Periodic Ponies

by Indigo Steel

Argon

Flim and Flam kept their smiles, despite being very nervous; for they now stood before the monarch of all Equestria: Nightmare Moon.

“Your audience is hereby granted.” Spoke the dark Alicorn. “For five minutes.” She added with narrow eyes; the Princess of Eternal Night knew the reputation that followed these two, and looked at them with suspicion. Flim and Flam gulped simultaneously.

Flim spoke first, “Your Excellency, it is no great secret that one of the challenges we face as a nation is sufficient food for all!”

Flam continued, “However, as of late, farms have had difficulty growing sufficient crops due to lack of a certain...photosynthetic requirement.”

Nightmare Moon’s scowl deepened. Being far from a fool, she knew exactly what they were referring to; the lack of sunlight was causing plants to either yield meager harvests or none at all. Celestia’s accursed orb, it seemed, was enacting a slow vengeance for it’s permanent departure. The finest scholars and magi in Equestria, despite making progress, had yet to grant the Night Princess the results she desired. Fortunately, for now at least, the people were fed well enough and remained pacified...one way or another.

“We, however, have come up with a solution!” Flim stated.

“Indeed!” Flam spoke, “We give you…”

In unison they pulled off a silk cloth to reveal a tube of glass set up in an elongated lamp suspended over a short row of plants.

Nightmare Moon raised an eyebrow. “A light bulb? THAT’S your solution?”

“N-No ordinary light bulbs, Your Majesty!” Flim quickly stammered, a trickle of sweat forming on his brow.

“This is no mere incandescent bulb…” Flam explained quickly, “Rather, it’s a new kind of light my brother and I have dubbed ‘Flourescence!’” He flipped a switch on the lamp, causing it to flicker a bit before humming to life, glowing brighter than any bulb yet developed. Prepared for this, the Flim-Flam brothers put on sunglasses, a thing considered mostly useless in this night and age. Meanwhile, the guards and staff nearby found themselves squinting uncomfortably or looking away.

Nightmare Moon, admittedly, was intrigued. “How does it work?” She asked.

Flim motioned to the long cylindrical bulb. “This airtight bulb contains a common noble gas known as Argon...typically as invisible as many gasses.”

Flam interjected, “However, when an electric current is run through the bulb, it excites the Argon gas to produce ultraviolet light that causes a coating of phosphor inside the light tube to glow!”

Both brothers then chimed, “VOILA!”

“Better light!” Said Flim.

“Better crops! Spoke Flam.

“No sun required!” Both Flim and Flam choroused, “A noble gas for a noble cause!”

Nightmare Moon placed a hoof on her chin, stroking it in thought for a solid minute, before she finally smiled. “Whatever you need to mass produce these Argon lamps shall be provided. Congratulations, gentlestallions, you're both about to be quite noteworthy...and quite wealthy, I might add.”

Flim and Flam grinned brighter than their lamp.