Rainbow Dash And Fluttershy Get Drunk On Cider And Then Laugh A Lot

by angelbunny

Drinking Out Loud

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, bundled up in their hats, boots and scarves for the winter weather, had just finished putting the final touches on a snowpony they had spent the last hour building together. They were on the outskirts of town with nopony else around but the trees to keep them company. As Cloudsdale natives, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy never got to play in the snow when they were foals and now that they lived in Ponyville, the two friends felt the need to enjoy a second foalhood together every winter to do some serious catching up.

“There,” said Fluttershy. “All done.”

“That we are,” said Rainbow Dash, admiring their hoofiwork. “You know something, ‘shy? We make a pretty good team.”

“The best friends always do,” said Fluttershy as she nuzzled Rainbow Dash affectionately. Since they were alone, Rainbow Dash indulged her friend and nuzzled back.

“Hey, wanna make snow angels with me?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“Sure,” said Fluttershy.

The pegasi picked a spot and did a synchronized fall on their backs.

“Summer’s nice and all,” said Rainbow Dash as she and Fluttershy stretched their legs out and scissored them to push the snow away, “but there’s nothing like good old winter to make a pony really take in the visuals and appreciate the beauty of nature.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” said Fluttershy as she took in the beauty of the white sky.

“I do know of at least one thing that could make it even better though."

“Me, too.”

“Cider,” they said, followed by a sigh and a pout.

“Cider season can’t get here soon enough for me,” continued Rainbow Dash. “It’s all I can think about this time of year. To be honest, I think about it all year round – but winter is the hardest because it means the wait’s the longest.”

“Oh, I know exactly how you feel, Rainbow Dash. Why, I think that I’d do just about anything for a cupful.”

Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow.

“Annnnnnnnything?” she asked with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

“Um... just about anything,” replied Fluttershy as she sat up and looked at Rainbow Dash. “What did you have in... oh, dear... I know that face! It’s the Rainbow-Dash-has-an-idea-and-Fluttershy-needs-to-start-panicking-immediately face! AAAAAAHH!!”

Fluttershy attempted to fly away but Rainbow Dash, who was one step ahead of her friend, bit her tail to keep her grounded. Fluttershy dropped and disappeared in the snow.

“Relax,” said Rainbow Dash as she walked over to Fluttershy and helped her out of the snow. “There’s nothing to panic about.”

“There’s always something to panic about,” declared Fluttershy. “It’s just a matter of how soon one should get a jump on it.”

“Well, my idea is nothing to panic about.”

“If it’s all the same to you, why don’t you tell me what it is and let me be the judge?”

“Rarity and I are two very different ponies. I live for the moment while she likes to plan ahead. I drink every drop of cider I can get my hooves on while she has the willpower to save some for the off-season. I happen to know that she keeps a bottle of hard cider tucked away in her basement. If there was a certain pony who had the key to Rarity’s house, a certain other pony could sneak inside while she’s chillaxing at the spa for her regular four o’clock visit and grab that bottle. We could have at least one and a half cups apiece.”

“But nopony else has the key to Rarity’s house except Rarity herself and-”

Fluttershy gasped.

“Oh, my goodness!" she peeped. "You don’t mean to tell me that you want me to let you into Rarity’s house so that you can take her cider, do you?”

“What a great idea!" said Rainbow Dash. "Fluttershy, you’re a genius!”

“But that’s stealing! Isn’t it?”

“Not if we replace it with another bottle before the end of the next cider season. That thing just sits around collecting dust. She’ll never even know it’s gone.”

“I don’t think so, Rainbow Dash. Rarity trusts me with that spare key. How would you like it if she helped herself to something in your home without asking?”

“I’d be pretty darned impressed if she could even reach it. My cloudominium is way up in the sky.”

“That’s not my point and you know it.”

“Fluttershy, do you remember the way cider feels when it slowwwwwly trickles down your throat... and the way your stomach gets that warrrrrm, tingly feeling inside as its awesomeness travels through your body... and spreads alllllll the way down to your hooves?”

“Yes... oh, yes...” Fluttershy closed her eyes and smiled as she vividly recalled the sensation. She shook her head rapidly and opened her eyes. “...but stealing is stealing.”

“Stealing is such an ugly word. Rarity is the spirit of the Element of Generosity. I’m willing to bet that she’d probably give us the cider if we asked for it.”

“Oh? Well, why didn’t you say so? If you’re so sure of that, then let’s go do that instead. Cider, here we come!”

"NO!" cried Rainbow Dash.

Fluttershy took off flying once again but was brought back down into the snow by Rainbow Dash again. Fluttershy rolled onto her back to find Rainbow Dash standing over her.

"I mean..." Rainbow Dash sneered at her stubborn goody two-horseshoes friend. "Grrrr... Look, here's the deal. You let me in the house, I grab the bottle, and we’ll split the loot fifty-fifty, okay? Now, are you in or not?”

“I’m not,” replied Fluttershy.

“All right, then. I didn’t want to do this but you leave me no choice. Just remember: you asked for it.”

“Oh, no! No! Wait! Please!”

Rainbow Dash blew a raspberry on Fluttershy’s tummy.

“WAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA!!!” squealed Fluttershy as she wriggled to free herself from Rainbow’s torture.

“Give up now and make this easy on yourself!” demanded Rainbow Dash.

“I can’t!” whimpered Fluttershy. “I shouldn’t!”

Rainbow Dash blew several raspberries on Fluttershy’s tummy in rapid succession on different spots.

“AAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAA!!! STOP!! STOOOOP!! I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! YOU’RE KILLING MEE-HEE-HEEEEEE!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!”

“Pinkie promise to let me into Rarity’s house or you get the next one under your wings.”

“Oh-no-no-no-no, not that! Anything but that!” begged Fluttershy. “All right! You win! I Pinkie promise! I PINKIE PROMIIIIISE!!”

Taking Fluttershy at her word, she stood up and let her friend be.

“Yes!” shouted Rainbow Dash triumphantly as she flew in circles. “We’re get-tin’ ciiiiii-der, we’re get-tin’ ciiiiii-der.” Fluttershy spent the next minute lying in the snow, snickering from the lingering effect of Rainbow Dash’s assault.

“There ought to be a law against threatening a pegasus with underwing raspberries,” said Fluttershy with a pout and a sniffle.

“If the idea of taking Rarity’s cider bothers you that much, I’d be more than willing to drink the whole bottle myself.”

“The hoof you will! If I’m going to be an accomplice, I’m getting my cut. It’s almost four o’clock now. Let’s fly to Carousel Boutique and do this. Mama needs her medicine.” Fluttershy licked her lips as she held her right forehoof out to Rainbow Dash for a hoofbump.

Rainbow Dash smiled. She loved when Fluttershy was into a plan of hers, especially if it was a mischievous one.

“Bump...” said Rainbow Dash as her hoof came in contact with Flutershy’s.

“...Chaaaa,” said Fluttershy as they pulled their hooves away from one another simultaneously.

As Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy flew off, a pair of levitated mugs of hot chocolate fell into the snow. Rarity was in the process of bringing them a treat when she hid behind a tree and overheard the two pegasi plot to burgle her.

“Why, those little miscreants!” growled Rarity. “I’ll... I’ll...”

Rarity paused for a moment.

“Hmm... If it’s a bottle of cider they want, then it’s a bottle of cider they’ll get. Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaaaa...” Rarity took a shortcut back to her house to prepare for the betrayal.

Comments

[pendrake72]

@angelbunny...

If nothing else, I applaud your based-upon source of inspiration.

[Hillbe]

"Oh Spikey dearest can I see you for a minute?" As Rarity presented him with an empty cider bottle.
Spike glanced up to the Matsh mellow mare "Wasup with the bottle?"
"Spikey can you fill it for me?" She cooed
"With what?"
"You know what, Like when you go to the Doctors office, But more"
"What ever, Anything for my lady"
"SPIKE! What are you doing with that bottle?"
"nothing"
"Honestly ,Twilight What ever are you implying"