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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I have a few problems with this story so far
1. Tons of grammatical errors, especially in the first half
2. Lots of forced exposition
3. Slow it down a bit, your not in a speed writing competition. Basically, fix your pacing
Other than that, story is pretty good, but I do recommend getting an editor
69th person to like it fu*k yeah![:twilightsheepish:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/twilightsheepish.png)
Why is it so cold. *FNF 'shit no' starts*