Decent Challenge

by Mal Masque

Arrival and the First Challenges

Realm of Equus, the Nation of Equestria

Many species of Equus give Equestria a bad rap for not handling themselves properly in times of crisis. Whenever danger seemed to rear its ugly head, the ponies would tend to panic, rampage, and completely freak out while the national heroes took care of everything and the Royal Guard does diddly squat. However, when living in an almost completely peaceful and harmonious society, of course they would not be rightly prepared for when something does come along. Such is the case when strange purple clouds began swirling over the infamously renegade Everfree Forest. While most would simply attribute the strange clouds swirling in an unsual vortex of ominous indigo fluff just to be another factor of the unusual Forest’s behavior and weather patterns, some would note it extremely unusual with the fact it surged with bright red lightning. The clouds and lightning could be seen from miles around, blotting out Celestia’s Sun on a day where no one would expect so much as a dainty wisp, shrouding the area in a haunting mist. Pegasi who attempted to clear the clouds away found themselves struck by the red bolts, sending them to the ground oddly unharmed. The swirling clouds manifested themselves near the center of the Everfree Forest, the bolts of red growing faster and more violent as it all congregated in the center. Finally, in a large burst of raw energy, a gargantuan electric surge rocketed to the ground, striking the center of the Forest with a thunderous boom. As soon as it had arrived, the clouds were suddenly gone from the sky, as though none of it had even happened in the first place.

Observing it on high in her castle perched atop the great Canterlot Mountain, Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria and matron of the Sun, sat in her room with her eye focused on the ground where the clouds had struck and swiftly balanced. It was an odd occurrence to be sure, one noteworthy of the untamed Everfree Forest, but no cloud in her years had she seen carry such an unusual magical flow with them. The instant the clouds had arrived, Celestia felt an unnatural disturbance in the flow of magic Equus strongly carried. Being an Alicorn, an amalgamation of the three pony tribes of Equestria, Celestia could tap into the natural river of magic all around them and sense disturbances. This odd rupture in the river of magic carried with it the ferocity and unforgiving wrath of a hurricane, and the clouds brought with it an unease of pure mayhem. And just like that, once the bolt struck and the clouds faded, it was gone. The disturbance had vanished altogether and the magical flow was at ease once more. Yet something still didn’t feel right. Celestia quickly took a parchment and ink quill, unrolling it and jotting down a message to the closest aid possible.

“Dear Princess Twilight Sparkle,” Celestia read as she wrote. “As you no doubt have felt, there was an unusual change in the natural magical order of Equestria when several strange purple clouds passed over the Everfree Forest. The change has seemingly vanished, but I cannot be too sure what could happen. Please, my dearest former student, keep a vigilant eye for anything could happen. This disruption seemed unlike any I had ever felt before, not since Sombra or even Tirek have I felt this much malice. Please be careful and report to me anything you can find. Sincerely, Princess Celestia.” The letter completed, Celestia cast a spell upon the parchment, bursting it into green flames and sending it off to the recipient posthaste. Once again looking to the Forest where the bolt struck, the Solar Diarch couldn’t help but feel at unease. What is this change, and what could it mean for her and her little ponies?

---

Deep within the untamed wilds that is the Everfree Forest, where animals fend for themselves, weather moves about on its own, and beasts of all sizes and strengths stalk within the underbrush, a deep crater had formed within the woodland ground, red smoke drifting from the edges of the impact. In the center of the crater, kneeling to the ground, encased in his traditional black armor and holding his halberd tight against his breast, was the unscathed mighty warrior of the Three Kingdoms. Lu Bu rubbed his head from the disorienting feeling of his incredibly taxing transport, his skull buzzed and stomach turned while his feet threatened to give out. Minor setbacks. Lu Bu thought to himself, straining to rise and overcome his taxation. Once Lu Bu stood to full height, the mighty warrior noticed that he held something other than his halberd in his hands: a parchment of sorts. Lu Bu opened his hand, unfolded the parchment, and saw that his unexpected savior had left him a letter.

‘Enjoy the ride, Fengxian?’ The letter said. ‘It’s hard to get used to for the first couple of times, but you get used to it. Alright, so you’ve set foot in the realm of Equus, more aptly the peaceful and ignorant nation of Equestria. This is where you will start with teaching the denizens of this realm how to handle a fierce opponent in real battle.’ Lu Bu inwardly grinned at the anticipation of being able to draw his blade once more and bring it upon vermin again. ‘There are a few obstacles, however. So, my first task for you is to eliminate the Elements of Harmony, six incredibly powerful folks who best represent those qualities I told you about earlier. Unfortunately for the both of us, I have no flipping idea who they are or what they look like. So good luck hunting! I’ll check on you in about a month! XOXO Hun Luan.’ Lu Bu took his eyes off the paper, a perplexed expression on his face.

“’XOXO? What the hell does that mean?” Lu Bu asked himself. Grunting a bit, he crumpled up the paper and tossed it aside, having little need for it anymore. “Well, no point in wasting time by standing around.” Lu Bu steadily pulled himself out of the crater and into the Forest proper, marveling at the rather sparse landscape he now stood in. Trees towered high above, obscuring the sky with a canopy of green, while various plants dotted the lush grass about, and the chitter and roars of unusual animals bounded off the forest walls. Lu Bu grumbled, grabbing the trunk of a rather thick tree. “Why didn’t Hun Luan bring me closer to civilization?” With a simple squeeze, Lu Bu tore a chunk of the tree out with a single hand and allowed it to topple aimlessly on the ground. A startled, animalistic yelp came on the other side of the fallen tree, directing Lu Bu’s attention to… possibly the strangest thing he had seen since encountering that Spirit of Change. While he had heard something akin to a dog yelping, Lu Bu was surprised to see that on the other side of the tree was a wolf-like creature completely comprised of timber and sticks, a glowing green core at the center and haunting yellow eyes. The wooden wolf snarled at Lu Bu, bearing its fangs and uttering a low growl as it stalked towards the strange two-legged creature that nearly crushed it with a tree. Lu Bu smirked, holding his halberd at full length.

“So, you wish to challenge a warrior?” Lu Bu asked. Spinning his halberd between his hands, Lu Bu swung it about several times in fashion to display his power, until finally swinging it at a nearby rock. While it had appeared he missed, three seconds passed and a cleanly cut slice of the rock fell to the ground with a thud. “THEN FACE ME! I RELISH A CHALLENGE!” Clearly, the wooden wolf was outmatched by this strange creature, so it recoiled slightly, and threw its head back in a loud howl. Soon, five more howls responded, and more wooden wolves joined the original. Now Lu Bu was outnumbered. This was definitely bad. For them. Bellowing a war cry, Lu Bu sprinted at the wooden wolves while his opponents bolted at him as well. Once the six wolves were in range, Lu Bu swung his halberd at full force, smashing three bounding wolves and sending them flying into a rock where they shattered into splinters. The other three wolves leapt at their attacker, hoping to overpower him, but Lu Bu was faster, having sheathed his halberd, grabbed two of the wolves by their necks while he simply bashed his head on the third wolf, sending it spiraling to the ground in pieces. Lu Bu roared once more, sprinting along the tree line with arms spread wide and hands tightly gripped on the wooden beast’s necks, he slammed them through several trees and stones, breaking cleanly though them and breaking the wolves bit by bit. By the time he stopped, Lu Bu looked at his hands and saw he held nothing but twigs and splinters in his hands.

“Pathetic vermin.” Lu Bu grunted, dropping the twigs. “That was pest control, not a challenge.” A thundering roar from a nearby brush reverberated off the trees, redirecting the battle-hungry warrior’s attention. Stalking from between the trees was a large lion-like creature, sporting bat wings on its back and a large scorpion-like stinger in place of its tail. The beast roared at Lu Bu, its fangs gleaming brightly and spit spattering the warrior’s armor. “This, however, may prove to be a challenge.” Widening his legs and spreading his arms, Lu Bu beckoned the beast to come for him, to which it promptly responded with a vicious charge. The instant the beast reached him, Lu Bu sidestepped and grabbed the beast’s stinger tail, and with a mighty tug, pulled it to the ground. Roaring louder than the beast, Lu Bu dodged the attempted stings and simply gave a tight squeeze. Once the beast fell limp, Lu Bu held the tail tightly as he slowly began to spin about, taking the beast with him. Eventually, Lu Bu had built up enough momentum to pull the beast off the ground and form a small whirlwind of black and orange. Eventually when the he became naught but a blur, Lu Bu pulled out his halberd, held it carefully against the stinger, and cut. The beast flew high into the air, yowling in pain as its tail writhed about in Lu Bu’s grasp before finally going limp in his hands.

“Not even so much as a sweat.” Lu Bu said, dropping the stringer onto the ground. Once again starting to find his way out of this forest of beasts, Lu Bu rounded a corner and accidentally set his foot in a thick muddy marsh. Grumbling at the thick coating of muck on his boot, Lu Bu propped his foot against a large rock in the center of the mud and began scraping. Much to his surprise, the large rock rumbled as a pair of reptilian eyes opened up. Lu Bu partially withdrew his foot as the rocks moved and revealed to be a massive craggy crocodile, bearing its sharp teeth and opening its jaws wide. Lu Bu simply rolled his eyes, pressed his foot down on the stone crocodile, shutting the beast up, before bringing his foot down hard. He withdrew his foot, and slammed it again. And again. And again. And again. And again. After a solid five minutes of gratuitous stomping, Lu Bu pulled his foot out of the mangled pile of rubble that once was a crocodile’s head and stormed off.

“Nothing but vermin in this damnable forest.” Lu Bu complains, wandering through the brush again. A loud squeal redirected Lu Bu’s attention, as an absurdly large boar charged through the clearing, eyes red and tusks ready to gore. Lu Bu idly rolled his eyes, held open his hands, grabbed the boar’s tusks the instant it was in range, and lazily snapped its neck. The boar fell dead upon the ground, while Lu Bu seemed hardly even exhausted. “A true disappointment.” Lu Bu kicked high off the ground, leaping into the air and landing atop the trees, overseeing the forest and all its grandeur and mystery. He could make out the rustling in the brush, no doubt other vermin who scurried away from him in fear of angering an even greater beast than they. This was not amusing in the slightest. “ISN’T THERE ANYTHING THAT CAN PROVIDE ME A DECENT CHALLENGE?!” As his call to battle echoed across the landscape, a loud rush of wind swept across the tree tops and picked up Lu Bu’s tassels. The mighty warrior braced himself from the sudden wind, when suddenly his sight was overtaken by a great shadow that seemed to blot out the sun. “What in the heavens?” The shadow moved on, and Lu Bu could see its master with shock and awe, a great beast only heard of in legends amongst his people. Wings spanning at hundreds of feet, a golden sheen of scales from snout to tail, fangs ridged and spines profound, horns curled like great rams, and a gaze that would freeze men in their tracks. Lu Bu had the honor, nay the privilege, of watching a dragon land before him.

“Who calls to battle?!” The dragon bellowed, smoke billowing from its nostrils as it reared its elongated neck about the forest. “Who carries the voice of a warrior of might to call upon the wrath of an Elder Dragon?” Lu Bu gaped at the great lizard before him. It was gigantic, easily larger than the Emperor’s palace or even Luoyang itself! Legends told of the might and wisdom dragons held, and how many valued them on par with the gods themselves. To actually defeat one in battle would bring about great honor to the victor, but it was a nigh impossible task. For anyone except Lu Bu, that is. The might warrior drew his halberd and with a steely look of determination bounded from the tree, several feet in the air, screaming war cry as he drew closer to the ultimate challenge. He would do the impossible, something not even the great warriors of legend could even draw a candle to, defeat a dragon in combat mortal! However, as Lu Bu drew close to the dragon, ready to strike, it reared its head around and swung a massive claw at him. “PEST!” Lu Bu wasn’t fast enough, and once the gigantic beast’s hand made contact, Lu Bu felt something he hadn’t felt in ages: broken. The impact alone shattered several bones in the mighty warrior’s body, his armor cracked in several small places, a gob of blood erupted from Lu Bu’s mouth, and most importantly, his pride was beaten down. The dragon paid no heed as Lu Bu sailed far away from the impact site, the mighty warrior coming to a final landing in a clearing near the edge of the Everfree. As the warrior lay on the ground, broken and bleeding, Lu Bu could barely keep himself awake as he saw a set of four black and white striped legs come towards him. And finally he allowed himself to be claimed by darkness…

Author's Note:

You taunt the readers with a cliffhanger ending?!
Yes, I did, what of it? Keeps the suspense flowing. Now rest up, big guy, you've got recuperation for the next chapter. There's a meat bun in it for ya.

Any-Bun, this took a bit longer to write (due to computer technicalities and running out of ideas on what Lu Bu would fight in his first outing in Equestria), but hey, it's finally out. Keep in touch and enjoy future updates!

~IDA Official, Head Writer Mask

Comments

[The laid back hunter]

Finally someone points out how useless equestria's military is and how dependent they are on the elements seriously discord was the only enemy that the elements were needed to defeat. Chryalis Sombra and Tirek could have been defeated with proper military might also why is the planet called equis ???? I'm going guess that Lu Bu wasn't at one hundred percent otherwise that fight would have gone on longer.

[Mal Masque]

7138570 If news about how incompetent the Equestrian Royal Guard is new to you, you have missed out. As for Lu Bu falling to the dragon, yes, we would say he lost due to remaining fatigue from the Battle of Xiapi, but also from hubris, which is how Lu Bu lost according to history. Big head and big muscles may go hand in hand, but still can lead to disaster.

[The laid back hunter]

7138587 it isn't news to me it's pretty obvious if you pay attention. Shinning armor did a terrible job we all know it hell now that I think about it luna probably the only one that sees some the flaw in their kingdom's defense.

[Mal Masque]

7138680 Don't get my STARTED on Shining Armor (although, I will admit, he was pretty hilarious in the Season Six premiere) and his incompetency. Needless to say, the IDA has a fun chapter down the line for Shining Armor and Lu Bu...