Seeing Sanguine

by Winged Cat

17: Royal Editing

"THIS is the SIMPLE stuff?" Sanguine's stomach wanted to trade places with her lungs, but she pressed on through the triple loop and roll.

"Yeah! There aren't any trees or rocks to dodge out here." Rainbow Dash took a brief look back. "You're doing great, keep it up!"

A mile out of town, and technically over the edge of the Everfree Forest, the pair of pegasi had put on a performance that would have been the envy of any Junior Wonderbolt squad, except for the lack of special smoke and lights. Part of Twilight's mind could not help but appreciate the spectacle as she watched from a cloud perch. But another part...

Rainbow Dash waved to Sanguine. "Alright, take five, Twilight's being a grump."

Yet another part noted that Rainbow Dash had undoubtedly learned that phrase from Pinkie Pie. It fit how they thought.

As Sanguine leveled out and fought to keep her breakfast down, Rainbow Dash pulled up another small cloud and sat in front of Twilight. "'Sup?"

"I am not being a..." Twilight began to protest.

Rainbow Dash patted Twilight's cheek, specifically the muscles that could either form a smile or a frown - doubtless another thing she had learned from Pinkie.

"Okay, alright, fine." Twilight sighed and looked down. "I've got...a lot to think about."

Rainbow Dash gave Twilight a concerned look. "It's a little harder to be awesome when your friends are hurting. So share, so we can make things cooler."

Despite herself, Twilight had to briefly flash a smile at that display of Rainbow Dash's logic and priorities. "It's Celestia. I...well..."

"Go on." Rainbow Dash looked over at Sanguine, then inclined her head toward Twilight, signalling the now-recovered flight student to pull up her own cloud and listen.

Twilight sighed. "You know she was my mentor growing up. I saw her in action almost every day. I lost count of the number of times I watched her raise the sun. I even tried to duplicate that spell, just in theory, and I think I might actually have a backup in case...well, let's just say I never want to have to find out if it works. Anyway. Point is, she was perfect. No, I thought she was PERFECTION, the very definition of what every pony should aspire to be, defined by her existence and everything she was and did."

Rainbow Dash nodded as she noticed Sanguine settle in next to her out of the corner of her eye. She knew where this was going, but she also knew Twilight had to say it - to herself, mainly - in order to face it.

And indeed, Twilight continued, face falling as she confronted the truth. "I think that image started to crack after she sent me to Ponyville. At the time I was hoping, in my heart, that I was somehow wrong - that Nightmare Moon wasn't about to return. And then when she did, the back of my mind kept screaming that surely Celestia had some master plan and I just needed to pretend to be trying to save the day...until...I did." A single tear slipped from Twilight's muzzle. "Celestia had gambled. She gambled her life, and all of Equestria, on my ability to make friends. Me, who had literally been living in an ivory tower until then."

"Oooh, I've heard this story," Sanguine offered. "But you DID make friends, and together you wielded Elements of Harmony."

"That's not the point," Rainbow Dash countered, giving Sanguine a mild frown. "Let her finish."

Twilight continued to look at the cloud at her hooves. "Yes, I did. But...I don't know, maybe that was some sort of threshold? After that I started noticing cracks, slips. Minor things of no consequence. I told myself they were nothing, or maybe deliberate - signs of some master plan I could not see, dealing with threats or contingencies totally out of my league. That...that lasted until the Grand Galloping Gala."

"The one that was-" Sanguine cut herself off at Rainbow Dash's glare. "Sorry, go on."

"Yes, that one." Twilight managed a brief smirk. "'Crashed', 'ruined', 'made memorable'...I've heard all sorts of words for it, bad and good. Mostly good from those who knew or thought it was Celestia's plan. She did it to liven things up. Not to foil intrigue or because some creature there needed a truly festive party to be appeased or anything. Just, for fun. My nightmares that night were so loud Luna came by to quell them, and then we talked in my dream. She did something to make sure I would remember it. Since then, I have had to accept that Celestia is, i-is..." She sniffed. "...a pony, like us."

"Wait, what?" Sanguine blinked. "We're talking about Princess Celestia, right? The immortal perfect ruler of Equest-"

"Yes," Twilight interrupted. "That is exactly how I used to think of her. It's an image she cultivates, for good reason. But that isn't her. She's very strong, very bright, very kind...but underneath all that, she's like you and me. It...HURT, it hurt sooo much to realize that, I still have trouble with it sometimes. And now..." She shuddered.

Rainbow Dash reached forward and began gently stroking Twlight's mane. "And now you've got to chew her out. This's the first time?"

Twilight nodded. A gentle whine was all her voice would form for a moment.

"Chew her out?" Sanguine was uncertain if she should join in, so stayed back from physical contact for the moment. "For what?"

After a few seconds' contemplation, Twilight finally responded, "Can...I ask a favor?"

Rainbow Dash continued to stroke, as if she could gently pull Twilight's worries away. She had heard Rarity boast of this technique, but so far she had been unable to understand when Rarity explained it. Seeing the pain on Twilight's face, Rainbow Dash made a mental note to ask again. "Sure. Anything."

"I need you to tell me what you think of the letter I am going to write to her." When silence greeted her request, Twilight continued.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

"Spike is like my little brother. The bond he and I share..."

Twilight frowned. "No, let me try again." Unfortunately there was no physical paper to crumple up into a ball, throw, and ignite mid-toss so that only the ashes of unworthy words - that dared insult her friendship with Celestia by their mere existence - would touch so much as a waste basket. Banishing the failed draft from her mind, replacing it with the next draft, would have to suffice.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

"The bond that Spike and I have built up is as thick as blood. He's like my little brother - and now it seems both of us will share a long life. I would hope we can share it together, so it pains me when things happen to erode our trust.

"In short, please don't ever again ask him to keep secrets from me.

"Please, never again, no matter how justified it seems.

"Your fellow Princess,

Twilight Sparkle'"

Rainbow Dash's mane brushing evolved into a hug. "That seems alri-"

"'Your fellow Princess'?" Sanguine interrupted, eyes wide. "U-um. Just a guess, but, that's not what you normally use, is it?"

Twilight shook her head. "Never. It...that may be what hurts the most, that I have to put it that way and not, 'Your faithful student'."

Sanguine's earlier reservations about physical contact evaporated like a puddle on the receiving end of a fireball. She launched into a hug of her own, around the alicorn's torso to compliment Rainbow Dash hugging her neck. "It'll be alright. I'm sure she'll understand, Twilight."

Twilight leaned into the twin hugs gratefully. "Thank you. I hope she will."

They continued in silence for a short while, until Rainbow Dash released the reluctant Princess. "Alright, feeling better?"

Twilight nodded. "Yeah, thanks."

"Good!" Rainbow Dash smiled and grabbed Twilight's hoof. "Because this next stunt's going to take all three of us!"

Ten seconds later, there was no longer any room in Twilight's active mind for worries or doubts or anything but sheer physical action - and trying to keep her breakfast down.