In the Night
After finishing her final round of secular duties for the evening, Luna, Princess of the Moon, pulled her eyes away from the viewing glass in front of her. ‘Telescope, I believe my dear sister said they are called nowadays. An odd word, but then, that is nothing new. Most everything has changed since I was banished, and words are among the least of the oddities.’ she reminded herself. As she readied herself to move on to her more magical duties, she glanced skyward once more, checking to make sure the moon she controlled was in the right place, moving at the right speed. It was, and she decided she was ready to attend to the dreams of her subjects.
Closing her eyes, she blocked out the vision of Canterlot. Not strictly necessary, not to a dreamwalker of her experience. ‘But speaking of oddities and changes…When I was banished, this was just a gem mine. And nearly played out, at that. Now, it is a thriving, bustling city. A castle town. Full of the most snobbish, pretentious nobles and gentry…or socialites, as they are called now. That is one thing that has not changed, as much as We might have wished it.’ Luna grumbled to herself, thoughts of court and its attendant irritants making her slip into a more formal mode of speech, including the Royal We.
Suddenly, Luna’s eyes snapped open with a soft snort of annoyance, as she realized she was stalling. Again. She had already scanned the city and the horizon multiple times. More than she really needed to. Equestria was a peaceful country now, not like when she and Celestia had first ascended to become alicorns. Back then, the three tribes had been cooperative, but were still somewhat suspicious of each other. The lessons of Hearth’s Warming Eve could not be forgotten so easily, but true friendship took time. Especially on a such a large scale.
“Again!” Luna muttered vehemently, snorting again, louder this time. And stomping a hoof angrily. Checking the balcony floor, she found only a small mark, like a hoofprint in nearly dry dirt. ‘One good thing about my power returning slowly, it gives me time to grow back into it.’ she complained to herself, somewhere between irritated and depressed. With an irritated flick of her starry tail, Luna closed her eyes once more.
“Everything will be fine, Luna.” she said to herself softly, not using the Royal Canterlot voice, since she was her only audience. “You have more than enough power to do some quick rounds in the dreamscape, so long as you do not push yourself too hard.” Having finally convinced herself that all would be well, she flicked her tail one last time, took a deep breath, and let herself slip away.
She almost immediately found herself in a nigh-infinite hallway, with doors lining it as far as the eye could see. And further, too, Luna knew. Just as she knew no two of those doors would be exactly alike. The perception was strange, though. Not quite like in the waking realm, but the difference was very hard to define. But, that was the dream realm for you. At first, Luna stared at the subtly-warped surroundings for a moment, trying to figure out what exactly that difference in perception was. Something she’d gotten in the habit of when she was learning to be a dreamwalker, and never broken herself of.
But after that moment, or however long it was—the flow of time was warped here, too, just like any real dream—the princess of the night decided it was time to start her job for real, and to push herself a little, too. The doors around her suddenly flung themselves away from her, as the rest of the hall dissolved into the black velvet of the night sky, and the dream realm took on the appearance Luna had come to know so well.
The dream realm was every bit as strange as one might imagine, and Luna was not the first pony to visit. This part—the area in between the dreams, themselves—looked different to every pony who saw it. At least, eventually. When a master dreamwalker brought an apprentice, they made it look like a hallway, as that was easier on a young mind. The doors made it easy to identify just whose dream one was looking at.
For the last few days, Luna had stuck to the hall, wanting to relearn what she'd once known so well it was almost instinct, though she had pretty quickly abandoned the nameplates on the doors. She remembered enough of her old teachings to not need them. She now realized that she might have brought some of her discomfort on herself. Now that she was once more viewing the dream realm as she had come to prefer, she found a measure of peace, floating amongst the black velvet, bathing in the pinpricks of light that were the dreams of ponies near and far.
After taking a short moment to enjoy true peace, which was all too rare in the waking world, Luna shook herself, then rotated in place slowly. Not that it was true rotation, as in this inky void, there were no real directions, and movement was just a trick of the mind. It was, in some ways, almost like standing still, and having the universe itself move around you. But at the same time, it also wasn’t. It was one of those things that Luna had long ago come to accept was simply beyond the true understanding of any mortal mind. Even one such as hers or Celestia’s.
As Luna completed her turn, she noticed that all of the stars in the area were twinkling peacefully. Despite there being more stars than on the darkest of night skies, none of them overlapped, or hid another with their light. And while they all appeared identical, they were also all distinct, recognizable as individuals. Though again, the knowing of who each star was, was imparted with the same, strange dream knowledge as turning and moving. Satisfied that there was nothing needing her immediate attention, she decided to look around a bit, and go exploring, as she sometimes…okay, frequently…did.
Her first stop was to personally check in on her sister. Celestia may be older than her— “Especially now. How do my thousand years of banishment count? Do they count at all? Am I now the baby of the family?” Luna wondered aloud, mildly horrified. “No, that distinction, at least, goes to Celestia’s niece…our niece. Mi Amore Cadenza, who prefers to go by Cadance.” she reminded herself.
Unfortunately, traversing the dream realm was not something easily done when distracted, and focusing on Cadance brought Luna to her dream, which she was startled to find shining bright and steady. Dreams are strange things, and even the best dreamwalkers can only determine so much from the outside. Mostly just the intensity, and sometimes the dominant emotion. And the way Luna viewed her dream charges, Cadance’s was very bad news. Dreams may make one feel happy and peaceful, and they may make someone smile, but they seldom provide outright joy and hilarity. Those nice dreams twinkle like stars, their brightness depending on how strong the dream is. But the bad ones lack that fluctuation in brightness, shining like planets, instead. A beacon to dreamwalkers like her, letting them know something was amiss, and needed taking care of.
And a dream shining this brightly, this unwaveringly, meant that it was a terrible nightmare. After failing herself, her sister, and her ponies once before, a thousand years ago, Luna had no intention of repeating that mistake again. So, waiting only long enough to charge her power, she threw herself into the dream before her. Vowing to smite this nightmare as it deserved! To end any evil! To face any horrible sight!
Any horrible sight, that was, except this…
“OH YES, SHINING!” Cadance hollered ecstatically, as her stallionfriend made some very primal noises of his own.
Luna instantly froze, in mid-charge, her mane and tail somehow sticking straight out. Looking like nothing so much as an overgrown, exaggerated pointer dog that has suddenly spotted his prey. Luna’s face heated up so fast, it felt like it was about to boil off, as she suddenly remembered that lust can be every bit as powerful, and make a dream shine just as bright, as fear.
Part of Luna wanted to leave and give her adopted niece the privacy such a dream deserved…Okay, it actually wanted to run far, far away, and pretend this never happened, but…tomato, tomahto. The rest of her was just too stunned to do anything but watch the captain of her sister’s royal guard rutting his marefriend like there was no tomorrow. Except for a teeny-tiny part of her that wanted to stick around and watch to the end.
So she could ask Cadance why Shining was wearing her crown, of course. No other reason. None at all.
Luna finally managed to slip away, hopefully unseen, after a couple more endless minutes of horrified fascination—“NO! Confusion! Strictly confusion.” she corrected herself, as she tried to ignore the slight tingling in her nethers.
With another irritated flick of her metaphysical tail, Luna refocused on what she’d been doing before…before that happened. This time, she kept her focus where she needed to, and arrived at Celestia’s dream. Pulsing gently, it was obviously not bad. And in fact, it felt quite nice as Luna lightly pressed her hoof to it. Ever so lightly, so that she didn’t get drug in.
Not because she feared what she might find, but because she simply didn’t want to disturb her sister’s rest. Celestia was so powerful—in both magic and dreamwalking—and the sisters so close to each other, that she would never miss Luna’s presence, however faint it might be. And Luna didn’t wish to disturb her rest. This was her job, after all. Protecting Equestria and all its citizens during the dark hours. Little sister or not, during the nighttime it was her turn to protect Celestia.
Now that she was assured of her sister’s nighttime safety, Luna went in search of some of the other ponies she regularly visited. Ever since being freed of Nightmare Moon, her inner evil, Luna had been curious about the ones responsible. And while she did try to talk to her sister about Twilight and her friends, their free time was hard to come by, and harder still to match up. So Luna had taken to observing the six’s dreams—seven, if one counted Spike, which Luna could admit, she didn’t always remember to. So she spent a little time every night visiting their dreams. After all, where was one more honest with and about oneself than in a dream?
Distance in the waking world is no matter in the realm of dreams, so with a simple thought, Luna was standing…floating…whatever-ing beside Twilight Sparkle’s dream. Like Celestia’s, it was pulsing gently, and just about as brightly. After taking a moment to enjoy the sight, Luna pressed one hoof to the dream, harder than she did with Celestia’s, and she was immediately pulled in…
She found herself in Celestia’s private chambers, with Celestia herself on the bed, one wing over her student. ‘Not really much of a student anymore, from what my sister has told me.’ she thought. ‘She’s basically graduated, now, in all but name. Those friendship lessons she writes are mostly just a way to make sure the two of them stay in contact. A sneaky, little white lie.’ Suddenly, a voice from below caught her attention.
“Do I really have to go, Princess?” came an almost-whine from beneath the large, white wing.
“Yes, Twilight, I’m sorry to say you do.” Celestia responded calmly, comfortingly. Luna remembered that tone of voice from when she was younger. How it always let her know her elder sister, as powerful and busy as she might have been, cared for her. “Our lessons for the day are done, and I have matters of state that require my attention. But later tonight, I’ll try and see if I can’t at least stop in for a visit during your astronomy lesson with Luna.”
‘Now that’s a surprise!’ Luna thought. “She dreams of learning from me, too?”
“Of course I do, Princess Luna.” the purple mare said, looking up at the floating alicorn, peeking between the white feathers to do so. Luna quickly brought her hoof up to her mouth, only now realizing she’d spoken aloud. And hoping it was only the last part. Twilight Sparkle might just shrug it off as a dream, but Celestia would be a little annoyed to find out Luna had let slip about her ruse with the letters. But Twilight continued before Luna could worry too much.
“You’re a princess, so you know a lot. Especially about the night. And your duties are just as important as Princess Celestia’s. They’re a little different, and not as appreciated by most, but that doesn’t make them any less important.”
Now the dark-coated princess was holding her hoof to her mouth to stop her lips from trembling. Her eyes were watering too, not that she could do anything about that.
“That is very wise of you, my dearest student.” Celestia said, stretching her wing and fluffing it a bit, to get the feathers back in proper order. “But as I said, we both have other duties to attend to. You can talk to Luna more later tonight. But, in the meantime…” she trailed off, before opening the door.
“Twily!” exclaimed an unfortunately familiar voice, making Luna’s head shoot up, her eyes now bulging slightly in terror. There, in the doorway, was Shining Armor, again. Smaller than the last time she'd seen him, but that was not enough to mitigate Luna’s reaction. Which was, unfortunately, strong enough to make Cadance’s crown pop into existence around his horn, where she'd last seen it.
But just for a split-second, as a purple blur streaked across the bottom of Luna’s vision, distracting her enough for Twilight’s will reassert itself over her dream, vanishing the crown. Suddenly, the blur turned into Twilight, now half as tall as her brother, as the little filly she’d turned into with her brother’s arrival started jumping around, shouting with joy. The innocent, adorable glee was almost enough to scrub the debauched image from Luna’s mind.
Until Cadance stepped up beside Shining Armor and nuzzled the side of his neck tenderly. ‘He is a lot less muscular here, than he was in her dream.’ Luna suddenly realized, seeing them side-by-side, as Cadance got Twilight Sparkle’s attention. Then, all of a sudden, Luna got another terrible shock. Cadance practically presented herself for mounting, and her backside was aimed straight in Luna’s direction. The dark-coated princess didn’t stick around for the inevitable conclusion.
Back in the darkness between dreams, Luna started ranting to herself. “What was going on in there? Is that how the captain of the royal guards conducts himself at home? In front of his sister? And what about Twilight Sparkle? Dreaming about her brother and his marefriend? In front of Celestia! And Us!? I mean, it is one thing, for Mi Amore Cadenza to dream about it. The two of them are courting, after all…” Luna suddenly trailed off, as she realized that the two of them had only just started courting recently, and that Celestia had told her that Twilight Sparkle didn’t know about it. And then Luna remembered something else. Something she almost missed in her rush to escape the coming mating. Cadence had started chanting something, right there at the end. “And so did Twilight Sparkle, now that We think about it.” Luna admitted. “Something about…sunshine? And…ladybugs? Maybe? Wait, did my sister not tell me that Cadance and Twilight had some little ritual-thing, when she foalsat her? I think so.”
After thinking about it a little more, Princess Luna did remember one of the breakfast chats between the three princesses, as they all got to know each other better, just last week, in fact. Cadance had told them all about the little greeting ritual the two of them had. Feeling much relieved, the princess of the night decided to move onto another of the six.
With her mind on unicorns, she naturally gravitated towards the bearer of the Element of Generosity. Her dream was flashing a little brighter than the last two she'd seen, but not enough for fear or lust to be in control. So Luna entered the dream, hoping it would stay that way.
‘Not lust, but definitely romance.’ Luna thought to herself, seeing the purple-maned unicorn leaning up against a stallion in a room that took her a minute to recognize as one of the rooms in the castle. She almost didn’t recognize it under all the decorations. There seemed to be some kind of ball going on, at least if the food and music were to be believed. The decorations, however, were nothing like they should be for such an event. There were ribbons and streamers everywhere, in shades of purple and blue, with occasional accents of other colors. A very tasteful color palette, if entirely the wrong kind of decorations for…
“The Grand Galloping Gala?” Luna muttered softly, reading a large banner in one of the doorways. “Most definitely unbefitting an event of this importance.” Luna hadn’t actually been to one, of course—her banishment predated them by centuries—but she had heard Celestia planning—and complaining about—this year’s. It was only a couple of moons away.
Luna decided to blend into the dream and mingle with the party-goers. But then she decided against it, just as quickly. She didn’t wish to disturb the dreamer. “Rarity.” she reminded herself. An event like this would most definitely call for the Royal Canterlot Voice, but it would not be at all conducive to a romantic mood.
‘I will just save that for in case things take a more amorous turn.’ Luna finally decided, as she also figured out how to satisfy her curiosity about Rarity’s date without interfering with it. Lowering herself to the ground, Luna took her original form. Her pre-ascension, unicorn body. She started to loop around in front of the happy couple, moving through the crowd and the confetti that was falling gently, like snowflakes.
‘When did that start?’ she wondered to herself. ‘It is even more unbecoming of such an event than the rest of the decorations.’ Especially since every piece seemed to bear a gemstone, like the cutie mark of the dreamer. ‘From what Twilight Sparkle has written, Rarity is socially conscious enough to know full well that this would be unacceptable. Then again, dreams are strange and fickle things. And she is friends with that party pony.’
That was one dream she was never touching again, if she could help it. She’d done that once, two nights ago. It still scared her, honestly. Luna simply hadn’t realized that the pink, poofy-haired pony was a party pony. And an uncommonly powerful one, by the look of things. Which, in retrospect, was no real surprise, considering she bore the Element of Laughter.
Luna knew full well what party ponies were capable of. They’d existed even before the unification. They were, in fact, an integral part of it. Nothing brought ponies together like shared joy and good cheer, after all. Well, except shared hardships.
‘And with a couple of the party ponies I met, there seemed little enough difference between the two, sometimes.’ Luna thought, slowing down in her distraction. ‘If there was ever an earth pony who ascended to alicorn-hood, it would almost certainly be a party pony. I just hope that never happens. Calling someone like that family would be almost as bad as having Discord himself…’ Then another thought hit her, sending a shudder through her, and she stopped moving altogether. “Could that be where Discord actually came from?” she questioned herself, not realizing she’d said it aloud. “A party pony alicorn, fallen to her inner darkness, like I did, with Nightmare Moon? Or…well…his inner darkness, I guess I should say. I think.” Suddenly, she gave herself a little shake. “Semantics aside, I really must bring this up with my sister over breakfast. If there’s a chance it’s true, and Discord can be saved…Oh no. Breakfast.”
Trying not to think about breakfast, where she’d almost certainly see Cadance, Luna returned to her original task, only to have lost track of the seemingly happy couple. The sound of a door opening behind her made her spin around, and she was practically face-to-face with Rarity, looking gorgeous in her dress, which fit the gala far better than the decorations. And with her date.
‘Poor mare.’ Luna can’t help but think upon realizing that her date is none other than “Prince” Blueblood. Luna had only been in the capitol a few weeks, and she’d already heard he was the most crass, boring boor of an oaf in the city. The only reason anypony gave him the time of day was because Celestia was his aunt.
It was entirely an honorary title, of course, and barely even that. No, he was no more a blood-relation to Celestia than Cadance or even herself. Instead, according to Celestia, his grand-dam. ‘Grandmother.’ Luna had to remind herself. ‘That is what it is called nowadays. Mother and father. Not Sire and Dam. A dam is a construct blocking a river. Sire isn’t even a proper word, anymore.’
According to what her sister had told her when Luna had asked, Blueblood’s grandmother was a personal student of her sister’s, many years ago. Not unlike Twilight Sparkle. She had gone on to do great things, though not as great as Celestia’s current pupil, of course.
So, while Celestia’s student had remained good friends with her teacher for the rest of her life, and so had her son, that stallion's son—Blueblood—hadn’t had nearly the talent for magic of either of his predecessors. He was really little more than a hanger-on at this point, and didn’t have the shared bond of being alicorns that Cadance and Luna did, let alone the additional centuries of life together beyond even that, that Luna alone had.
Luna had tried to talk to Celestia about Blueblood’s behavior. It had mostly been hearsay, admittedly, but Cadance had joined in, and confirmed everything her new elder had said, and even added a few personal details of her own. Two generations of friends, however, earned him a lot of leeway. Especially when Celestia had talked to him about it herself, back when the rumors had first reached her ears. He told her that it was mostly just a front. Meant to chase away the social climbers, who just wanted to use him as a stepping stone to royalty.
An entirely reasonable explanation, all three alicorns around the breakfast table had agreed. But later, privately, Cadance had confided in Luna that it seemed like more to her. That she’d seen a few times where his behavior seemed a little too unrehearsed. A little too…spontaneous…or instinctive, maybe was the better word for it. She and Luna had then agreed to do their best to keep an eye on him, when they could. Of course, that had only been four days ago, and there’d been no formal events since then.
‘I am truly worried about this. My sister has not had the best track record of spotting the bad apples amongst her family.’ Luna thought, self-disparagingly. Sudden laughter brought her back to the moment, though. And seeing the pair, she remembered what started her thinking.
‘I do not know that we could consider ourselves proper friends yet, but I would still hate to see her get her heart broken at the Grand Galloping Gala. Perhaps I should put a stop to this? But how?' Luna wondered, watching Rarity dance with a stallion who was almost the exact opposite of his waking world self. As a dreamwalker, she had the ability to impress her will upon another’s dream. And as the princess of dreams, her power to do so was nigh-unrivaled.
Her first thought was to replace Blueblood with someone who was more of a true gentlecolt. But whom? Most of the ponies she knew were only a little better than Blueblood. The good ones really were all taken, snapped up in a heartbeat by mares who knew a good thing when they saw it. ‘Maybe somepony else Rarity likes? But I don’t know anypony she likes. Or who might like her.’
Luna briefly considered getting Rarity to change her own mind, by showing her the real Blueblood. But that could all too easily turn into a nightmare, and it was Princess Luna’s job to dispel nightmares. Sure, she could use one that was already underway to help teach a lesson—to help the pony in question face their true fears. But creating one whole-cloth would be anathema to her.
Besides which, Luna had wondered more than once since her rescue if her exposure to nightmares—what they contained, and what made them—had led to her becoming Nightmare Moon. Or at least hurried it along.
Then the obvious solution hit her. Replace Blueblood with one of Rarity’s friends! She’d have to turn the romance down a bit, of course, but that was easy enough. Now, which of her friends should it be?
In the end, Luna decided on swapping Blueblood for an imagining of Twilight Sparkle. Partly because they were both unicorns, and partly because Twilight was the only one Luna figured would know about how to behave at an event like the Grand Galloping Gala. Though it was tempting to put her with Applejack. There was just something about the city/country juxtaposition that got Luna's imagination going. Back before her banishment, she had preferred to mate with such ponies. They seemed to have fewer hang-ups, once they got over her being a princess.
Her next stop was the blue pegasus with the multi-colored mane. Whose name she was reminded of as soon as she entered the dream. She could hardly have done otherwise, what with all the fans who were cheering for her as she raced the Wonderbolts, and trounced them thoroughly.
Luna quickly switched her attention to the other fliers, to see how much Rainbow Dash had slowed them down. And a moment or two later, she had to admit, they seemed pretty on par with the one performance she’d seen a moon or two earlier. “Even here, in a dream like this, she shows loyalty to those she values, by not making them less than they really are.” Luna mused. And a few minutes later, she prepared to leave, adding one last comment to herself. “Hmm…If she flies half this well when she is awake, she could definitely find a place on the team in a few years. If she can learn a little self-control.”
Upon entering Fluttershy’s dream, Luna watched the yellow pegasus having a tea party with several animals, as a huge white rabbit brushed her pink mane out. After a few strokes, Fluttershy offered “Angel” some tea, and he sipped at it delicately. Intrigued, Princess Luna once again took her pre-alicorn form and hid the moons on her flanks. She didn’t want to frighten the ball of nerves, or the rabbit who looked large enough to do her some damage, should he get upset. Not that it would last, of course, but nevertheless. Then she made herself known to her hostess and asked if she could join.
For several minutes, Luna talked about weaving, a hobby she had been fond of as a filly, and which explained the black “rug” that was supposedly "Selene's" cutie mark. From there, it grew into a conversation about textile crafts in general.
Feeling much refreshed, and quite happy about how well things had gone, Luna left what felt like quite some time later, with Fluttershy none the wiser about her mysterious guest.
Or so she thought. Fluttershy wasn’t nearly as stupid and gullible as her shyness and kindness led everyone to just kind of assume. She’d realized fairly quickly who was really with her. But she appreciated that the alicorn was trying not to frighten her, and realized she was probably a little lonely, too. So she'd played along, as she often did in such situations. She did bear the Element of Kindness, after all.
From there, there was only one pony left to visit. “And one dragon.” Luna reminded herself. A thought later, and she was met with a rare sight. The light from four stars were mingling in a most unusual way. A shared dream. She entered it right away. For a shared dream like this, she’d have been willing to face Pinkie’s dreamscape.
Looking around, she found herself above an orchard. Bright red apples growing on lush, green trees, as far as the eye could see. Uncountable numbers of them. And in the middle, there was a group of ponies that, if anything, outnumbered even the trees. She swooped down among the trees, so she could find a place to hide to watch from, and try to figure this out. She was almost certain that most of the ponies here weren’t real. A shared dream that large would be entirely unheard of. After a few minutes, she'd felt a particular "resonance," for want of a better word, convincing her that her first thought was right. That this dream was merely shared four ways, with the four family members living in Ponyville. Not that “merely” was the best description, since even a four-way sharing was almost unheard of. Only the closest of ponies ever shared dreams. Lovers, or close family. Then again, the Apple family was all about family. Even more than apples, it sounded like, according to some of Twilight Sparkle’s letters.
She’d become convinced of something else in these last few minutes, too. Mingling was really not an option. She didn’t think she could manage it, with so many ponies who were so close. Plus, she somehow felt it wouldn’t be right to walk among them as an imposter. ‘Could the Element of Honesty be affecting me, somehow?’ she wondered. Either way, she opted for an invisibility spell, and once it was cast, she floated above their heads. Not using her wings, but flying like anypony might during their dreams. Even earth ponies, like these.
For what felt like hours, she hovered over them silently, seeing scenes from many different family reunions. The only time she really risked giving herself away was when she spotted a little ball of freckled fur that asked for “moar appah fwittahs?”
‘I am a centuries-old, alicorn princess. The moon itself moves at my very whims, and the world of dreams is my playground. I am not some excitable young filly, that squeals and hugs every…pwecious…adowable…wittle thing.’ she told herself, clenching her teeth so tightly it was a wonder they didn’t break. It was a hard-fought battle, but in the end, she managed to resist the urge to swoop in there and cuddle that adorable pudge-ball within an inch of her life. Just barely.
She decided to leave almost immediately afterwards, so she didn’t succumb to temptation. But arriving in the void, her mood was swiftly leveled out by a bright glow from far away. Instantly jumping there, her mood only sank further when she realized whose dream it was.
“If this isn’t a nightmare, so help me…” she muttered, reaching out towards the dream, which was flashing like a disco-ball. (Candace had showed her some pictures from a nightclub she and Shining Armor had gone to recently.)
Seconds later, she reappeared in the void, a spray of confetti and streamers popping out with her. Her eyes were wide and traumatized, and it wasn't hard to understand why. Frosting splattered across her body, with confetti stuck to it, a party hat on her horn, and a noisemaker dangling out of one side of her mouth would be bad enough, but the possum somehow tied in her mane, and small bits of cake and sprinkles in her tail only made it worse. The only mercy was that it was a balloon animal in her mane, and not a live possum. Although she wasn’t entirely convinced it was going to stay that way.
“Never again.” she mumbled, shaking. She repeated it a few more times, before cleaning herself up by vanishing everything she’d picked up in the dream. Including the elaborate calligraphy spelling out DOWN WITH BLACK SNOOTY in frosting on her right side, coated with sprinkles. Honestly, that was just insult on injury, by that point.
“It is my own fault. I knew party ponies could be an exception to the no-happy-shining-dream rule, but I went in anyway.” she rambled, trying to move past the horror she’d been subjected to. It wasn’t malicious, like Discord’s chaos had been, but it was every bit as terrifying, in its own right. “Mass murder could not be worse than that. But I am never going in there again. Never, never, never.” Even as she told herself that, in her heart of hearts, she knew she’d dive right back in if she thought it was a nightmare. And not just because Pinkie had helped free her from her own personal one. But because that’s just what a princess in her position did. “Or maybe, I will take Celestia in with me next time. She has said she wants some excitement. That ought to teach her to be careful what she wishes for. And there were a couple of pranks in our old castle I never got even with her for.”
Luna’s evil scheming was brought to a sudden halt by flare of light. Her mind now wholly back on her duty, she whisked herself away, appearing in front of a brightly glowing dream. Taking only a second to ready herself, she dived straight in.
She found herself hiding behind a stalagmite, watching an ivory-coated pony run by. She had a purple mane and tail, with a wide, pink stripe down the middle, and three wrapped, hard candies on her flank. A terrifying roar echoed down the cave a second later.
“Hey, Buzz-Boy!” Sweetie-Drops shouted. “Down here, you ursine abomination!”
“Ursine abomination?” Luna thought, confused and more than a little worried. “She is not trying to take on an Ursa, is she? No earth pony could go hoof-to-hoof with an Ursa Minor and survive, let alone an Ursa Major. No, wait. This cave isn’t big enough for an Ursa Major.” she realized, rushing down the tunnel. “Small consolation that is, though.” She was surprised by how far ahead Sweetie-Drops has gotten. Not so much by the speed, as by the fact that in anypony’s dream, the rules of the dream usually keep her closer to…her host. Dream worlds seldom stretched much further than the dreamer's eyes could see, in fact. Unless it was someplace they knew very well, like their own home.
A sudden, huge, dragging sound reached her ears, followed by an equally loud buzz. Like a million angry bees. Or just…
“A bugbear? Doesn’t that pony realize those things are only slightly less dangerous than an Ursa Minor?” She caught up to Sweetie-Drops and the bugbear just as another thought occurred to her. ‘Wait. She knows what bugbears look like? Which means they must still be around! I would have thought my sister would have gotten rid of them by now. I really must talk to her about Discord, in this case. If I’m right, we may be able to convince him to get rid of all those chimeric abominations he created. Even if I’m wrong, Twilight Sparkle and her friends might be able to convince him to at least get rid of some of them.’
A sudden scream rent the air, and Luna looked up to see a pony clutched in one of the beast’s paws. But it wasn't Sweetie-Drops. This pony appeared to be mint-green, with a blue-and-white mane.
“Lyra!” Sweetie-Drops screamed, her voice higher than it should've been, judging from what Luna had heard before. “Just one second, Lyra!”
Princess Luna started to scold herself for losing focus, but after a second, she realized she was doing it again, and it could wait until after she’d dealt with this nightmare. Just as she readied herself to dispel the great, ugly beast, Sweetie-Drops shouted “NOW!” Her voice dropped again when she did, and suddenly, there was a net around the creature, and then a cage. And Lyra was floating down to Sweetie-Drops’ arms.
“Oh, Bon Bon, thank you for saving me from that thing. It was so horrible.”
“Bon Bon?” Luna muttered. “But her name is Sweetie-Drops. I should know. It’s her head I’m inside of right now.”
“Like, just kiss me already, Lyra.” Sweetie-Drops said, now speaking in a third, separate voice.
“Oh, Bon Bon.” Lyra gasped, before kissing her as hard as she could.
Princess Luna could only stare in bafflement at what was going on in front of her eyes. Not the filly-fooling—she’d done plenty of that herself, in the centuries before her banishment. No, it was the sudden change from terrifying nightmare to hot and steamy action. She understood that some ponies got off on danger, and she enjoyed a good adrenaline rush as much as the next mare, in fact. But the mood whiplash left her reeling. Not to mention the voices. And just who was Bon Bon?
“I got you, babe.” Sweetie-Drops said, and Luna noticed the scenery had changed. Now it was a park. The pony’s voice had changed, too. Again. “Let me be good to you.” the ivory-coated mare sing-songed huskily, and with her voice lower again, it sounded pretty exciting. It definitely sounded like it excited Lyra.
“Ooh, our favorite bench.” she cooed, as Sweetie-Drops’ kisses moved down her throat. “You’re already too good to me, Bon Bon.”
Luna suddenly noted that, yes, Lyra was sitting on a bench. In a decidedly most uncomfortable looking position, but still. She also noted, as Sweetie-Drops moved even lower with her mouth, that as uncomfortable as Lyra’s position looked, it did grant her marefriend full and easy access to that all-important area between her legs that she was aiming for.
Luna suddenly realized what was going on, and not one to be a voyeur—unless she had a good chance of joining in, herself—she left this strange rollercoaster of a dream as fast as she could.
“Oh, good. Another nightmare, to take my mind off of what just happened.” she said, seeing another brightly shining dream. She took a quick breath, more for composure than need, as breathing here was totally optional. Then, like the last one, she dived straight in, only noticing at the last instant that it was another shared dream. Only two people this time, though.
“Okay, now that was weird.” she said, coming out of the dream a minute later. “Extra weird. Party pony weird, almost. Actually, never mind the almost, it was even weirder, in its own way. Those two…I mean, they weren’t even touching each other, or anything. They were just playing music, but, but…their eyes! And the one’s collar…it just sprang open. It was so intense. The sexual tension in that room was crazy. You could cut it with a knife. You could swim in it. You could drown in it! I need a cold shower. Cadence could learn a thing or two from those two—Stop! Don’t think about that!”
“Too late.” she conceded, one heavy sigh later. “I am just going to skip breakfast tomorrow. I will say I’m too tired, from overstressing myself. Of course, that is not entirely a lie. And there goes another one.” Luna said, as a very bright glow lit up the darkness around her. “Maybe I will get lucky, and it will be the middle of winter, so I can dunk myself in a lake or something.” she grumbled, focusing on the location of the glow.
A second later, Princess Luna was back with the Apples, and shrugging off her…bad/horny/she-didn’t-know-what mood. Because this time, it was unquestionably a nightmare. It turns out that some things, you just never forget. Other things…not so much. Like dreamwalking. And some of the finer details thereof. Luna had forgotten during her thousand-year banishment that lust shines, and fear glows. A difficult and subtle distinction, that’s more about the feel of the light emitted, that more or less can’t be put into words. Had she just remembered that, she might not have been in such a fix. But she hadn’t, and now here she was. Living a little nightmare of her own, while helping ponies important to her with theirs.
Just as she reached out to touch the combined dream, one of the four split away, and its glow turned into a normal, contented twinkle. Although she was curious about which of them managed to rescue herself—balance of probability, on that—she had more pressing matters, with the ones who hadn’t.
Falling into the dream felt different this time, and after a quick look around, Luna quickly figured out why. There was a…it was hard to describe, but the edges of dreams were…almost fluid. This was more…ragged. So no ordinary dream, then. But a memory, playing out as a dream. Which was a real problem, because memories were much harder to dispel than simple nightmares. They could be banished by brute force, of course, but that ran the risk of permanently damaging them. And the worst memories were every bit as important in forming a pony’s personality as the best ones.
Knowing that there was nothing to do but sit and watch, just in case there should turn out to be some way she could help, after all, Luna once more turned herself invisible and floated near the ceiling of the Apple's farmhouse.
“I am…so very sorry to be one to have to tell you this.” said a pony she didn’t recognize. He was talking to an old green mare she now recognized as Granny Smith, though she didn’t look quite as old as she had earlier this night. Until Luna looked a little closer at the mare’s eyes, and then she could almost see the years piling on.
“Well…it’s not yer fault.” she says slowly. “You got nuthin’ to be sorry fer, Sheriff. These things happen, and they gotta happen to somepony. We’ve had plenty o’ the good. It only stands to reason that we gotta take a little o’ the bad now an’ then, to even it out.”
“Well, that’s probably one of the best ways there is to look at it.” the sheriff agreed awkwardly. Uncomfortably. After a minute, he cleared his throat and spoke up again. “Uh, if you don’t mind me asking, where are the youngin’s?”
“Well, Macintosh’s out bucking apples. Applejack and Applebloom are visitin’ a unicorn family in town. They got two daughters, th’…th’ same age as Bright…” Granny had to stop for a second and take a deep breath before she could continue. “The four girls are all about the same ages.” she finishes.
“Would you…would you prefer I stay to tell them, or…”
“No. No, it’s me what should do it, and I think it'd be better comin' from me alone. I thank ya fer the offer, though.” Granny insisted.
“Alright then.” the sheriff agreed, though he didn’t look like he believed her completely. He definitely didn’t believe he could change her mind, though. “If you ever need anything, Granny—”
“I know, I know. I jes’ have to ask. I will, if I need it. I ain’t the fool I use t’be, blinded by pride and stubbornness.”
“Alright.” the sheriff agreed, still awkward. He finally put his hat on and opened the door. “Would you like me to call Macintosh in from the field for you?”
“Nah, he’ll be along soon enough.”
“How about your girls? The family they’re visiting is on my way back to the office.”
“Nah, they’ll be comin’ along home around sundown. That’s soon enough fer ‘em to hear about this.”
“Too soon.” the sheriff muttered as he closed the door behind him. Quietly, but just loud enough for Luna’s ears to pick up, and she nodded without thinking.
“Too soon, all around.” Granny said, her voice starting to crack, as she leaned back against the closed door, proving it hadn't been quiet enough to escape her ears, either. Luna could only nod again. And when she saw the tears leaking from the tightly clenched eyes, she let a few of her own slip free in sympathy.
Sometimes, the subjective time of dreams really, really sucked. What felt like a short lifetime later, Luna emerged from the dream, but some special sense that only she and her sister seemed to have told her night was nowhere near done. She thought watching Granny Smith learning about Bright Mac and Buttercup’s fate was bad, but it was nothing compared to watching her pass the news on to her grandfoals. Honestly, she wasn’t sure what was worse. Seeing Big Macintosh and Applejack realize the truth, or barely-weaned Applebloom being too young to understand, and realizing that heartbreak was still coming for her. Not to mention all the times the others would have to reopen their wounds, before she did understand her parents weren’t coming back.
Luna was no stranger to loss, of course. At her age, it was impossible not to have lost a few people she loved. Including her own parents. But she’d been fully-grown at the time and looking for a mentor in the ways of magic. Not yet an alicorn, but in no way still a foal, so it didn’t really compare. And she’d never given much thought to foals of her own. Of her body, as Cadance seemed intent on having, or more metaphorically, like her elder sister and her students. Not that anyone had ever wanted to be her student. Just one more secret seed of jealousy, though this one had remained secret even to herself, until Nightmare Moon had taken over.
With the memory of what she'd just witnessed fresh in her mind, she couldn’t bring herself to feel anything more than the most muted reactions of guilt or anger. Not that she’s particularly upset about not feeling the nigh-crippling levels of guilt and self-loathing such thoughts usually brought about. But at the moment, all she wanted was something simple and…pure…to try and cleanse the residual sadness. But where to find it?
The first thing that came to mind was Applebloom, the only one of the four to escape the shared dream before it turned…heartbreaking. That idea was discarded immediately. She may have escaped the memory, but it was probably only because she was too young to really remember it. Or her parents. Which only made the Princess of the Night feel worse. Any fool could recognize that that would not be an escape.
An astronomy lesson with Twilight Sparkle sounded good for a second, until she thought it through. She wasn't sure she could stand to have a student looking up to her like that at the moment. Too close to the family feeling to torture herself with. Not to mention, she wasn't not sure she could handle being around her sister right now. Not even Twilight Sparkle’s dream-version, with its differences from the real personality.
And if Twilight Sparkle was out of the question, then so was Rarity’s dream. And if she’d changed it back to what it had been originally, Luna wasn't sure she could handle dealing with her idiot “nephew.” Rainbow Dash was a little too much a braggart, which could be entertaining in its own way…at the right time. This was just not the right time, though. Fluttershy would be a perfect choice, honestly. Except Luna felt she’d taken enough of the pegasus’ time for one night. Plus, she didn’t want to push her luck and risk being caught out. That just left…
“Spike! Of course!” Luna exclaimed, blushing slightly at having forgotten about him again. True, she had tended to avoid dragons’ dreams in the past—they weren’t at all pleasant. But Spike had essentially been raised a pony, so it shouldn’t be too terrible. And at his age…
“Wait. Just what is his age, exactly?” Luna wondered aloud. “I know my sister and everypony else refers to him as a baby dragon, but he also serves as Twilight Sparkle’s assistant, and probably does as much work as a pony who counts twice his number of years. And he must be highly competent, for she does not strike me as the kind of pony to accept less than that, any emotional connections aside.”
Luna was not quite sure what the relationship between the pony and the dragon was, even after hearing from her sister how Spike had been hatched by Twilight Sparkle as a school entrance test. That was not much of a surprise, though, as even Celestia herself did not really know what the relationship was. She didn’t think her student was exactly sure, either. In all honesty, Luna would not be much surprised to learn that Spike himself didn’t have enough experience to know. Or even if he did, he might very well not have words to describe it. Everyone seemed to just kind of assume Spike had imprinted on Twilight Sparkle as his dam…his mother. Although it may or may not have been actual imprinting, in the way birds did, and more like the way ponies grew to love their caregivers.
It seemed that no one was saying anything because they didn’t want to come across as racist or ignorant. Although the ignorance was nearly unavoidable, considering how almost nothing was known about dragons. There was a chance that Fluttershy, with her broad knowledge of non-pony beings, might know, but it seemed unlikely that she wouldn't have passed it along by now, if so. Then again, she was shy enough that if she hadn’t been asked the right question, she might not have given the answer. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to ask the next time she met up with the mare. Maybe even tomorrow night.
But now that Luna had made up her mind to try visiting Spike’s dreams, she stopped floating aimlessly among the stars.
In a couple of seconds, she was opening her eyes to a sparkly cavern.
“Don’t worry, my love, I’m coming for you!” echoed down the cave. The voice was still barely recognizable as Spike, despite being deeper and more resonant than the few times she’s heard the baby dragon speak.
‘Perhaps his feelings for his guardian are clearer than we thought.’ Luna thought, just before being blinded by a gout of green fire, which was reflected off all the gems studding the cave walls. Once the darkness behind her eyelids returned to what it should be, she opened her eyes again, and started toward where the baby dragon had been, though she expected he’d moved towards ‘his love.’ She was proven correct mere seconds later.
“Don’t worry, my darling. I’ll be with you in five minutes.” This time, Luna’s sharp ears caught the sound of him taking a deep breath in preparation for his firebreath. She had just enough time to close her eyes before the roaring crackle of a large gout of fire once again lit up the cavern. As the sound died out, she thought she heard yelping, like dogs. But bigger than any dogs she’d ever encountered, outside of Cerberus and Orthros. Maybe even bigger than a pony, but that was probably just a trick of her ears. Then what she'd heard him say really hit her.
‘Darling, huh? It seems you’ve spent too much time with Rarity of late, Spike.’ she thought.
“Make that three minutes.” Spike suddenly amended. “It seems I greatly overestimated the courage of these diamond dogs. For all their numbers, they’re nothing but cowardly curs, after all.”
‘Diamond dogs?’ Luna wondered. ‘Weren’t they the ones that originally excavated the gem mines under Canterlot?’ She didn’t remember them as particularly cowardly—except, arguably, in their combat tactics...Such as they were. Then again, a lot could change in a millennium, and more importantly, this was a dream, after all.
Now more curious than before, Princess Luna rushed forward and soon caught up to Spike, as he finished off the last of a group of diamond dogs. They looked much the same as she remembered them. But she barely noticed them, because almost all her attention was on Spike. She’d met enough dragons before her banishment to know they came in all shapes and sizes. Four-legged and reptilian, like Torch—whom Luna had known before he claimed the title of Dragon Lord. Some were four-legged, but also straight-legged, like ponies. Then there were the ones that were more classically shaped. Quadrupedal, but lanky, like the one that had moved into a cave near Ponyville, soon after her rescue. There were serpentine ones, too, though there were critics on both sides claiming they weren’t really dragons, since they preferred to live in rivers. Rivers of water, rather than magma, that is. And there were bipedal varieties, too. Lanky ones, and those that were as top-heavy as any minotaur.
Spike had clearly based his dream-self on that last category, as his arms were thicker than his legs, and almost thicker than his waist. And the rest of his upper body was just as…ripped? Luna thought that was the word the minotaurs used. Honestly, it was over-the-top enough that when it was combined with the shiny plate armor and Spike’s cheesy grin, it made him look exactly like the overgrown little boy he was.
And that was exactly what Luna needed to get over the Apples’ dream. She took cover behind a stalagmite for the second time tonight, wanting to remain hidden from Spike. For the sakes of both their dignities, she didn’t want him to catch her with her huge grin. She covered her mouth to help muffle her snickering and giggling. Spike soon started down a tunnel, but not before grabbing a clawful of gems out of the nearest wall and shoving them in his mouth. This earned another undignified snort of mirth from the hidden princess.
Luna then followed Spike at a discreet distance, using her night-vision to the utmost. Hers was better than most ponies, but then, what kind of Princess of the Moon, and Dreams, and All Things Night would she be if it wasn’t? It allowed her to stay far enough from Spike to avoid his notice, but still close enough to see him moving forward confidently, practically strolling. Hesitating only briefly, once in a while, to pluck a single gem or two from the many clusters on the walls and ceiling of the cavern.
As Spike promised, within three minutes, he strolled into a large chamber, on the opposite side of which was an iron door, like the seldom-used dungeons in Canterlot Castle. After loudly proclaiming his arrival, he strode right up to it and grabbed it with both claws. After giving it an experimental shake, he told Twilight Sparkle to step back, so she didn’t get unnecessarily heated by his fire-breath. He called her his love again, which by now, Luna found most amusing. She had started to suspect he didn’t really mean it like it had first sounded, and he was simply talking like the knights of the books he’d clearly drawn this entire scenario from.
Leaning in close to one side of the door, Spike blew a small puff of flame—hardly bigger than a candle's flame—but it melted the hinge. Then he repeated it with the lower hinge, and finally with the lock. He then casually tossed the iron bars aside, and gave a quick, gratuitous flex of his forelegs. ‘Arms.’ Luna remembered belatedly. She was a little too used to quadrupeds, like ponies and griffons. These thoughts and her muffled laughter almost caused her to almost miss the voice coming from inside the cell.
“Oh, Brave Sir Spike.” the pony inside said dramatically.
‘Wait. That didn’t sound like Twilight Sparkle.’ she realized. Neither the voice nor the delivery. Casting a quick invisibility spell on herself, she moved until she was looking right over “Brave Sir Spike’s” shoulder. And when she spotted a certain, white-coated, purple-maned unicorn, she almost gave herself away with a gasp.
“Oh, Brave Sir Spike.” Rarity—who was wearing a rather ridiculous dress, though it did seem like something from a fairy-tale—repeated. This time, she got a few more words in, though. “I’m ever so glad you saved me. Can you believe those brutes were going to make me work? Do physical labor? I shudder to even think how awful it could have been if you hadn’t saved me from them. Oh. Oh, I think I feel faint!” Then, with hoof to forehead, she wobbled a little.
“Before you do that, my sweet Lady Rarity, I wish to apologize for letting those animals take you in the first place. With these.” Spike interrupted, reaching into the top of his armor. Rarity immediately straightened up, all four hooves flat on the floor, and eyes bright and sharp. Not greedy, though. ‘Excited, expectant, and a little curious, but…loving? Is that the word I want?’ Luna wondered, looking closely as Spike rummaged under his breastplate for a couple seconds. ‘Yes, I think it is. This is most interesting.’
Suddenly, Spike pulled his hand out of his armor, holding out the gems he’d collected along the way. But instead of a bunch of loose gems, they had reshaped themselves into a single, perfect, jewel rose.
“Oh, Brave Sir Spike!” Rarity said for the third time in as many minutes, this one with a clear and blatant swoon in her voice. “Oh, it’s just so beautiful, I can’t…so perfect…I must…” Her foreleg returned to her forehead, and this time she sprang up on her back legs, spinning around, and collapsing.
Onto a raspberry-colored fainting couch that just appeared from nowhere. Luna was caught by surprise, and judging from Spike’s full-body twitch, he was, too. Which was odd. ‘Where did that come from?’ she thought.
“Where did that come from?” Spike echoed, confirming Luna’s guess that this wasn’t part of his plan.
“Oh, you know me.” Rarity giggled coyly. “I can take pretty good care of myself.” But before Spike could react to this at all, his “sweet lady” gave him a playful wink. “Most of the time.” she added flirtatiously. “But it is ever so nice to know I have a big, strong knight to help me out when I really need it.” She then held out one hoof, looking expectant.
“Oh, ah…sure. Um…Here.” the “Brave Sir Spike” stuttered in an endearingly awkward way that had Luna making a muffled, suspiciously ‘awww’-like noise deep in her throat. She watched him bashfully hold out the multi-colored rose. To both their surprise, however, Rarity ignored the rose, grabbing Spike’s wrist and pulling him down to plant a kiss on him. A chaste kiss, over as quickly it started, but still right on the lips, for all that.
If Luna hadn’t had both hooves over her mouth already, she’d have let out a gasp worthy of Pinkie Pie. ‘Oh my.’ she thought. ‘If only I had known this earlier this evening, I would have spent more time with Rarity, and seen how it might have gone.’ She kept watching, not really aware of the grin on her face, which grew bigger as Spike’s face grew redder.
But before anything else could happen, a massive quake hit, and an indecipherable voice echoed through every bit of rock and air, the volume putting even Celsetia’s Royal Canterlot Voice to shame. It took only an instant for Luna to realize what was happening, and she removed herself from the dream.
Just in time to see the star representing Spike disappear from the dream realm she was floating in.
Around her, Luna sensed other stars going out as the earliest risers in Equestria were starting their day. So she withdrew her spirit back to her body, opening her eyes and gauging that there was less than a minute before the sunrise. She turned to face the inside of the castle, so she didn’t get blinded by her sister’s magic. It wouldn’t be the first time—it wouldn’t even be the hundredth—but it was never fun.
'Time to make my excuses.' she thought, heading inside.
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