The Ash of Fallen Stars

by Wings of Black Glass

Parents

“Sable? Are you feeling better?” Mom knocks on my door, which squeaks open, I hadn’t locked it. She’s got a large book of some sort under her arm.

“Yeah, I think I am.” I drop the rag I was using to clean up all the dust on the dresser before turning towards her. She glances around the room, somewhat bewildered. I was trying to clear my mind by clearing my old room. I guess it was working. “It’s kind of weird seeing it like this. As if it were just dropped out of time.”

“I don’t actually know why we never did anything with it. It’s a whole room, how did we simply forget about it?”

“That’s… my fault, again.” I sigh and look out through the window. “My spell… my curse… it blocked you from remembering me or anything about me. If you ever looked in here, it would trigger, and you would be forced to forget it. I can only imagine that eventually, you acclimated to it and simply stopped noticing the door.” I can feel the strain rising again behind my analysis of the curse and its effects.

“Sable… it’s alright.” Apparently, she heard it too. Her tone is soft, forgiving.

“It really isn’t.” I had no right to manipulate them like that, it doesn’t matter how wretched I felt at the time.

“You were trying to spare us the pain you knew we would feel when you ran away.” Was I? That’s not how I remember it. Better then, if that is what she chooses to believe. “I want to show you something.” She sets the book on the bed where we can both see and opens it.

It’s a photo album. The first few pages are filled with images of a tiny foal wrapped in blankets, a purple Unicorn child. She flips through it, and the little foal ages rapidly as the pages turn. From first birthday cake to first Nightmare Night costume, and then older to the first day of school and still older. None of it is familiar to me now.

“Is that really me?” I know the answer, who else could it be? Mom doesn’t have to say anything, giving an assent with a simple hum.

“Do you remember this?” She stops flipping the pages when she comes to a picture of that smiling little foal standing beside a snowpony with a carrot sticking out its head in a laughable imitation of a unicorn horn. “This was the first time you got to play outside after fresh snowfall. Well, the first time you were old enough to enjoy it.”

“No… I’m afraid I don’t.” Building a snowpony does sound like fun, I have no reason to doubt her. Yet that day is nothing but a hole in my mind when I try to think back to it.

“You kept trying to build wings for it, and even when they fell off, you kept working on it. You kept calling it a snowlicorn.” I glance back at my own side, where my own glass wings are folded. Even as a child, I seemed to have wished for wings. I can only imagine the smile that little innocent version of me would give if he could see me now. “Now that I think about, I think that was the first time we noticed you were good with magic.”

Gently I take the album from her and start looking through it myself. The foal ages as the pages turn, a tenth birthday party, building some model with my Dad, sitting at the loom with my Mom. Some precious few of the images stir something in my mind.

Then I find myself looking at the Canterlot skyline over my shoulder. The palace in the distance, and Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns in the foreground. I can almost feel the wind as I stuck my head out the train window as it approached the city, I was so thrilled to be there, ready to take the test. The first time, and the second, and even the third despite the apprehension. Most of all, I can feel the pit in my gut as the schoolhouse loomed over me the fourth time I stood in front of those doors. It was my last chance… where would I be now had I done just a little better?

“Sable?” My Mom taps me on the shoulder, I flinch and nearly lurch away, brought back to this moment. “Is something wrong?” I blink back my tears and blindly search for something to say.

“That was the first time I took the entrance exam, wasn’t it?”

“You remember!” Her sheer joy is more than I can bear, and I flip the page back towards the start before I sink back down into that pit.

“There’s a story to each of these pictures, isn’t there?”

“Each and every one.” Although I’m not looking at her, I can hear the smile in her voice.

“Would you be willing to tell them to me?” It’s not just a dodge to avoid the Canterlot topic, my childhood is here… even if I don’t remember it. “Please?”

---

Luna stretches as she wakes, perhaps slightly earlier than usual. Bright-eyed and alert, she draws open the curtains to let the sun in and warm the bedchamber. Not at all groggy or weary, she slept well this day.

As she slips on her peytral and crown, she examines herself in the mirror. No stoic disinterested mare gazes back. Her face is comfortable and calm, with just the slightest upturn in her cheeks. For once, she doesn’t have to remind herself to smile. With her mane and tail brushed, she strides out into the palace to find breakfast.

Her shoes click rhythmically on the clean stone, and the sound melds into the echoes of other ponies about the halls. There are more than usual here today, or maybe she’s just up early. A cluster of administrators hangs about the closed door to the main audience hall, looking at each other with some concern over the noise she can already hear from the hall. They bow to her and step back to give her space, she responds with a nod.

The discordant chaos of shouted words grows louder as she approaches the audience hall, it sounds like an argument of some sort. Although the heavy door muffles the exact words, she can make out several distinct ponies, including her sister, as she struggles to contain the anger behind the raised voices.

Very briefly, Luna pauses before entering, hesitant to ruin her excellent mood. Her decision is made for her when the door suddenly swings open and four ponies exit in pairs, grumbling to each other and defiantly refusing to even glance in the direction of their counterparts. So determined are they to avoid so the other couple that they almost walk right into Luna. She ducks beneath the hovering stack of papers one drags alongside and slips into the audience hall to find Celestia standing at the window with a mild frown.

“At least the shouting has stopped. Good afternoon, sister.” When Luna announces herself, the white Alicorn turns from the window.

“Luna!” Celestia’s face alights with a quick smile. “Is it afternoon already? I’m afraid I’ve lost track.”

“What was the argument about? Is there something I may assist with?”

“Only if you know about the value of birch planks compared to bolts of cotton. Manehatten and Fillydelphia are having trade disputes again.” Celestia sighs and faces the window again. “At least all the damage it’s doing this time is giving me a headache.”

“It has been worse?”

“Much worse.” Celestia’s voice fades away, and her eyes focus on a distant point in the sky for a moment as she recalls some ancient conflict. Luna once again silently reminds herself that she still has much history to read. A few moments later, Celestia shakes off her recollections, and she faces Luna properly. “No sense worrying about those old conflicts. You seem to be in a good mood.”

“That I am. I told you it would pass.”

“Indeed, you did, and I am pleased to see it happen. It brightens my day considerably already.”

“Then, I think I will hang about and continue to do so.” Luna gestures to the administrators just outside, giving them a few moments together before barging in. “I will assist if I can with your duties.”

“I doubt it will be all that interesting, but I certainly won’t stop you.” Celestia waves towards the gathered ponies, and they all come forward.

During the next few hours, Celestia and Luna take meetings with various lobbyists and interest groups. Many of the details of what they ask are lost to Luna. While she speaks, papers are passed before Celestia, and she either signs them or frowns and sends them away for revision. The ease with which Celestia manages the minutia of running a kingdom doesn’t surprise Luna, although she is a bit jealous that much of it flies over her head. She has to stop the discussions several times to have some term or other clarified and finds she has little to add to the conversation.

During an idle moment between meetings, she glances out the window to watch the comings and goings of the palace grounds. Pacing at the edge of the courtyard, separate from the cluster of tourists, is a single figure. From here and at first glance, she mistakes them for a black stallion, but when she looks again, she realizes that it’s a pony wearing a black coat. It couldn’t be anypony but Stardust, no other pony would wear a jacket like that on a bright day like today. What would he be doing here at this time of day? He glances towards the palace a few times but resumes his pacing after only an instant. Something must be on his mind.

Before the next ponies are brought in to speak with them, she spies Stardust casting a spell, impossible to see what from this distance, and a tiny dark-blue bird flits away from him. A grey Pegasus guard approaches him, Luna doesn’t recognize him by sight, probably reprimanding him for doing magic within the palace grounds without permission. Stardust allows the other stallion to speak for a moment, before nodding and then leaping off the railing and disappearing. Luna smiles, imagining the shock on the poor guard’s face when Stardust reappears in the air, flying off on his glass wings.

She returns her attention back to the ponies now arriving to speak with them, a rather bookish lot with many charts and large scrolls, historians most likely. They begin a presentation outlining a plan to restore several old structures within Canterlot whose maintenance has been neglected, asking for permission and for funding. They’ve only been speaking for a few moments before something disturbs the guards at the door. A tiny dark-blue object darts in and out of view as it speeds down the hallway towards the audience hall chased after by a few shouting guards. The historian’s presentation stutters to a stop as they all stare at the impossible-to-ignore commotion comes closer.

Luna almost laughs as they stumble and trip over themselves. Try as they might, the guards can’t seem to catch the little thing as it slips under and around them. It lands on the stone just in front of Luna, and the guards all slide to a halt before they slam into the historians or either princess. Some of them seem to be panting. Luna looks down at what had appeared to be a little bird, but turns out to be an animated paper swan, and then frowns at the inability of the guard to stop even this little thing. Out the corner of her eye, she spots Celestia giggling quietly.

“It would seem I have a message I must tend to. Please, continue.” Luna lifts the messenger bird from the floor and takes it over towards the window. She waves the guards off dismissively, mentally making a note to talk to the guard captain about their poor performance. The little paper bird flaps its wings helplessly in her aura as she takes a closer look. It is as she thought, the same little bird that flew away from Stardust and a messenger spell. She takes it with one hoof, and the bird unfolds into a flat paper. The message is short.

To Princess Luna,

I apologize for any inconvenience my messenger causes. I know we speak often, but I need would like to speak with you. I have discovered something, and I really need to talk to somepony about it. If you have a few minutes sometime today, I would like to meet with you. I will be in the public area of the palace gardens, at least until the guards chase me out in the evening.

-Stardust

The writing is unsteady, unsure, rather unlike she would have expected. She hadn’t seen him write it when she was looking out the window, he must have written it earlier and been working up the will to send it to her. She glances back over her shoulder at the historians in time to hear one of them say something about the effects of dry rot on a structure’s foundations. Somehow Celestia appears to actually be paying attention. Luna glances down at her note and knows she won’t be able to do the same. She returns and waits for a break in the speech to speak.

“I apologize, but I have another matter to attend to.” The historians seem a bit downhearted but nod anyway. Celestia shoots her a questioning glance but says nothing. There is another moment of silence while the historians politely wait for her to depart before launching back into their presentation. The remaining groups outside, waiting their turn, nod slightly to her as she passes.

Once outside, she turns towards the gardens, not sure exactly where she expects to find him. Somewhere out of the way and secluded, probably. More to the point, she doesn’t know what it is that could shake him so much that he would seek her out during the day.

He isn’t by the tree she usually sits under, or out in the hedge maze. Nor is he hiding at the base of the walls or in the most secluded far corner. She takes to the air, and only then finds a dark blotch sitting by one of the fountains. He’s staring into the water, his head on the stone, paying no attention to what’s going on around him.

“I received your message.” She lands across the fountain and drops the paper bird on the stone next to him. His eyes flick to her reflection for a moment and then fall away. His lack of immediate answer worries her, especially since this meeting was his request. “You wanted to talk?” Again his eyes shift to her momentarily. Yet, he says nothing. Whatever he discovered must have shaken him more than she thought. She knows him just well enough that she can tell his hesitation is a sign of contemplation, not a wish for her to be gone.

If he doesn’t want to speak, then she’ll let him think. At least his message got her out of the meeting with the historians. She folds her legs under her as she settles on the other side of the fountain to wait for him to find something to say. It isn’t long before a familiar feathered friend finds her there, but the swallow seems reluctant to come close to a pony he doesn’t know and hops back and forth atop a nearby hedge for a few moments before deciding against it and flitting off.

“Tell me about your parents.” At last, he speaks, still not meeting her eye to eye or even reflection to reflection.

“My parents?” She has to look up at the clouds, it’s mildly overcast above. “I haven’t thought about them in years.” In truth, far longer. “They died more than a millennium ago. Why?”

“Please.” Why would this question cause him pain?

“If you were hoping to find some great secret, you will be disappointed. They were plain of birth and ambition, content to be simple ponies. When my sister and I set out to explore the world, even before we found our marks, they supported us. They didn’t try to hold us back, knowing it wasn’t what we wanted to stay there, but despite this, this wouldn’t leave their home.” The sweet face of her mother comes back to her, and she smiles. “When we met Starswirl, he took us in and taught us to use our magic. I can honestly say that I sometimes felt as though he was our father, it was he who really raised us. Even then, we would return to visit them on occasions, at least until we found our marks and became the rulers of Equestria. Our duties made it difficult to go back very often, and we grew apart. The last time I saw them, they were still quite happy to live their last years in the isolated village they called home.” Throughout her explanation, Stardust remained silent and nearly immobile. “What brought up this question?”

“I think…” He hesitates again, “I found my grandfather.”

“I was not aware you had lost him.”

“I… never knew about him in the first place.” The apprehension in his voice made it clear to Luna that he needs to say this without interruption, so she stays silent. “Dad didn’t talk about his family. I never knew why, and I didn’t ask.” His head, still resting on the stone, tilts as he considers something. “Now that I think about it, he seemed unnerved by something those times I came here for the entry exam for Celestia’s school. I think I know why now.” Despite all the questions, this raises for her, she remains quiet. “I think he was worried he would run into Equinox.” He doesn’t explicitly say, but it seems clear to her this Equinox is his grandfather.

This is more than he has ever spoken about his past. She knows so little about him that despite his discomfort, she welcomes the information. That he had gone to Celestia’s school does not surprise her, the skill needed to create his wing spell is considerable. Although… he used the plural when referring to the exam, perhaps it did not go well.

“I’m sorry.” He stands suddenly, readying to leave. “I shouldn’t have bothered you with this. It’s not important.”

“Stardust, wait.” She reaches out towards him, he’s well out of range, but the motion causes him to stop. “Yes, it is. I know you well enough to know you wouldn’t have asked for me if it wasn’t.” He doesn’t look at her, his eyes locked on the ripples in the water. “I know it’s hard; I know how it’s like to be uncertain.” He flinches for some reason she cannot fathom. “Please, talk to me.” He visibly hesitates, right on the verge of turning away. But then he sighs and sits back down, still not meeting her eye to eye.

“I don’t know what to do.”

“What about your parents?” She wants to think he just flinched again, but it seemed to be something else. “Can you not go back and ask your father?” That same grimace again on his face, riddled with pain and confusion no matter how hard he tries to hide it.

“I… haven’t spoken to either of my parents in years.” Now something new in his expression, fear. “I ran from home so long ago.” Luna blinks, his answer entirely unexpected. “I couldn’t stay, not after what happened.” Luna knows better now than to ask. He grasps at his head, in despair or in pain, she can’t be sure. “I… I never should have.”

“I have been distant from my family before, I know what that is like.” She sighs. “If you go back, I am certain you would be welcomed home. You can have your family back.” For a second time, it seems to her as if his head were ringing like a struck bell. His face scrunches up, now obviously in some pain.

“If only they were still alive.”

“They’re dead?” She can’t stop her surprise.

“What? No. They live in a little village called Pinewood.”

“But you just said…” she blinks, confused. He doesn’t seem to have heard her.

“I couldn’t even bury them…” He shifts from one despair to another, and her concern grows. “It was all my fault. They don’t even know me anymore. I wish I knew where they were.” Luna frowns, trying to piece together his incoherent speech. Stardust’s condition worsens visibly, his eyes no longer focus on anything, and his limbs shake. His wing’s glass panels clatter against each-other violently. His words begin to slur together nearly to unintelligibility. “Only real memory… watched them die!”

“Stardust, what are you saying?” It’s no use, he either isn’t listening or can’t hear her. As she stands to try and help him, Luna recalls all of the previous times she has seen him distressed. Each one was barely more than a twitch or instant of confusion, but she thought he was simply tired or stressed. This is so much worse. She rounds the fountain between them, although he doesn’t react as she stands beside him. She wants to reach out to help him, but she’s worried he’ll react poorly to her touch.

“Wasn’t Despair that did this to them.” He stands abruptly, bouncing against her and reeling away. For one brief instant, he looks to her with his face wracked by pain and fear, and somehow, hate. “It was me!”

“Stardust, are you alright?” Something blue flashes before her eyes, lightning lancing off his horn and scorching the ground between them. The attack stuns her emotionally, she wasn’t hit, but she didn’t think he would strike out at her at all. Stardust stumbles back, glancing about frantically, desperate for some kind of escape. His wings flare unevenly as he readies to leap into the air, but he’s got no proper footing and no wind to catch, so his leap instead sends him tumbling to the ground.

Whatever reservations she might have for disturbing him, his own safety overrides them. His thrashing is more than she is willing to risk with her own limbs, but she reaches out with her magic to lift him from the ground so he can’t hurt himself. He is, most definitely, not alright.

A strange static charge builds in the air, she can’t tell from where, setting her hair on end. She spots the spell building around Stardust’s horn too late to stop it. He flashes out of reality in an improper teleport that cracks the air like a blast of thunder. She’s so close to him that she has to shield her eyes with her forelimb. He could have vanished to anywhere but reappears only on the other side of the fountain. The boom from the spell sets her own ears ringing. Voices shout in the distance, probably guards startled by the sound.

Luna struggles to get another grip on him, but he’s still thrashing about and trying to teleport away. His concentration is so shattered that she doesn’t even have to try and disrupt his magic.

“Get off!” He kicks out at air, nowhere near her. Luna can’t even tell if his shout was directed at her. She backs away regardless, he might lash out with magic again.

The first guard arrives, followed by a cluster of others. Acting on reflex and training, they ready themselves to attack Stardust and move to surround him. Luna grimaces, Of all the times for the guards to suddenly show competence…

“Don’t hurt him!” Luna shouts, giving it the weight of an order. “Stay back! He’s not himself!” The guards do as commanded, backing away slightly, although they don’t drop out of their attack stances.

As he stumbles about, Stardust’s wings crash into the fountain’s side and explode into a shower of magical glass fragments. The shards fizzle out into nothing before they even touch the ground, but the shock seems to stun the distressed stallion. He stands still for a moment, wobbling from side to side.

“I’m sorry.” Tears stream down his face from one eye. “It was me. I’m so sorry.” With a heavy thud, he collapses onto his side, panting heavily. The guards glance at each other and at Luna, looking for instruction. She dashes to Stardust’s side, only now do the guards drop out of their aggressive postures.

Luna feels for his pulse, his heart is pounding like a racehorse, but unsteady. He doesn’t react to her touch, his eyes seeing something she can’t. She drapes one wing over him like a shock blanket and jabs the other one towards the nearest guard, the same grey Pegasus she saw tell off Stardust earlier.

“You! Get the doctor!” The stallion has barely begun to process the order when she shouts again. “Now!” Hoofbeats hammer the stone before he leaps into the air and darts away towards the hospital. Luna briefly considers that it might be wise to have a doctor placed within the guard’s barracks, to save time in case of another emergency, then she returns her attention to the distraught pony at her side. “It’s alright, my friend, help is coming.” But he still can’t hear her, and only keeps repeating three words.

“It was me… It was me…”

Author's Note:

Part 3: "Stardust and Equinox" ends.

Comments

[PizzaculousPony]

Soooo...Did Stardust remember everything or just the fact that he Men in Blacked his family?

[PizzaculousPony]

Apart from that, I really liked the update :)

[Wings of Black Glass]

10096462
It's... complicated. And the answer to that question is a key component to the climax. so... spoilers.

[PizzaculousPony]

10096796
XD I was like: "OooH! A spoiler tag!" *uncovers it* "...ARE YOU FFFFFFfffffffffff-ricking kidding me?! AAAAAAAARGH THIS IS GONNA KILL MEEEE!!!!"
Ok...I’ll be a good person and ignore that :/

[Luckyfanisaac]

“Then, I think I will hang about and continue to do so.” Luna gestures to the administrators just outside, giving them a few moments together before barging in. “I will assist if I can with your duties.”

tiny dark-blue object darts in and out of view as it speeds down the hallway towards the audience hall chased after by a few shouting guards.

“It was me… It was me…”

0:50

[Wings of Black Glass]

10131807
Hey, I remember that episode. But I imagine Stardust saying that less stoically than Mojo there, and a bit more broken.