To Earn One's Wings

by HollowPony

Chapter 6: Discord

To Earn One’s Wings

Chapter Six: Discord

When Thunderbolt could see again he rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn’t seeing things. He was sitting on a small island floating in an inky abyss. Around the islands, various other things floated. A purple dolphin doing summersaults, an upside-down merry-go-round and a pink island lazily drifting on its side. As Thunderbolt watched, a purple tentacle wrapped itself around a tiny island covered in daffodils and yanked it into the yawning abyss below.

“Don’t stare too deeply into the abyss, pony,” Discord warned nonchalantly as if he didn’t really care if Thunderbolt stared or not. “It might start staring back,” he said with a shiver.

Thunderbolt spun around. Discord stood behind him. He was opening the door of a surprisingly normal single story house. Sure, its walls were bright purple and clashed with the canary yellow roof and carnivorous plants were planted the flower boxes underneath the windows, but other than that a seemingly normal house. Thunderbolt let loose a bolt of lightning at Discord. The Chaos spirit twisted his body around the bolt and it hit the house’s front door, scorching the wood painted the same yellow colour as the roof.

“Ah, so you can actually use magic,” Discord cackled in delight. He opened the scorched door. With his eagle claw, he beckoned Thunderbolt to follow him into the house. The winged unicorn looked around. An island made out of cotton candy floated down and a fruit bat made of fruit took a bite out of it. Noticing Thunderbolt’s gaze it screeched at him, revealing fangs made of toothpicks. Seeing no other clear option Thunderbolt followed the spirit of chaos into his home.

The inside was more unusual than outside. There he saw stairs leading nowhere. Dust bunnies were hopping under a couch covered in pink and green scales. Paintings without frames and frames without paintings covered the walls. A grey door was bolted onto the ceiling, which was tiled in a red and blue checkerboard while the floor was covered in a fluffy green carpet. Swirling shapes moved on the rug. It felt almost alive under Thunderbolt’s hooves. A ragged hole in the far wall revealed the hall into the rest of the building.

“Make yourself at home,” Discord’s voice rang from further inside the house. He poked his head out of the ragged hole. “Let me take care of those shackles.” He snapped his fingers. A bright light flashed beneath Thunderbolt. He felt the restrictions around his legs disappeared. Thunderbolt rolled the joints in his forelegs.

“What do you want?” Thunderbolt yelled. Discord did not answer. Thunderbolt scanned the room. A painting shifted from a scene in an empty meadow to an exploding volcano. A ripple in the carpet rolled under Thunderbolt’s hooves. He shuddered. He decided, that if Discord wanted him dead, he would have done it by now. He walked to the scaled couch and lowered himself onto it. He jumped back up. He had sat down on a dust bunny. It was squeaking at him in what he assumed to be an indignant manner. It hopped off the couch and, with a last squeak of indignation, it disappeared under the couch.

“What in God’s name…” he muttered. He didn’t try to sit down again. He felt like a bird in the water. Everything about the place screamed that he doesn’t belong here. His existence was too ordered and sensible. He was, for all intents and purposes, a foreigner.

Movement in the hallway through the ragged hole caught Thunderbolt’s eye. Discord emerged from the hole in a frilly pink apron. He was carrying a try with a completely ordinary green teapot on it. Thunderbolt doubted that it would stay ordinary. Next to it was three boxes of different colours. Green, yellow and red. Discord glanced at Thunderbolt as he set the tray on the low white table in front of the couch.

“I believe that I told you to make yourself at home,” Discord admonished in a good-natured tone.

“I’m fine, thanks,” Thunderbolt answered.

Discord raised an eyebrow and snapped his fingers. The couch behind Thunderbolt moved closer to the table, sweeping his feet from under him and placing his tail end onto the seat. It was surprisingly comfortable. Discord started opening the various boxes on the tray. First, the yellow box was opened.

“Would you like some ginseng?” he asked before Thunderbolt could protest about being forced onto the couch and pinned underneath the table. A chorus of voices floated from the box along with their owners, the teabags. They were singing a show tune about a pony who lost his wallet. “Or would you rather have some Rooibos?” Discord opened the red box. Within a bunch of red bushes lay still. He reached for the green box. “Or would you have some green tea?”

“I’m fine, thanks. What do you want?” Discord shrugged, picked up one of the red bushed and threw it into the teapot.

“Did you know that Rooibos is not actually a tea plant? It’s actually a herb.”

“Fascinating. Why am I here?”

Discord poured the tea into a cup and took a sip. “Do you know what happens when a pony goes to the spirit realm?”

“No, it wasn’t a topic that caught my attention.”

Discord raised a hairy eyebrow. “Really?”

“No, but I’ll bite. What happens to them?”

“They become delicious.”

“What?” Thunderbolt’s eyes started darting around for an exit.

“Oh, just something I heard. Apparently, it spices up the taste. Like adding salt to a broth.”

“Interesting. Why are you telling me this? If you’re going to eat me just do it.”

Discord laughed. A mad, cackling laughter that sent the chimeric creature rolling around on his floor. Seeing an opportunity to escape, Thunderbolt squirmed from his seat and bolted for the door. He threw out his magic and yanked the door open. Freedom was just a few meters away. Freedom on a tiny island floating in an endless abyss with a near-omnipotent mishmash of animals looking for him, but it was freedom nonetheless. A loud snap reached his ears. A bright light filled his vision. Thunderbolt felt the comfortable texture of the couch on his hindquarters. When his vision cleared Thunderbolt saw Discord wiping tears from his eyes. From the corner of his eye, he saw a tiny version of Discord clad in a hard hat and construction vest boarding up the door.

“It’s rude to run out on a host like that,” Discord complained with mock indignation.

“Fuck you, Discord. What do you want?”

Discord laughed again. “This is why I prefer you ponies alive rather than dead. You’re so much more entertaining.”

“So I’m the evening’s entertainment rather than the main course?”

“I’ll have to thank Celestia for asking me to do this favour. I never imagined that it would be this entertaining.”

“Celestia asked you for a favour? And I’m involved somehow?”

“Yes, something about the fate of Equestria hanging in the balance and wanting ponies who could sort it out; I wasn’t really listening.”

‘What the hell does Celestia want with me?’ Thunderbolt thought. “I assume that she didn’t ask you to keep me locked up in your home?”

“Oh no.” Discord snapped his fingers and appeared inside his cup, a towel turban on his head. “She wanted you transported somewhere or another, but I wanted my own curiosity sated first.”

“Curiosity? Is it about what I know about ponies going into the spirit realm?”

“Exactly, though I wonder how you ended up there.” Discord snapped his fingers and appeared next to Thunderbolt in a deerstalker cap and trench coat. He had a magnifying glass in his claw and was looking at Thunderbolt through it. “You don’t seem the type.”

“Trust me, it wasn’t my choice. Not sure how much of a difference it makes now. In any case, I’m not going back if I have any say in it.”

Discord shrugged. “I don’t blame you. Spirits can be a nasty bunch. Persistent too. So if one takes an interest there isn’t much you can do to stop it.”

“How the hell are they going to find me if I never go back to the spirit realm? Do they have a spirit bloodhound?”

“No, but.” Discord sniffs the air. “Since you smell like a five-course meal I doubt that they would need one.”

“I’ll have to keep an eye out then.”

Discord shrugged and snapped his fingers. He appeared in his teacup again, this time with cucumbers on his eyes.

“Anything else?” Thunderbolt asked.

“Oh no. My curiosity is satisfied.” Discord lifted his talon. “One last thing,” he said with a smile as he lifted a cucumber in his lion’s paw. “Sleep tight.” He snapped his fingers and a white light filled the room.