Coming Attractions

by Rouis

Chapter Seven: Trottingham: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut

Rouis Presents:

Long Haul sat inside the caravan his gaze fixed upon the door. The crowds’ cries outside unnerved him deeply, and the fact that Silver Screen was preoccupied with keeping them in line as is showed how well the plan was going. “How the buck did things get this bad?” He asked himself. The crimson pony lifted himself up and paced around the inside of the caravan. From the sound of what was going on outside things were only going from bad to worse. He trotted over to the safe which was left open by Silver. Its contents were nothing more than their accumulated bits, and a muffin kept for a very special moment.

An MLP:FIM-fic

Silver Screen burst in the door the caravan panting and out of breath. “The purchase went through, You ready to blow this place?” The green unicorn asked while he placed a brown paper bag within their safe, and closed the door.

Edited by Gaintgamer

“Yeah, let’s kick this thing off!” Long Haul said before trotting over to the door. What the earth pony was not counting on however, were the hoofcuffs immediately slapped around his forelegs by the law enforcement ponies outside.

Starring Ponies

A unicorn mare stepped out from the crowd of law-ponies that had gathered around the caravan. Her Icy blue eyes flashed pure hatred as she spoke out. “Long Haul, you and your partner Silver Screen are hereby placed under arrest for violation of C.L.O.P.’s orders.”

Featuring Silver Screen

What Long Haul was also not expecting was for Silver Screen to leap out of the door, and tackle Lemon Tree to the ground. He was also not expecting that Silver Screen to scream “Buck the police!” Long Haul was expecting what followed those actions, and had he not have his movement restricted at the moment he would have facehoofed at the sight of Silver Screen being tackled by half the law enforcement of Trottingham.

And Long Haul

Silver Screen writhed and bucked from under the pile of law ponies trying to subdue him. He looked at a madly grinning Lemon Tree, who was picking herself up off of the ground. Silver Screen shouted “You won’t get away with this!” before screaming in pain as the mare used her magic to lift him up by his mane.

Coming Attractions:

Lemon Tree brought the pained unicorn up to her line of sight and simply grinned.“I already have.” The mare calmly stated before grabbing the stallion before her, and flinging Silver Screen against the side of the caravan. His cry of agony echoed through the orange sky.

Trottingham: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut.

<Coming Attractions Caravan: one week earlier>

“He is so late. He is so dead!” Long Haul shouted to himself while pacing around the inside of the caravan. He could hear the crowd chanting outside, and by the sound of it they were growing restless.

“I’m back!” Silver Screen yelled while trotting into the caravan. Behind him a small safe floated along suspended in the telltale green glow of the unicorn’s magic. “I bought us a safe at the market! I figured if we are going to be making anymore bits then we should have a place to keep them instead of just letting them sit there for all of equestria to see!” The safe then set down on the floor of the caravan. Silver trotted over towards it and pointed to a cone shaped indent on the safe. “It’s attuned to open to my horn!” He happily stated.

Long Haul looked at the safe, then looked back at the wildly grinning Silver Screen before speaking up. “So what you're saying is, if anything were ever to happen to you or your horn all our worldly possessions are forfeit?”

Silver Screen tilted his head to the side for a moment in contemplation before giving an answer. “Pretty much” Was all he said.

Long Haul then lightly bonked his friend on the head with a hoof. “Having a safe means nothing if we don’t have any bits to fill it with. Are you ready?” He asked.

“As i'll ever be!” The cheerful unicorn replied.

The duo then trotted out the door to the sight of a large group seated in front of a large white sheet hung between two poles stuck in the ground. Had the duo not known what all of this was for the sight would have looked rather silly.

Long Haul trotted towards the front of the crowd and coughed a little to prepare his voice. Once he was ready he raised a hoof to try and get the crowd’s attention. “Fillies and Gentlecolts, Mares and Stallions! Welcome to Coming Attractions theater.” He then scanned the crowd noting familiar faces. Among them he spotted Java Chip with her husband Short Stack sitting on her back. In a group of idly chatting mares he spotted Page Bound the pegasus in charge of the town’s only bookstore. Down in front amongst a group of schoolfoals he spotted Lemon Juice, and his sister Lemon Drop who seemed to be acting as the evenings chaperone.

I’m surprised to see their mother let them anywhere near us after the scene she caused last week. Haul thought before he spoke to the crowd one more time. “My name is Long Haul, and I’ll be acting as the master of ceremonies tonight. My good friend and partner Silver Screen will be providing the entertainment itself, but enough about us please enjoy tonight's presentation of: The Amazing Spidermane!” Long Haul then trotted out of the way before giving his partner the go ahead nod.

Silver Screen took a deep breath to calm his nerves and let the spell fly loose from his horn. The world around him began to fade away as he could only focus on what lay in his mind which in turn lead to the images sprouting from his horn. The story itself was not that hard to present, but there was an occasional plot point Silver would come across that required some modification to suit the audience. Silver Screen always tried to work in some kind of lesson about personal values into the stories he told, but luckily for him the story already carried a message about using the abilities you have wisely. At the end of the tale he let his eyes flutter open. “What did I miss?” He asked Long Haul. Silver Screen had heard the large earth pony sit down next to him just before he went under the spell’s influence.

Long Haul gave a madman’s grin before replying. “Only the most cliche end movie fight in the entire history of equestrian cinema, but the history of equestrian cinema started two weeks ago so I’ll let it slide.” Long Haul then dodged a hoof intended for his side and moved himself back in front of the crowd. “I hope you all enjoyed the show, we will be putting another on the same time next week.” He watched as the crowd began to disperse, half of the leaving ponies were headed over towards Stack’s Diner for what seemed to be an aftershow snack. He took a moment to gaze up at Luna’s moon and the stars that accompanied the large silvery orb.

“Sure is a great night huh?” Asked a voice that made Long Haul leap into the air out of shock.

The large crimson pony looked over from the source of the noise to see a smiling pair of lemons, or rather Lemon Drop and her brother Lemon Juice. “Geez kid you scared the cutie mark right off my flank!” Long Haul chided.

Lemon Drop let her jaw drop in response before she stomped a hoof into the ground, and responded. “I am not a kid! I am almost seventeen, and a fully grown mare.”

Long Haul backed away a few hoofsteps from the somewhat angry mare. “Sorry, was not trying to set you off. So how did your mother let you come back here after her little episode last week?” Haul asked.

Lemon Drop sheepishly grinned, and looked to her brother before quietly she replied. “Easy, she thinks we’re over at the place doing stuff.” Her eyes widened as her excuse became vague and confusing.

A sharp and commanding yell echoed in her direction as a yellow unicorn mare with a leaf green mane approached. “Young filly what do you think you are doing here at this awful place? I thought I expressly forbade you from socialising with the likes of these lowlifes ever again?” Lemon Tree asked her daughter, before giving a look of total loathing towards Long Haul while levitating a small slip of parchment over to him. “Nevermind that it seems you ponies have no regard for the law of this town, so as chief of the committee it falls on my responsibility to fine you for your transgressions.”

Long Haul looked at the parchment as it left the unicorns magic and fluttered to the ground in front of him. “You’re charging us seventy bits for unapproved performances? What do you mean unapproved? What committee?” The earth pony hysterically asked as his partner trotted over to the scene.

“What’s going on he-” Silver Screen said before he was cut off by Lemon Tree’s ranting.

Lemon Tree flashed a malicious grin before launching herself into an explanation. “You’re little abomination of a show last week showed my husband the error of his judgement. He decided he has let you little pieces of garbage spew your corrupt performances around town without regulation for too long.” Lemon Tree then pulled a larger piece of parchment out of her saddlebags and levitated it in front of the duo before she once again spoke. “Thanks to this bill he passed any and all performers hoping to publicly spew their garbage about town have to go through myself and the committee it establishes. You are looking at the head of the Equestria's first C.L.O.P. committee!”

Silver Screen and Long Haul looked at each other for a moment then burst into hysterical laughter both of them falling on the ground.

Lemon Drop also looked away before snickering slightly at her mother’s outburst.

Lemon Tree looked flabbergasted at the taunting laughter, and demanded an answer. “Why do you laugh at C.L.O.P.? We are not to be trifled with! Once you find yourself violating C.L.O.P.’s will you will find you have entered quite the sticky situation.” Lemon Tree was clearly unaware of the situation’s humor.

Long Haul took a break from dying of laughter to pose a question. “So what you’re saying is that once C.L.O.P. grabs on to something, they don’t let go until the job is done?” The earth pony’s voice cracked at the end of his sentence as he once more resumed dying of laughter, his eyes tearing up from the act.

Lemon Tree let a high and mighty laugh alongside the other ponies, albeit for a completely separate understanding. “Yes now you weep before the power I was given, just know that C.L.O.P. will always finish first no matter what you do!” The unicorn then looked to her daughter and son. “Come with me, we are leaving here now.” she ordered as the three of them began to canter back home. Lemon Tree turned one final time before issuing a warning. “Remember, C.L.O.P. is the law! Should you continue defy us, we will take much more severe actions!” She shouted as she made her way home.

After the one pony scream machine left with her family Silver Screen and Long Haul found themselves calm enough to stand. Silver Screen was the first to break the chuckle filled atmosphere. “If we can’t perform then how are we going to make ends meet?” The green pony
asked as his expression went from being jovial to one of worry.

Long Haul answered flatly. “You don’t need to worry did you see how many bits we made tonight? I counted over two thousand in admission before you came back from the market. We are set for a little while as long as you don’t make any huge purchases, and I don’t think this whole C.L.O.P. thing is really going to be that big.” Long Haul looked down at the citation that sat still on the ground before him. “We just need to go to this committee thing and make our case is all.” The crimson pony then looked over to Stack’s Diner. “I don’t know about you, but I’m hungry as a hors- Ow!” Long Haul yelled as he received a hoof of retaliation for the bad attempt at humor.

Silver Screen grabbed the citation in his magic and placed it within his saddlebags, then with a spring in his step the pony ventured off towards the diner with his friend.

The inside of Stack’s Diner was teeming with life for once, it seemed that with the performance being right across the way that ponies would actually venture into stack’s diner at night.

“Oh hey! Nice show tonight guys!” Java Chip said from behind the two stallions as they looked around the interior of the diner. “Just have a seat somewhere, and I’ll be by when I can. We are actually busy for once!” The coffee colored pegasus said before hoofing her way over to another table.

The duo hoofed their way over to the main counter, and had a seat in their usual spot. “Maybe we should have just went to bed.” Silver Screen suggested while glancing at the multitudes of ponies eating.

“Haycakes take priority over sleep.” Long Haul stated. The large pony looked down at the menus placed before him. It then occurred to him that he had never had anything off the menu other than the haycakes. “Besides Silver, you need to relax. We should be celebrating because as of tonight Coming Attractions Theater is open for business!” Shouted Long Haul. This prompted a cheer from those around them who had been at the performance just a little while earlier.

Silver Screen smiled at his friend’s attempt to cheer him up. “I guess I am letting it
get to me a little bit too much.” He then lifted a cup to his mouth and had a sip of some coffee. “Still is the best coffee in equestria.” Silver let a small groan of pleasure escape his mouth as he eagerly downed the coffee.

“I still say you get too happy over coffee.” Long Haul stated. “You know, that makes me think of something.” He said before taking a small sip of cider that he had been given. After enough meals at the diner, the staff had learned he did not care for coffee.

Silver Screen cracked a small grin. “You mean you think?” Silver Screen faked a gasp then braced for a retaliation that did not come. “What, no physical injury?” The unicorn asked.

Long Haul then replied in a serious tone. “No I’m serious. I was thinking about this the other night. Out of this whole land we have only been in one town this entire time, and look how far we have come!” Long Haul placed his forelegs on Silver Screen’s shoulders and looked him in the eye. “Imagine how much is out there! How much have we been missing this entire time?”

Silver Screen gave a nod to his friend’s wanderlust. “I have to agree with you there, and It would be nice to travel around and see Equestria.” Silver Screen paused for a moment to down some more of the coffee which was keeping him going at the moment. “But think about how well things are going here in Trottingham for the most part!” Silver said before vocalizing his order. “I wonder how the hayburger is.”

“Oh it’s wonderful!” Said the stealthy as always Java Chip from behind the two chatting ponies.

Silver Screen gave a loud “Eep!” of shock before falling over and looking up at the pegasus waitress. “Yeah the hayburger sounds good then!” He said from his now upside down position.

Long Haul turned to face Java Chip and gave his order. “I’ll take the usual Chip,and tell Stack we said Hi.” The earth pony then looked down at Silver Screen and helped him up. “You really have something with laying on this place’s floor huh?” He asked the now upright unicorn.

“It’s comfy!” Silver said with a moronic grin. “Besides Mr. Head Trauma you have no room to talk on that one!” The unicorn made a point by tapping a hoof on Long Haul’s head.

Long Haul brushed the hoof off quickly. “Ow stop that! I still insist you made a crack in my skull or something.”

“Excuse me gentlecolts, but I do have a question. ” A voice said from behind them. They turned around to see a peculiar brown stallion possessing an hourglass cutie mark. “I couldn't help myself from enjoying your performance a short while ago, and believe me when I say it was the most riveting tale.” The stallion put a hoof to his chin contemplation for a moment before he spoke again. “You see the tale simply seemed familiar to one that I have heard in quite the different venue. Where do you draw your influences from?”

Silver Screen’s eyes widened as he realized the full implications of the stallion’s words. “Well you see-”

Long Haul interrupted Silver’s panicked explanation with his own counter. “I don’t exactly know what you're implying sir, but if you’re insisting that somepony among us three happens to not be whom they appear to be. Perhaps some kind of cross-dimensional traveler of sorts.” Long Haul then narrowed his stare to drive the point home. “Well I guess that would seem silly huh? Especially if they did not want their cover blown.”

“Touche” Was all the stallion said before walking out of the diner. He then vanished amongst the crowd almost as rapidly as he appeared.

Silver Screen was flabbergasted at what had just happened he stammered out a question while wracking his brain for answers. “Was that-”

“Yeah” Long Haul simply replied.

“And He?” Silver simply asked.

“Yeah” Long Haul answered.

“So He’s?” Silver Screen asked.

“Definitely real” Long Haul said before giving a grin of personal victory. “At least here he is real.” Long Haul added before looking down at his cider.

“Order up!” Java Chip answered out of nowhere before sliding two plates off of her outstretched wings onto the counter. “You two enjoy, because tonight it’s on the house.” Java Chip cheerfully quipped before vanishing off almost as quickly as the strange stallion had before her.

Silver Screen mumbled something about time lords being so mean before looking down at his hayburger. “There are flower petals on it.” The unicorn said to himself before lifting one up in the green glow of his magic. Silver Screen gave the petal a sniff before allowing it to flutter down onto his waiting tongue. He let himself taste the new food before eagerly finishing off the bite. “Not bad.” Silver happily stated then moved to attack the rest of his plate.

Long Haul watched his hungry friend descend upon his food without magic not unlike he had the first time they had tried Stack’s famous haycakes. “So then I guess tomorrow we will go to town hall and sort this whole mess out then?”

Silver looked up from the demolished remains of his food. “Sounds good to me, but dude how do you eat like that? You know: Just slamming your face onto what lies in front of you.” The curious unicorn asked whilst using his magic to dab his face with a napkin.

Long Haul smiled before preparing himself for mass consumption. “Like this!” He then proudly slammed his face onto the stack of haycakes like a moron. This of course caused several looks of disgust from the various ponies just trying to eat their meals in peace. Long Haul lifted a haycake, and syrup covered face from the plate and simply laughed. The two friends then sat there, and laughed together at the absurdity of the situation.

< C.L.O.P. Approval Meeting, Town Hall, The Next Day>

The inside of town hall was a fairly simple space littered with benches neatly lined up before a grand podium which all together looked quite like a courtroom. Ponies sat all around the room waiting for their names to be called while up on top of the whole scene sat Lemon Tree. At the moment she appeared to be addressing a rather angry blue unicorn mare.

“So you see miss, Lulamoon is it?” Lemon Tree looked up from the stack of documents before her to the unicorn mare that sat in front of her desk. “I can not let your show be put on in this town, it provides no educational elements or benefits to the foals of Trottingham, nor does it interest me at all. Good day.”

The unicorn’s blue coat was flush the colour of embarrassment at her denial. “So what you are saying is that our show is not good enough for your podunk little hovel, and you’re not even going to give us the courtesy of running us out of town?” The mare was absolutely furious with the answer she had been given and delivered a warning. “You will rue the day you messed with the Great and Powerful Lulamoon!” Her eyes then widened at the realization of her mistake. “We mean Trixie! You will rue the day you messed with the Great and Powerful Trixie!” The blue unicorn fumed at her rejection, and then vanished in a flurry of her own magically conjured fireworks.

Lemon Tree hollered at the no longer present mare. “You’re lucky I’m not fining you just for that little display miss Lulamoon!” The also angered unicorn let herself calm down through a few deep breaths before using her magic to pull the next page for review out of the inbox stationed next to her. She let a small smirk cross her face when she noticed the names on top of the page. “C.L.O.P. on behalf of the town of Trottingham recognizes Mr. Screen, and Mr. Haul.”

Silver Screen, and Long Haul approached where the mare before them had stood while awaiting the verdict on her performance. Long Haul of course was the first to speak. “We represent the Coming Attractions Theater, and we would like you to approve this saturday’s performance of Star Wars: The Cantering Menace.”

Lemon Tree gave a bored sigh before speaking. “The records here state that you have not paid a previous violation fee. This unfortunately blocks you from submitting an approval at this time.”

Silver Screen lowered his ears in disappointment at the verdict, and found himself unable to speak in front of the mare that had caused him so much trouble up to this moment.

Long Haul simply narrowed his eyes out of anger before snapping at the mare. “Are you serious?”

Lemon Tree narrowed her own stare as if egging the crimson pony on. “C.L.O.P. takes itself very seriously if you want to submit yourselves for approval again you can do so once you have paid your fees.”

< C.L.O.P. Approval Meeting, Town Hall, The Next Next Day >

“The answer is no.” Lemon Tree flatly stated before stamping the approval form that sat before her with an X. This time the room was a little emptier than the previous day however; this time they were joined by Lemon Tree’s daughter who sat in the back of the room and watched.

Long Haul was losing his patience with the unicorn that seemed to be their only obstacle at the moment. “Why? We played by your rules, submitted an approval form, and we even paid the fees you slapped on us out of nowhere the other day. What else could possible be wrong with our intentions? We just want to entertain.” Long Haul reared up on his hind legs, and slammed his forelegs into the ground out of anger.

Lemon Tree sighed before she got up out of her seat and hoofed her way down to their level. She spoke while she strode down the steps towards the duo in front of her. “It is because I have seen your drivel that you call a show first hoof, it is because I have seen the false delusions your so called show produced in the mind of this town’s fine ponies, and quite frankly it is because I don’t like you.”

Long Haul struggled to keep himself contained and calm during the mare’s tirade. “Miss I have had enough of your hatred towards my friend and I, and I deman-”

Lemon Drop interrupted Long Haul’s response to add her own opinion into the mix. “Mom I think you are being unfair to these ponies.” The young mare then made her way up the aisle, and stopped as she stood in between Long Haul and her mother. “You always do this whenever anypony who does not fit in your perfect plan, and it never used to be this bad.” Tears streamed down from her eyes as she let her opinions fly loose. “You’re not even my mom anymore, You’re a monster!”

“And you’re not my daughter!” Lemon Tree shrieked as she stomped one of her forelegs in anger, her horn bristled with bolts of green magic let loose by the emotion running through the room.

“STOP THIS!” Silver Screen’s voice cried out in the in room as the green unicorn’s eyes darted between his friend, the mare who seemed to have sworn to make their lives miserable, and her daughter. “Why are we fighting? I thought the ponies of this land were supposed to love and tolerate each other.” He screamed at everypony in the room.

Lemon Tree let a haughty laugh loose. “Your ideals are that of a little foal. Obviously you and your trashy earth pony associate cannot change so you have forced my hoof. You, and your associate have four days to remove yourself the town of Trottingham before I will have you both arrested for your intention to violate our laws! Welcome to the real world Silver Screen.”

Long Haul stood still due to the shock of what she had commanded until the reality of the situation hit him. “You have no right to make such orders! I want to see the mayor! Where is Lemon Lime?” He yelled at the mare before him.

Lemon Tree stood perfectly still for a moment before she locked eyes with Long Haul. “My husband is indisposed as he has been for the past three nights, and by his own orders I am to act in his stead while he cannot. My orders are to be taken very seriously Mr. Haul you should be thankful that I’m giving you the chance to leave without atoning for your crimes beforehand.” With that said Lemon Tree turned around, and made her exit through the doors behind the main podium.

Silver Screen turned around to look at Lemon Drop who simply stood there with a look of horror on her face. “Lemon Drop what she said about your father. Is it true?” Silver inquired.

Lemon Drop stood catatonic for a moment, her eyes lost in the depths of the battle of words she just had with her mother. After what seemed like an eternity of silence she finally spoke. “Juice, and I haven’t seen our father for three days. Mom said that he was really sick.” Silence then returned for a moment as they all sat there soaking in the reality of the evening.

Long Haul broke the silence with a cough he then spoke. “Well I guess that’s it then let’s go home.” He then motioned to leave.

Lemon Drop interrupted them before they could reach the door. “Can I come with you, back to your caravan I mean. I don’t really want to go home just yet.”

“I don’t see why not, but don’t hang around us too long. I wouldn’t want to hurt things between you and your mother any worse than we already have.” Silver answered. The three ponies then left town hall together, and walked back to a spot two of them could call home only a while longer.

< Stack’s Diner: That Evening >

Five ponies sat huddled around a table inside of the diner two sat with horrified expressions, two sat and wondered what would come next, and one sat frozen in her own mind.

“It just does not seem fair!” Java Chip shouted into the air. “She doesn't have that authority. Does she?” She asked to the colt-sized stallion that sat next to her on top of some books.

Short Stack’s eyes darted from page to page as he read the book in front of him titled Trottingham Law Registrate. “Unfortunately she does, and she could throw these two in jail for quite a while if they don’t vacate in time.” He sighed before glancing over to Lemon Drop. “Your father would be livid if he found out what your mother was trying to do.”

Long Haul slammed his forelegs on the table, and shouted. “Who cares! She won, and we have to leave. Silver we should go pack up now, and just get out of here.”

“No.” Silver Screen murmured to himself.

“I just don’t see what you two did wrong. You both are total gentlecolts!” Java Chip yelled, the pegasus was absolutely furious at the temporary mayor's decision.

“No.” Silver Screen said again.

“You know for right price you two could by the ca-” Short Stack tried to suggest before he was interrupted.

“No!” Silver Screen yelled, and then looked upon the ponies around. “We are not leaving, or not yet at least.” He turned to face Long Haul and placed his forehooves on the giant pony’s shoulders. “Lemon Tree is mean, but we can’t let her get away with this. I don’t want to give her the satisfaction of an easy win. We need to buck back, and for once Long Haul I have a plan!” Silver turned to face the diner’s owners to explain his scheme. “Chip, Stack do you still have the caravan’s wheels? I’ll also need to show you something Short Stack.” Before the two could answer however; he turned to face Lemon Drop. “Drop your part of the plan is crucial I’ll need you to go into market and see that tailor stallion you directed me to, place an order, and finally go see a pegasus by the name of Page Bound. You are going to be mine and Long Haul’s eyes and ears for this since I’m sure your mother is going to have someone making sure we aren’t up to anything.” Silver Screen reached into his saddlebags with a flash of magic, and began to jot down every last detail of his plan.

Long Haul glanced at the page as it filled with the details of Silver Screen’s plan. He was a little scared of how focused the usually carefree and aloof unicorn acted. “Okay Serious Screen, what's next?” He asked with a laugh. “This might just work.”

< Present Day: Trottingham Criminal Detention Center >

Lawful Aim hated his job, but that didn’t mean he was not good at it. The earth pony stallion’s short cut black mane was tucked underneath a blue officer’s cap. His dark blue coat practically shone back at him from from the mirror that met his gaze. “Time to go take in the latest dirt-bags.” He said to himself before trotting out of the locker room, and into the main lobby of the detention center. Waiting at the entrance gate were a gaggle of officers, the mayor’s wife, the largest earth pony he had ever encountered, and an unconscious green unicorn laid across the latter’s back. “Ma'am” Lawful Aim said as he gave a salute to Lemon Tree. The law pony then posed a question. “What are these two in for?”

Lemon Tree gave a winner’s smirk before she answered. “These two are dangerous criminals who violated an order of exile. Treat them with extreme prejudice.” The mayor’s wife then left the detention center while two officers followed as an escort.

Lawful Aim looked at the crimson pony before him. “Give me any trouble and I won’t hesitate to have you two thrown in the deepest darkest cell we have. Now follow me.” He said while prodding Long Haul forward.

Long Haul slowly hoofed forward as he was led further into the detention center, the cuffs around his forelegs prevented him from moving any faster than a slow gait. The weight of his unconscious friend put a small strain on the very tired ponies back. Eventually they made their way to a series of small cells.

“Stop.” Lawful Aim commanded as two guard ponies stepped up to Long Haul, released the hoofcuffs, and shoved the large pony into an empty cell. This caused Long Haul’s passanger to fall off of his back, and hit the floor with a resounding thud. The lawpony stifled a laugh, and rattled off the standard speech he gave day in, and day out as the cell door was shut. “You are to remain here until the time of your appointed trial, any misbehavior or misconduct will be reported to your judge, and should you be convicted guilty you will be returned here to carry out the remainder of your sentence.” Lawful Aim gave the guards a nod before they all went to leave the cell hallway, and head back into the lobby.

Long Haul turned around and listened for the sound of the guard’s hoofsteps to diminish before leaning down and whispering in Silver Screen’s ear. “It’s now or never, do it.” The large pony then made sure he faced away from the outer wall and bucked as hard as he could, trying to make as much noise as possible.

As the other two guards left the cell hallway Lawful Aim heard the loud bang of a pony’s hooves smashing against the brick wall the building was made of. He galloped back to the recently closed cell at top speed, and gasped at what he saw: The huge crimson pony he had just placed in the cell standing in front of a gaping hole in the wall, and his small green friend still laying on the ground where he had fallen. “Stop right there criminal scum!” Lawful aim yelled as he opened the cell door and charged at the large stallion who simply hoofed out of the way, and left the lawpony to fall out of the hole. What Lawful Aim was not suspecting however; was to hit the hole to suddenly vanish, and for him to hit the wall with a resounding smack. They do not pay me enough for this shift The lawpony thought as he slipped into unconsciousness’ waiting hooves.

“I can’t believe somepony actually fell for that!” Silver Screen said as he got up off of the floor. Hoofed over to the unconcious officer and spoke. “Meep Meep.”

“Did I ever tell you that you’re a nerd?” Long Haul said.

“The biggest!” Silver Screen proudly answered.

Long Haul looked out into the hall and saw that they were clear to begin the next step of the plan. “According to Short Stack’s description of the place we are in the western cell hall, and we need to just go through the door down there to get into the laundry room.” Long Haul said while looking over to Silver Screen who was picking up the lawpony’s keys using his magic. The two ponies quickly galloped out of the cell hall, and down into the laundry room. “Nice hit on Lemon Tree back at the caravan by the way.” Long Haul complimented.

The laundry room had a washing station in one corner, and carts filled with lawpony’s uniforms all around. “Let’s get dapper!” Silver Screen shouted as the two began to look through the bins of clothes to find something that would fit them. After a few minutes of sorting the two were both wearing the blue hats and shirts that made a pony of the law easily recognizable. Once they both finished making the final touches to their disguises the two made their way out into the main lobby. The duo moved as uniformly as possible to not designate any attention to themselves. It was once they were just in front of the door leading outside that a voice called out to them.

“The chief needs to see us in the meeting room asap, and that includes you two clowns! Something about an escape.” Shouted a pink lawpony from across the lobby which caused the two to freeze in place.

Long Haul simply stood there next to Silver Screen for a moment before he spoke. “Sure thing we’ll be right there after we go get some uh-”

“Doughnuts!” Silver Screen said as he finished Long Haul’s excuse. The duo then trotted out the door at an even faster pace. Once they had made it outside of the detention center the two trotted towards the market square until they stood about one block away from their destination. “Okay let’s stick to the plan.” The determined unicorn said as he ditched the lawpony’s uniform in a crate on the side of the street. Silver Screen glanced over towards the market clock ever-present as always in the town, and then looked back to Long Haul. “It’s seven at night, we’re wanted by the police, I’ve got a half empty stomach, and we’re on a mission from Celestia.”

“Right, hit it!” Was all Long Haul said before he galloped off towards his destination. The large pony turned his head back once to wish his friend luck. “You better pull this off Silver! I won’t be able to sweet talk you out of this one if you mess up!”

Silver Screen watched his friend shrink into a tiny shape down the street before he turned out of sight. Silver simply sat there, and counted off in his head until thought he had heard something touch down on the surface next to him. The unicorn looked over to see a familiar pegasus sitting happily on the street with her usual grin. “Hey Chip, and thanks for bringing my saddlebags.”

She trotted forward and let the green saddlebags slide off of her body and on the ground next to the unicorn. “It’s not going to be the same without you two around here you know.” Java Chip said as she nuzzled the unicorn’s neck. “Stackiekins, and I really think of you two as the foals we haven't had had.” She then smiled shyly. “Not yet anyway.”

Silver’s eyes widened as the full meaning of Java Chip’s comment hit him. The unicorn lifted the saddlebags onto himself while he trotted down the street, and turned back to face the mare that had acted as a second mother to the duo during their time in Trottingham. “Well then make sure you tell the dad-to-be that I said congratulations.” He laughed a little at the thought of the tiny stallion raising a foal which would probably outgrow him, and spoke one last time. “Thank you Chip for everything. I promise one day when this has all blown over that we are going to come back.” Silver Screen then galloped down the road headed towards the market square where his journey had begun.

Java Chip sighed as she flapped her wings, and took gracefully to the air. The wind moved seamlessly around her as she took to the skies over Trottingham. From her point of view the town seemed almost like a lit diorama with Luna’s pale silver moon hanging above. “It’s up to you two now, and I have no doubt in my mind that if anypony can do it that it will be you.” She said to the now distant unicorn.

Silver emerged from the side street he was on right into the market. The early night sky stopped nopony from going about their business, although the type of business had changed. Ponies sat at various restaurants having their evening meals together. The street lamp lit ambiance of the market at night was quite the site to see, but Silver Screen had no time to stop and enjoy it for he was on a mission. Once he had made his way to the center of the plaza he looked to the clock tower. “It’s time.” He said to himself before an audible gasp escaped the mouths of several ponies in the crowd.

A large white sheet was draped over the side of a building, and Silver Screen took this as his cue. The unicorn sat down and performed his usual spell this time however instead of telling stories: Silver chose to show is memories. Moments of time from his point of view since the duo had arrived at Trottingham played for everypony to see. The good, the bad, the happy, and the strange alike.

Ponies all around the market stopped to look at the sight unfolding before them. Everypony in the market simply watched as through brief glimpses the crowd was shown it all. The show stopped abruptly, and as the picture faded away they looked to the center of the market where the source of the light lay on his side, with a yellow hoof on top of his head.

“You little piece of trash.” Lemon Tree snarled as she held the weak stallion down. She leaned in until her face was just in front of his. “You’re here alone I see. Did your little friend get sick of your loathsome company and vanish? What did you hope to accomplish by doing this? Giving your location away to me? Was this little act of defiance really worth it? ” The mare asked.

Silver Screen grinned and looked at the mare in front of him. For a second he thought her icy blue eyes flashed into something evil, something much more sinister, but he let that slip him as through the pain of her hooves forcing him down he choked out a response. “I did this to show you something. To show you that you can’t stifle a pony’s creativity just because it clashes against your ideals. Look up again, and tell me how alone I am. This is cinema, and It’s my gift to Equestria!”

Another beam of light struck the screen this time, the images that flowed out onto the screen were the memories of another pony. This one showed them the story of a foalhood romance blossoming into something more grand, and more deep than anypony on the outside could comprehend without having experienced it firsthoof.

Lemon Tree snarled as she let pressure off of the green unicorn and galloped towards the source of the light. This time it was a small unicorn anyone on the south side of town would recognize. “Short Stack, you are Lemon Lime’s best friend! Why would you violate his command just to help out a couple of criminal simpletons!” She shrieked.

Short Stack spat at the mare’s hooves. “You really think I would believe that Limey would pass a bill just to spite some entertainers? You really play me for a fool, but you’re the fool Tree not me, not Long Haul, and not even Silver Screen. You really need to pay attention too, cause you’re letting your so called enemies get away.”

“What!” Lemon Tree shouted as she turned around to see Silver Screen hop into the door of a moving caravan cart pulled by Long Haul. The Mare turned to give chase, and galloped after the caravan that barreled down the main road. “You won’t escape me, No one escapes C.L.O.P. untouched. The only way you’re leaving is if C.L.O.P. beats you first!” Hollered the furious green maned mare.

“Still funny!” Silver Screen hollered as he watched the unicorn chasing after them fade into the distance. Silver Screen used his magic to shut the door to the caravan and carefully trotted up to the front while he tried not to lose his balance in the now moving caravan. The green unicorn opened a window on the front end of the caravan and poked his head out to look at the galloping stallion. “You should have seen her face Haul! I’ll have to show it to you sometime, and I think we’re clear of Trottingham so pull over.” The eager green unicorn shouted as the caravan came to a stop.

Long Haul unhitched himself from the caravan and made his way around it, and up inside of their newly owned home. “I can’t believe we just did that!” Long Haul said while grinning like a madpony. “So now what? Where do we go from here?” He asked his friend.

Silver Screen laughed a little before he tapped Long Haul on the head with a hoof, and spoke. “So for once the always planning Long Haul does not have a plan?” Silver asked. “I say we travel, go town to town and do our performance!” He suggested before trotting over to the wardrobe. “I just hope my vest is still in here.” There was something in the wardrobe, or rather somepony. “What!?!” Silver Screen shouted at the sight before them.

Looking back at the duo was a familiar young unicorn, her yellow mane was a little frazzled from being hidden in the wardrobe for so long. “Hi Guys I’m coming with you!” Lemon Drop happily announced before coming out of the wardrobe.

Silver Screen shook his head .“No, absolutely not. This is foal-napping. Besides what are you like twelve?” Silver Screen asked.

Lemon Drop pouted and looked at the duo, her eyes wide. “I’m almost a full grown mare!” she whined.

Long Haul hopped in front of Silver Screen, and pouted as well. “Please Silver Screen? I’ll feed her, and clean up after her, and brush her mane!” The large crimson earth pony begged.

Silver Screen introduced his face to his hoof and relented. “Fine, but if she’s traveling with us, then she’s going to work!”

Lemon Drop shouted happily then hugged the duo. “I promise you won’t regret this! In fact I’ll help you out now. I heard you wanted to travel around, well there’s a town not far from here called Hoofington we would just need to keep following this road!”

Long Haul smiled and looked at the group down in front of him. Him and Silver had participated in what might be the most interesting few weeks of their lives. He laughed a little and spoke. “Sounds like a plan then.”

< Trottingham Town Limits >

Lemon Tree ran for her life, the group that chased after her closed in with every misstep she made. “Stay away you vile ponies!” She shouted in vain as she dodged another bolt of magic that exploded in a flurry of lights.

The mob behind her was composed of clowns, street musicians, even a mime, but at the lead was a certain blue mare with a light blue mane. The mare kept firing bolt after bolt of pyrotechnic magic at Lemon Tree while laughing. “At least we are giving you the dignity of being run out of town!” She shouted. “You know this is actually quite fun. We could get used to being on the other side of the mob, yes this pleases us indeed! I warned you that you would rue the day you messed with The Great and Powerful Lulamoon!” She shouted before firing yet another bolt of pyrotechnics, but this time her eyes widened at the realization of what she had said. “Once again we mean Trixie! We are The Great and Powerful Trixie!”

Coming Attractions:
Trottingham: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut

Starring:

Silver Screen as Himself

Long Haul as Himself

Lemon Tree as Herself

Danny Devito as Short Stack

Java Chip as Herself

Lemon Drop as Herself

Lemon Lime as Himself

Page Bound as Herself

David Tennant as Doctor Whooves

Trixie Lulamoon as The Great and Powerful Trixie

Lawful Aim as Himself

Written by Rouis

Edited by Gaintgamer

My Little Pony and all associated assets are property of Hasbro Inc.

No ponies were hurt in the making of this fanfiction

Thank You for Reading!

Silver Screen, Long Haul, And Lemon Drop will return in The Hayvengers.... Just Kidding
They’ll be back in: Chapter Eight

< Stack’s Diner: The next day >

Java Chip trotted up from behind her husband and nuzzled his back affectionately. “So then I guess we will need to paint the nursery both pink, and blue then!” She happily cheered. Her husband remained still though, and deep in thought as he read the day’s issue of the Trottingham Gazette.

“This makes no sense” Short Stack said to himself as he read over the words in front of him again.

Mayor and His Wife Found in Basement!

Mayor Lemon Lime, and his wife Lemon Tree were found yesterday evening around eleven o’clock locked in the basement of their estate in uptown Trottingham. The two ponies were found tied together in a mysterious substance, and awoke when an officer shined his light on them. When asked what had happened the two simply replied that they were attacked by an unknown assailant in their home. Trottingham police are still investigating into the incident.

Comments

[Khandarus]

Ok, overall it took me a while to get into the story. Usually I stay away from HiE fics but as it went on the story grew on me. I think you could do with a touch more variety in how you describe the ponies in question, relying on their names a bit too much...but since, with a few exceptions, this is almost all oc ponies it may have been necessary.

I did enjoy the turning of this story archetype into a pony one...and found the acronym hilarious. Also, I did appreciate the fact you gave the villain her comeuppance at the end.

Overall, a decent story and I look forward to reading more of it.

[The Checked King]

So she's worried about their work being morally corrupt and she runs around screaming that acronym?
Truly a genius!

[musicluvr1974]

“You always do this whenever anypony who does not fit in your perfect plan, and it never used to be this bad.” Tears streamed down from her eyes as she let her opinions fly loose. “You’re not even my mom anymore, You’re a monster!”
“And you’re not my daughter!” Lemon Tree shrieked as she stomped one of her forelegs in anger, her horn bristled with bolts of green magic let loose by the emotion running through the room.
“STOP THIS!” Silver Screen’s voice cried out in the in room as the green unicorn’s eyes darted between his friend, the mare who seemed to have sworn to make their lives miserable, and her daughter. “Why are we fighting? I thought the ponies of this land were supposed to love and tolerate each other.” He screamed at everypony in the room.
Lemon Tree let a haughty laugh loose. “Your ideals are that of a little foal. Obviously you and your trashy earth pony associate cannot change so you have forced my hoof. You, and your associate have four days to remove yourself the town of Trottingham before I will have you both arrested for your intention to violate our laws! Welcome to the real world Silver Screen.”
Long Haul stood still due to the shock of what she had commanded until the reality of the situation hit him. “You have no right to make such orders! I want to see the mayor! Where is Lemon Lime?” He yelled at the mare before him.
Lemon Tree stood perfectly still for a moment before she locked eyes with Long Haul. “My husband is indisposed as he has been for the past three nights, and by his own orders I am to act in his stead while he cannot.

Uh-huh. Where have I seen this before. Calling it now--Lemon Tree's been replaced by a changeling, and her husband is "indisposed" because he's in one of their feeding cocoons...!