• Published 16th May 2015
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An Old Tale in a New World - Impossible Numbers



At this turning point of history, a new frontier is colonized from across the seas. One orange farmer's foal is stolen away, and a new tale arises when three unlikely creatures all meet at the Duende Inn.

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Days 120 and 113, Part 2

The Enchantress shut the door behind her. “OK, we’re alone, though goodness knows why. What did you want to tell me?”

It had clearly once been another shabby room. Each wall, floorboard, and beam had a sprawling map on it, made up of lichen and damp and any grime that refused a quick wipe with a dirty dishcloth. The rags on rails, however, had been replaced with thick velvet curtains like waterfalls of red wine. A burlap sack stuffed with straw was gone, and on the square of thick dust stood a duvet and pillow so thick and all-smothering that it gave the bed the appearance of a giant marshmallow.

The two of them were seated on a hastily strewn rug that they could have sworn had come from an ornate woolly mammoth. The candlelight flickered between them, making their shadows dance.

With shaking digits, Quartzphere laid the satchel down at her hooves, which poked out of the folds of cloak and rags as two splashes of aquamarine on an otherwise grey form. She pulled back her hood, and untamed locks like fluff-dried kelp poured down her left cheek and along her outstretched neck. He felt it was only right to assume she was pretty; he wasn’t much of a judge for pony standards.

He just wished she didn’t sip her drink so loudly.

“First, we want to show you something secret,” he said, reaching into the satchel.

The Enchantress lowered her levitating drink. “Um… ‘We’?”

Quartzphere pulled out a puppet. It was made of some iridescent crystal, possibly opal. The face was carved in, and the joints flapped without strings. He almost drew back as the Enchantress leaned closer to inspect it. While it was probably just an accident, the horn, he couldn’t help but notice, was pointing at him.

“Hmm.” She stroked an idle lock of her mane. “Crystalline marionette, common in unicorn country. It’s cute.”

“I have a tale to tell.”

Quartzphere coughed into his clenched fist, and warmth flowed through his veins. Despite the creak of the floorboards under his rump, he could close his eyes and see his pack gather around him, ears cocked and necks craning for his words.

“We fled from the Temple,” he said. “We took refuge in lots of cottages and in jungle. Then we heard you were here. We followed rumours, and then found you at Duende Inn. And here we are.”

He leaned against the wall and beamed at her.

“Uh… the Temple?” she said.

Quartzphere massaged his snout. “The Temple where they keep the ponies, of course!”

“What ponies?”

“What pon –” The Diamond Dog stopped and breathed in deeply. “Of course. Let us try again. We know why you are here, Enchantress. You seek missing pony, Naranja Pétalo. I know where Naranja Pétalo is. Crystal Puppet saw her too. She is with the ponies at the Temple.”

“Oh, good. That’s near the town, right? This ought to be quick.” The Enchantress sipped her hot chocolate. Quartzphere swallowed the drool that tingled in his mouth.

“No. It’s in the rainforest.”

An outbreak of coughing met these words. He opened his eyes and wiped the flecks of chocolate out of his fur.

“Oh,” she said, and flashed a smile at him. “Good.”

“You believe us, right?”

“Yes. I’ll set off in the morning. I just, uh… I need to get my rest now.”

She could hear his blinks. Diamond Dogs tended to be lax about hygiene and hadn’t yet figured out how conjunctivitis worked.

“Enchantress doesn’t need sleep. It said so in The Thousand Year Journey. When they say you wandered a thousand years, they mean you wandered a thousand years.”

The Enchantress waved a hoof airily. “Yes, but that’s just, you know, stories. Fairy tales. They go over the top about that sort of thing. I need to get my strength back. You have no idea how much hard work had to go into getting that milk.”

“But you can flatten whole village and city with just one word! I read your Tale of the Dread Witch Wizen! You were amazing in that!”

By the time Quartzphere realized he was on his feet, the spiel had already struck the air. They stared at each other. He quickly sat back down.

“Aw, you’re so sweet.” A red glow seized the furry cheek and shook it, and the Enchantress levitated her steaming mug to her lips. “Forget the sugar and milk; I should dunk you in this stuff.”

Quartzphere chuckled nervously. “Er, yes. Thank you. I think…”

“But even a world-renowned Enchantress has to have her beauty sleep, you know.” She threw back her mane and tossed the hot chocolate down her gullet. “Just give me until morning. Or until next Tuesday. It’s not much to ask for. Then, I’ll need to gather some food, maps, money… you know, provisions and stuff.”

“Provisions? Quartzphere is hearing you’ve been here a very long time.”

Before she could open her mouth, the Enchantress was besieged by scroll after scroll of spiky writing and inkblots. Claw marks punctured the tops of the scrolls, and sometimes the claws holding the parchment slotted into place.

“I don’t understand,” said Quartzphere’s voice from behind the papers. He stuffed them back into the satchel. “I read The Lady of the Foal, The Unicorn Prince, and The Enchantress and the Flea. You could easily find anyone you set your mind to, just like when you were always one step ahead of that Unicorn Prince, no matter where he went to hide and what form he took!”

“Mister Diamond Dog!”

The candlelight vanished. Two glowing red orbs and a crimson horn radiated before him, and he whimpered and ducked under the duvet. The satchel thumped onto the floor and knocked the jingling puppet.

“Am I an Enchantress, or am I an Enchantress? If I say I will take the time I need, then I shall –”

The Enchantress suddenly stiffened. A match struck against the door frame and drifted over to the candle. It had no aura around it.

“What? What did you do to me? I felt something… Ah!”

A part of the duvet rose up. Quartzphere’s gaze shot to the outline of the puppet. “Oh no.”

“You are not the Enchantress,” said a voice.

The candle was lit. The match shook itself out and bounced off the Enchantress’ hoof, which pointed at the puppet.

“Wh-What?” she managed to say. “Y-You…” She took a deep breath, but still her lips worked around words that didn’t want to come out. “Wh-What did you s-say?”

Carved features shouldn’t move, but the blank, vaguely happy face contorted into a scowl. “You weren’t even around when those tales were told. You have only been in the role for a few months.”

“But Enchantress well known!” Quartzphere hauled himself out from under the bed. “Enchantress appears in many stories, for hundreds and thousands of years.”

“Yes,” said the puppet. “No one – not even the great sorcerer Meadowbrook – has found a way to live an unnatural and long life. Certainly not young Selkie here.”

Silence reigned.

The Enchantress rammed her hooves together and spluttered a quiet oath. “Wh-What did you call me?”

“Your real name is Selkie. You were a secret apprentice to Augur, the previous Enchantress. The two of you made preparations in case of her untimely death. Wasn’t Augur caught out in a battle over here at some point last year?”

“Um…” Her chest swelled. “It-It is true I was wounded. The enemy had powers I hadn’t seen coming. But I received a call from an angel. He promised me that I would be reborn, strengthened and renewed. For days, I remained in a trance, meditating on my fate –”

The puppet grinned evilly. Its face said: I can see your stupid bluff. And I like it.

“Wounded,” said the puppet, “in a coma, and on her deathbed, all while never letting on that she – Augur – wasn’t the original Enchantress either. So, to keep the legend going, young Selkie sneaked in, inherited the title of Enchantress, and disposed of the body. I believe there’s a burial mound in the depths of the rainforest near a boulder. You carved words on that boulder: ‘A Great Hero, A Great Master, A Great Friend’.”

The Enchantress stared. Her aquamarine fur turned pale.

“Yes,” said the voice in a chuckle. “I know.”

“Who are you?”

“I am the one pulling the strings. The Crystal Puppet.”

Selkie tilted her head as though hearing something. Almost instantly, she was shaking her head and yelping.

“You… You can see my thoughts?” she said.

The Crystal Puppet closed its eyes. Four tiny hooves rose from the floorboards. “Once, I could dive into the depths of your soul. But now I merely glean from the surface. It takes all my effort just to keep this puppet and my mind in harmony. Minds and souls aren’t meant to be moved from their natural homes. That’s probably why I alone survived – OW!”

There was a clatter of crystal on wood. Selkie rubbed her hoof and bit her lip against the howl. The puppet was harder than she looked.

“Soothsayer! You think you can threaten the Enchantress – me – here and now, where no one will ever know you existed…”

Quartzphere gasped. The Enchantress stared at him, and then noticed the glow of her horn.

“I… I mean…” she said.

The Crystal Puppet sniggered. “I think I can threaten Selkie.”

Quartzphere shot to his feet. “Now, now! There’s no need for –”

“Diamond Dog, grow up! You still think this joker is the Enchantress? A thousand years of other mares’ work is all she’s got. Perhaps one or two of her predecessors had the stomach to turn a horn on us, but young Selkie here has a conscience. Now,” continued the Puppet, “I want my body back, and I’m not used to waiting. You want to find your missing foal. I don’t see why there has to be a song and dance about it.”

The Enchantress growled. “I am not your servant.”

“Knock knock. Who’s there. I. I who? I know your secret.”

“And who will you tell?” The horn glowed again.

The Crystal Puppet glared at her, and then hobbled over to the door. The glow outshone the candle.

“Stay there, puppet! I’m telling you to stay there!”

The Crystal Puppet stopped and turned its head. Slowly and deliberately, it raised a foreleg for the door. The glow intensified…

…and then fizzled out. A flare of panic went up in the Enchantress’ eyes.

“What did you do to my horn?” she said.

“No!” said Quartzphere, and then he covered his mouth as though he’d said a foul word.

“It’s another of my little tricks,” said the Puppet. “You’d be surprised how much magic relies on small things not being tweaked.”

She pushed the door open. The Enchantress surged forwards, and was face to face with Quartzphere.

“Don’t do anything to Puppet! She’s my friend.”

“I’m just going to restrain her. I won’t hurt anybody.”

“Just go help ponies. Please. Enchantress must help ponies in Temple! I have seen them too. They scream and cry, and I hear them in my dreams, and I know I carried them in the Temple, and then they stop screaming, but I still hear the screams. And tonight, there be more screams, and I am all the way over here in the Duende Inn, and I still hear them.”

The two stared at her. She glanced from one to the other.

Selkie sat down. “This is getting ridiculous. You! Come back in.”

The door shut. The Puppet placed itself opposite.

“If you’re that desperate, we’ll go tonight. But… But no more of that creepy mind stuff. It’s creepy.”

The Crystal Puppet grinned. “I’ll restrain the urge.”

It wandered out of the room. Quartzphere followed, with a glance back at Selkie. The door slammed.

Once the footsteps died away, she turned to the mirror. To her surprise, there were bags under the eyes that hadn’t been there before.

Her hoof went to her neck. She squeezed tight.


Quartzphere was barely through the arch before he took a desperate breath and clutched his chest. He rubbed his paws harder and harder, shaking his entire body to try and get rid of the smell.

“No gems are worth this,” he muttered. He snapped a diamond from his collar and threw it as hard as he could. “Blood diamond! Stupid diamond!”

“Psst.”

He spun around, ears stretched to the sky.

“Who… Who’s there?”

The Crystal Puppet peered through the furry leaves. “Not nice, is it?”

“You? But how did you escape chest?”

“I would have thought a smart canine like you would be able to figure that one out. Soothsayer? Special talents? Ring a bell?”

The Diamond Dog peered closer. “If you so smart, how come you still here? You struggle to escape from your chest?”

His jaws snapped shut. He struggled and tried to prise them free, but they stayed stuck in midair.

“I know you,” murmured the Crystal Puppet. “You want to run to the nearest town, cry out to every living thing, and point them to this temple. You think this is some kind of fantastic tale, and that however mucky your pack has become, you’ll triumph in the end. So you hold out here, working up the courage, not paying too much attention. Take it from me; you won’t get close. You’ll still remember the screams.”

The Dog swallowed. He fell back onto the pampas grass as the pressure was released from his jaws, and he massaged them. “You… know what I want?”

“Listen, earth mutt. To me, you might as well be an open book in a glass case. I can see your mind yanking on its own leash, begging to flee this temple. But you won’t do it. You see wings and hooves, and then darkness. And even if you could slip away from those two beasts and reach a village, you know what everyone thinks of earth mutts. They won’t hear a word you say. They’ll be too busy tying your noose to a sturdy-looking branch.”

Quartzphere clawed at his eyes, wiping the rain off his face. “And now I know why! Y-You say what is true. But why are you telling me this?”

“Because you need power. I have power. You need me to get out of here alive. You need me to keep your haunches safe at the other end. And I know something that’ll interest you.”

“What?”

“The whereabouts of the Enchantress.”

Quartzphere gasped. “The… The Enchantress?"

Overhead, a phoenix circled and shrieked at the grey sky. He glanced at the vegetation, and then back at the puppet. He knew where he could find his satchel. He knew, if he could unfurl the scrolls inside and see the Enchantress almost rise out of it… His heart thudded in his chest. He didn’t move.

The Crystal Puppet nodded. “It’s a good offer, but I’m in a hurry. Now, I suggest we make ourselves scarce.”

“What? Why?”

“Because a Timber Wolf is coming round the corner.”

Quartzphere spun round, almost hitting the pyramid stone as his claws stretched out.

Chipping fangs drooled sap. Leaves shivered in the wind. Branches creaked under the strides. Twig ears pricked and bark nostrils flared. The green eyes narrowed.

Both of them froze.

As the Timber Wolf threw back its head, Quartzphere seized its snout in one paw, muffling the howl. He lunged forwards. Bits of wood and green scraps flew. The Crystal Puppet winced at the crunches and finally looked away.

Quartzphere pushed the wiggling twig tail through his lips and swallowed. He shuddered, and turned around. Shavings and splinters dotted his mouth and arms, and bits of leg and teeth lay scattered around him.

“Go now?” he whispered.

The Crystal Puppet shook herself down and jumped onto his back. With a swift kick, she had him galloping over the pampas and vanishing into the forest. Vines snapped in his wake.

A few hours later, the howling began. Wooden paws thundered and teeth gnashed.