Xbox Live Party with Pinkie

by LIGHTNINLANDEN

Chapter #

Chapter #

By: LIGHTNING FLARE

One week later.

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There she stood.

As the remaining pony forces occupying Manehatten pulled back across the bridge a single pink mare sat at the end. She'd known they should have pulled out sooner, but the troops needed Manehatten. It was the last large city in Equestria not covered in ponies and pie.

Pinkie had never seen such a brutal amount of pies in her life, and she worked at Sugar Cube Corner. The griffins and changelings took no mercy on the faces that dared stand in their way.

Pinkie knew they were running out of time. Time the ponies didn't have.

As the last pony crossed the bridge Pinkie flipped open the switch on the detonator and blew the bridge into three different pieces. That dynamite Braeburn and his miners use sure did the trick.

She turned and started to walk towards the final beacon of hope in the fight... Ponyville.

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It was a restless night.

I was tossing and turning all night. The room was hot and smelly and I could hear the faint noise of something I didn't want to know was happening above our room.

Nick was sound asleep. I had no idea how he did it! It was a mixture of confusion and envy that I was experiencing when I first noticed the light sounds of what sounded like hoof steps in the hall way... wait, hoof steps?

I got to my feet and went to the door. I looked through the little eye hole and sure enough there was a little pink pony wandering the halls. She looked very nervous, confused, and had a little bit of paper on her snout she was reading as she wandered the halls.

I cracked open the door and got her attention by whispering her name. "Pinkie."

She turned and looked at me. "Hooray I found you!" she yelled, “I was beginning to think Twilight gave me the wrong room number.” she said as she tossed the little piece of paper to the ground.

"SHHHHHHH.... are you trying to get caught!? Get in here!" I said as I ushered her inside.

"Landen I'm fi.... who's sleeping beauty over there?" She pointed at Nick.

He turned over on his side and let out a gracious snore. "He's the other guy you sent isn't he? You know the guy to help me out?" I asked confused by her questioning of the one she herself sent to help me.... she did do that right?

"Who the hay are you talking about? I didn’t send anypony else to help you out."

Great. I had just taken a random stranger from a gas station on a trip across the nation. Now I had three crimes under my belt. Theft, assault, and Kidnapping! What joy!

"What!? You mean you didn't send him to help me!?" I asked in disbelief.

"I didn't send anybody. You're the only human I have contact with." she said.

"How'd you get here then?"

"Oh... I jumped in through some kid’s laptop." she giggled. "You should have seen the look on his face! Priceless!"

"Pinkie! You can't just do stuff like that or we'll be dealing with a lot more than just testosterone pumped ass holes!" I said as I remembered back to the gas station.

Suddenly Nick sat up, jumped out of his bed and locked eyes with Pinkie's.

"Too early, don't care." He said as he walked into the bath room.

"Well he seems nice…" Pinkie said dryly.

"I'm willing to bet my life he's not a morning person. Now we gotta get you back home! Where'd you say you got in here?" I asked.

"Some kids room down the hall. They were just leaving though." she said frowning.

"How are we gonna get you to a computer screen?"

We both sat down and looked at the ground scratching our chins in thought. Nick walked out of the bathroom a flushing noise announcing his entrance to the thinking session.

"Wait!" he said. "I have an idea...."

"Oh... really?" please don't let it involve me, please don't let it involve me!

"Yes! And it involves you!"

Damn!

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I trudged down the hallway of the smelly old hotel with Pinkie on my shoulders.

She had miraculously found a large brown trench coat, an old brown fedora, a pair of sunglasses, and a fake mustache that just so perfectly made us both look like a ten foot tall pink faced child molester.

"Hello… good day to you mam.... wonderful weather we're having isn't it?" She said to the many people passing by in her best impression of a deep male voice. I thought of how insane it was that no one even bothered with us.

Then again I wasn't complaining. The less people stopped us the faster we could get to the internet cafe which meant the faster I could get this heavy pony off my back. I felt like I had the weight of... well a pony on my shoulders. She may not look like it at first but Pinkie was in no way as light and fluffy as her mane was. Not saying she's fat, just saying she could use a... bit less sugar in her diet.

"Pinkie we gotta speed this up!" I whispered frantically. "How are we gonna find the desk without me being able to see where I'm goi..." then I stubbed my toe on the front desk.

"Terribly sorry for that my good sir," Pinkie said in her impression. "Would you kindly point me to the direction the... int-ere-net calfe.... is located?"

.... There was close to no amount of face palm available for this moment in time.

I couldn't see the direction the manager at the desk pointed and had to rely on Pinkies kick to the left rib after a couple seconds of very awkward silence fell between the thre... I mean two of them.

"Pinkie.... never mind. Where are we going?" I asked.

"Just keep going straight for aboooooout.... one more step."

SMACK

I walked face first into the door which erected an ooof out of both of us. This in turn caused the manager to look over the desk at us right as the disguise fell from our exposed bodies.

His jaw literally made a noise because it hit the desk so hard.

"Time to go!" I said as I lifted the pony from my shoulders and threw her into one of the computer screens. As her body went through it she had managed to get turned around and chomp down on my clothes ripping them off me as the rest of her went through.

So there I stood. In my heart covered underwear and socks staring at the computer screen. I turned and looked at the manager right as he dialed the last one in which I was assuming was nine one one.

"Well...” I sighed “I'm boned." I stated as my feet started tearing at the hard wood floor trying to get some traction to start sprinting back to our room.

I trucked down the hall way dodging through people as they covered their kid’s eyes or simply looked at me in disgust. Upon arrival of the room I realized my key was in the pocket of my jeans. I started frantically pounding on the door waiting for Nick to get off his lazy ass and open it.

"What the hell are you doing?" A voice asked from down the hall. When I turned I saw the most beautiful thing in the whole world.

Nick standing there choking down a muffin and holding the key to the room in his left hand.

"No time to explain pack your stuff we are leaving!" I said as fast as possible while I snatched the keys from his left hand and lunged back to the door. I heard the door click and put on the closest items to me. A Christmas sweater (no idea how that got there.) and a pair of khaki shorts. Needless to say I looked ridiculous with the red nose reign deer on my shirt but I didn’t care.

"Come on man we gotta go! Now! The cops are coming and if we get caught this whole things a bust!" I yelled to Nick as I packed up the rest of my things into my backpack.

"Hey I don't know if you remember, but you kinda just told me to get in the truck. I don't have anything except that sweater!" he explained.

"This thing is yours? Never mind! We don't have time, come on out to the truck! Let's MOVE!"

We were both exiting the room when we saw the first officer trudging down the hallway. He was a pudgy man with handle bar mustache and looked to be in his late forties. "Stop in the name of the law!" he shouted as we turned to sprint away only to be stopped by the sight of the second officer. He was a lot taller than the other man, probably six two, he looked a bit like a monkey but was easily in his early twenties.

"Stop criminal scum!"

"Nope!" Nick shouted with a grimace as he to a head first dive out the window directly in front of us.

"Nick! What the fu..." was all I was able to say until I got pulled out the window myself.

We landed in a large garbage bin filled with cardboard boxes and smelly black plastic bags.

"Hurry! We gotta get to the truck!" I yelled to Nick.

"Jenkins god dammit! How could you just let them go like that!" the pudgy one yelled as he came to the window.

"Sorry sir, I should have known you couldn't have moved your fat ass any faster than a slow crawl." he replied with a smirk.

"Jenkins, shut the hell up and jump out that window. I'll meet you down stairs."

"What!? Why me!? You've got more padding than I do." he said as he climbed out the window. He jumped and hit a particularly smelly black bag that blew up in a explosion of dirty diapers and baby powder.

I heard the older man chuckling as he came out from the lobby and jumped into their car. I was already pulling out of the driveway when they were both in the car. I took off down the old dust road. The felt like it was melting my truck.

The officers were gaining. I realized there were only two options I had. Hope these guys are as bad at driving as they are at being police officers and just keep going forward. Or I could go off road considering this truck was literally built for it.

I took option two.

The engine roared as I planted my foot to the floor and turned sharply on the wheel getting a small fish tail as I charged into the dry desert landscape. The cops followed us in but were quickly lost in a plume of dust and sand that surrounded them. I turned sharply again back towards the road and started speeding back down it.

We were already too far away to see the car when the dust finally settled.

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We pulled over at an abandoned gas station to take a break. I had been driving for almost a whole day and the road had almost lulled me to sleep on a couple occasions so I decided it would be a good idea to get out and stretch a bit for the long nights drive ahead of us. I figured we couldn't stop in towns or really at all any more considering we were now fugitives of the United States government. The same government I had to convince to help a world of ponies that could or could not exist. It wasn't until a week later that I would have that question answered.

Never the less, my heart stopped when I saw black vehicles coming towards us from both sides escorted by two helicopters. Three were black but one seemed a bit out of place. It was a police helicopter and when it broke off from the pack and circled around us over head I noticed our two favorite police officers sitting in the back.

Damn, this is about to really really suck isn't it? Why can't I just live a normal life?

"FREEZE FBI!" half of the men and women yelled as they jumped out of the black vehicles.

"Landen, I'm gonna kill you if we make it out of this." Nick said to me as one of the agents came up to him kicked him into the dirt and zip tied his hands together. Soon another agent did the same to me.

"You're a real piece of work scumbag." he said as he pushed my head into the back of the SUV.

"You have... no.... idea." I said flatly.

It was a long car ride to Washington D.C. not to mention way passed where I was supposed to be in Minnesota. Better get comfy.

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I was walking along a pathway through a heavily forested area. Birds were singing a beautiful melody and the sun was high in the cloudless bright blue sky. The scent of pine trees was all around and the sound of the breeze traveling though the branches and leaves fit perfectly with the song the birds were singing.

I was alone... but it was a different kind of 'alone'. I was tranquil and at peace with my body and mind. I felt I could walk like this forever and never ever stop. Then in the sea of green I saw something unusual and out of place. A small pink tree. The leaves were a little deeper tinted than the brighter more vibrant shad of the trunk. It was alone. Not with any other tree, in fact it seemed the other trees were avoiding it. Shunning it even.

I walked over to the tree, sat down next to it and leaned my back against it.

The tree seemed to lean back against my body.

Then the sun grew larger and brighter until all that existed was a bright white light.

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I woke up in a very dark room. One single light hung above my head and swayed gently as if there was a breeze in the room.

My eyes finally adjusted to the darkness present and an outline of a man sitting across from me presented itself to me.

"So, talking to pink ponies, stealing your parents vehicle, kidnapping another teenager, and running around naked in the hallway of a hotel in the middle of Idaho... and you're not on drugs? None at all? Well than... I'm impressed." the voice was deep and gravel like. It was unpleasant to say the least.

"Look man…" I started but was cut off as the man slammed his fist down on the little metal table and shouted at me.

"DO YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME OR SOMETHING? YOU DON'T GET ANY RESTARTS BUDDY! THERE'S NO CHECKPOINTS!" he stopped and took a breath. "You screwed up.... big time. And now it's time for you to answer to those screw ups."

"Hey man! I'm doing my best here! I know I've done wrong but I have people depending on me right now! People who won't survive any longer unless I can get them the help they need!" I yelled at him. It seemed like no one got the kind of time crunch I was in.

"Yeah well tell that to the..."

The door opened and a furry pink man walked in dressed as a diner service man from a fancy hotel.

"What the hell is this! How did you find this place." the man reached for his gun right as the bell hop said "Dinner is served!" and threw the tray at the man’s head knocking him unconscious.

"Why do you look so familiar?" I asked the man.

The bell hop ripped off his cloths revealing a surprisingly well disguised Pinkie Pie.

"Pinkie!" I yelled in joy.

She ran up to me and slapped me. She slapped me! And I just showed her how happy I was to see her too!

"That's for throwing me into Froggy Bottom Bog! Meanie weanie!" she said to me with a frown dawning her face.

"Oh come on! You know I didn't mean to!" I pleaded. She finally gave me a sly grin and said "you're not forgiven... yet!"

"Oh come on Pinkie!" I protested.

She bit at the zip ties around my wrists until they broke. Nick poked his head in the room and told Pinkie and I we didn't have much time.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye until next time." I said with a sad smile on my face.

"I guess so..."

Awkward silence filled the room; I didn't know what to do so I stuck out my hand as if to ask for a handshake. She jumped at me and brought me into a hug. She smelt like cotton candy. I hugged her back for a few seconds and then broke the embrace.

"Until next time," she said “I’ll keep in touch!" she pointed to my ear. I dug in my pockets and found the little ear piece and slipped it into my ear. I gave her a small smile than got up and out the door.

We both went opposite ways until I heard the familiar sound of her jumping into a computer screen.

"Dude, that was really awkward. Like super awkward."

"Thanks Nick, I hadn't noticed." I said as we sprinted out of what looked like an abandoned warehouse.

"Man! All of our stuff was in the truck! We're so boned!" I exclaimed.

"Well I know a guy who knows a guy who could get us to the Mall of America lickety split!" Nick said.

"....... You had this contact this whole time?! We could have avoided all of this!" I yelled at him.

"Hey man! You didn't ask!"

"Just tell that guy to tell the other guy do help us get there!" I told him.

"Already done! You can thank me later by the way." he said.

"Thank you for wh..." just then a helicopter flew over head and landed in a clearing in front of the warehouse.

"But.. you just..." I stuttered.

"That's not even the part you should be thanking me for." he said slyly to me. I didn't catch his drift until I saw her step out of the plane.

She was absolutely gorgeous. She was around my age and had brown hair, a fantastic figure, and beautiful green eyes.

"Thank you..." was all I was able to mutter.

Comments

[Lionheart]

deh fuq

[clap2times]

...

In a good way

I guess

[steak boy jeff]

neat!

[LIGHTNINLANDEN]

The amount of randomness in this story is too damn high!

[344forever]

i was like O.O then i was like ?.? now im like o.o

[reader of the night]

Lots of Pinkie, sheer awesomeness and lack of reality. Yep this fits.
Have some Pinkie's

[Gysp3]

at first started question then I went its pinkie pie

[LIGHTNINLANDEN]

First off everyone, I would like to give out a sincere apology for the tardiness of the next chapter of this story. In return for your patience I have decided to make the next chapter much better and longer than its pedicessors, it will contain drama, comedy, action, and maybe even a bit of romance if I can work it in properly. In all honesty I haven't the slightest clue as to what the next chapter entails, but fear not, for it shall be at the very least intriguing. Thank you all again for your support. If you would be so kind as to follow @LIGHTNINLANDEN on twitter and retweet my tweet about the next chapter to help me get some more readers it would be very much apreciated! Thank you for your time and good day.

[Signia]

1179425
You get a fav and a like, please don't disappoint me :3
Really, this is a great fanfic so far. I come here every single day to see if it updated :c