Don't Let Go

by cierragp

iv. Carina

In my next life, I wanted a mother who would cherish me, and who I could cherish in return.

"Rainbow Blaze," Carina sobbed. "I shouldn't have done that!"

I was not dead?

"I'm so sorry." She sniffed. "Father can be mean sometimes. He didn't intend to hurt you though."

Through her words, I learned that mother had told her that I had been punished, embellished with details that I laughed at. Carina stared at me strange but she did not question it. Maybe we were all used to it.

She fumbled with the dressing and tape.

The doctor who treated me had been bribed by mother with offers of love and had quickly trapped himself in her web of lies. I asked for Carina to keep it silent.

"I will." She hugged me. "I'm so sorry, Blaze, I never wanted to hurt you. I won't hurt you again, ever."

"It's fine." And I meant it.

It turns out, she put the wrong kind of trust in her brother.

"Rainbow." I had actively avoided him for quite some time, and successfully so, but this was new. Showing up at my residence to find me?

"Yes?"

"Why is it that you are so incredibly busy this summer?"

"Family stuff, my birth, all sorts of things, annoying..." I rattled out an incoherent list. He narrowed his eyes.

"So it would seem. But what takes so much of your time?"

"I already told you."

"You lied. Why did you try to kill yourself?" He asked. "Was it because of father trying to force you to marry Carina?"

"No." And then I took a leap of faith. "Because I liked you." I laugh. "And you're engaged, so I'm not going to be happy, so I decided to kill myself." I couldn't stop laughing.

He stared at me in shock, and without a word, he turned and left.

That summer, he never called me again.