are needed." Xavier explained, taking two toys from her arms. "If you put all of those into the tub you'll overwhelm them. Best keep the number low." Taking the toys he took from Pinkie, he placed them into the bathtub, letting the two foals play for a while before starting to bathe them. As he was watching over the two, Pinkie looked at them in jealousy and annoyance, all over how Xavier was doing a better job than she was.


After Xavier gave the twins their baths, he decided to let them simply play in their room for a while while he and Pinkie watched. After a while of Xavier looking over a project he brought over and Pinkie was looking over the list to see if there was anything she could do, something happened that most would dread. A scent lingered over towards them, and it was not pleasant. The two looked over with covered noses at the twins, fearing the worst.

"Smells like somepony needs me to changy-wangy their diaper-wiper right now-a-wow!" Pinkie spoke, half to let Xavier know (like he didn't smell it) and half to try and distract herself from the scent. As she was reaching for the diapers though, Xavier stopped her.

"Pinkie, let me." He said as he took the diapers. Before Pinkie could retaliate though, there was a knock at the store's entrance. "Pinkie, could you take care of that while I change the twins? Thanks." Pinkie wasn't even given the option to opt out before Xavier walked over to the twins, her growling in response as she walked down to see who was at the door. When she opened it, she saw that it was Twilight and Huston.

"Hi! We finished up the work I had to do, so we thought we'd stop by and see if you needed any help." Twilight greeted and explained, Huston giving a wave.

"Um, well..." Pinkie stammered.

"Yes, we know that both you and Xavier are here, but we still wanted to lend a hand. Or hoof in Twilight's case." Huston explained as he and Twilight entered the bakery.

"Mmhmm. We thought you two might need some help." Twilight continued. This however irritated Pinkie.

"Ex-cuse me?!"

"Babies take a lot of work, and some ponies are just not cut out to handle the responsibility." Twilight said as she used her magic to organize some toys that were scattered about. As she was however, Pinkie got into her's and Huston's faces.

"Is that so?" She said irritated before she began to push the two out. "Well, thanks for stopping by, Twilight. Sorry, I don't have time to visit. I'm very very busy with my responsibilities here."

"We're happy to help!" Twilight assured. "It's no trouble-" She didn't finish her sentence however as the door closed on her.

"Wait, I also came to tell Xavier that there's a situation at the spa." Huston called out, hoping that Pinkie heard. "They need some emergency maintenance and need his help soon." Pinkie did hear that, and after thinking about it for a second, her eyes sparkled.

"Oh, I'll tell him. Thank you." Pinkie said as she smiled.

"Tell who what?" Pinkie looked over to the stairs to see Xavier walking down them. "I just changed their diapers, what's up?" As he went over to the the sink to wash up, Pinkie began to speak again.

"Well, it was Huston. He came over to tell you that the spa needs some maintenance soon. He also said it was urgent." Pinkie explained, leaving out Twilight and their offer to help. Upon hearing about the news, Xavier looked up in a bit of worry.

"Now? Ah, what am I going to do..."

"You should go! I can take care of things here.' Pinkie said confidently. Pinkie's suggestion made Xavier a bit nervous.

"Erm... I'm not sure you should be left with them..." He said as he rubbed the back of his head. When he saw Pinkie's face and how she looked offended, he waved his hands in front of him in defense. "I didn't mean you would cause problems! I-I just mean that I feel more comfortable knowing there were multiple people watching the kids. If I left, it would mean that there would be no way for you to get any help and-"

"Don't worry about it." Pinkie said as she put her hoof around Xavier's shoulder. "I've got this in the bag. I've been watching you all day, I can do this." Despite Pinkie's confidence, Xavier still looked a bit worried.

"Are you sure you do? It's still a big responsibility."

"I do." Xavier looked at her for a good minute, struggling to decide. After an unbearable minute, he sighed.

"Alright, I guess I can trust you." Pinkie smiled internally. "But I am going to try and finish this job quickly so I can get back soon. Also, if anything happens, promise me that you'll go to someone and get help?"

"I promise!" Pinkie saluted. Xavier nodded and began to rush to the door.

"I'm trusting you Pinkie." As he exited the bakery, Pinkie smiled confidently and determined, as she was going to prove that she-


Wasn't good at foalsitting

Two hours after Xavier left for the spa, he returned to the bakery with haste (Well, he did hurry, but he was more like power walking) When he opened the door however, he became worried as he heard quite the commotion from upstairs. He hurried upstairs, and when he got up there he saw something that he didn't expect, even though Pinkie was involved. For one, there was a foal flying about, as Pound Cake was actually flying around giggling. Pumpkin Cake was also doing something unexpected, as there were toys floating around her via magic, one of which was in her mouth as she teethed on it. And in the middle of the room was Pinkie overwhelmed by the two before she took notice of Xavier standing in the doorway. When she saw him, she broke down and suddenly she was the one crying. Hearing her, even the two foals stopped what they were doing and watched as Xavier walked over to her. When he reached her, he simply kneeled down and gave her a hug, waiting for her to calm down.

"Everypony was right! I am a terrible foalsitter! I'm not responsible!" Pinkie cried. All Xavier did was hug her as she cried. It took a bit, but she did start to calm down. As she was, Xavier spoke.

"I'm sorry Pinkie." He apologized. Pinkie looked at him teary-eyed and confused, not understanding. "I'm sorry that I placed the burden onto you. I know you just wanted to prove you could be a good foalsitter." Xavier then stood up with a sigh as he looked off into space. "I was once a babysitter back where I came from..." He said, surprising Pinkie. "When I started, I had had someone teach me what to do as well." Xavier put his hands into his hoodie's pocket, feeling the picture that he had and closed his eyes. "Those memories made it hard to accept this, and I doubt that I can do this again. So I wanted to show you what to do." Xavier then turned back to her and put his hand onto her shoulder. "Being someone responsible for another means that you can't be playing all the time. There comes a time where you have to get your act together and fly straight for once in your life." Xavier's look of serious was enough to make Pinkie recognize what he was doing, and she began to stand up. As she was, Xavier smiled softly. "Besides, if you cry then the kids will be sad as well." Him and Pinkie then looked over to the twins, who were crawling over to Pinkie with guilty faces and began to nuzzle up to her. "They seem to trust you more, so you can take care of them as long as you take responsibility." Pinkie looked between him and the foals, processing all that he said. When she did, she wiped her eyes and looked up to him hopeful. When she did, Xavier smiled, knowing that she managed to learn.


A Few Hours Later

After Pinkie calmed down, the two got to work. They started by putting the two foals to bed, which was easy as they burned all their energy playing before Xavier got back. When they did fall asleep, Xavier helped Pinkie learn and understand the responsibilities about taking care of a foal. He also helped her clean up the mess that the two made during their rampage. By the time they finished and checked up on Pound and Pumpkin Cake again, they heard the front door open alongside voices.

"Pinkie Pie! Xavier! We're back!" Mr. Cake shouted.

"How did everything go?" Mrs. Cake asked before the both of them let out a gasp, seeing how the place was spotless.

"Are we in the right place?" Mr. Cake asked, amazed that the place wasn't destroyed.

"Shh!" The two heard Pinkie shush them, seeing her and Xavier on the stairs, smiling down at them. Pinkie then motioned to follow them, to which the couple complied. When they stopped, they saw that their kids were sleeping away peacefully in their crib. Seeing both their kids asleep and the bakery clean, they were quite impressed.

"P-Pinkie, Xavier. This is just... just..."

"Amazing is what it is." Mr. Cake finished for his wife, turning to the duo. "We had no idea how responsible you really are."

"Ahh, it was nothing." Xavier said with a raised hand. "I was just happy me and Pinkie could help."

"Well you two helped a lot." Mr. and Mrs. Cake then looked at each other and smiled. "Would you be interested in becoming our go-to foalsitter on a permanent basis?" They asked Xavier, to which he simply shook his head.

"I'm sorry, I can't" He responded. "My work as the maintenance crew for the spa makes it difficult for me to fully predict my availability. Heck, something happened partway today, so I had to leave. It was fortunate that Pinkie was here though, she was able to take care of the kids while I was gone. I think she's more fit for the position." At Xavier's suggestion, Pinkie nodded with confidence. The Cakes looked slightly unsure, but seeing as how Xavier was so confident about it, they made up their minds.

"In that case, would you like to be our go-to foalsitter Pinkie?" Mr. Cake asked.

"Yes, I would love to." Pinkie responded calmly. The couple nodded and smiled.

"Well, thank you two again for foalsitting for us." Mrs. Cake said as she reached for her bag, pulling out a small bag. "Please take this as payment." Xavier took the bag to hear some jingling of bits, so he nodded.

"Thank you. I should get going now, so see you later."

"Oh, I'll walk you out!"

"No need Pinkie, I'll be fine. See you Pinkie." He said with a smile. While Mr. and Mrs. Cake smiled back, Pinkie looked concerned. This was because she saw his smile and knew it. It wasn't a happy one, but it was a sad one. Seeing it concerned her, but she had no idea if she should ask, as she believed that it involved Xavier's story of from before. As of right now though, she would simply keep her question silent, after all he did help her out in the end, but maybe in the future she would ask.

Author's Note:

Another short chapter, but don't get used to it.
I'm planning on the next chapter being not only longer, but also as a completely different story, so that might take some time. It also doesn't help that college is chewing away at both free time and my sanity. So I wouldn't expect the next chapter soon. But until then, enjoy your free time, Koops out!