My little Hellsing II

by Mr Wolf

Meet the Parents

"How did Alucard hide an attack helicopter in my castle?" Asked Twilight. "More importantly, where did he get it?"

Integra shrugged. "I don't know."

They were currently watching Alucard chase down Spoiled Rich in a military grade helicopter after she 'complemented' on his way of life as well as his fashion sense. The whole 'I'm-gonna-kill-you-and-use-your-blood-to-season-my-breakfast' was well known to everyone and Alucard was not unaccustomed to the sneers and comments regarding that. But never, and I mean NEVER, insult the vampire's choice in wardrobe.

"PREPARE TO BE KILLED!" Alucard shouted in rage.

"I AM NOT GOING BACK ON MY WORDS! YOUR CHOICE OF CLOTHING IS ATROCIOUS!" Spoiled shot back.

"BITCH I EAT PEOPLE!"

Alucard would have said more had he not needed to avoid a missile that headed right to him. The warhead flew past and demolished a cabbage stand, much to the annoyance of it's owner. When the vampire looked to see where it came from, the source was revealed to be none other than Anderson in an attack helicopter of his own.

"Surprised to see me you heathen?" Anderson asked.

The crimson vampire laughed. "And here I thought my boner wouldn't get any bigger."

"Sieg Heil~" Sang a German voice. The two men looked to where the voice came from and, sure enough, the Major was revealed to be coming at them in an attack helicopter of his own. "This is fun! Why don't I get out more often?"

And so began the three way duel between three attack helicopters. Frankly no-one knew what happened as everyone just ignored the trio as they began to fly over the Everfree.

Heinkel walked up to Jan Valentine and his brother. "Does that fat bastard ever exercise?"

"Nah." Replied the Millennium member. "He tried it once, made everyone lose their lunch."

Luke narrowed his eyes. "In any case, shouldn't we doing battle right now?"

The Vatican agent just gave a shrug. "I would, but I think the fact that there are attack helicopters being piloted by three of the most mentally questionable people in the world shooting at each other should be violent enough for today."

Meanwhile, Twilight and Integra were busy chatting on how it much it was going to cost to repair the damage being done by Alucard.

"Whilst there are not many buildings in there, a lot of wildlife could be killed." Explained Twilight.

The vampiric Hellsing nodded. "And Fluttershy will no doubt cry about it, Discord becoming mad as a result, and thus resulting in a duel between him and Alucard."

"Should we warn Zecora?"

"Don't bother, they're coming back over."

Twilight looked up and saw three airborne vehicles coming over Sweet Apple Acres. "Ponyfeathers."

---

Twilight nursed the migraine she had received from the Ponyville Town Council when they presented her the forms in regards to the 2 million Bits worth of damages done to the town as well as the construction of three new houses that were destroyed in the fight, the medical bills of over a dozen citizens and a letter from Chrysalis stating she is willing to change her ways, as long as she keeps her original appearance.

Just how is she suppose to reform a villain, when there is something as enticing to Chrysalis as hanging out with Alucard? Not to mention how difficult it would be to schedule everything!

Her thoughts were interrupted when a pair of blue and white alicorns flew in, looking like as though the world is about to end.

"Celestia." Twilight greeted happily. "To wha-"

"HIDE US!" Screamed her former mentor.

"What?"

Celestia grabbed Twilight in her forehooves. "Hide us! The most horrible thing has happened!"

Twilight began guessing. "Tirek escaped again!?"

The diarchs shook their heads.

"Discord has gone back to being evil!?"

Nope.

"Yakistan declared war on us?"

She was ice cold.

"Then what?"

Luna spoke. "Our parents, King Oranos and Queen Gaia, are coming to visit us."

Twilight suppressed a laugh. "That... doesn't sound so bad."

"They don't know what happened in the past two thousand years!" Screeched the night princess. "They don't know about Tirek, they don't know about Sombra, they don't know about Discord, they don't know about Nightmare Moon, THEY DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU AND CADANCE AND THEY DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE WEDDING FIASCO WITH THE CHANGLINGS!"

"And the worst thing is they want to see what we did with our castle, you know, the one currently sitting wrecked in the Everfree!" Added Celestia.

Then the two planets met and an explosion occurred. The parents of the beings who controlled the sun and the moon, coming to Ponyville, where Alucard is.

"Oh no." whispered Twilight. "They might run into Alucard."

The three of them immediately vomited.

---

A week had passed. Celestia and Luna had written back to their parents, giving them their new address and they would like to explain some things. The plan was that over dinner the two of them would reveal everything that happened in the past two thousand years to their parents. They would then introduce Twilight and Cadance the next day, when the two newest alicorns arrived via balloon.

They had made sure that Alucard, or anyone on his hit/enemies list were far, far, FAR away from Canterlot. If worse came to pass, then the damage must be minimal! Alucard would only cause unnecessary 'collateral' damage.

But now, it was the time for the moment of truth. Today, King Oranos and Queen Gaia will grace Equestria with their presence for the first time in two millennia.

Celestia watched as a ball of light descended from the heavens. She had not seen her parents for so long! She was nervous and excited. The ball touched the courtyard tiles, and the guards present immediately stiffened. Then the light died out, revealing two alicorns, a head higher than Celestia.

The first was a dark blue stallion, with crimson and jet black hair which parted to reveal a LARGE horn. On his wings, the feathers ranged from crystal white, to shimmering black, with hints of blue in between. His eyes were a stern, oceanic color, and he had a flat beard protruding from his jaw. His Cutie Mark, was a white blob, with black dots in it.

The second one was an earth colored mare, with a green, free flowing mane that matched her olive green eyes. Her horn was a equally long as her husband's and her feathers ranged from dark brown to leafy green. Her Cutie Mark was a tree which was surrounded by light.

At the sight of the Princesses, King Oranos smiled. "My dearest daughters! How long tis been since we have last seen thee."

His wife chuckled. "Dear, remember what we discussed about using the old tongue?"

"But I like it." Pouted Oranos.

Celestia and Luna embraced their parents in a hug. It had been so long since the four of them had been together.

Breaking the hug, Celestia spoke. "Mother, Father welcome to our current residence. We have much to tell you."

Oranos could tell his eldest was hiding something, but he decided it could wait until later.

---

"...and that was how I got Luna back." Celestia finished.

The four of them were having dinner and sharing stories. Needless to say, Oranos and Gaia were a bit miffed at their eldest banished her sister and left her fate up to six ordinary ponies.

Gaia sighed. "Is there anything else?"

"I pray it doesn't have anything to do with my best man at our wedding!" Stated her husband. "Seriously, that guy was a nuisance and menace to society."

Celestia and Luna were both intrigued. "Your best man?"

"Yes. I can't remember his name but he wore red a lo- What's that sound?"

At this point, the Cosmos decided to be a bitch and send an attack helicopter through the walls of the dining hall. I will give you three guesses to who climbed out of the smoldering wreckage.

"GOD DAMMIT!" Shouted Alucard as parts of his body reformed. "Stupid Anderson for investing in 'Alucard-seeking-missiles.'"

He turned and saw two horrified royals and two annoyed ones. "Hey Oranos! How ya been?"

The annoyed king gave a snark comment. "Hey Alucard. I was fine until you showed up again."

"What's it been? Five thousand million years since we the wedding?"

Two thuds drew their attention to were the rulers of Equestria had fainted and were currently in their salads.

"I take it you know those two?" Asked Alucard, gesturing to the unconscious rulers.

"Yes, they're my daughters." Replied Oranos.

Alucard began to laugh hysterically. "Oh man! You will not believe what happened in the past years or so."

And that was how Oranos and his wife learned everything of the last two thousand years from the very person that his daughters didn't want him to meet.

As well as grounding Celestia and Luna for a month, with no cake and games.

Comments

[Manosgr]

8103085
NO

[Marcthelightspark2004]

As well as grounding Celestia and Luna for a month, with no cake and games.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO