Fairlight - Memories of a Perfect Sky

by Bluespectre

Chapter Four - Explanations from another world

CHAPTER FOUR

Explanations from another world

My companion knelt to take a long drink from the pool we had stumbled across whilst trudging ever onward into the unknown expanse. I didn’t feel thirsty at all myself, and even if I had the water looked more like quill ink than something you’d find in Equestria. Unless you were in a stationers shop that is. On our journey to wherever the crystals light was taking us, I’d made a game for myself of marking time by counting Shades’ bones. I don’t think he much cared either way, the thestral was a free spirit and would probably grow bored sooner or later, leaving to go his own way. Speaking of Shades, I wondered where all the other thestrals were? I hadn’t seen any other animal life in this land for weeks, unless you counted that vile creature in the river. I presumed that there must be more like him out there somewhere, but if there was a population of thestrals here, they were well hidden. My companion wasn’t giving much away either. He didn’t speak much, and when he did it was more often than not simple one-word replies. But, he knew my name and called me friend. And that was enough for me.

“Shades?” I asked. The thestral looked up from his drink, the black liquid dripping from his wickedly sharp teeth. “Do you know what lies beyond those hills?” I motioned towards the black shapes in the distance - the same ones that looked exactly the same size and distance as when I had first arrived here.

He stared off at them for a moment before returning to his drinking. “Beyond,” came the reply.

I’d never quite gotten used to Shades’ way of communicating. The words weren’t so much spoken as they were ‘thought’ at you, appearing centre stage in your brain. He’d have made a killing as a ventriloquist back in Manehattan, I chuckled to myself.

Shades looked up quizzically. “Fairlight?”

“Just ignore me, Shades,” I replied, stretching my forelegs. “I’m just having one of my moments. Anyway, we were talking about the place beyond the hills?”

“Beyond,” he hissed, nodding his head in affirmation.

Well that certainly helped clear things up didn’t it! Letting out a long sigh I stretched my hind legs out and occupied myself with examining the pendant. The light it gave was bright and clear - certainly a welcome purity in this drab land. In fact whichever way you looked at it, the Withers wasn’t the kind of place to appear on anyponies holiday destination plans, that was for certain. But if nothing else, I think that was what made the pendant’s light so special. It was a beacon of hope as much as it was a directional guide. The chain it hung from was beautifully made too, consisting of intricately fashioned, fine gold links. It was quite beautiful in its own way, and my only physical link to Meadow from what seemed like a lifetime ago. In some ways, I suppose it quite literally was.

Shades and I had been walking in silence for some time now, stopping only for a drink. Now sated, we were just starting out again when he stopped abruptly and stared intently into the far distance. He let out a low rumbling growl, his wings flexing.

“What is it?” I asked warily.

Without looking round, the thestral’s eyes flared like tiny suns, throwing his thoughts at me. “Run!”

I didn’t hesitate this time. Muscles flexing, adrenalin kicking into high gear, I took off into a gallop. Likewise, Shades leapt, his leathery wings hammering the still air as he gained height.

“Follow!” he shrieked into my head, and disappeared ahead of me until he was a faint speck in the distance.

“Not so fast!” I puffed back. Bloody hell fire, what had him so riled up? I trusted his instincts, sure. I mean, after all he was a native of this place, right? But still, it was ridiculously difficult to fathom what was going through the odd creatures head sometimes and this was most most definitely one of those times. Sand billowed up in black plumes around my hooves as I galloped on, wondering just what it was I actually running from. At least, that was until a spear whistled past my ear, nicking it on the way past before embedding itself in the ground. “Oh, shit!” I shouted to myself, increasing speed as another thudded into the sand only a few feet away. Dear gods, I know I’d been craving something to do other than all that endless walking, but this wasn’t what I had in mind! In fact, all I could do was keep running and hope to the heavens I’d outpace whatever, or whoever was throwing those damned spears at me.

The chase didn’t last long, and as odd as it may sound I couldn’t help but admire the cunning of my hunters, especially when the rope hidden in the black sand shot up and I ploughed into it full tilt. Sand exploded into the air as I crashed muzzle first into the ground before skidding unceremoniously to a coughing and sneezing halt. Some of the damned stuff had got in my eyes too, partially blinding me. Gathering my legs beneath me, I dragged myself to my hooves, just as one of the most bizarre voices I’d ever heard shrieked into my ears.

“Hold knave, in the name of the Queen, I command thee to hold !” The commanding voice boomed out with a most peculiar effect - my legs instantly buckled. For all I tried, I just couldn’t get the damned things to work! Whatever the voice’s origin was though, it had done its work well. Helplessly, I tried to focus on where it was coming from, only to be met with an array of spear points hovering mere inches from my sand grated muzzle. I sat there, locked in mute silence as the sound of crunching sand announced the arrival of something straight out of one of my old history books. Standing over me was an alicorn - a blindingly white pony resplendent in golden armour that had been burnished until it shone like Celestia’s sun. He was the most breathtakingly magnificent image of the knights of old, his sea green eyes boring into me as I lay helpless at his hooves.

“You are Fairlight of Equestria?” It was more an announcement than a question.

“Apparently,” I replied.

“You will follow us.” His tone brooked no dissent. Turning away with his two fellows, virtual clones of the one in charge, they were several paces away before they realised I hadn’t moved.

“You WILL follow us!” The first alicorn bellowed, pointing a forehoof at me.

I couldn’t help but feel compelled to move as he commanded, even though every part of me was screaming out to do the opposite. Meadow’s warning replayed in my mind. ‘They’ll be coming for you. They don’t like loose ends. I said I’d try to persuade you to surrender, but it’s not right. If they take you, they’ll strip your memories - your mind. Don’t let them!’ Strip my memories?

“To hell with that, and to hell with you!” I snarled, holding the crystal to my chest. I would be with Meadow again some day and no pony, or whatever this lot where supposed to be, would stand in my way.

“Art thou a fool mortal pony?” the alicorn snorted imperiously. “Thy mind must be befuddled to try to think in such a manner!” One of the glowing pony’s companions sidled up to him, speaking in a low voice. Whatever it was he said, the head of the not-so-merry band backed away, waving his compatriot towards me.

“Thalio is unused to speaking to ponies from the equestrian plane, mortal,” the new fellow announced. “I have agreed to speak in his stead.” Despite the different tone of voice, the unmistakable expectation of obedience was still there front and centre.

“I expect you have a name?” I asked calmly. “I do, it’s ‘Fairlight’, not ‘Mortal’. I think your pal ‘Thalio’ may have mentioned it?”

A look of surprise tinged with a distinct hint of anger flashed across the pony’s face. “I am Helios,” he said, adjusting his wings. “I collect lost souls and return them to the Eternal Herd. You, Fairlight, should have been collected long ago.” He snorted and shook his golden mane. “You have been particularly hard to track.”

“Yeah, well, no disrespect, Helios, but considering the current situation I’m in right now, I’m rather glad I have been,” I smiled cheekily. “Normally try to kebab ‘mortal ponies’ with spears rather than speak with them first, do you?”

The alicorn bobbed his head in irritation, his ears flicking as he looked towards his fellows then back to me. “We,” he began, “that is, the Eternal Herd, cannot have tainted souls wandering around lost in the Withers. It is wrong. You are wrong. Don’t you understand, Fairlight, we are trying to help you.”

“You’ve a funny way of showing it!” I snapped back at him, stomping my hoof. “You and you pals threw a bloody spear at me! Two of them!” This pony was really starting to get my back up.

Helios didn’t seem phased by my angry outburst in the slightest. “The spears were meant to slow you down,” he explained. “They would not have ‘killed’ you.” I didn’t like the way he emphasised the word ‘killed’ either. He continued, “You are harbouring a dangerous entity, Fairlight. We must exorcise it from your spirit so that you can move on from this place. Once that has been done you will be able to go home to your wife and daughter where you belong. Surely you must see how this is the only choice you have? It is the right choice.”

I wasn’t convinced. “And just how do you plan on exorcising this ‘entity’ from me then, eh?”

Helios shifted uncomfortably. It was barely a hairs breadth, but my keen eyes picked up on it straight away. “You will have your essence cleansed,” he said quietly. “It will be remade pure and clean, with the taint flushed from your soul. You will be reborn and ready to join us, Fairlight. You will be able to become one with your brothers and sisters in the herd, as the gods decreed.”

“By wiping my memories away?” I asked.

Helios closed his eyes and took a breath. “That is one of the effects I fear. The entity taints a pony’s very being: their memories, their personality, their magic, and everything about them that makes them unique. To purge it the only effective way is to cleanse the soul completely. Memories are a part of what makes a pony who they are, and therefore they are inextricably linked with the soul. Naturally, cleansing the essence - the soul - will unfortunately wipe all the individuals memories clean during the process.”

“Will they return?” I asked.

Helios paused, giving me a pained look. “No. At least, it is highly unlikely. Your case, Fairlight, is rare - very rare indeed. I cannot say what will happen, but we cannot leave you like this. The Queen herself has commanded we collect you.”

“The Queen?” I asked in surprise. “And if I refuse to follow you, what then?”

Helios’ expression hardened. “You do not refuse a request from Her Royal Highness, Fairlight. May as well refuse sunlight itself.”

“I see...” I smiled bitterly, feeling the hair tingle along my spine. “So basically it’s have my personality destroyed to live in you utopia, or have my botty spanked for upsetting her royal nibs, is it?” I felt a low growl growing in the back of my throat as I turned away, “Then you can keep you damned sunlight, Helios. I will live on in the night.”

“You cursed stubborn fool!” Helios shouted at me in a burst of sudden fury. “Nopony denies the Queen! No pony denies the herd! You are coming with us. NOW!”

“Go buck yourself,” I smiled, narrowing my eyes. For the briefest moment, Helios looked disconcerted. And that was all the opening I needed. I charged him, hooking a foreleg around his neck and pulled the long knife free from his scabbard. The blade glowed blue with crackles of lightning along the fuller, yet despite my surprise I kept a tight hold on the strange thing. I had never seen such a weapon, but now was not the time for marvelling at its design. In any case, whether I’d wanted it or not I had the alicorns full attention now. “We are going to take this nice and slow boys,” I said in my deepest authoritative voice. “Drop your weapons. All of you, if you please.” I couldn’t resist a suitably menacing grin to emphasise my words.

Briefly I wondered if the ponies would charge me regardless of the peril their comrade was in. They glared angrily at me, but thankfully and soundlessly complied, dropping their spears and swords onto the sand before them. “Now, nice and easy,” I said politely, “buck off the lot of you.”

“You do not command the Eternal Herd!” the one I knew as Thalio bellowed at me in indignation.

“Yeah?” I gave him my most derisive snort. “Well your friend here is going to gain some extra ventilation unless you two clear off and leave me be. Comprende?”

It was a bluff, and a poor one at that, but I hoped that the shock of being defied was something that these alicorns hadn’t expected and that it would be enough to gain some time for me to make my escape. The flaw with the plan was that as soon as my captive, Helios, was released, there was nothing to prevent them from returning and finishing what they’d started. The next time would no doubt involve a lot more spears too, and that, I thought to myself with a grimace, would certainly not end well for yours truly.

What came next surprised not only myself, but all the equines assembled.

In the struggle with Helios, the crystal pendant had dropped down across his neck. The tall creature’s eyes focussed on the glowing object and he cried out, waving a foreleg frantically. “Hold!” he shouted, “For the Goddesses’ sake, hold! Thalio, this one bears Starswirl’s Beacon!”

There was a long pause whilst everypony stared at the little white crystal at it hung there glowing silently. “It’s what?” I asked in surprise. “You’d better start making some sense here, friend.”

“How didst thou come by this, mortal?” Thalio rumbled stepping forward, all concern for his comrade forgotten in his fascination with my pendant.

“None of you concern friend,” I said in as neutral a tone as I could muster. I didn’t know what they were talking about, but whatever it was I wanted to keep things as violence free as possible.

Of the three alicorns, the one who had stood in silence all this time finally stepped forward. His voice was very different from the rest. It was calm, honest, yet carried a commanding tone that drew my attention like iron filings to a magnet. “Fairlight,” he intoned, “this changes things. Please, let my brother go. You have my word you will not be harmed nor forced to do anything your will.” The stallion walked forward, Thalio bowing to him as he did so. Aha! So this was the head boy pony here was it? I was beginning to wonder which one it was. “I am Artemis, Captain of the fifth cohort of the second legion, Wither world detachment,” the tall alicorn explained. There was no arrogance or expectation of obedience in this one. I could have almost taken a liking to him, if the situation we were in had been different.

“Fairlight, Captain of the Royal Equestrian Watch, Manehattan,” I replied in a no-nonsense voice, which oddly seemed to unsettle poor Thalio as he stood watching us. “Forgive me, Captain Artemis, I think you will appreciate that were the situation reversed, you would be unwilling to release your hostage until negotiations were complete. You do outnumber me three to one you know - not good odds in anyponies book.”

Artemis smiled and gave a short nod. “I understand Captain Fairlight.” He glanced towards Helios, “Keep still brother. This one appears to be a pony of his word, and a kindred officer of ponies. We will discuss this matter like stallions of honour.”

Oooh, what fine words! I thought to myself. I felt a little self conscious after that. After all, holding a hostage was not exactly what an officer of the watch should be doing. Right now however, needs must when the thestral drives. Metaphorically speaking.

“Fairlight,” Artemis began, “my brothers have already explained to you who we are, and what we have been tasked to do. We have little choice as, by royal decree, we must bring you in to the herd.” I shook my head, but Artemis went on. “By now you will know yourself that here in the Withers there is no beginning, and no end. It is an eternity of emptiness, of fading memories, madness, and only an infinity of sadness as you are slowly lost to the black sands. There is no life for ponies in this place of darkness, Fairlight. There is only death. We want to bring you home, to your wife and your foal. Many of your brothers and sisters are there from the watch already, and I know they will welcome you with love and kindness as all our children are.”

I stood transfixed. What the hell could I say to that? I dropped the blade and my forehooves flopped to my sides. My friends in the watch, my ponies who died on that terrible night... they were in the herd? They were waiting to be with me? By Luna’s radiant moon I wanted to be with them. I wanted to see them once again and beg their forgiveness for my failure to protect them. Sitting there on my haunches I hardly felt Helios scooch away from me. Artemis however, a pony of his word, stayed where he was.

“Your family are waiting for you, Fairlight,” Artemis said quietly. “I beg you; don’t let this terrible place take you.”

“What about Meadow?” I asked quietly.

“Who?” he asked, suddenly looking disconcerted.

“My Wife,” I told him, a tear trickling down my cheek. “If I go with you, will you not take my memories of her away from me?”

The reply was a honest as it gave me chills. “Yes.”

It felt like I had swallowed a leaden weight as the captain continued, “I cannot say whether you will eventually recall her or not once the exorcism has been completed, Fairlight. Truthfully, I would tell you if I knew.” Artemis looked down at his hooves, not wanting to meet my eyes. “I’m sorry, there’s no other way.”

I gave him the only reply I could. “Then the answer, Captain Artemis, is no.” Meadow was all that kept me sane in this dire land of black sand, and whatever it took, I would find my way back. I would follow her crystal’s light. If it took me an eternity...

Rubbing his neck, Helios stood up and shook his mane, pushing a few loose hairs back into place. “We’ve tried reasoning with you, Fairlight, but you just don’t seem to want to listen to reason.” And ‘reason’, according to this guy, included chucking spears at ponies. He continued, “Should you stay here as you are determined to do, you will eventually fade away until there will be nothing for us to save. It will be too late for you. As Artemis has said, nothing can live in Wither World”.

“And thestrals?” I said, wondering where the elusive creature had vanished to.

“What about them?” Helios asked.

I raised an eyebrow quizzically. “You said ‘nothing can live in the Wither world’. They do. So your assertion that I cannot survive here, is wrong.”

Artemis huffed. “Thestrals are not truly alive as you know it, Captain. They are creatures that live ‘between’. Some were once living ponies like you and me. Some of them… once.” His eyes took on a distant look as silence fell.

“What of this pendant then?” I queried, holding up the glowing crystal, “You said it was ‘Starswirl’s Beacon’?”

“Don’t-”, Helios began, but Artemis stopped him with a hoof on his shoulder.

“No brother,” the tall alicorn said gently. “I can tell him.” He looked me square in the eyes. “You know who ‘Starswirl the bearded’ is of course?” he asked me. I nodded. “When he still lived, the wizard would travel the planes between life and death, a walker of dreams and a seeker of the deeper knowledge.”

“And he developed this crystal as a way to find his way home?” I ventured, marvelling at the tiny creation.

“Yes and no.” Artemis shook his head. “He used it to navigate the worlds, true, but the crystal itself was a gift. Starswirl had found a way to enter the plane of the Eternal Herd, something no living mortal pony had ever accomplished before...” He scratched his ear with a fore hoof and sighed. “The gift was from a member of the-”

“For the goddesses sake brother, hold thy tongue!” Thalio shouted. “Thy head will roll, Artemis!”

Artemis lowered his head in resignation, “You’re right brother, it is not my place to tell. Forgive me, Captain Fairlight. I would tell you if I could. Suffice to say that the crystal you wear around your neck lights the way to the veil.”

“The veil?” I asked, intrigued. At least I had a name for my destination, and that in itself sparked a light of hope in my heart.

“Yes,” Artemis replied. “It is the place where the division between the Wither World, the mortal and immortal realms are at their thinnest. Though know this - the veil can only be crossed by one with enormous magical power. A power both of the mortal world and of this world. Raw magic.”

My heart sank. Raw magic? Was he kidding? I’d heard of it of course, I mean, who hadn’t heard of it? It was the magic the gods had used to create the world and allegedly there were pockets of it still around in the deepest places of Equestria, but here? And even if I found one, I was only a unicorn with about as much magical aptitude as a common conjuror. Oh goddesses, I couldn’t sink into despair now... Racking my mind, a question came to the fore, “That being the case Artemis, how did Starswirl manage to cross in both directions? He was a mortal pony after all, and hardly wielded the magic of the gods.”

“Yes… yes he was.” Artemis nodded sagely. “But Starswirl had tapped into magics unheard of – Raw, primal powers which few save the King and Queen had ever known. Do you have that power Fairlight? That depth of knowledge?” Artemis fixed me with a searching look. I think he actually expected me to say “Yes”.

“No. No, I don’t,” I said dejectedly.

“Then come with us, brother,” the alicorn offered. “I will take you to Meadow. Even if your memories are gone you can start afresh with the love of your friends and family around you. You can begin again, as you were meant to be.”

My heart ached. I threw my head back and took in a deep breath fighting back the tears. Damn you, Artemis! He knew just where to strike a pony. Shaking my mane, I held my resolve tightly. I would end this. End it the way Meadow wanted me to.

“Forgive me, Captain,” I said politely but firmly. “As you have your mission, I too have mine. Be it a fools errand to which no good will come of it or not, I will follow my orders.”

To my amazement, Artemis actually looked impressed and smiled appreciatively. “Your Wife’s orders by any chance?” he chuckled.

“My Wife’s orders,” I confirmed with a broad grin. The two of us broke out in laughter and I felt my heart lift, re-invigorating me with a renewed energy I’d thought long gone.

“Captain Fairlight of the Equestrian Watch. My brother stallion,” Artemis announced, standing straight and tall. “I commend you sir for your integrity and honesty. Gentlecolts…” Helios and Thalio walked up to stand either side of him. “Goddess speed you on your journey, sir. I pray you complete your mission and return to us one day, victorious.” Two of them, with the exception of Thalio, snapped off an impressive salute which I returned smartly.

With a nod, Helios unbuckled the baldric for the knife I had taken from him and tossed it towards me. “Keep the blade, Captain. You will need it more than I. May it serve you well.” He raised an eyebrow with a wry smile, “I’m just glad you didn’t try it out on me!” I blushed in response, scratching my ear in embarrassment.

A white glow of almost blinding white light appeared behind them, seemingly out of nowhere. And then, as one, they turned and walked away until they were enveloped in the brightness. “Farewell, Captain,” Artemis called out. The three figures grew smaller and more distant as the glow began to fade, a faint voice calling back, barely audible now. “See you again soon, my brother.”

Soundless darkness re-asserted its dominance and I blinked my eyes to re-adjust. I had a renewed sense of purpose, a cool looking knife from the eternal herd, an ancient relic from an equestrian hero and a sturdy set of hooves. What more could a pony ask? With a loud neigh and swish of my tail, I span to aim myself in the direction the crystal’s glow indicated. “Starswirl you old bugger, I could kiss you,” I laughed aloud to the silent land surrounding me. I settled for a light kiss on the crystal instead. Gods, how I wanted to shout a war cry, to howl my defiance to the universe. It would have to be something unique and challenging, full of mystique and portent…

“BOLLOCKS!” I bellowed, and with a wild laugh I galloped off as fast my regular old pony legs could take me.

********************

I galloped until my poor hooves felt like they would drop off at any moment. Although I had a great deal of endurance here in the Withers it, was certainly not without limits and I had all but reached mine for the day. Not that I could tell what time it was here of course, but tired was tired regardless of whether it was morning, midday or evening. In any case I had to try my best to get some well earned sleep and recharge the old Fairlight batteries. Carefully, I reached towards the unnaturally cold ball of power within me and released a little of its magic. It was just the barest of caresses, but it was all it took. I’d been experimenting with my new found and decidedly peculiar abilities since I had ‘arrived’ here, discovering to my relief that some were almost controllable. Actually, ‘controllable’ might not be the most accurate way to describe this. It was little like wrestling with a cobra, bare hoofed and trying to bend it to your will, all the while hoping to avoid the thing sinking its fangs into you. In fairness though, I don’t think I’d fully appreciated the gravity of what was really going on. Apparently I’d died, but was not ‘quite’ dead. My spirit, essence, or soul, or whatever the bloody hell it was supposed to be, was tainted so I couldn’t go to the herd anyway, so… I closed my eyes and scrubbed my forelock in frustration. What the hell did it all mean, anyway? I couldn’t do sod all about it other than grasp at the sliver of hope Meadow had given me in the form of the tiny crystal. Funny how it had belonged to Starswirl though, and from what those alicorns had been fussing about, it seemed it had been a gift from a benefactor whom they weren’t supposed to mention. All very intriguing of course, but meant absolutely bot-all to me right now. Stupid bloody herd with their wings and horns and posh, shiny coats. What the hell was wrong with mine? Grey was good. It was a nice, neutral colour that went well with most things. Gods, I could murder a cup of tea right now...

I drew in a deep breath, the warm air mingling with the ice cold from deep inside my chest. With a long exhale that far exceeded my actual lung capacity, I breathed out a thick swirling blue fog that hung in the air. Next I turned full circle, surrounding myself with the deadly miasma. In its own eerie way it was really quite beautiful, glittering and sparkling like a cloud of countless stars. I could have taken a job on the stage with this as a special effects pony with this trick. I’d used it the first time completely by accident, frighteningly during my sleep shortly after meeting Shades. Thank the goddess that the friendly creature hadn’t been affected by the lethal fog, but how I had no idea. Upon waking up that ‘morning’, I’d found the frozen remains of what I can only describe as ‘things’ which had wandered into its deadly grasp. ‘Things’ I might add that I certainly wouldn’t have wanted finding me defenceless when I was asleep. There’d been far too many tentacles and teeth for my liking. And so I settled down, shifting my weight to even out the sand beneath me to something approaching a bed. Oh Luna! What I wouldn’t give for a bed right now. I yawned, letting my mind drift away on a unsettle raft on a sea of doubt. Perhaps one day I’d get a decent night sleep here. But this… this would do for now...

Dreams took me into the warm embrace and drifted, floating away on sea of happy memories.

Meadow had taken the news of my suspension well. Surprisingly well considering our plans to have a foal had just come to a crashing halt. My wages were still being paid for now, but the outcome of the investigation was still in doubt. Meadow was confident I would be exonerated of course, but if the way the Chief had torn a strip off me in his office that day was any judge, I just didn’t know. As days turned to weeks the strain began to tell on our relationship as I found the boredom of being out of work intolerable. My grandfather used to tell me, “Idle hooves are Discord’s playground.” And he wasn’t wrong.

“Morning love,” Meadow called to me as she prepared breakfast. I mumbled a reply whilst concentrating for umpteenth time on the Manehattan Enquirer vacancies page. Every day it was the same. Every sodding day! ‘Look for a job in case the worst happens,’ she’d said. ‘Hope for the best but prepare for the worst,’ and so on and blood so on. Gods, whose side was she on?! One minute she’s all full of confidence and the next it’s like I’m a condemned stallion! She popped her head round the door. “Morning love,” she said again.

“Morning,” I replied far too loudly.

Meadow clucked her tongue at me and vanished back into the kitchen before re-appearing a few minutes later with a light breakfast of orange juice and mixed veg. A bowl of toasted oats added a tasty crunch to the ensemble which I ate in gloomy silence, reading through the sparse list of crappy low paid jobs that were on offer.

Meadow sat down at the other end of the table and took a sip of her juice. “Anything?”

“Nothing,” I huffed irritably, scrunching up the paper. “Not a goddess bucking thing.”

Meadow grimaced at my crude choice of words. “Don’t swear Fairlight, you know I don’t like that.”

“What’s it matter?” I replied bitterly. “I’m a failure anyway. I may as well act like one.”

“You’re not a failure and you know it.” Meadow looked up at me from her glass of orange. “You’re only suspended remember, not sacked.”

“I may as well be!” I shouted, throwing the paper across the room. “I ‘screwed up’ remember? I killed my friends. I left them to die! Goddess forgive me, Meadow, I should have died there with them. I shouldn’t be here now! It’s wrong. All of it’s so wrong…”

The green mare reached over to me and put her hoof on mine. “Stop this Fairlight, please! You’re torturing yourself with what happened. You did what you could, and Mitre knows that. I know you did your best.”

Cruelly, I smacked her hoof away, “My best?! My ‘best’ wasn’t good enough! I’m a disgrace to the watch, Meadow. Pop would be spinning in his grave.”

Meadow hugged the hoof I’d knocked away, wincing, “Your father wouldn’t have wallowed in self pity, Fairlight. This isn’t you. This isn’t the Fairlight I married. You need help to get you through this, so I’ve had a word with Dr Spindle. He wants to help you, love.”

“You’ve done what?!” I yelled, jumping to my hooves.

A pair of sad yellow eyes stared back at me. “Please, Fairlight, you need help. Look at yourself! You’re not you anymore. We can’t keep going on like this!”

My chest was heaving with my untethered emotions. I was furious: with the damned commissioner, the watch, Equestria, but most of all - myself. I had shouted and roared at the only pony who I had ever loved, the one who gave me support unconditionally and, Celestia forgive me, I had hurt her. I looked at those beautiful eyes as they began to well with tears, yet maintained a determined look despite the despair and anguish she was feeling. I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t bear the self loathing I felt for myself, nor witness the misery I was inflicting on such an innocent soul.

“I’m going out,” I announced, and snatched my coat and hat from the hat stand. For a moment the coat caught on the stand and I pulled at it in fury, ripping the sleeve slightly and sending the stand crashing down the hallway. Like a defiant foal who’d been told he couldn’t have the sweets he wanted, I kicked it petulantly, slamming the door behind me as I left.

Meadow… said nothing.

A strong wind was blowing outside and the endless Manehattan rain was driving down in earnest. Celestia, don’t they pay for weather ponies here? I’d sack the damned lot of them if I had my way, the useless bucking idiots. Now I had to contend with a foul mood, and even fouler weather on my way to only gods knew where. I used my magic to pull my hat down and pulled up my collar to try and keep the worst of it out. The paper stall was nearby, and a hot cup of tea and something sweet might go some way to improving my- Oh, I don’t bucking believe it! Shut! Goddess damned typical! Everything was turning to dung around me - a now tangible reflection of hopelessness of my situation. I kicked the paper stand’s shutter and walked on until I reached the ‘don’t walk’ sign. Red. Stop. Dear Luna, what a bucking mess…

I barely heard the carriage rumbling up the cobbled street and pull up beside me. The door opened and a trench coated blue stallion held out something that I needed more now than ever - a cigarette. “I think you need this,” the chief said in his usual gruff voice. “Get in”. Woodenly I climbed into the cool yet mercifully dry interior of the modest conveyance. Mitre leaned forward and slid the driver’s hatch open, “Fumbles, let’s roll.” The carriage lurched forward and we sped off down the dank Manehattan streets. “There’s somepony I want you to meet.”

I sat in silence, taking a deep draw on the sweet tobacco. I’d given these things up years ago, but today... today I needed this. I’m sorry, Meadow.

“Shelly says these’ll kill me some day,” Chief Mitre said as I lit his cigar for him. “But you’ve got to go of something, I always say. None of us know what’s around the next corner.”

I sure as hell hadn’t. My team had paid the price for that failure too. Suddenly a hoof smacked me across the jaw, “And you can pack that in right now, Captain. I’m not in the mood for bullshit today and I need my officer back. Clear?” Mitre’s eyes bored into mine.

I nursed my jaw with a hoof, checking it was still attached. The old bugger had nearly taken it off! “Yes, sir,” I said woodenly. No trip to the dentist required this time, thank Celestia.

“Let me ask you something Fairlight,” the chief began. “Doesn’t anything strike you as odd about that night in the warehouse?”

Other than everypony I knew being butchered? Damn it all I felt like screaming at the stallion, but I knew Mitre well enough to know he was referring to something other than the obvious. Still, there was a protocol to follow. “Chief, I’m suspended,” I explained. “I’m not supposed to be talking with any of the watch until the investigation is-”

A heavy hoof on the end of a blue foreleg smashed past my ear into the carriage’s wall, sending splinters flying everywhere. “I don’t give a buck about any ‘investigation’, Captain! Now, are you going to give me my officer back or am I going to have to throw you out into the street to wallow in you own self pity?”

The driver’s hatch opened and a voice came back, “Everything all right back there boss?”

“Aye,” the Chief replied simply. “Having a little language difficulty, that’s all. I think we’re beginning to understand each other now though.” He looked me right in the eyes. “Aren’t we?”

“Yes, sir!” I said smartly, feeling to my surprise a little of the ‘old’ me returning. I noted the muted chuckle from the driver as he slid the hatch closed.

“Now then, Captain, I’ve read your report,” Mitre began. “Several times actually. Some of it simply doesn’t add up though, no matter how many times I read it. I need your help to connect the dots and fill in the gaps.”

“Sir,” I replied.

The chief produced a notebook and pen. “You deployed the flash bugs?”

I nodded. “They worked as planned.”

“Their effect on the targets?”

I paused, my mind racing back to that terrible night.

“Captain?” Mitre asked, putting his pad down to look at me.

“None,” I confirmed quietly.

“Any idea why?”

“Sorry Chief, I don’t.” I took a breath and swallowed. “I’ve replayed the night’s events over and over a thousand times in my head. I can only suspect that...”

“They had anticipated it?” the Chief cut in.

I nodded. “Yes, sir”.

Mitre reached into a brown case, taking out an evidence envelope. “Here, what do you make of these?”

Inside was a concave, oval glass dish. It was incredibly thin, but with a surprising amount of flexibility too. I held it up to the window of the cab with my magic and watched in amazement as it darkened. When I moved it back again, the glass became clear once more. “Is this magical? I haven’t seen anything like it. What’s it for?” As the words left my lips, I suddenly realised what it was that was niggling at the back of my mind. Chief Mitre smiled wryly and nodded. “Goddesses,” I breathed. “I understand now. It’s not equestrian made is it?”

“No, Captain,” Mitre solemnly replied. “Look at the other item.”

The next object to emerge was a hard cased black box with wires protruding from it. By the general shape it was obvious it was designed to go in your ear, with a curving strap holding it in place over the head. A long bendable rod with a finely textured end piece followed the contours of the wearer’s chin, terminating where their mouth would be.

“This is from the same place,” I pondered. “It’s like our TED’s, but a different type of magic.” Normally my horn itched near significant magical fields or artefacts. In this case, it was as dead as a door nail. “If magic at all?”

Mitre took the items back, placing them back into the folder. “It’s not equestrian, and not magic. At least, not as you and I know it,” he said cryptically. He made a note in his pad and glanced out of the window before continuing. “What’s your take on the snipers?”

I sighed., I’d been dreading this. The dead staring eyes of those ponies were burned into my memory and kept me awake long into the night. Maybe talking about it would help, but I doubted it.

“They were dead when I got there Chief. Single shot to the back of the head. No sign of any weapon nearby.”

“Location of the bodies?” he asked.

“One on the balcony, two in the office.”

“The doors?”

“The one to the gantry was padlocked from the inside. The other was unlocked.”

The chief flipped a page in his note pad. “The pre-action report from the recon team specifically notes that the padlock on the inner office door was missing when they arrived. They were the last to leave the warehouse before your teams arrived. So far as we know.”

“The padlock was there, Chief,” I reiterated.

Mitre closed his eyes and nodded, “I know, Captain. It was still there when the forensic ponies arrived. After the army had trampled over all the evidence that is.” He let out a puff of smoke from his cigar, twirling it in his hoof. “Assessment?”

“Somepony knew we were coming,” I suggested, hating my own words. “They were too well prepared. Those light reactive eye covers and fancy TED’s could have been coincidental, brought as a precautionary measure, but the snipers? Somepony took them out quietly from behind with one of those other-world weapons and then locked the door from the inside. My guess is the bucker on the landing outside.”

“We recovered her body before the army arrived,” Mitre explained blowing a smoke ring. He wound the window down to let some of the thick grey cloud out. “We can thank Blaze’s team for that.”

“Sir? About Dawn, Dawn Rush. She tried to warn us just before all hell broke loose. I haven’t had a chance to speak to any of her flight, but Blaze told me that she… she hadn’t made it.”

The Chief reached across and put a comforting hoof on my foreleg. “She didn’t suffer, Captain. But yes, her flight was ambushed. That tube like contraption you mentioned in your report? There was another on the barge, concealed, and a lot larger.”

“Celestia’s backside!” I exclaimed, “We did recover it though, didn’t we?” We had to have had at least one break in this blasted case, and the barge must have held a treasure trove of clues that would be able to help us get to bottom of this whole fiasco. Unfortunately for the watch however, the reality of what happened after our ignominious rout made my blood run cold.

“No,” Mitre said gravely. “The agency cleared it out.”

“What?!” I nearly shouted. “The whole barge?”

“Aye.” The big blue stallion tapped his note pad. “The agency goon squad came in with their army pals and seized the lot. Everything except what you’ve seen in the file here.”

Luna buck me in a blind alley! “Chief, what the hell is going on here? The agency suits grabbed me after I left your office. After you-”

Mitre sighed and tapped the ash from his cigar out the window of the speeding carriage. “I know, they came and took the weapon you recovered too. What they don’t know is that we’ve been tinkering with some toys of our own. Here...” He passed me another folder from his case containing a selection of photographs, a number of diagrams with detailed pictures, dimensions, and operating instructions for one of the tube-like devices. Notably, somepony had also included a list of recommendations on adaptations and possible improvements that could be made. I was impressed; the forensic ponies must have worked round the clock to compile so thorough a study of the otherworldly weapons.

“This may interest you too. The mare on the gantry?” Mitre asked. I nodded as he continued, “We had Speak Easy’s boys look her over.”

The mental image of Speak Easy pawing over the body of the mare I’d killed was not one I’d like to dwell on. But here was the report, autopsy pictures and all. I suppressed my emotions and read the horrifyingly detailed description of the dissection of a once living creature. Keeping my stomach from emptying itself I turned to the last page and read the coroners conclusions, circled in red by, I suspected, the Chief.

Conclusions

Name : Unknown

Age : Indeterminate

Gender : Female

Race : Non-Equestrian

Type : Earth Pony Appearance

‘Non-Equestrian’, was hi-lighted and underlined several times. I flicked back through the descriptions of organs, blood type, colouring, even the condition of her teeth. “Goddesses, Chief,” I breathed. “Who, or rather ‘what’ was she?”

Chief Mitre fixed me with a level stare, “None of this leaves this carriage, Fairlight, do you understand?”

“Yes, sir,” I nodded.

“Good. And don’t worry about Fumbles, he’s one of us.” The chief waved a hoof towards the driver’s hatch. He took a deep breath and sighed it out, looking me in the eyes as he spoke. “This goes deep, Fairlight. Really deep. The portals we’ve found so far have always been inactive when we’ve managed to grab one. Apparently the magic that makes them work responds to various factors we haven’t been able to fathom yet, but we’ve got our best ponies on the job as we speak.” He took a draw on his cigar. “There’s a smuggling operation bringing items in from non-equestrian sources. We’ve known about that for some time, and your teams have shut down a good number of them. B what happened at the warehouse this takes the game to a whole new level. These… ‘things’,” he said tapping a hoof on the photo of the strange weaponry, “ups the ante. Whoever is behind this has been bringing in off-world weapons that were never designed for pony use.”

Hang on a minute, I thought, ‘off world’? Surely they could have been made by other races here in our world, such as, say, those ever crafty griffins for one. But the more I thought about it, the more fantastical it all became. I didn’t want to start thinking about little green ponies in space suits as well! “But the ones I saw were used by ponies, Chief, and all too effectively at that,” I reasoned.

Chief Mitre nodded, “Initially some had been brought here ready converted. We suspected they were a sort of ‘test batch’ to sweeten the deal. Since then they’ve been brought over in ever greater numbers, and the majority we’ve found have been re-engineered after they’ve arrived in Equestria to fit our physiology.”

I leaned back in my seat. This was so much to take in my mind felt like it was going to explode. He’d seen some before?

“Fairlight? The commissioner wanted you off the case - suspended pending a ‘full investigation’. In my opinion the whole thing’s going to be buried and forgotten. I was instructed to throw the book at you, so you’d take the fall.” Mitre took a draw on his cigar and leaned towards me. “Listen, there’s a reason I let fly at you the way I did that day. You probably aren’t aware of it, but my office has been bugged.”

“WHAT?! Gods almighty!” I shouted in surprise.

Mitre shrugged, “I had Speak Easy run a MET on it, and guess where it ended up?” An M.E.T or ‘Magical Energy Trace’ was a method employed by unicorns highly skilled in covert ops to match magical energy signatures to their owners. A sort of unique magic hoof-print finder. Just how bad had things become for the chief to resort to using one in his own office? Unfortunately, I knew the answer already:

“The commissioners office,” I said flatly.

“Good boy,” Mitre smiled. “I haven’t got anything concrete, but I think she has something to do with this and is trying to bury the evidence. How the agency fit into it exactly, I don’t know. Yet. This ‘non-equestrian’ mare though is another piece of the puzzle, but we’ll get to the bottom of it sooner or later. And to do that we need every pony we can get our hooves on.”

I felt the carriage beginning to slow. “But sir, I’m off the force now so what good is telling me any of this? And if the commissioner is gunning for me too, I won’t stand a chance of doing any detective work. She’d have me locked up and the key chucked in the bay.”

He smiled knowingly and hoofed me an umbrella, “That’s where you’re wrong, Captain. Ah, we’re here.” The carriage stopped with a slight lurch and Fumbles opened the door, rain blowing into the interior. “Come on my young friend,” Mitre smiled patting my knee. “Let’s give our comrades a good send off, eh?”

I stepped out of the carriage, magicking the umbrella open as I did so. The rows of open graves, coffins, and grieving families beckoned. The Equestrian Watch’s flag flapped wetly in the downpour at half mast, bearing witness to the tragedy below. This was my final duty to them as their officer, and as their captain. It was time to say goodbye to my friends.

That evening I staggered home after far too many wheat beers. I didn’t drink normally, or smoke for that matter, but the send off for our comrades had been a grand affair and I had indulged myself fully. The watch had really pushed the boat out on the wake, and well it should have. Equestrians mourn their dead at the funeral, but celebrate their lives afterwards, turning tears into smiles. At least, that was the theory. I was so inebriated I didn’t much care one way or the other. And so, in a fuse of drunken logic, I had turned down the offer of a taxi and tried to find my own way home, which, thank Luna, I actually managed to achieve. How exactly, I can’t remember for the life of me. All I recall is falling headlong into the porch and fumbling for my front door key. Damn it, the Celestia cursed thing was here somewhere. I could feel it in my pocket but for some bizarre reason my alcohol soaked brain couldn’t seem to co-ordinate my hooves to get the bloody thing out. Just to add insult to injury, my magic only made matters worse and I ended up with my coat stuck half over my head.

My pitiful cries for help were answered by a mare opening the door and announcing in a flat tone, “You’re home.”

“Oh thank Luna, I’m stuck. Meadow, help me get my coat off, love.” There was no reply. Hell, she was probably still mad at me. I’d have to make it up to her in the morning. Right now though I’d have-

I coughed.

“Oh goddesses, I think… I think I’m going to be… Meadow, I…” I belched loudly, following it up rapidly with the contents of my stomach. “Eurgh! Help! Meadow… Meadow, I can’t breath in here! Oh Luna, some went up my nose. Urrrgh!” My stomach retched over and over again, vomit filling my mouth, nose and eyes. I was trapped in a hot and slimy prison of cloth and puke, my hind legs sliding helpless on the tiled porch floor. “Meadow! I-” She roughly shoved me back out with both forelegs and, with a bang, the front door slammed shut. I heard the bolts slide into place and the click of the light.

“MEADOW!” I shouted, coughing on my sick. Oh goddesses, was that carrot in there? Damn it all, oh… Oh bollocks! “Urrrrggh!” I was burning hot, covered in sick and the world was spinning around me. Suddenly there was a horrible feeling of falling and a heavy crack as my head hit the inner porch wall on the way down. Considering how I must have looked and smelt, I was rather glad of the unconsciousness that followed.

I awoke to the beautiful melody of songbirds singing outside the bedroom window - the bloody noisy things. Goddesses in their bloody heaven, how was it possible to feel this bad and still be breathing? Everything hurt: my head, my eyes, even my ears of all things. I turned over to find Meadow wasn’t there, the space she normally occupied – cold. I wasn’t surprised. Smacking my lips I looked around for a glass of water, which incredibly sat there on the bedside table. I took a long draught gratefully, but even that relatively gentle movement had my head pounding like a bass drum. Still, I couldn’t wallow in my pit all day no matter how much I would have liked to. And so, with a long low groan of self pity, I rolled out of my soft comfy bed and headed for the shower, my poor legs nearly giving way as the room lurched worryingly around me. At least I didn’t feel sick any more, thank Celestia, and if there was one thing to be said about our modest home, it was that the bathroom was right next to the bedroom so I didn’t have far to stagger in case I was. Carefully climbing into the shower, the warm water was sheer bliss on my coat, freshening me up and soaking new life into my tired bones and muscles. Somepony, Meadow obviously, must have cleaned me up last night before putting me to bed. Hadn’t she? Hang on… I thought I’d been locked in the porch! Oh, bollocks, I was in so much trouble. Where in Equestria had she gotten to anyway? I hadn’t seen hide nor hair of her since I’d woken up. Mind you, seeing her in this condition wasn’t exactly the best start to the day, so I decided to make myself as presentable as possible before any concerted attempt at a grovelling apology. I finished showering and towelled off, dried out the old ears, a quick flank floss, and I was good to go. On my way to the dining room I noticed that my rain coat and hat were missing from the stand. No surprise there I suppose. I’d probably have to buy new ones after last night’s escapade. It was a damned shame too; they’d been my constant companions on many a shift in the watch, but nothing lasts forever. Especially when plastered with your stomach contents. Bugger it all…

I searched the house, but of my long suffering wife there was no sign. Her nurses uniform was still hanging in the wardrobe but her hat and scarf were gone. Perhaps she’d gone shopping and left a note for me? I checked the fridge door and the coffee table, the usual places for any household missives, but no sign of any note. Marvellous. Defeatedly I sat down, nursing my poor battered head with my hooves. Damn you alcohol! Unfortunately my appalling behaviour in the porch was starting to come back to me bit by bit, adding an extra dose of misery to my already delicate condition. Worse still, my behaviour towards Meadow earlier the previous evening began replaying though my mind as well, adding even more to the agony of the hangover.

Oh Luna, Celestia, what had I done?

My mind made up, I took my old watch-coat out of the cloakroom, knocked back a couple of candied pain killers, and headed out the front door to find my wife. A walk in the fresh air would help my head, and the quicker I found Meadow the better. Leaving things like this wasn’t good for either of us. Nor my sense of burgeoning guilt either. It was cool out, with a crisp breeze that was quite brisk for the time of year. In fact if I hadn’t have been feeling so tender I would have walked all the way to the first place on my list of places to try, but the nearby taxi rank was too much of a temptation to pass up, and in short order I was whisked across the city to Meadow’s place of work.

Manehattan General Hospital was a huge white complex of purpose made buildings, with each wing capable of housing hundreds, if not thousands of ponies. Everything from sore fetlocks and mane loss to laminitis was treated here. All quite common knowledge of course, but what a lot of the city dwellers didn’t know however, was that a lot of watch ponies had been treated here recently in utmost secrecy. And for reasons a lot more serious than mange or a jiffy tummy. Some of them would never be able to return to work due to the seriousness of their injuries, whilst others… others would not live to see another sunrise. I hung my head at the memory of my lost comrades, and with heavy hooves climbed the steps to reception.

A yellow earth pony nurse with a white feather cutie mark trotted up to me. “Hi Fairlight! How ya doing? No Meadow?” Quill looked past me to the door, obviously expecting her friend to be nearby.

“Hi, Quill,” I said solemnly. “I don’t know where she is. I thought she might be here.”

She nodded sagely. “Ah. You two had a fight?”

“Yeah, something like that,” I replied.

Quill nodded, her eyes closed as a knowing smile appeared on her face, “Drinking was it? Came home plastered and she was angry, right? Woke up and she’s disappeared. Am I in the right ball park?”

“How did you-?!” I exclaimed as Quill laughed and clopped her fore hooves together.

“Oh, I knew it!” she squealed, “My tail was twitching when you plodded in, and I just knew!”

“Plodded in?” I muttered.

“Oh, yes! Twitchy tail, itchy nose - they always tell me when something’s going to happen! Or in your case, already has happened! Or is that ear flopping? Hmm...”

Celestia, my head! Gods above, I didn’t have time for this. And now Quill’s inexhaustible energy was starting to make my headache worse that it was when I woke up! If that was even possible.

“Quill...” I began.

“Hmm?” she replied, blinking up at me.

I closed my eyes and sighed. “I think you ought to see a doctor.”

********************

Back outside the ground was still damp from the previous night’s rain as I approached the Manehattan municipal graveyard. Even when it wasn’t raining the place had a dark and oppressive feel to it, and it certainly wasn’t the kind of place I would want to come given any choice. My heart felt leaden in my chest and I was uncertain as to what I would find in this place. “Other than dead ponies,” I sighed quietly under my breath. The stone stairs from this side of the site were large and shallow, designed to help ponies who were young, old, or perhaps simply infirm to reach the level ground at the summit. A respectably healthy climb later, and I was there. The flag had been taken down since I’d last been here, but the clearly new graves and colourful flowers stood out in stark relief from the rest of the drab stone. The ponies of the watch had clubbed together to top up the funeral fund for a little something more than the usual square slab which indicated the final resting place of the fallen. I walked slowly past each one, noting the name and examining the faces of each pony that had been engraved into the surface beside the inlaid gold lettering. Luna forgive us, there were so many…

I’d seen them lowered beneath the earth only the day before, but in the shock of the chief’s revelations and the incessant freezing rain, it had all seem unreal somehow. Now, here was the starkness of reality before me. No more games, no more laughter - this was how it all ended. They were gone. I gently stroked a hoof along the top of each grave stone, looking for the one I knew would be there.

Dawn Rush.

Her grave stone was no different from the rest of those belonging to the fallen of the watch. From what I knew of the chirpy pegasus, she wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. Her picture however, rather than the standard ID types of the rest, was a cheekily smiling Dawn, winking at the camera. I couldn’t help but smile, a light chuckle in my throat escaping despite my sadness. “Dawn…” I whispered, closing my eyes. After a deep breath, I read the inscription:

Watch Lieutenant Dawn Rush

Beloved daughter of Lilly and Carrot

Hero of the Manehattan Watch Flying Squad

Fly proud, Fly true

“Hero of the Manehattan Watch,” I read aloud. “You were that and more Lieutenant.” I sat back on my haunches, wiping a rogue tear away. “No tears for you, eh? You’d buck me into next week!” I looked up into the sky, breathing out slowly. She’d tried to save us that night. Save all of us. A ‘hero of the watch’, indeed. “You better be taking good care of her up there y’here?” I called up to the heavens, “or I’ll kick your arses into next Thursday!” I laughed and stood back up, brushing the mud off my coat. Dawn hated mucky uniforms. I was so lost in my reminiscing I barely registered the crunching of hoofsteps on the gravel path beside me.

“Capn’? That you?”

Now that voice brought back memories. “Blaze,” I said turning to look at the sleek pegasus mare standing there in her smart blue watch cloak. The pale grey pony shook her rust coloured mane and turned her gaze towards the grave marker. “Thanks for coming to see her, sir. She’d have wanted you to, you know.”

I was lost for words. Blaze and Dawn were... well, there was no other way to say it - they were lovers. ‘Officially’ it was supposed to be a secret of course, but a badly kept one that absolutely everypony in the Manehattan Watch knew about. Watch regulations stated emphatically, ‘No fraternisation between watch ponies’ and, yeah, we took that as an advisory rather than actual ‘rules’. Besides, they were two of the best liked ponies in the watch, and their little flirtations between each other would bring good natured lectures from the chief if he ever caught them. We all knew them, and we all loved them. Our sisters in the watch. Now, there was only one.

“I couldn’t protect her, Blaze.” I said finally managed. I was barely able to meet the gaze of her big silver eyes. “She tried to save us. I’m... sorry. I’m so sorry.” I hung my head, unsure as to what else to say. And what could I say, anyway? Nothing I said could mend a broken heart or bring back a lost loved one.

Blaze said nothing for a few moments. She just stood there, staring at me in silence. I could feel her eyes boring into me, searching my soul, but for what exactly I didn’t know. Answers to what had happened? Why her lover had been taken from her? I half expected her to buck me full in the face, and I wouldn’t have blamed her if she did. I stood, waiting for the blow that never came.

“Do you know how she died?” Blaze asked suddenly, turning back to the grave.

I looked up, blinking. “No.” I took a deep breath before continuing, “The chief told me she didn’t suffer though. Blaze, it’s not a good idea to-”

“-She flew in front of me,” Blaze interrupted suddenly. “My Dawn flew in front of those bloody damned fire bug things and… and…” She choked back a sob. “She took a full blast in the chest. I caught her as she fell, but there was nothing I could do. Dawn was… she was already gone. The bastards damned near cut her in half. I can’t get the sight of her blood out of my mind, Cap, it was… Do you know what that’s like? Those bastards took the one reason I had for living and destroyed it. They stole my Dawn and…” I went to put a foreleg around Blaze but she backed away shaking her head, “Capn’ I… I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye!” Tears were falling from her eyes like rain as she stared right at me. “They took her from me!”

I closed my eyes for a moment before speaking. “Blaze, Dawn loved you. We all knew she did, and that’s why she did what she did to save you. If the roles had been reversed, you’d have done the same thing. Please, don’t beat yourself up over it.”

Blaze reared up and slammed her forehooves down into the gravel. “That’s just it!” she roared. “Those things were meant for me! It should be me under that Equestria damned muck, not her… not her…”

The pale grey pegasus mare collapsed to her knees, tears flooding down her muzzle into the freshly dug earth. And all I could do was watch helplessly as my fellow watch pony poured out her grief, hugging the mounded soil that blanketed the final resting place of her beloved Dawn. I moved to put a hoof round her, but it was clear from her body language she wanted to be left alone. They wanted to be left alone. Turning away, I solemnly walked away down the row of graves, unable to comfort a friend. In time, when she was ready, she’d share her grief with us all, and we’d talk about the good times, the bad times, the happy, the sad, and we’d be there waiting for her when that time came. Watch ponies looked after their own.

My legs followed their own course, letting the Fairlight mind wander into places it probably shouldn’t whilst the chief’s words rang over and over through my head. Goddesses help us all, whatever was going on it wasn’t going to end well for Equestria. Just what were we going to do? Who could we trust? Being off the watch was bad enough, but the way this was heading, would there even be a watch to go back to? I mentally slapped myself; this wasn’t the time to be melodramatic. Rounding the next row of graves, a green pony in a large straw hat came into view. She was lying on all fours, her muzzle resting on her outstretched forelegs. I could hear her plaintive sobs as I approached and the hopelessness of despair etched onto her beautiful face. She didn’t look up when I knelt beside her. A fresh bunch of marigolds had been placed on the grave. It was a neat, understated plot; tidy, well kept, and with a simple marker:

Chief Officer Apple Pop

Manehattan Watch

“Dad”

I lay there in quiet contemplation next to my wife. I didn’t deserve her and I knew it. A terrible part of me wondered how long it would be until she had simply had enough of her lot in life, of being the wife of a watch pony, and one day would simply no longer be there when I awoke in the morning. Today had been a sample of what that terrifying future would hold, and it scared the hell out of me. To lose Meadow would be like losing my heart. I couldn’t live without her. There would simply be… no meaning. The pit opened in front of me and my soul marched blindly on towards the precipice.

“He would have been so proud of you, you know.” Meadow’s voice was barely a whisper. “Dad was the strength in our family, the one we felt would be there to protect us. Be there, with us, forever.”

I kept silent as Meadow went on, “When I was in high school, Dad was already Watch Chief. We were proud of him, and I think the other fillies and colts were jealous of us because of that and used to tease us. My brother, Silver, would stand up to the bullies and face them down. Just like Dad would have.” She smiled through the tears and reached out to nudge the flowers into a neater pattern. “He was on a shout to a school fire in the fourth precinct. Suspected arson, they said. Who it was or why they did it, nopony ever knew. It was all so… pointless. It was late at night and the school should have been empty. The fire department was still there, and Dad had gone in with Captain Mitre to have a look around before the forensic team arrived.”

It was hard to imagine the big blue pony as the same rank as myself, and younger too. He looked the sort who’d been middle aged when he was still a foal. I listened intently though; Meadow had never told me what had happened to her father.

Meadow closed her eyes and swallowed before continuing. “He and Mitre entered the school library and found…” She paused, struggling with some inner conflict. “They found a foal. He’d been…he’d had his…” Meadow took a deep breath, but began to shake. I removed my thick worn watch coat and placed it over her as she gasped, “He’d had his tummy cut open.” Meadow let out a cry of distress, covering her muzzle with a foreleg.

“Meadow…” I whispered, but she waved me off.

“He’d had his organs removed and they were strung up, like streamers, all around the bookshelves. Dad and Mitre couldn’t do anything for him. He was… he was already gone.” Meadow’s eyes were open but narrowed, staring off into some world I couldn’t see. And one I didn’t want to see wither. My own eyes were stinging as it was. The waves of raw emotion rolling off my wife along with the mental imagery I was receiving, had me on the verge of tears.

“Mitre thought he heard a noise and went to investigate, and Dad went with him,” Meadow said quietly. “After the fire there were no lights in there, only what they could see with their lanterns. In the darkness of the library alcove they heard a foal, crying…” I held my breath involuntarily. “She wasn’t alone. There was another with her - a crimson coated stallion. Dad didn’t get a good look at him, but he saw enough. He was… doing things to the little foal. Dad never said what it was and Mitre wouldn’t talk about it at all.” She took a deep breath. “There was a fight. The crimson pony shot Mitre with a hoof held crossbow. Dad only had his truncheon on him, and he pulled the foal off the table to safety, but the other pony…” Meadow whimpered, shaking her mane before looking across at me. “He stabbed him. Just like that, right in the back as he held the foal. It was like his life meant nothing, nothing at all… just a piece of meat.” Meadows eye’s were wide and staring now, pain searing through her mind and words with a clarity that only the kind of agony she had experienced could express. “He was my dad, Fairlight! That dirty animal, he stabbed my Dad, he…” She was coming apart fast. I put a foreleg around her and pulled her into me while gently resting my head across her neck. She resisted momentarily before she continued. “When they failed to return to the team in the school yard, the Lieutenant sent in another team to look for them. They found Dad and Mitre, alive but in critical condition. Dad was lying there, still sheltering the foal in his forelegs. The crimson pony was long gone. The first I knew was when mum woke me and Silver to help her look for dad when he didn’t come home. We took a cab to the watch house. They told us about the fire, but nopony knew where he was. Mum was hysterical. I was so frightened, all I wanted to do was find dad, and so I ran out into the night and headed for the school. I ran and ran and ran…”

I nuzzled Meadow’s neck to try and reassure her that I was there for her. All I could do was hold her and pray that she knew I would do whatever I could to help her through this.

“The ponies at the school told me dad was at the hospital.” Meadow blinked a tear away and sniffed, brushing her muzzle. “They wouldn’t tell me what had happened, but the looks on their faces… Oh, Fairlight, I… I’ll never forget the look on the faces!” She pushed me away suddenly and hauled herself to her hooves to look down at me. “I ran all the way to the hospital. The watch ponies offered me a ride there, but I just ran. My mind was a blank. All I could think of was finding dad and making sure he was okay.” Meadow began to shake again, whether with the cold or her distressed state, I wasn’t certain. “He was-” she began. “Oh, Fairlight! He…”

I gave her a reassuring smile, “It’s alright love, take your time. I’m with you, and I’m not going anywhere.”

She nodded. “Dad was just… lying there. His eyes were open but they were so distant, like he wasn’t quite there somehow. I think that was one of the things that frightened me the most; they’d always been so bright and full of life. But now he was just… staring. There were tubes and magical monitors and… and they were sticking into dad and…” Meadow stopped to steady her breathing. “I tried to hold him, to tell him it was going to be okay, but the nurse stopped me from hugging him. He just looked across at me and smiled, Fairlight. Smiled! After what that monster had done, my dad actually smiled at me.” She hung her head and cleared her throat. “The alarm on one of the machine went off and the nurse called the doctor. He ran into the room and pushed me to one side. Dad had… stopped breathing. I didn’t know what was happening at the time and tried to stop them from ‘hurting’ my dad, but they just continued and shouted for the nurse to push me out the room just as Mum crashed through the doors. I’d never seen a look like that on a pony’s face before Fairlight, and to be on my own mother’s...” Tears started anew. “The Doctor tried Fairlight, he tried so hard to save dad, but there was just too much damage. I remember the way he looked at mum. I couldn’t quite hear the words, but I could see his lips moving. ‘I’m sorry’. That was it. ‘I’m sorry’. Dad was gone. Mum’s screams were deafening. I can still hear her sometimes in my dreams you know? Crying and screaming out at the world that took her beloved husband. My dad.”

My heart was aching for her. Dear Celestia, was this what Meadow thought could happen to me, every time I went out to work? Goddesses, I never truly realised until now. In my narrow minded view on life I simply saw the watch as a means to an end, a way to help the everyday lives of common ponies and make some money for my family. The strain it put her under… Luna forgive me…

Meadow wiped her eyes and pushed her muzzle into my neck, breathing in my scent. “She never recovered from the shock. Mum was like a ghost after that night, and Silver and I spent most of our time with family relatives or with Mitre and Shelly. She simply… faded away. The doctors said she died of a broken heart. I… I didn’t even think that was possible.” The beautiful green mare walked several steps away before turning back to me with a determined look in her big yellow eyes, “I don’t want to fade away, Fairlight. I don’t want to find you hooked up to hospital monitors and tubes, dying before my eyes. I won’t have it, damn you Captain Fairlight! To hell with the bloody watch and to hell with your stupid oath to Celestia!”

“Meadow!” I exclaimed at her words. I’d never heard her swear before. It was a taboo in our home and I was careful, usually, to respect her aversion to it.

“I don’t care, Fairlight! You’re mine and I will be damned if I let anypony take you from me!” She shouted her words with a conviction that made the hairs stand up on my back and even lowered her front into a fighting stance. I was shocked and, I hate to admit, slightly aroused by her aggressive stance. This was a Meadow I had never seen before, and a facet of her which I found oddly exciting.

She advanced on me, a strange look in her eye. Her muzzle nuzzled into my neck before she retreated a step, eyes closed, to inhale the smell of my cloak. “It smells of you,” she said quietly. “You were wearing this when we met, remember?”

“I remember,” I replied. “You were wearing that hat too.”

Meadow pushed her hat up on her head and walked away down the gravel path, a slight glance over her shoulder beckoning me to follow her. As I trotted to catch up to her, she began to canter away. I increased my pace but she broke into a gallop and turned off into the woods. What the hell was she doing?! I galloped after her but she was pulling ahead. Damn, she was fast! Seconds later I’d lost sight of her and was forced to slow to a trot, then a walk, gasping to catch my breath. I was blowing hard. I was built for strength, not speed, Celestia damn it all. What was Meadow playing at anyway? I leaned against a tree, sweat steaming off my flanks as I tried to slow my racing heart rate just as something large and blue crashed out of the bushes to my right, bowling me over onto my back in a blur of legs and… wool?

“Too slow my dear,” Meadow grinned down at me, my cloak was still wrapped around her.

“Wha-?” I began, but she pushed me roughly to the ground with her forehooves. The green mare looked me over with her lantern yellow eyes searching mine, her pupils wide, steam rising from her body in the chill air. She huffed a deep breath and pushed her muzzle deep into my chest.

“I don’t want to lose you, Fairlight. Please. I can’t lose you…” Meadow breathed heavily.

I licked my lips; the gallop had dried my mouth out. “You won’t love,” I said gently. “I’ll quit the watch if I have to. I don’t want to see the mare I love cry because of me ever again. Not as long as I live.”

Meadow lifted her head and suddenly clamped her mouth over mine, her hot breath filling me, her tongue hungry and desperate. My forelegs guided her into the kiss and we lost ourselves in each other for what felt like an age, until finally, she pulled away from me. “No love. I don’t want you to leave the watch. I don’t want to lose part of who you are. Just… just promise me you’ll be careful. Please?” I nodded silently. “Mmmmm… good.” She moaned softly and began rubbing her haunches back and forth along my stomach, all the while gazing lovingly into my eyes. “My Fairlight...” she sighed, and gave me a smile, the smile she gave only to me. Meadow was the one in charge this day. I was her stallion, and she was my mare.

“I love you, Captain Fairlight,” she whispered to me as I gripped her hind legs with a gentle, yet firm embrace.

“I love you too, Nurse Meadow,” I smiled up at her.

Birds rose from the canopy as her cries resounded throughout the chill air of the quiet forest.