Why people hating my FOE story when it just started. this story has been in planning since 2013

what is the real problem with my story hmmmm some one tell me

Their are a few grammar problems, even I could help but I'm not vary good. I'd say you need to get a good editor, thair are people who can do that you just have to poke around it seems. Anyway, the concept seems interesting enough (I kind of want to think that your the kid of shining armor but that would be too op) but I think that the entire thing needs editing before you can realy progress and you should realy get it done before you upload it like it seems you have.

I kind of have to assume English isn't your first language, and I think that an editory will realy help.

6667356 I am English I was born in the UK and still live in the UK it's just that its been along time since I wrote a story based on a game, plus a week ago yesterday someone already took the job

6669084 alright, thats good ^-^ it just does have alot of trouble... in that presuasion.