Can We Shoot Them?

by The Devious Writer

Please?

Applejack rushed in to the throne room with Apple Bloom in tow. Twilight sighed in relief; they were all here now. Applejack took her seat, still panting, and Apple Bloom stood beside her, awed by the interior of the castle.

“We all came as fast we could, so who’s rump do we need to kick?” Rainbow Dash looked pumped, ready to spring into action. The other ponies around seemed to take the situation more seriously. Discord stood beside Fluttershy, boredom plastered onto his face.

Wait, when did she say this was urgent?

“I… never said you all needed to be here right now, you know…”

“Oh, come on!” Twilight coughed as the gathered ponies groaned in response. Discord chuckled, appearing beside her.

“Well, princess, excuse us if we interpreted your ‘EXTREMELY IMPORTANT’ notice to mean ‘gather immediately’. I was in the middle of a wedding, you know. That old buzzard was so disappointed when I had to go.” Twilight coughed again, deciding to ignore him.

“So, I called you all here today because I was bored.” A chorus of “Huh?” rang through the room. “I had this hypothesis on the workings on the Elements of Harmony ever since we first defeated Discord.” Said draconequus perked up in interest.

“I initially thought that the Elements accepted only ponies they approved of, so that their magic could not be used by misguided individuals. But it was after we froze Discord that I realized that if the Elements could choose the ponies who wielded their power, then surely, they could also choose not to harm individuals who aren’t causing trouble, right?” The ponies seemed to consider this.

“Why exactly am I here?” Discord looked unamused, a flat expression on his face.

“Well… I just thought you’d know whether I’m right or not. You did seem to know a lot about how to disable the Elements, as well as the Tree. You also helped me figure out how to open the chest.” Twilight smiled at him, who simply rolled his eyes.

“That’s an interesting theory, Twilight, but why are we all here? I’m sure the other princesses would be much more qualified individuals to discuss the workings of the Elements.” Rarity seemed perplexed at the choice. Twilight rubbed her hooves nervously.

“Well, ever since I first thought about it, I’ve wanted to test the theory out. But if I was wrong, then we’d have had a lot of explaining to Celestia as to why we shot some innocent pony with the Elements. But then Celestia taught us the releasing spell for Discord, so we could have tested it then. It completely slipped my mind because I was on edge with Discord being newly reformed, and soon after, I became a princess and we had to put the Elements back in the Tree.” The others nodded in understanding.

“So, now that we have Rainbow Power, which basically works just like the Elements did, you wanna blast someone to see if they work, right?” Pinkie Pie seemed excited at the idea. Perhaps she wanted to transform again, if just for the sake of it.

“Oh… no you won’t. I am not going to be a test subject for your little experiment, Twilight.” Discord crossed his arms, disapproval clear on his face. Twilight shook her head.

“Well, Discord… I’m not really sure if you’d be the best subject, given your track record. Not to mention, you used to call yourself the Spirit of Disharmony. I was thinking we shoot the Cutie Mark Crusaders!”

“What?!” Rainbow Dash flew up to Twilight, glaring at her. “There’s no way I’m going to risk harming them just because you’re curious!” Rarity and Applejack also stood up, positioning themselves in front of their sisters.

“That’s another thing I wanted to ask you, Discord. Did it hurt when the Elements turned you to stone?” Discord raised a brow at the question, then scoffed.

“It hurt my feelings, Twilight.”

“I’m serious.”

“I’m serious too!”

…

“No, it didn’t hurt.” Twilight rolled her eyes, then looked to the other ponies. It was Fluttershy who objected.

“But, Discord… When we used the Elements on you, you started screaming! Are you sure?” Discord mumbled.

“Yes, I’m quite sure.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Then why were you screaming?”

“No reason.”

“Discord…”

“I was… sc…”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.

“I was scared.”

“What?”

“I was scared! Are you happy?”

…

“See? Nothing to worry about. Doesn’t hurt, and if anything does actually happen, we can just reverse it. Please~?” Twilight felt anticipation crawling through her. She needed to know!

“Ah think that’s up to them to decide!” Applejack pointed at the Crusaders, who glanced at each other. Rarity and Rainbow Dash agreed. The Crusaders jumped onto the Cutie Map, whispering to each other.

“We’ll do it!” The Crusaders chorused happily. “Cutie Mark Crusaders Target Practice!” Twilight stood up, excited. The others followed suit, and Discord stepped back, curiosity written across his face. Twilight called for the power of the tree, and soon enough, a Rainbow emerged from the walls of the castle, shooting through her being. She felt the power of harmony wash through her until it became a part of her.

“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” Rainbow said. Looking down at the Crusaders, they were struck with awe, admiring the ponies floating in the air. With a thought, they shot their power at the Cutie Mark Crusaders, who braced themselves. Instantly, they disappeared, and the ponies floated back down to the ground. Twilight felt a bit of disappointment at the Tree.

“So, I guess the Tree trusts us enough to make these decisions.” Twilight muttered. The others nodded, and Discord rushed up to them nervously.

“Did you girls actually tell your Rainbow Power what you wanted to do to the fillies?” His nervousness was contagious.

“What do you mean? We directed the magic at them and let it do its thing!” Pinkie said. Discord slapped his forehead with his lion’s paw.

“You don’t just let Harmony do whatever it wants! Even I don’t let chaos do what it wants! You all clearly wanted me in stone when you hit me, and you wanted Tirek locked in Tartarus, so that’s exactly what you got. Do you even know what you did to those three?” The ponies looked to each other nervously, before Twilight shook her head.

“It doesn’t matter. We’ll just use the releasing spell on them. and they’ll be back in a snap!” Discord shook his head.

“Do you even know what to shoot the spell at?”

…

“Twilight, you better think of an answer real soon, or you’ll find yourself a unicorn again overnight.” Rainbow growled. Twilight glanced nervously at her friends.

All their manes were really long. Rarity had two tails. Their hooves looked like they were painted by foals. Why were they so ugly?

Focus! She wracked her brain for answers. Surely, the Rainbow Power would release them on their command… Wait, that actually made sense!

“Duh, girls! Discord said it! The Rainbow Power does whatever we want it to do. We just get it to bring those three back, or reverse our latest actions, and the CMC will be back without a scratch!” The others seemed to accept the answer, and called the power immediately.

Author's Note:

Should I just remove the Comedy tag?

Comments

[silvadel]

I expected something interesting to happen to the crusaders, not just have them vanish. This could have been really interesting. (neutral standing, no tu or td).

[josue]

i know that was going to happen the power did not know what to do with them

[Meep the Changeling]

This is only bad comedy because the punchline is not a punchline. Comody is rooted in tragedy, but twisted in an unexpected way. A "Nothing happens" joke is rarely funny unless people realy expect a specific thing happening. i recommend redoing the part from the CMC being hit on with a different punchline.

[Sparrow9612]

I have to agree that something more interesting could have happened to the CMC. Maybe the Rainbow Power gives them superpowers or something?

CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS SUPERHEROES YAY! cdn.broni.es/images/emotes/mlp-abyay.png cdn.broni.es/images/emotes/mlp-sweetie.png cdn.broni.es/images/emotes/mlp-scgrin.png

[SkittleQueen]

XD

[Fluttershyisacutegal]

interesting